SHARON GREEN

has written:

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER
THE REBEL PRINCE

The Terrillan Series
THE WARRIOR WITHIN
THE WARRIOR ENCHAINED
THE WARRIOR REARMED
THE WARRIOR CHALLENGED

The Jalav: Amazon Warrior Series

THE CRYSTALS OF MIDA
AN OATH TO MIDA
CHOSEN OF MIDA
THE WILL OF THE GODS
TO BATTLE THE GODS

The Diana Santee Series

MIND GUEST
GATEWAY TO XANADU

SHHRON GREEN

THE FHR SIDE
OFFOREVER

DAW BOOKS. INC.

DONALD A. WOLLHEIM, PUBLISHER
1633 Broadway. New York, NY 10019

Dedication:

For Paty Cockrum—and not only for being
a good friend. It took more than a friend to
share Sh'rlii.

Copyright © 1987 by Sharoo Green.
All Rights Reserved.
Caver an by Ken W. Ketly.
DAW Book. Collectors No. 717.

First Printing, August, 1987
123456789

PRINTED IN THE U.S.A.

PROLOGUE

/—Laciel

The room was colder than a small room should be, but not
in front of the blazing fire where she sat. The fire jumped
and crackled, trying to get the attention of the uncaring
gray stone all around it, but didn't even succeed in getting
the girl's attention. She sat in the overstuffedtirown leather
armchair, relaxed but intent on something she seemed able
to see in the air in front of thtf'fire and hearth, something
mat seemed to excite her. Her violet eyes glowed in the
firelight and one lock of her platinum blond hair had fallen
over her right shoulder, but other than that she sat unmov~
ing and unspeaking.

Beside her chair, to the left, the dim, warm air stirred
and began to thicken and darken, increasing until it was
deep black and palpable, beating and pulsing with obvious
life- In the midst of the living cloud were two red eyes,
blazing as hot as the fire, intelligent and aware and con-
scious of power in a way most beings never achieved. The
eyes looked around, saw the girt and the way she stared,
narrowed very briefly with disturbance, then widened again.
The black cloud immediately began stirring a second time,
and in five heartbeats it had assumed a form that was
definitely feline in nature, four legs, large body, long tail,
big head and pointed ears. All black but for the two red,
burning eyes, which fastened themselves on the motion-
less. oblivious girl.

6                            SHARON GREEN

"If you try it, you're a fool." the black beast-cloud said
to her, its voice low and nearly all snarling growl. "More
minds are lost on that plane than ever make it back, usually
because they try it before they're ready. You're doing the
same thing."

"I think 1'hear someone calling you, InThig," the girl
answered with faint annoyance, her eyes still on whatever
she saw. "Why don't you go home and see what they
want?"

"You're scarcely amusing, girl," the beast InThig
growled, stretching its big body out on the stone beside the
girl's chair. "I'm aware of the fact that you don't care to
have people express concern for you, but I'm not people.
And I'm only thinking of your safety."

"Demons aren't supposed to be concerned," the giri
observed, still not looking at me being she addressed.
"They're also not supposed to think of people's safety.
You're a disgrace to the legends, InThig, and should be
ashamed of yourself. If I'd been the one to summon you,
f'dbe ashamed."

"Happily, your foster mother has more sense than that,"
InThig replied, the growl turning dry as the blaze in the
eyes sharpened. "If I could have reached her where she's
traveling and brought her back with me, she would be
telling you the same thing. Going to explore that plane BOW
is reckless madness."

"If I were ten years old, it would be reckless madness,"
the girl came back, her annoyance rising so high that she
shifted in the chair. "Since I'm twenty-two and have been
a full sorceress for me last five years, it's nothing more
than necessary research. One must expand with one's
growth, otherwise one ceases growing."

"The witch apprentice Nedra did not achieve the plane
on her own," InThig persisted, the claws on its front feet
curiing into (he stone with a chill-making scrape. "Borinthin
the wizard sent her in and out, taking a simple payment
both before and afterward. Borinthin has always been
attracted to you; if you're determined to go through with
this insanity, why not approach him as Nedra did and. . ."

The demon's voice went on and on, but the giri had
stopped listening. She knew what Nedra had done to achieve

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER         7

me plane, but she wasn't about to do the same. The next
time she saw mat prancing, preening Nedra, she'd have
achieved the plane herself, without having had to buy any
favors. Then it would be her turn to crow.

Her eyes were still on the point of space in front of the
hearth. Seeing there not empty space, but the entry she'd
called into existence- Some entries occurred naturally and
only had to be found, and those were called gates; some,
however, needed to be created before they were available
for use, and those were the most dangerous. They gave
access to planes that had no relation to human beings in
any way, places in which humans could not long survive.
For the unSighted to go to many of those places would be
instant death, to remain there permanently in safety impos-
sible even for wizards. All the Sighted could do was visit
for a while, and that was all Laciel was going to do. She
rose from the chair in one fluid motion, stepped two
spaces forward, and was gone from me room.

Her determination carried her another three paces past
the entry into the plane on the other side, and then she
stopped in startlement and awe to look around. Everyone
had always said that that plane was indescribably beauti-
ful. but the words they'd used yere pale and flat in the face
of the actual thing. Rather than feeling dangerous the place
chimed with lovely welcome, crystal song adorning crystal
lace, colors such as she'd never seen before, shapes that
caught the eye and held it. It was filled with the breathy
whispers of lovers, the delight of small children, the inno-
cence of a wholesome heart, the dearest hopes ever to be
dreamt of; she was instantly entranced as she looked around,
her mind no longer alert for what danger there might be.
Danger was unknown in a place like that, always had been
and always would be.

The time rate of her own dimension was unknown in
that other place, but after a thousand heartbeats she was
distracted from her stroll through the overwhelming beauty
by the awareness that her lungs were beginning to labor.
The golden rose that had been bom through her desire to
see it still lay fragrantly on her palm, but its perfume was
no longer reaching her as easily as it had. She knew then
that it was time to return through the entry, and turned to

SHARON GREEN

her left to find the shadowy gate only two steps away.
Slowly and with great reluctance she took those two steps
and then the necessary third—but found her surroundings
unchanged. Chiming loveliness still lay everywhere, laugh-
ing softly in shared'happiness, and the gate shadow was
now three steps to the right. Her heart began to pound with
effort as this time she moved to the right, but once again
stepping through the gate took her nowhere but four steps
over along the singing plane. She had gone twice through
the entry and still hadn't left, and then, as fear began to
rise to accompany shortness of breath, she finally understood.

The plane was not only endlessly beautiful, it also cre-
ated its visitors* fondest wishes; it would create an image
of the entry anywhere Laciel wanted it, but none of those
images would be the real thing. It had taken two days for
the giri to See through to the actual entry, two days in her
own world. From that side a new entry would take at least
as long, but the air she had brought through with her
would last no longer than another pair of minutes.

In desperation the young sorceress began to really look
at the nearest curtain of crystal lace, fully intending to
change it into the air she needed to breathe, but under her
stare the curtain shifted, dissolved, and left behind it—
nothing. She blinked in shock, withdrawing her stare—and
me curtain glimmered back to life, resuming its place
among the other curtains and veils and trailing leaves and
tall, delicate pastel fountains. None of it was real. none of
it had substance, and she was already gasping; there was
nothing in reach with which to make the air she needed,
and the pounding in her head increased and expanded. She
was close to blacking out, she knew, close to the end with
no hope of finding her way back, and then the hand
appeared in front of her. . . .

// — Rikkan Addis

It was heavily overcast that night, and even darker in
the forests all. around them, but none of that was helping.
The small group of men had already split up and melted
away from each other in me humid dark, trying to confuse

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER         9

their pursuers, but that wasn't going to help either. They
were being tracked by the soul-leeches that had picked
them up at the castle, and soul-leeches couldn't be shaken
off- He had told them that just before he had left them,
wanting them to know just what their lies had bought them
all, and then he had slipped off into the dark, ignoring
their hissed demands that he return. A moment later they,
too, had chosen separate directions, all except the two who
had been so badly wounded they needed help to keep
moving. If they hadn't kept moving, they would have died
that much sooner.

He was a shadow among shadows as he made his way
deeper into the woods, but one that cursed silently even as
he sharpened his senses to their limit. He had been a fool
to believe those people when they'd told him they were
fighting for their freedom, a fool to let their idealistic
lectures keep him from looking around a bit more care-
iully. They'd begged him to lead them in their revolt, had
pressed their gold on him even before the attack just to
demonstrate their faith and good will, they'd wined him
and dined him and then had insisted he choose from that
group of very willing and very eager females. The time
with the girls had been pleasant enough, but if he hadn't
really believed the men needed him to help them find their
dignity as men, he never would have gotten involved. The
baron was an evil usurper, they had told him, one who
stole their young men for his army and their young girls
for his bed. He had to be stopped for the sake of every
villager in every village in the district, otherwise they were
all doomed to endless depravity.

Just before they had attacked the castle, he had accidentally
come across the real reason they wanted the baron attacked.

The night sounds of the forest had long since resumed
all around him, but suddenly a distant scream rang out,
silencing the daik-dwellers who had no desire to bring
attention to themselves. Immediately he went motionless,
his ears straining for sounds of the pursuit that had just
caught the first of his former comrades, his head up as he
tasted me messages borne upon the faint breeze, his eyes
blazing even in the smothering dark. Bronze-colored those
eyes were, dominating all of his tall, broad form, filled

10 SHARON GREEN

now with self-recrimination and self-disgust. He'd seen the
popinjay just before they'd left their camp to attack the
castle, the silk-covered fop clearly having no intention of
going with them, and had heard one of the men make
some ribald comment about die former baron's nephew.
He'd been too busy shifting the men into position to think
about what he'd seen and heard, but once the attack started
and it was too late to call it off, the truth had finally come
home to him.

He began moving soundlessly through the forest again,
this time cursing the men who had lied to him. Rather man
being a usurper the current baron was the rightful heir,
something made completely clear the moment me castle's
defenses had activated, it was the popinjay who was the
attempted usurper, and he had failed to tetl his greedy
followers that the castle itself would protect its rightful
inhabitant. The old baron's nephew had probably known
mat if the attacking force was targe enough and determined
enough at least a few of them would break through, and
had therefore decided not to mention anything else. Like
the defense that had made men go up in pretty-colored
smoke in me middle of their screaming charge. Like the
defense that made the ground open to swallow up others.
Like the ghost shapes that had flowed through the castle
walls to drink the life from any man they touched. Like me
soul-leeches that had picked up the trail of the few survi-
vors, following them away from the castle and into the
woods. No man had stayed to break into the castle, so the
popinjay had outsmarted himself. Faced with the horrify-
ingly unexpected, his surviving followers had cut and run,
leaving none to assassinate the baron for him.

A second scream came then, this time comprised of two
voices, increasing his pace rather than halting it. If he
could stay far enough ahead of the leeches to make it out
of the district, they would no longer be a danger. They
couldn't live beyond the boundaries of their own district
and they knew it, so once he was out they would not
pursue him. His night vision showed him the faint trail he
was following, helping him to move soundlessly even in
his hurry, but it simply wasn't enough. Those behind him
were moving even faster, and didn't care about how much

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER         II

noise they made. They had quarry to catch, and weren't
about to be denied.

When he heard the crashing in the underbrush he knew
he'd lost the race, but it wasn't in him to simply give up.
He stopped and spun about, knowing they'd be on him in
another minute, but he still had the time to compose
himself for a final stand. Ignoring the heavy sword hung
scabbarded at his side he stood staring back up the trail
with his eyes blazing, a blaze that quickly began to spread
to the rest of him. As the blaze spread his body changed,
his form glowing and shifting and melting, until a giant
bronze beast with dripping fangs and eager claws stood in his
place. That was another reason they'd wanted him so
badly, telling him his link-shape was the only thing that
could breech the baron's final defenses, and he'd had no
reason men to disbelieve them. His link-shape could do
quite a lot that was beyond most ordinary mortals, but it
had never before faced soul-leeches. If it had any power
over them, he would soon know.

The crashing through the underbrush turned abruptly
into forms charging at him out of the darkness, too many
to count, too many to avoid. The soul-leeches were small,
but their mouths gaped wide "with needle-pointed teeth,
their claws dripped paralyzing venom, and me pads at the
bottoms of their feet were suckers, designed to hold to
their victim until he was dead and drained. Their victim
snarled, swiped across with the claws of one giant paw and
men leaped aside, but the effort had done no more man
delay the inevitable. More than half a dozen of the bone-
white leeches lay twitching and dying, but the rest were
gathering themselves to fly at him again. He snarled his
frustrated fury and backed a step, knowing that this time
some of them would have him, knowing that the end of his
days had now been found, but just as they began to throw
themselves in his direction a hand appeared before him. . . .

/// — Targa Emmen Su Daylath

The sun was not simply hot, and was no longer far, far
above the land. She knew it had lowered itself to only a

12               SHARON GREEN

few feet above her head, and now tried determinedly to
melt her into a pool of broiled, greasy flesh. She was still
up on her feet and still moving, but her eyes had taken to
closing even as her feet trudged on, and her mind was
beginning to wander.

"Fool woman," she croaked, speaking to herself aloud
again in an effort to recapture her attention. "Found the
tracks and followed them, made sure you didn't lose them,
but didn't realize until much too late how far they'd led
you. Middle of the desert they took you,'too far out to
walk back, then killed your mount. Too smart for animals,
those animals, and now you're the one who's dead. Tribe
will starve for sure if the other hunters are the same kind
of fools, but you won't know it. Another day at least to
any kind of water, and you won't make it."

She grunted agreement with herself as her feet dragged
across the flat, sandy barren, the pain of those steps just
another thing to add to all the rest. The flaming sun bumed
down on die sand as well as herself, and walking through
it barefoot, had become agony. She could close her eyes
against the blinding glare all about, but wrapping her feet
had proven impossible. Her leather shirt had cut into wrap-
pings easily enough, but they hadn't stayed where they'd
been put. They'd fallen off when her attention had wan-
dered, and by the time she'd noticed they were far behind
her. Lack of water was doing that to her, and the heat and
the trail that she couldn't afford to lose. As long as she
kept her attention on the trail, it didn't matter whether or
not she could see it; she could feel its proper place and
therefore follow it. If once she lost that trail, though, she
knew she would never be able to find it again.

"Damn fool woman," she muttered almost silently, her
sand-dry mouth and tongue and throat refusing to produce
any more in the way of sound. "Why don't you just fall
down and give it up?"

She considered that suggestion for a minute, liking the
way it sounded, but for some reason couldn't do it. When
she fell for the final time it would be soon enough to just
lie there, so she didn't have to bother about doing it now.
Also she was a hunter, and hunters didn't do things like
that.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

13

She had been a tall, strongly-built, attractive woman
when she'd started the return trek, light brown hair and
dark brown eyes, but that had been days ago. Right then
she was fire-skinned and blistered, bent and limping as
though old, eyes closed in voluntary blindness and lips
cracked like dried-out clay. Her hair was lank and greasy
from sweat and her limbs had begun to tremble, and
suddenly she knew she hadn't been lying just to keep
herself moving- She wasn't going to make it and she was
going to die, probably right that minute. Her shuffling
advance had stopped and she couldn't get it going again,
not even if she tried forever. That was it, she knew, the
final step, and just before she fell for the last time she
opened her eyes—to see the hand. . . .

IV — Kadrim Harra

He'd spent a long time that morning just standing and
staring out a window of his palace, and no one had dared
to disturb him. The king had been moody, they knew, and
it wasn't wise to intrude on a moody king, most especially
not one who had taken his kingdom by the strength of his
sword. That sword had been hanging on the wall above his
throne for more than twenty years now, but it hadn't been
neglected or allowed to rust. When he took it down and
buckled it on there was still no one to question his actions,
not even when he got a mount and rode away from me
palace alone toward the mountains. He had never been the
sort of king who bowed to the will of others just because
they were there to advise him; his advisors offered advice
only when it was asked for, and at other times kept their
mouths prudently shut.

He was into the mountains in no time. moving quickly
through the foothills and then upward toward his favorite
thinking place, his refuge from the demands of kingship. It
took more than an hour of steady riding and climbing to
reach it, and once he did he dismounted slowly and left the
beast untethered, then walked out as far as he could. His
favorite place was a widened platform of a plateau on the far
side of the mountain, and when he stood at the edge and

SHARON GREEN

14

looked over, he could see a thousand feet and more down
to the slope below, with nothing in the way to mar the
view. He had always loved that place, which made this
particular visit no more than fitting.

"I have come for a final time, old friend," he said to
the view, letting his eyes move slowly from one side to the
other- "1 am no longer able to bear this life, and no longer
young enough to seek another. How foolish a man is to
survive all his battles, for then he becomes that most
pitiful of things, an aged warrior."

He stood silently with his gaze turned inward, remem-
bering the streaks of gray he had seen in his hair and beard
that very morning. Until then he had seen no more than the
bright red of the time of his youth, but after bending down
and having trouble straightening again, he had gone in
shock to study his reflection. The face that looked out at
him still had bright, hard blue eyes, but it was the face of a
man who hadn't seen battle for the length of his oldest
son's lifetime, for long enough for him to have grown old
without his having noticed. He had been discontented for a
long while, and had found it more and more difficult
remembering that he had conquered every foot of land he
could see from horizon to horizon, had taken it and held it
and made it his own; in the beginning the accomplishment
had been very satisfying, but after a time the satisfaction
had palled. Every year he had promised himself that the
very next year he would ride beyond what was his and
claim what others thought was theirs, but ruling his own
was chore enough, and more than enough for a man who
preferred the taking to the ruling. If he took more he
would have more to rule, and more to keep him from any
further taking.

He sighed as he thought about it and shook his head, a
big man now emptied of what had made him larger than
life. Not one city in his entire kingdom had been able to
stand against his forces when he'd first ridden in attack,
not one that could anticipate his strategy and defend against
it. That, too, had kept him from riding out again, for this
had been the largest and best defended kingdom on the
entire continent before it had fallen to him; after that, what
sport would the others be?

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

15

Now even the thought of sport made him wince, espe-
cially the sport a man should find interest in till his body
was no longer filled with breath. As he had stood gazing at
himself in the glass that morning, that devil-kitten Sheldis
had come up behind him and circled his body with her
amis, then had begun to stroke him- Rather than respond
to her as he always did, he had for the first time in his life
felt unable, the horror of which had made him send her
away. He was old, and useless, and no longer even a man;

as a king he had lately left running his kingdom to his
eldest five sons, who saw to the thing better man he ever
had. There was nothing left to do but end it entirely,
before he became a burden rather than a king.

"And before word spreads of my vanished manhood,"
be muttered, knowing he would never be able to bear the
shame of that. To need to live with shame would slay a
man, to live with shame and boredom both, far worse than
death. It was better that he end it at once, right there, in
me place he had always loved. He stood at the very edge
of the plateau, his once-strong left hand resting on the hilt
of the sword that had been his only close companion for
many long years, his eyes taking a final pleasure from the
scene he would soon become ,a part of. One last time he
sighed, a wordless farewell to all those he left behind, and
men he raised his foot for the longest stride he had ever
taken. Raised the foot and set the body to following—and
men there was a hand before him. . . .

V — Soffann Dra

The lock was so simple she scarcely paid attention to it,
getting through the door faster than she would have with a
key. It was darker inside than she had expected it to be,
but she couldn't take the time to worry about that. She
slipped inside quickly and silently and shut the door be-
hind her, then groped around trying to find something to
sit on. The man who had paid her me advance had said she
might get there before him, and if she did she was to wait.

She exclaimed in a low voice as she bruised her shin on
something hard, then discovered that the something was a

i6

SHARON GREEN

wooden stool. Beside the stool was a low wooden table,
one to match the height of the seat. She smoothed her
skirts down and sat on the stool, wondering how long she
would have to wait, knowing she would wait as long as
necessary. She had agreed to meet the man in that deserted
part of the city in the dead of night for only one reason,
the same reason that would keep her there until he showed
up- The money he'd given her for the work he wanted
done was only a small part of the ultimate total, more than
she'd ever seen at one time in all her life. With tastes as
expensive as hers, she needed all the money she could get.

She sat on the stool in me absolute blackness, one hand
unconsciously patting her dark, well-kept hair. thinking
about how much danger the job was likely to have. She'd
been told not to let anyone see her getting to the meeting
place, advice that was meant for her sake rather man his.
Whatever he needed opened had to be important, then,
probably something that didn't belong to him. She would
protect herself in the usual way before she started the job,
so if what needed to be opened happened to have the ducal
seal on it, she would not lose her life rather man getting
paid once it was done. There wasn't anyone in the city
better at opening things than she was, and maybe no one
better even on the entire continent; if anything happened to
her, uncounted numbers of things would just have to stay
closed.

She chuckled at the thought, knowing exactly how at-
tractive most men found that chuckle. It went perfectly
with her large green eyes and oval, innocent face. her
small but very well-shaped body, her throaty and ex-
tremely intimate voice. All in all her attributes had added
gold pieces to her fee more than a few times, and often
they'd even found her diversions. Some of her male clients
had been rather attractive, and those she had allowed to
buy her certain things in exchange for her favors. The
others she refused no matter what they showered her with,
also refusing to lower her standards for mere gold and
jewels. As long as there were things that needed to be
opened, she could find the necessary gold that way.

And thinking of things that needed to be opened, what
could be keeping her newest client? She shifted on the

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

I?

hard stool in discomfort, really quite surprised that he had
kept her waiting that long. It had been clear that he'd
found her as compelling as most men did. and shouldn't be
that late meeting her. She wouldn't be opening anything
that night, of course, only after they'd come to a firm
agreement and had arranged a rendezvous with which they
both felt safe and comfortable, but first he had to get
there—

She jumped up from the stool with a low gasp when she
heard the faint scrape and loud thump on the other side of
the table. Someone was there in the room with her, some-
one she hadn't even heard breathing in the dark, someone
she hadn't seen when she'd first opened me door and come
in. Unsteadily she considered saying the name he'd given
her, then simply backed slowly away toward the wall
behind her. If it had been her client he would have greeted
her as soon as she appeared, so it had to be someone else.
The fact that the sounds hadn't been repeated wasn't any-
tiling like reassuring, and she couldn't keep from shuddering.

Just as she had decided to break and run for the door, a
dim light began glowing in the middle of the low wooden
table. It wasn't a natural light such as a candle or lamp,
and it froze her in place with ifs eerie pink glow. She knew
it couldn't be anything but magic, but couldn't imagine
why magic was being used against her. She hadn't done
anything to anyone—lately—so there was really no reason—

"Girl," a soft female voice said from the strengthening
glow, a voice she had never heard before. "Did you enjoy
me gold you were given? I know you were expecting
more, but unfortunately there won't be any more. One of
the reasons is on the other side of this table."

Gingerly she edged around the glow to peer at the filthy
floor on the other side of the table, then jumped back with
a gasp. The man who had arranged to meet her there had
gotten there first—but he was dead. He lay sprawled gro-
tesquely on the floor beside a second stool, and the sounds
she'd heard must have been the sounds of his body falling
from the stool.

"He was the only one who knew of my involvement in
this," the voice continued, sounding sleek and pleased.
"In my position I can't afford to become involved, but I

118              SHARON GREEN

never fail to pay the debts I owe. Some months ago, you
opened a cream-colored leather box for a gentleman who
never gave his name. Inside the box were certain letters
and documents that shoutd have been seen by no one but
myself, and now they're in the possessidn of my husband.
You're incapable, I think, of understanding the incredible
difficulty I now have because of that, and I consider it
only fair that you be given some difficulty of your own.
To teach you. in the best way possible, not to meddle in
affairs mat don't concern you."

"But I didn't—!" she began, much more frightened
than she had been, most especially as the voice belonged
to a woman. She couldn't deal with women as easily as
she did with men, and the situation looked far from
promising.

"Ah, but you did," the woman's voice interrupted, still
calm and faintly amused. "At this time, however, I think
we can safely assume that you won't do it again. I under-
stand that you've boasted there isn't anything you can't
unlock; if yoa find yourself able to unlock yourself from
that room, I'll consider us quits. Good-bye."

The glow immediately began to die, leaving her with a
hand clutched round her heart. She would separate herself
from that room, all right, and without wasting another
minute! She turned to run toward the door, wanting noth-
ing more than to get as far away from that place as possible—
and at that moment all four walls burst into flame. She
screamed and stumbled back from the roaring sheets of
fire, fell to the floor and tried to crawl away, but there was
no place to crawl to. The heat was terrible and her lungs
already felt burned, and as she heard the faint sound of
female laughter she knew that that was one manner of binding
she never would unlock. She began coughing, knowing it
was only a matter of seconds, feeling her clothing already
beginning to smolder, and then there was a hand. . . .

VI — ZaU T'Zannu

He stood in the shadows doing more than simply listen-
ing, not only in the shadows but actually a part of them.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

19

Much of his adult and near-adult life had been spent as a
shadow, and that fact pleased him enormously. People
guarded against other people, but it was impossible to
guard against shadows.

Some parts of the castle were new, but the part he stood
m men was older than most could remember. The square
gray stone blocks all around him were covered with the
green of age and damp, and very few torches burned that
far below ground. He could hear water dripping some-
where, and a steady, distant scraping of some sort, but felt
nothing in the way of human presence near him- The level
was as deserted as he'd been told it would be, which
wasn't surprising. The earl's strongroom was three levels
up from that place, and the guard mounted on it was heavy
enough to stop a troop of cavalry. Well, they could guard
the strongroom all they liked; he was after bigger fish.

The shadows extended all the way to the old, splintered
wooden door he had been looking for, and once he'd
shouldered me thing open he paused to light a small torch
of his own. Dark was good to move through, but a man
needed light when there was delicate work to be done. He
entered the bare, stone room, closed the door behind him
and set his torch in the wall^ then began pacing out the
exact center of the room. That would be his starting point,
and it had to be as accurate as possible.

Quite a lot of time went by in pacing and measuring, but
he was far too absorbed to notice it. What he was engaging
in men was a passion inherited from his father, passed on
as undeniably as the lands and gold would be, but far less
publicly. For four generations his family had been collect-
ing legendary and/or fabulous items produced down through
me centuries, which were not readily available to the
general public. If securing them required only gold, then
gold was supplied; if securing them required more effort
man mere wealth, his family had always been willing to
supply mat as well. To say they stole would be reducing a
grand, irresistible passion to the prosaic, and he and his
family had never been that. Passion and practicality had
dictated their efforts, until me latest of their line had
proven that there was nothing he could not take, no matter
how well guarded it was.

20 SHARON GREEN

Or how intricately unguarded it was. The wall stone he
stopped in front of looked no different from any of the
others, and his gray eyes inspected it carefully before his
long-fingered hand reached out to touch it. Cautious, gen-
tle fingertips proved it also felt the same, but that meant
nothing. If the priceless relic was there, it had been there
long enough for an entire castle of stones to match up.
What he had to do next was try the combination.

After gently marking the key stone with a piece of
chalk, he backed away from the wall until he'd reached a
distance of about eight feet, then withdrew a rod from
beneath his cape. The rod was no more than a foot in
length until he began pulling on it, and then it obligingly
extended and extended and extended, until he was able to
reach the wall again without moving toward it. The rod
was light and stiff enough to produce a minimum of
waving at the far end, and he'd practiced with it so often
over the years that his touch with it was more deft than
many people were with their own hands.

"Never trust an enemy, even when he's dying,*' he
muttered, leveling the pole and beginning to press the
stone with it in a precise pattern. If a relic or a work of art
was in some contemporary's possession, it simply had to
be fiberated from whatever safeguards had been contrived
for it; if it was still where it had been originally secreted,
however, there were traps and Fiendishly deadly snares to
avoid if the searcher wanted to survive to enjoy his find.
Ramil had intended going after it himself, but their duel
had come first and had ended all of Ramil's intentions.
The dying man had told him where to find the parchment
detailing the location of me relic, and had sworn with his
last breath that there were no traps. Ramil had parted with
the information—or so he had said—because he wanted
someone with a desire equaling his own to have it; in full
truth Zail didn't believe that for a minute. Ramil had
wanted him dead, and probably had had another parchment
which detailed the traps. If he had believed there weren't any,
he would have deserved whatever happened to him.

With the last touch of the rod the stone began to sink
downward with a grinding scrape—and at the same time a
full five foot by five foot section of the stone of the floor

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER         21

dropped a good deal more quickly. Anyone standing on
(hat stone to touch the wall would have gone through the
floor, but he'd come across that kind of trap before and
had the rod to take care of it. If that was the only snare
guarding it, he would thank the gods later when he got
home.

The floor stone rose again and clicked into place, but he
was no longer paying attention to it. Even as his hands
compressed the rod back into a more manageable and
concealable size. his gaze was captured by what the sink-
tog wall stone revealed. Resting comfortably on a stone
cushion in the niche now opened to view was a scepter, one
that seemed to be made of solid gallium. The blue-white
metal gleamed even in the dim light of the single, under-
sized torch, but not quite as brightly as the huge heartfire
gem set at its end. Color flared and glowed from the
exquisitely faceted jewel in a way that hadn't been seen or
matched in centuries, and there could be no doubt as to
what relic he'd found.

"The Living Flame, scepter of Prassa the Unconquer-
able!" he breathed, hardly daring to believe it. The glori-
ous tiling had been sought for so long\ Wait until his father
saw it!                     ^

Despite his excitement he proceeded carefully, testing
(he floor before trusting it with his weight, and then study-
ing the scepter before attempting to touch it. There had to
be other traps, he knew it for a certainty, but the only
possibility occurring to him involved me stone cushion the
.scepter lay on. He had put the collapsed rod back into his
cape, but now he drew it out again with a different purpose
;ai mind. Using the rod to tap gently at the scepter, he
discovered that there were no hidden knives waiting to cut
the hand from anyone reaching into the niche. With that
routine taken care of, he held the rod behind the scepter.
reached in with his free hand for the relic, then immedi-
ately put the rod on the stone cushion in its place. His
heart pounded with elation and excitement as he stood
mere with the scepter in his hands, the relic now free of
me niche with no further traps sprung! He wanted nothing
more than to stand mere and drink in the sight of it, but

22 SHARON GREEN

that could be done once he got home. He still had to get
out of die castle undetected, and that would take time.

Once the scepter was wrapped and comfortably nestled
into his cape in the place the rod had previously been, he
took his torch from the wall and went to the door. As soon
as he had the door open he would put the torch out, and
then he would go back the same way he'd—

A heavy click came from the door when he pulled on it,
a sound he hadn't heard the first time he'd opened it.
Quick as a startled bird he jumped to one side, but nothing
else seemed to be happening. He approached the door
again being careful of the floor and ceiling stones while
also watching all around, and this time pulled harder on
the metal grip. The old wooden door should have opened
then, even if it moved no more than slowly, but it didn't
budge. He pulled again and again, his heart beginning to
hammer from something other than elation, but it was a
waste of effort. The door refused to open, and he had
nothing to force it with even if it were possible.

He turned away from the door in disgust, but more with
himself than anything else. He should have anticipated die
possibility of being locked in, and left the door open a
crack. Now he would have to wait until his father realized
that something had gone wrong, and came looking for
him. If he hadn't taken me precaution of speaking with his
father before starting out, he would have undoubtedly died
down there, with none knowing what had happened to
hmi. That level was never—

His thoughts slowed to instant stillness as he realized
he'd been hearing a sound of some sort, and it seemed to
be coming from the niche. Slowly he carried his torch back
to the wall, and saw that the stone cushion the scepter had
been resting on was sinking into the bottom of the niche.
He knew then that substituting the rod hadn't done any
good, that the difference in weight had triggered another
trap, and that was probably what had locked the door. But
if that was all it was meant to do, why was the cushion
still sinking downward—?

The answer to his question came with a loud click as the
cushion sank flush with the bottom of the niche—^and
stones on three of the four walls slid aside to reveal pipes.

THE PAR SIDE OF FOREVER

A few seconds of scraping and gurgling passed, and then
water began spewing out of the pipes, heavy streams of
water mat seemed pure and clear. An underground river
had to be feeding those pipes if mere was still water after
all those centuries, and he could see that the river in-
tended emptying itself into the room. He ran back to the
door and tried pulling on it again, then kicked it hard
before turning away. There was no way out of that room,
none at all, and me water was already up to his ankles.
His jaw tightened when he understood how few minutes he
had left, but even then he could only regret that he hadn't
taken greater precautions; as far as finding the scepter
went, he had no regrets at all.

The water quickly rose higher, and he did nothing more
than begin to swim once he could no longer stand. There
was always the chance that the level would stop before it
rose all the way to me ceiling, and even a slim chance was
worth grasping. He held the torch clear as long as he
could, until his head was being pressed into the ceiling,
and just as water slopped into his mouth and nose and
quenched the torch, he saw a hand. . . .

CHAPTER  1

The room was larger in all dimensions than it needed to
be, giving me, at least, the impression that I sat in the
house of a rustic giant. Wood paneling, decorative beams,
immense stone fireplace and upholstered log furniture sup-
plied the rustic, and a twenty-foot ceiling on a forty by
forty foot room made the giant. 1 wasn't quite sure what he
was up to, except that he seemed to want us to be relaxed
but impressed; if the others felt the way I did, he'd missed
his mark by quite a lot,

1 shifted in the chair I'd claimed in order to sit with one
leg under me, wondering again who all those people
were. I'd looked at each of them and had found that they
were real, but their life forces were resonating in a way
that said they weren't native to that world-dimension in
which they found themselves. I was native to it, but that
didn't mean I knew any more than they did.

All five of them seemed to be more wrapped up in their
own thoughts than interested in starting conversations, and
that despite the cozy circle of chairs we sat in. The chairs
stood on a large shaggy rug that was probably supposed to
look like an animal hide, and a round log table stood in the
middle of our chair-circle with two bowls of assorted fruit
on it. The main conversation-stopper seemed to be the
seventh chair in our circle, the empty, larger chair that
none of them had been able to claim. The spell on the
chair kept it reserved for whoever was coming, and al-

1A

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

25

though I could have negated the spell and taken it myself,
it didn't seem worth the trouble. The others would have
begun throwing questions at me, questions I couldn't an-
swer. 1 was feeling stupid just then for a number of
reasons, and not having those answers simply added to
it—and to my mounting annoyance. We'd been shifting
uncomfortably in those chairs for at least twenty minutes,
which in my current mood was seventeen minutes too
long- I'd waited with as much patience as I could muster,
but now the patience was all used up.

"Right now strikes me as a good time to make an
appearance," I observed to the air in the empty seventh
chair, drawing three pairs of startled male eyes and two
pairs of equally startled female ones. "If you don't agree,
I'll go home to do my waiting."

The air in the seventh chair started shimmering then,
and a figure began forming and filling to occupy the space.
To the accompaniment of a single gasp our host at long
last showed himself, and also showed mat he was still
reaching for specific reactions from us. It was hardly likely
that any of us doubted he would prove to be a wizard, so
the shape he took was unnecessary for the purpose of
supporting the point. We weie now being inspected by a
robust man who carried his many-years easily, his hair and
beard very long and dazzlingly white, his light eyes spar-
kling with gentle understanding and amusement, his long-
sleeved. electric-blue robe covering a body mat seemed
two feet taller and a foot wider than even the redheaded
boy who was one of our six. I could feel how powerful he
was without even trying, but that was no excuse for theat-
rics designed to impress the backward.

"The ever-impatient Laciel," he remarked when his
inspection moved itself to me, his smile apparently strug-
gling to keep from becoming a grin. "Since you knew it
when I came in and seated myself, I'm surprised you were
able to wait even this long. What's the matter, child?
Don't you approve of my appearance?"

"You know I don't," I answered, aware of the stir of
discomfort among the others. "1 may owe my life to you,
but that doesn't give you the right to patronize me. It's

26 SHARON GREEN

obvious I was brought here for a reason; how about getting
around to mentioning what it is?"

"Don't be upset by her abruptness of manner,'* he said
to the others, most of whom seemed embarrassed and
dismayed and flinching as well as upset. "Sorceresses tend
to be difficult to impress, especially when they have the
potential power that she does. And, of course, when they
have her impatience."

"When a king fails to find waiting beneath him. a girl
should have far less difficulty," the redheaded boy put in,
the comment half-disapproving and half-amused. He seemed
to be no more than seventeen, if that old, but his very
large body was fully developed, muscles bulging out of
arms and shoulders, thick neck corded with strength, chest
deep and wide and covered with red hair. He was bare to
his trim waist except for a wide gold band around each of
his upper arms, and from the waist down he wore supple
leather pants and boots in gray, with a wide belt of woven
gold cinching me pants. The red hair on his head was
rather long, straight and thick, but his broad face looked
too pink-cheeked to ever have been shaved. His deep voice
made it all fit together rather neatly—except for his unself-
conscious bearing and straightforward blue eyes. Some-
how, those eyes would have been more suited to a man
three times his age.

"Please believe that I appreciate your patience, Kadrim
Harra," the wizard said to the boy, sounding as though he
were speaking to an adult his own age. "All of you have
been more than patient, especially in view of the fact that
you don't know what's happened to you. The truth of the
matter is I need you six, to help with a serious problem 1
have. In return for what 1 have done for each of you, there
is a service I would like you all to perform. A dangerous
service, but no more dangerous than what you left behind."

The expressions on me faces of the others gave me the
distinct impression that I wasn't the only one who had
been about to pay for stupidity in a rather permanent way
when rescued, and me next one to speak confirmed mat.

"What I left behind me was certain death," the second
of the three men said, drawing agreeing nods from the
third man and the smaller of the two women. "If what

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

you're about to ask us to do means the same, what benefit
will there have been for us in being rescued?"

"A fair question, Rikkan Addis," the wizard allowed,
looking at the man with benevolent understanding, his
hand stroking his long white beard. The man he spoke to
was not as large as the redheaded boy, but by any other
standards he was far from small. His bronze-colored eyes
were his most outstanding feature, set off by a tanned face
and dark black hair, supported by a wide, broad-shouldered
body dressed in rust-colored leather. Shirt, pants and even
boots were rust-colored, and an intricately linked belt of
silver circled his waist. "If I were sending you on a
hopeless mission, there would have been no benefit in
your having been rescued at all," the wizard said to him,
' 'but the mission 1 have is no more than extremely danger-
ous. There's a great deal of difference between extremely
dangerous and hopeless."

"I'm really very grateful to have been given my life
back," the smaller woman interjected before the man with
the strange eyes could say anything else, drawing the
wizard's gaze to her. "I would have no objections at all to
showing how grateful, but as far as this—extremely dan-
gerous mission goes, I'm afraid I'm just not cut out for it.
Don't you think it would be much better if I stayed here,
rather man going along to be nothing but a burden?"

Her smiled warmed with the end of her question, adding
to the overall sense of extreme and eager willingness she
was projecting—along with the delicate appeal of helpless-
ness, She was smaller than the other woman and myself,
her long black hair arranged into curls and twists that
framed her angelic face. Dark lashes made her big green
eyes very visible, and her mouth was generous with pout-
ing lips of bright red. Her skin was too light for her to
have spent much time outdoors, and the delicate, long-
skirted gown of green she wore not only set off her small
but lush figure, it also matched her eyes. She seemed to
know that the wizard wasn't as old as his appearance
suggested, and she had leaned somewhat toward him as
she spoke, adding to the effect of her throaty suggestion. If
the wizard had fallen for it 1 would have walked out

28

SHARON GREEN

in disgust no matter how powerful he was, but all he did
was look at her with a sobriety she wasn't expecting.

"My dear Soffann Dra, I really do wish I could oblige
you," he said, the gentle but implacable words taking the
smile from her. "I hadn't meant to go into this now, but
since you've raised the point I might as well explain it. 1
need six people with six individual talents for my mission,
and expended a certain amount .of energy bringing mem
and keeping them here. The energy needed was greater
than you know, and I haven't any to spare above that
certain amount. If one of you isn't suited to the mission,
that one will have to be replaced with someone of equal
talent—which can be done, I'm sorry to say, only after me
original candidate has been returned to where he—or she—
came from."

The small woman's light skin paled visibly and a good
deal of fear came into her eyes, but strangely enough she
was me only one to react that way. The other woman and
me three men seemed to consider me arrangement no more
than fair, indicating mat they'd probably already decided
to pay off their life-debt in whatever way they had to. As
far as I was concerned I would have been long gone if I
hadn't also decided the same, which left the smalt woman
the only one among us who had tried to renege. She
looked around quickly to see how everyone else was tak-
ing the news, then leaned back in her chair in defeat.

"Well, if you put it like that, of course I'll go," she
said, then deliberately raised those eyes to the wizard with
another smile meant to devastate. "After all, there is no
one eke of equal talent you could replace me with."

The wizard chuckled at the woman's audacity, his reac-
tion matched with smites from the three men, but for some
reason the other woman and I weren't amused. Possibly we
weren't built right to appreciate her—wit. The general
enjoyment continued being expressed for a short while,
and then the man with me bronze eyes, Rikkan Addis,
turned to the wizard again.

"Now that we know your mission isn't hopeless and
that we'll all be going," he said, "I, at least, will appreci-
ate a few more details. Where will we be going, and for
what purpose?"

THE F^R SIDE OF FOREVER

He sat back in his chair and crossed his long legs, both
actions signs of relaxation, but I had the feeling that
something in the questions he'd asked had more impor-
tance for him than he was letting on. Before answering,
the wizard's hand went again to his beard, which I began
to believe was a sign that he was handling something of a
delicate nature. I now knew that Rikkan Addis had to be
handled, but didn't yet know why.

"Your ultimate destination is a place whose name I
know as well as the approximate position where it lies,"
the wizard answered at last, his hand still slowly stroking
his beard. "Something of great importance was stolen
from this world and taken there, and if it isn't recovered
our world here will die- 1 tried going after it myself, but
me safeguards along the trail were set with me in mind,
negating my strengths and taking advantage of my weak-
nesses- You six will have to do the task for me, and if you
succeed your rewards will be greater than you ever dreamed
possible; if you fail, a world dies with you."

"I find it best to consider only success, and let failure
worry about itself," the third man said in an easy way,
sharing nothing of the frowning silence which had taken
the others. "Will part of my^own reward be the return of
the Living Flame?"

His gray eyes rested easily on the wizard, a faint smile
making his handsome face even more attractive. He seemed
to be as tall as the man with bronze eyes who sat two
chairs away from him, but his body was a bit more slender
and graceful, and his dark brown hair curlier rather than
mane-thick. He wore a wide-sleeved shirt of white, closed
at the wrists and open to the middle of his chest, black
trousers and short black boots, with a small golden medal-
lion hung from around his neck. He looked as though
being relaxed was the only state of living he had ever
learned, and the wizard smiled as his hand stopped
beard-stroking.

"The Living Bame is, of course, yours, Zail T'Zannis,"
he acknowledged, his tone making the words a sworn
oath. "Even if you don't return for it yourself, I'll make
sure it reaches your father. Will that satisfy you?"

"Very much so," the man said with the flash of a wider

SHARON GREEN

30

smile, for some reason amused. "I'd prefer unveiling it
myself for him, but if that becomes impossible it helps to
know he'll have it anyway. Please go on with what you
were saying before I interrupted."

"What 1 was saying was mat this world is in danger of
dying,'* the wizard resumed, losing his smile again. "I
think you should know that except for Laciel, none of you
are native to this world-dimension. If this one dies your
own worlds will, for the most part, be untouched, except
for the unavoidable ripples that the dying will send through
the dimensions. The ripples can cause storms or earth-
quakes or eruptions or, in certain instances, political unrest
or out-and-out war, but nothing that your worlds won't be
able to survive. It's the people of mis world who will die if
you fail."

"I don't understand," I said slowly into the newest
silence, which was something of an understatement. He
had just lessened everyone's motivation for success but
mine, and I couldn't figure out what he was up to. "How
could this world possibly be in that much danger without
anyone knowing about it? And what could have been
stolen that would make that much of a—"

I stopped in midsentence as a chill washed over me, me
answer to my question coming even as I'd asked it. There
was only one thing that could have been taken, but I'd
always thought it was impossible!

*'I believe you understand now," the wizard said, com-
passion on his face for the stunned expression on mine.
"What was stolen was the balance stone of the Tears of
the Mist."

"And you're Graymor," I said, no longer wondering
why he'd disguised himelf in a way that kept me from
looking through. He'd needed time to build up to me
shock he'd known it would be for me, and maybe he'd
been right. But as I put one hand to my head, 1 wasn't sure
years would have been long enough.

"And I'm Graythor," he agreed gently, men sent his
gaze to the others. "Laciel knows me not only because
we're long-time acquaintances, but because she knows mat
I'm the Protector of the Tears, just as everyone on this

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

31

world does. Every century a Protector is chosen from
among the most powerful wizards then alive, and he or she
serves until the next Protector is chosen. My term of office
was nearly up when this happened, and maybe that fact
caused me to be careless; if it did, I'm more than paying
for it."

He paused a moment to look away from everyone, his
face and eyes briefly ages older than they had been, and I
doubt if anyone in the room thought the change had been
caused by magic. Most of them shifted in place with sym-
pathy or embarrassment, and their movement brought his
attention back to them.

"The Tears of the Mist keep this world stable," he said
with a sigh, straightening in his own chair. "Aeons ago
the Tears were set in place by the EverNameless to make
the world habitable and safe, and to remove them all from
their resting frame would cause its immediate destruction,
Removal of the balance stone alone, however, delays that
destruction and stretches it out, so that the breakup begins
slowly and builds toward the final destruction. For that
reason alone is there time enough to search for the balance
stone and time enough—maybe—to return it to its place.
As long as the breakup basnet gone beyond the point of no
return, it will still be able to be-stopped."

"That seems somewhat odd," the gray-eyed man called
Zail TZannis remarked, one finger rubbing thoughtfully at
his face. "If I wanted to destroy & world, I'd do it in the
fastest way possible, not in a way that would give some-
one the chance to stop me. And why would anyone want
to destroy a world anyway? Maybe the stone was simply
taken to embarrass you."

"Your objections are valid, sir," Graythor acknowl-
edged, a wry look appearing on his face under the beard.
"Right now only we in this room know the balance stone
is gone, but soon everyone will know it and wilt also know
that its loss is due to my negligence. If the matter weren't
so serious, everyone would laugh." The wry look disap-
peared to be replaced with bleakness, and Graythor shook
his head. "But me matter is indeed that serious, and once
the world begins to break up, no one will have the time or

SHARON GREEN

die heart to laugh. They'll all know they're facing death,
and only those with the power will be able to escape it.''

"But if you have time before it happens, why can't you
just move everyone somewhere else?" the small woman,
Soffann Dra, asked, her pretty brow creased in thought.
"That way it won't matter what happens to this world."

"My dear young woman, there are uncounted millions
of people living on this world," the wizard answered,
trying not to show how ridiculous the question was. "There
aren't wizards enough to move even a quarter of them,
which means there would have to be those who were left
behind. Would you want to be the one to decide who will
live and who will die? Without knowing good from evil,
kind from vicious, intelligent from retarded, industrious
from hanger-on? Would you take them at random, first
come first served, encouraging them to trample each other
in their desperation to get to safety? Would you have them
first fight and kill each other, and then take only the
survivors? The decision would be one many would find
fascinating, but I'm not quite up to fascination of that
sort."

"Then the thing was done by an enemy of yours, rather
than of this world's," said Kadrim Harra, the red-haired
boy who continued to sound so unboylike. "As Zail
T'Zannis has said, one who desired the destruction of a
world would see to mat destruction with the utmost possi-
ble speed. As the choice of speed was possible yet disre-
garded, agonizing anticipation must be the true reason for
the act. To know of the coming destruction and yet be
powerless to halt it, must truly cause unbearable pain for
you."

"No more unbearable than the rending of my soul,"
Graythor said, his face now expressionless, his gaze aimed
inward, his hands curled in silent fury around the arms of
the chair. "Yes, the one who did this is an enemy of mine,
one who knew how I would take it. Millions of people,
knowing me responsible for the safety of the Tears, will
die cursing my name with their last breath. Those who are
able to breech the dimensions will do so, taking knowl-
edge of my infamy with them and spreading it as far as
there are ears to hear, eyes to read, fingers to sign, minds

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

33

to merge. If that was simply the payment demanded for the
survival of this world I would gladly make it, but mat
simple an expiation will not be allowed me. I have no
choice other man to die with those people whose death I
caused, or live on in safety in another dimension, remem-
bering what it was I left behind me. Death, of course,
would be the far better choice, but there are those else-
where who also depend on my survival for their own-
Most likely I'll find that I've been given no other choice
than to live on and remember."

"Or to end the horror before it begins," said the bronze-
eyed man, Rikkan Addis, in the hardest voice I'd ever
heard, his eyes glowing with fury. "I don't need to know
what sort of monster would kill a world full of people just
to hurt a single individual; all 1 need to know is where that
monster is so that I can find it. What do we have to do?"

Graythor looked around at the circle then, his face
lightening with the beginnings of hope, and every face
looking back at him reflected Rikkan Addis* statement of
challenge. They were all pledging themselves to him with-
out reservation, and from that pledge the strength flowed
back into him as though it had never left. His hands slowly
uncurled from the chair arms, and a smile of silent thanks
creased his face as he nodded again.

"The first part of what you must do is simple," he
said, his voice now filled with relief and enthusiasm.
"You all must follow the trail of the balance stone across
the dimensions, to the place where it was taken and is now
being kept. The stone leaves a—a—spoor, I suppose you
could call it, wherever it happens to pass, one that Targa
Emmen Su Daylath won't have any trouble following. The
rest of you will simply follow her."

All eyes suddenly went to the only one of us who hadn't
yet spoken, the big woman who sat next to me. Targa
Emmen Su Daylath smiled a faint, unself-conscious smile
di the attention, but still didn't say anything. She had dark,
calm eyes in a face mat was pleasant rather man pretty,
very long, light brown hair worn straight back and held
high in a flowing tail by a ring of bone, a yellow leather
shirt that was fringed all over, and a wide, yellow leather

SHARON GREEN

34

breech that was held close to her body by the thin string of
leather knotted around her waist. Her legs and feet were
entirely bare, but she didn't seem to be self-conscious
about that, either.

"Once you reach your destination, the best way in will
either be found or devised by Kadrim Harra," Graythor
continued, now sending everyone's eyes to the redheaded
boy. "It will also be his job, with others of you, to guard
against unexpected physical attack with weapons. Once
inside, you will find many locks and closings which will
require the talent of Soffann Dra to open; when she does,
Zail T'Zannis will then be able to take the stone from its
remaining safeguards. Laciel will take you all through the
dimensions to reach your destination, as well as guard you
against magic. Rikkan Addis will be in charge of the
expedition, and will organize the efforts of the group as a
whole. Tonight, after dinner, I'll give you what few details
I've been able to gather, and you'll leave in the morning.
Are there any questions?"

With the promise of details to be given later, no one felt
me urge to ask questions that might prove to be unneces-
sary. Graythor nodded with satisfaction, then rose from his
chair.

"I'm sure you could all use some time to rest and
refresh yourselves before dinner," he said, raising one
hand. "As each of you passes me, I'll attach a thread
which you may follow to the room assigned to you. Just
go through that doorway to the right, and up the stairs
you'll find beyond it. If you need anything, ring for a
servant."

They filed past him one at a time to get their threads,
then trailed out of the room in the same individual way
they'd sat in it. I followed them with the Sight until they
were all upstairs, then turned back to look at Graythor.
The wizard was sitting in his chair again, both hands over
his face and eyes, and I couldn't keep quiet any longer.

"Now that they're gone, I want the truth," I said, the
words as harsh as I could make them. "I want to know
what happened, and why you can't go after the stone
yourself."

"You've grown since the last time I saw you, Laciel,"

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

35

he said with a sigh. dropping his hands to send a benign,
light-eyed gaze toward me. "You're much larger and pret-
tier now, but not a millimeter more tolerant. I suppose
tolerance comes with greater age than you've yet achieved."

"Tolerance my—foot!" I snapped, running thin on pa-
tience that hadn't been very thick to begin with, letting my
fists find my hips. "It isn't possible for anyone to have
stolen mat balance stone, and even more impossible for
anyone to keep you from following to take it back. You're
the strongest wizard alive, Graythor, except for those who
were Protectors before you, and they don't count. Protec-
tors are made incapable by the Tears themselves of touch-
ing the Tears to do harm! There is no one who could keep
you from reclaiming the stone, so why haven't you gone
yourself?"

"I can't tell you," he said, and the way he looked
directly at me showed a hint of the strength he was capable
of. "There are things you're not yet ready to leam, young
lady, and that's one of them. Since 1 know without a
single doubt that if/ go I'll fail, you six will have to do me
job for me. Are you afraid you won't be able to succeed?"

"This is too important not to succeed," I answered with
me scorn I felt, folding my arms in annoyance. "Unlike
you, I'm convinced 1 could do it alone, which wouldn't be
a bad idea. I have the sort of motivation you made sure to
remove from the others. While I'll be picturing all the
untalented people I know dying slowly in terror, they'll be
picturing the same thing happening to nothing but a bunch
of strangers."

"You think I could have made them believe they were
striving for their home dimensions?" he asked, those eyes
still locked to me. "That might have been possible for a
short time, but what would have happened once they
began talking to each other and exchanging information?
They all come from the same continent in their respective
dimensions; what do you think would have happened when
they found that the geography matched but nothing else did?
They're not stupid, Laciel, and it wouldn't have taken
them long to discover that they all came from different
places. Once that happened, they'd begin to wonder what

36               SHARON GREEN

else I'd lied to them about, and the expedition would start
falling apart. Getting the stone back will take all of you—
despite your own opinion to the contrary—and that means
keeping you all together."

"You're still hiding something, I can feel it," 1 mut-
tered, trying to match the look 1 was getting. "And that
goes beyond the questions you've flatly refused to answer.
And what's this nonsense about that Rikkan Addis being
leader of our expedition? Magic users lead expeditions,
and you know it."

"Not this time," he denied, shaking his head with just
the hint of amusement behind his eyes- "There are too
many components of that group who would refuse to
follow you no matter how strong a sorceress you are, and I
can't repeat often enough how important it is that the
group stay together. Rikkan Addis is more than just a
natural leader; I know you couldn't feel that part of his
talent working because it didn't affect you, but it was his
belief that the task needed doing that swayed the others.
He doesn't just lead, he makes people follow, and that's
why he's so valuable."

"So that's why you were handling him so carefully," I
said, my eyes narrowing as I thought about it. "You
knew if you were able to convince him, die others would
follow along. And if he thought you were lying, the others
would believe the same. But that doesn't explain the mas-
querade. If he finds out what you really look like, won't
he consider that the same as lying?"

"Laciel, girl, the—masquerade, as you call it, wasn't
done for him," Graythor said with a sigh as he leaned
back in his chair, but whether the sigh was one of weari-
ness or exasperation, I couldn't tell. "It so happens that as
soon as you stop pestering me, I'll be calling on Rikkan
Addis to chat—and incidentally show him what I really look
like. He already knows from your earlier comments that
this isn't my true form, and I don't want him to begin
wondering."

"If you didn't want him to begin wondering, you
shouldn't have gotten involved with silly dress-up to begin
with," 1 said, now knowing what his sigh had meant. "I

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

37

know people have certain prejudices about wizards, but
that doesn't mean you have to cater to them."

"If you're asking them to risk their lives for you, mat's
exactly what you do have to do," he said, the snap in his
voice and sharpness in his eyes clear indications of how
close to anger he was. He looked to his right and my left,
spoke the words that were necessary, then joined me in
watching the chairs that stood there change immediately
into a tall, wide mirror in an intricate frame of gold. The
mirror showed me just as I was, tall and slender, tanned
and violet-eyed with long platinum hair, my pale rose shirt
and light gold slacks loose enough to keep from emphasiz-
ing my figure, my short, soft leather boots of gold more
for comfort than durability. The image of me was clear
and accurate, but so was the image of a still-seated
Graythor—which didn't match the form in the chair. Beard-
less, dark of hair and eye, sallow complexion, short, nar-
row, bent just a little but still extremely competent-looking—
that was the Graythor I knew, and the one I would have
recognized.

"Try to imagine yourself one of the others, child," he
said with less of the anger showing, the mirror-gesture 1
saw reflecting me movement only just visible from me
corner of my eye- "Your life has just been saved by
someone who is a very powerful wizard, and in return for
saving your life, he's asking you to risk it again on his
behalf. People are strange, Laciel, and after you've lived
among them for as long as I have, you'll leam that their
gratitude for an important favor can quicldy turn to resent-
ment over being forced into a position to need to return
that favor. One of die most important points in that is just
exactly who you owe the favor to—and now you're one of
mem and looking at me as I really am. What do you see?"

"I see—you," 1 answered, having no idea what he was
getting at. "What else is there to see?"

"What there is to see is that you've known me too
long," he said, for some reason with a pleased chuckle,
his true image smiling the crooked smile I'd so enjoyed as
a child. "What the others would see would be a mis-
shapen, ugly little man who really shouldn't have been
accorded the privilege of saving their lives, one who wasn't

38               SHARON GREEN

at all up to deserving their gratitude. Consciously they
would never want to feel that way, but deep inside, where
emotion rules in place of thought, they would have no
choice. My altered shape gave them nobility and wisdom
to admire, size and strength to respect, power and age to
be in awe of—and a tragic figure to sympathize with and
help. My saving their lives is now incidental; what matters
most to them at this point is that they have it within (heir
power to help someone who would normally need no help,
but who now requires their help. They're motivated, some-
thing even an enslavement spell could not accomplish, and
they'll see the job through to the end. All we have to take
care of now is that single, important question buzzing
around in your head."

"What question?" I asked at once, looking at him
sharply—but at the real him, the one in the mirror. "What
other question do you think 1 have?"

"Laciel, I've known you since you were a very little
giri," he said, the dark eyes in the mirror staring at me
with a sober calm. "You did something foolish and nearly
died for it, and now you're wondering if mat's the real
reason you're not leading the expedition. You're also
wondering what you'll, have to do to prove how capable of
leadership you are after all, and that most likely before you
all leave tomorrow. I'm telling you now that there's noth-
ing you can—or had better—do to change the arrange-
ments of this expedition as they stand, or you'll find
yourself tied so fast and deep into an obedience spell that it
will take you a year to See your way out of it. I need you
badly for this task, but you cannot do it akme, and you
cannot be me leader. Do you understand what I'm saying
to you?"

"Of course I understand," I answered with exasperated
impatience, making no effort to avoid his eyes. If I couldn't
do anything before we left then it would have to be after,
but one way or another it had to be done. Magic users
were the leaders of expeditions, and it would be stupid to
allow any other precedent to be set. Besides, I knew I
would make a better leader than that Rikkan Addis, espe-
cially for so important an objective.

"Good," he said with a nod of satisfaction, raising one

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

39

hand in a vanishing gesture to get rid of the mirror before
rising from me seat. Without the mirror there was nothing
but his altered form, which I had to look way up at. "I can
see now there's a good deal of truth to the saying about
clouds and silver linings," he observed with a smile as he
put one giant but gentle hand to my face. "If I hadn't been
scanning around in my search for members of the expedi-
tion, I never would have come across your entry onto the
Plane of Dreams—or known what was happening. If you'd
died I would have missed you, Laciel; after all, who would
be left then who would criticize me as you do?"

"Don't worry. Uncle Graythor, I'll always be around to
criticize you," 1 assured him pleasantly, recognizing the
teasing even if the face and form weren't familiar. "Since
everyone else is too afraid of you to do it, the job has to
be mine."

"So it does," he agreed with a chuckle, turning to lead
the way out of the room. "Your accommodations are
marked with a blue door, and you'll have no trouble
finding mem. While you're resting you might consider
cutting down some on all that courage you're so filled
with. Where you're going, a bit of prudent cowardice will
likely serve you better."

"That's right, you did say you knew our ultimate desti-
nation," I realized aloud, looking'up at him again as we
walked. "You make it sound like we have no chance
against it, but if we had no chance at all, you'd be wasting
your time and our lives by sending us. What's me name of
this deadly-dangerous repository of stolen articles?"

"The place you have to find an entrance into is called
Cloud's Heart," he answered, bending a much less-benign
gaze on me than he had a moment earlier. "Despite its
name it is deadly dangerous, probably as much so as the
journey you'll have getting there. I've never made me trip
myself, but I've spoken to one or two who have, and
nothing conceivable would ever get them to try it again. I
wish I could send someone in your place, Laciel, but I
can't. Just remember that, if—when you get there."

"But where is it?" I asked, disturbed by the haunted
look in the eyes that had left me. Graythor had stopped to
stare straight ahead, and that bothered me more than any-

SHARON GREEN

40

thing he had said. He hesitated so long I thought he wasn't
going to answer, and then he sighed with his gaze still held
by the distance.

"It's on the Far Side of Forever," he said in a whisper,
then strode away so fast that I had no hope of catching up.
Not that I felt like catching up. I just stood there for a
minute staring at the giant mstic dining room he'd disap-
peared through, then went looking for the accommodations
I suddenly felt a lot of need for.

CHAPTER 2

The sun wasn't up very high when I went outside the next
morning, but there's something about sunlight after hours
and hours of candlelight that makes you want to squint and
go back indoors. Much as I would have enjoyed it I had no
time for going back indoors, so 1 went instead to the group
of hprses and people who waited in the middle of the
squarish, rustic yard. Giant-sized, squarish, rustic yard.
Leave it to Graythor to be consistent even outdoors.

' "You look as though you had little in the way of rest,
girl," the redheaded Kadrim Harra remarked as I reached
for the only unclaimed set of reins in sight, which tied a
big gray to the hitching post the boy stood beside. His own
mount was an even bigger golden palamino, and the stal-
lion danced with excess energy and an eagerness to be
away. The other four were involved in a discussion which
seemed to be centered around Soffann Dra, which some-
how wasn't very surprising.

"1 had no rest at all," I told the boy without looking at
him, getting more enjoyment out of the sight of the beauti-
ful gray horse that was to be mine for a while. He snorted
softly with pleasure when he saw he wasn't to go un-
claimed after all, and lowered his nose so that I might
stroke it. "I'll catch up on what I need when we stop
tonight."

"When we left one another after the discussion last
darkness, we were all bidden to rest ourselves well," the

41

SHARON GREEN

42

boy said from my left, his deep voice beginning to fill with
disapproval again. "Though you gave the wizard little of
the respect due him with your words, surely you were not
so foolish as to disobey his commands as well? We mean
to ride far and hard this day, and one who is weary will
have difficulty in keeping up."

"You're worrying about my being able to keep up?" I
asked with a snort of ridicule, finally turning my head to
look at him. "If I were you, little boy, I'd spend my time
worrying about myself instead of the adults around me,
especially an adult who also happens to be a sorceress.
And if I'd wasted my time sleeping instead of learning the
spells Graythor wanted me to leam, there might have come
a time when you and the others had trouble keeping up
with life. Aren't we ready to leave yet?"

By the end of my speech he was blinking at me with
surprise and a very becoming silence, then turned to see,
as I already had, mat our four companions had ended their
discussion in favor of mounting. Before he could turn back
to me I walked the few steps to the gray's side, got my left
foot into the stirrup, then pulled myself up to the saddle.
The gray waited until I was firmly seated with both feet in
the closed stirrups before beginning to dance like me
palamino, and that left only the boy who wasn't ready to
go. For some reason he grinned up at me with a lot of
amusement before turning to his own mount and leaping
onto the giant beast without using the stirrups at all. The
only thing he'd used to help him had been his hands on the
pommel, but before he could start bragging about how
athletic he was. a different voice came to us across the
yard.

"It's true!" Soffann Dra exclaimed in delight from
where she cantered slowly around us, left hand on reins,
back straight but easy, wide-skirted green gown spread out
over the saddle of her beautiful white horse. "He's really
done it! I've never so much as been on a horse before, but
I can ride as though I've done it all my life! The wizard
has given me the ability to ride!"

Zail T'Zannis and Rikkan Addis grinned at the girl's
delight and enthusiasm, but Targa Emmen Su Daylath was
too distracted to do more than smile. The big woman's

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

43

attention kept being drawn to the road leading out of the
yard, and a minute later she was following that road on the
big paint horse she sat with accustomed ease. Soffann Dra
quickly followed after her with the clear intention of catch-
ing up, which drew the two men in her wake. Since it was
clear Graythor wasn't going to be coming out for any last
good-byes I took my own turn at following, and the red-
headed boy brought up the rear.

The gray's gait was smooth and easy, his response
immediate to the lightest touch of my heel, the least
movement of the reins. We moved up the road in ground-
eating strides, the early morning sparkling around us,
Graythor's giant-house shrinking into the distance. To ei-
ther side of the road were green and flowered fields for at
least a mile, with nothing but trees rising in the near and
far distance, nothing of houses even of normal size. The
air was still comfortably cool that early in the day, but I
could feel that once the sun rose higher the heat would do
the same. The road was heading us toward woods which
would surely help for a while, but the woods were unlikely
to last forever.

"You must forgive me, lady, for having spoken to you
as I did," a voice came fronnny right, deep and smooth
and at least trying to be conciliatory. "I had not realized
that your weariness came from laboring on our behalf, and
I would offer my apologies for having given you insult."

The red-haired Kadrim Harra had brought his palamino
up beside my gray, and he really did seem to be sorry for
what he'd said. I glanced over at him where he sat his
mount looking down at me, and simply shook my head.

"I wasn't insulted," I grudged, wishing I could find
more pleasure in the beautiful day all around us. "It's just
that this quest is so important to me, so important to
everyone of this world—I'll do anything I have to to see
that it turns out right, and losing a night's sleep is so
unimportant an anything—1 didn't mean to imply that you
weren't one of us because you're not as old as we are—
You're not really all that young—"

My stumbling explanation finally ran out of steam, just
as it usually did when I tried to tell people why I'd done as
I had. I couldn't quite understand why 1 was bothering to

44

SHARON GREEN

explain things to a boy who was probably too young to
comprehend what I was saying, but rather than looking
blank, another glance showed him smiling.

"Your concern is natural and understandable," he said
in a way that was supposed to be soothing, his tone
brushing aside any insult on his part. "Were it my people
who were in jeopardy, I, too, would be difficult to speak
with. Have you any further knowledge of the worlds to be
traveled through than that which was given us by the
wizard?"

"Unfortunately, no," I answered, watching a small flight
of birds lazing through the early morning air. "There are
too many gates and too many choices at each gate for any
one person to know them all, even if they've lived as long
as Graythor has. I haven't lived nearly as long, and don't
even know me two worlds he was sure of. I can see I
should have traveled more."

"Even should one attempt to live one's life anticipating
difficulties, one would still be caught by the surprise of the
unanticipated," he said, those steady blue eyes putting
surprising weight behind the statement. "Your power is
meant to guard and assist us through these worlds, a thing
we are sure to find of great benefit, yet are those of my
own world largely unfamiliar with me doings of magic.
What are these—spells—which were taught you through
the darkness, and in what manner will they be of aid to
us?"

"What I learned was a special group of protective spells
designed to guard us from magical attack," I explained,
privately wondering how anyone anywhere could be unfa-
miliar with magic. "One of the spells creates a large.
invisible sphere around us which will keep anything of a
magical nature out. Another of the spells builds a wall of
the same kind, a third a platform which will also raise us
into the air, and the rest are of the same sort. For anything
nonmagical in nature, I already have the necessary de-
fenses. What took so long was memorizing the details of
spells mat work against other spells, which means I'm
practically working without the Sight. I won't be able to
See if I'm constructing them properly against what's com-
ing at us, so I can't afford to forget the least little—"

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

45

The frown on his face made me break off the explana-
tion, telling me it wasn't explaining anything at all to him.
Just what part he wasn't getting was another question,
though, as I found out when he shook his head.

"1 have no knowledge of what sight you speak of, nor
do I understand what difference there might be between
spells," he said, looking as though not understanding
annoyed him- "Are you able to say in what manner /
would need to labor in order to leam what you have?"

"But you couldn't leam it, not unless you had the
Sight," I protested with a laugh, then understood how
much he was actually missing. "Maybe I'd better start
from the very beginning, and explain it to you that way.
People are born either with the Sight or without it, and if
they're without it they can never learn to do magic no
matter how hard they try. You can't have just a little bit of
the Sight, you either have it or you don't. Are you with me
so far?"

His nod was definite despite his silence, and for some
reason I had the feeling that he was keeping himself from
making a comment. That unwavering blue gaze seemed to
be just a little put out, but I couldn't imagine why.

"Now, if you have the Sigh^you have the ability to do
magic, but the keys to real power are how much strength
you can bring to bear, and how complete your control is of
the things around you. If we were standing together some-
where and you began to walk away when I didn't want you
to, I could reach out a hand to grab your sleeve to stop you
physically. How well I did stopping you would depend on
how good a grip I had on your sleeve; a light or badly
placed grip would be one you could pull away from, but a
strong, full, sure grip would keep you from getting very
far. Have you got that?"

"indeed," he said with a faint smile, and then the smile
widened. "And yet do I believe that my halting would
require one with hands less slender and considerably more
powerful than yours. Even had I a sleeve which might be
grasped."

"That was just an example," I told him patiently, half
expecting his remark. Boys always have to be so—ignorant—
about everything. "With magic, the way to get a firm,

46 SHARON GREEN

sure grip on something is to See it clearly and in detail, the
more detail, the better the grip. At the same time you must
describe what you're Seeing, since it's that description and
the strength you exert mat gives you power over what you
See. If someone has a red hat, people without the Sight
will see nothing but a red hat; people with the Sight,
however, will See the exact shade of that color, me exact
shape of die hat itself, the thickness of the material the
thing was made from, the strands or layers involved, all
the way down to the smallest mote mat's a part of that hat.
Seeing it lets them describe it, and describing it gives
mem power over it. Spells are the verbal description of
what someone with the Sight Sees."

"These spells, then, must be complex indeed," he said,
back to frowning in an attempt to understand. "Even to
describe what / am able to see of a thing would be
complex, and never have I been able to see to the core of
an object."

"Not all spells are that complex," 1 corrected, pleas-
antly surprised that he seemed to be following my explana-
tion. "If the details needing to be described had to be
spoken in this language, it would take hours simply to
describe enough of that red hat just to lift it in the air. The
language used for spells is sort of a—short-cut code, I
suppose you might say—that lets you describe hours' worth
of detail in only one or two words. If I wanted to change
that hat instead of simply lifting it, my description of it
would have to be a lot more detailed so that I had more
power over it. A spell like that could run five or six words,
depending on just what change I wanted to make. And, of
course, some descriptions can be added to with gestures
rather than words. There are a lot of different getures, all
standing for different things, and that's where the old
saying comes from. You know. the one that goes, 'One
gesture is worth a thousand words.' "

"That adage is more familiar to me in another form,"
he muttered, clearly trying to decide whether or not to be
impressed. His big hand rubbed at his face as his mind
worked behind distracted eyes, and men his attention was
mine again. "Then all those with the—the Sight—have
power over that which is about them. Why is it, then, that

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

47

some have more power than others? For what reason was it
necessary that you leam—spells—from the wizard which
your own—Sight—should have found it possible to give
you?"

"I think I'll answer the first part of your question
first," I said with a smile, really pleased with how bright
he was. He was having trouble with unfamiliar phrases,
but he wasn't using them wrong. "Some with the Sight
have more power than others for a variety of reasons, one
of which is how long they've lived. The longer you study
it, the easier the language of spells becomes, and the easier
it becomes, the more power you can exert over what
happens to be around you. Also, you've learned to See
things in greater and greater detail, which gives you more
to describe, which in turn gives you more power over
them. You have to leam how to look at things, you know.
in magic as well as in anything else. To someone who
didn't know about hats, our red hat would be nothing but a
red hat. To a maker of hats, though, it would be of such
and such a style, that color and this shape, individually
dyed or batch dyed, stitched or woven, made by someone
with skill or without, old and well worn or new and
unfaded- There's so much to know about things that the
amount is incredible, and some people with the Sight are
too lazy to leam it all. That's where a lot of them run into
trouble.''

"I do believe I would dislike trouble of that sort," he
said, a reluctant but definite admission. "Of what does
their dereliction consist?"

"Well, some of them tend to be the sort to believe that
any hold at all on a sleeve is enough to stop the person
wearing the sleeve," I said. "They describe as little of the
thing they're looking at as possible, exerting only a tenu-
ous hold over it, then try to make it do what they want.
Sometimes they're successful, usually they're only half
successful, and sometimes it doesn't work at all. They're
the ones who are too lazy to really leam me language of
spells, but mere are some who don't have the brains for it.
All the stupid ones can do is leam one or two very simple
spells, and then spend the rest of their lives coasting on the
reputation of being a witch or a magician. The real trouble

48               SHARON GREEN

comes when one of the stupid or lazy tries to do something
beyond them. They establish a weak or useless hold on
some dangerous entry, for example, then either get sucked
into it or let out things that don't get along with our kind
of life. It's pure hell getting a mess like that straightened
out again, especially if they happen to get sucked in and
leave the entry behind them. People without the Sight
can't See the entry, and end up getting sucked in right
behind the bungler."

"To disappear forever from the world they know," he
said with a shudder he made no attempt to hide. "Truly is
there a dark side to this thing called magic."

"Only if you go at it stupidly," I said, looking around
at the cool, green woods we were just entering. "There are
some people, without the Sight, who make a wrong dis-
tinction between white magic and black magic. They don't
understand that the Sighted arc otherwise no different from
me unSighted, some bright, some stupid, some decent and
some warped by something inside them. What the warped
try to do is use magic to advance themselves according to
their own peculiar values, but they try to do it in a way
that doesn't match reality. They See what me rest of us
See, but the vision doesn't suit them so they try to tell
themselves they're Seeing something else. When they be-
gin describing that something else in a spell, the spell and
me reality don't quite match up, but they're using very
precise language that brings them a lot of power. We've
discovered that that power—changes—the reality of what
the warped one is looking at, but not the way normal magic
changes things. To change something into something else
is easy, but only if you have a sure grasp of what that
something is to begin with; you're accepting its reality and
working from there. To alter that reality to begin with is
not black magic but something else entirely, and the sub-
stance for the change has to come from somewhere other
than thin air. The only place for the substance to come
from is the warped one's own body, and that's where it
does come from. They force reality to change to their view
of it, but pay a terrible price for the accomplishment.
Every use of that kind of power diminishes them, but most

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

49

of them won't admit it until mere isn't enough left of them
to save."

We were both silent for a while after that, the darker
woods a fitting backdrop for the dark subject we'd been
discussing, the happy chirps and squawks and chitterings
all around both incongruous and at the same time warm-
ing. Physical dark can never be as bad as the dark of the
mind, and after the while passed Kadrim Harra took a deep
breath of the sweet air we rode through.

"And the spells which you spent me darkness learn-
ing?" he said, bringing his attention back to me. "As
spells are merely descriptions of that which you see, for
what reason did you need to leam of what is not yet before
you?"

"The purpose of speaking a spelt is to gather power
over the thing you're describing," I said slowly, trying to
keep from confusing him. "If I can See something I can
describe it in the language of spells, and if I speak the
spell I have power over it. The problem is, although I can
feel the power someone has or has used by speaking a
spell, I can't See the spell itself—at least, not most spells.
If I can't See a spell sent to attack us, I can't defend
against it, nor can even the strongest wizard alive. The
only thing i can do is leam certain general defensive
spells, which describe conditions rather than solid objects.
Developing those spells took a lot of time and a lot of
dangerous work by very powerful wizards, and they must
be learned exactly right or they won't work—or, worse
than that, they'll work wrong. I could build us a house in
the middle of these woods right now without any trouble at
all, but I've Seen houses and can speak the spell without
the least danger. UnSeen spheres and platforms and things
are another matter entirely, so you can be sure I won't use
those spells unless I absolutely have to."

"A wise precaution," he agreed with a distracted nod,
again thinking about what he'd been told. "No man of
sense will use an untried and undependable weapon, save
that his life hinges upon that use. These spells of protec-
tion which were taught you—the wizard spoke them to you
so that you would know them? Over and over till they
were yours?"

SHARON OREEN

50

"Of course not," I answered with a laugh, seeing it
would take some time before he absorbed all the details of
what magic was about. "If Graythor had spoken the spells
he would have invoked them, and then we would have
spent the night surrounded by invisible spheres and walls
and platforms. He had me leam them from his red
Grimoire."

The blank look I got then made me feel annoyed with
myself, mainly for forgetting how little he knew about
magic, but also for the tiredness that was weighing me
down. I'd need to gather strength and alertness before the
morning was even half over, something I hadn't thought
would be necessary quite so soon. Maybe I was getting to
be older than I thought.

"A Grimoire is a book of spells, and each wizard puts
together his or her own," I explained, tossing my head to
get the hair back over my shoulders. "Some of them are
like Graythor's, simply written in the language of spells to
be used by anyone with the Sight, but some are more
involved- Spells that are written down deal with things that
can't be Seen, and not all wizards are willing to share the
work of decades with anyone who comes along. Those
wizards disguise their spells to look like this language
rather man the language of spells, and need a key before
they can be read as spells. Those are usually also red
Grimoires, but sometimes the same is done for safety
purposes with black Grimoires."

Again the blank look, but this time I was expecting it.
Maybe it was lack of sleep rather than age after all.

"There are two kinds of spells concerning the unSeen,"
I said, this time consciously noticing that the two men
ahead of us were glancing back to make sure we were still
with the group. Rikkan Addis had done that a few times
before, but then he did still consider himself leader of our
expedition. "The first set of spells are like the ones I've
learned, ones that have been developed and made reason-
ably safe by wizards of power, spells that will work right
if they're spoken right. The second kind of written spells
are ones that aren't safe at all, ones that are speculation
and have never been tried, ones that are tried but for some
reason don't always do what they're supposed to, and ones

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

51

that seem absolutely simple and safe, but will kill or erase
anyone who uses mem. Spells like that are black magic,
and are kept in black Grimoires, to let everyone know
what they are, and to be in a handy place where they can
be studied and tinkered with by any wizard who's grown
tired of living. I don't ever expect to get that tired of
living."

"Nor I,*' he said with a chuckle, also having noticed
the attention from ahead, but making no effort to hurry us
into closing the gap we'd let grow. "Life, I believe, is
meant to be filled with enjoyment till it ends of its own
self. At dinner last darkness, the wizard disallowed discus-
sion upon the point of our former lives. Think you he
meant the ban to continue for all of this journey?"

"If that's what he'd wanted, he would have said so," I
answered with a shrug, wondering why he would ask that,
"Or he would have used a spell to be sure no one could
talk about themselves. Is there something about yourself
that you wanted to say?"

"At the moment, no more man that 1 am a king in my
own world," he said, his smile faint beneath those steady
blue eyes. "It was you I wished to speak of, to learn what 1
might of one who deals so easily with that which others
are unable to touch. Surely the power comes to you more
swiftly and easily than to others."

"The power only comes to those who work hard for it,"
I said with just a small sound of ridicule, remembering he
didn't really know about magic. "I've spent the last ten
years slaving away studying with my foster mother, who
was a wizard long before she ever found me. A wizard and
a slavedriver, but if there's one particular reason I'm a
sorceress now, she's it. She didn't have to take me time
away from her own studies but she did, and always let me
know how much she enjoyed it and how proud she was of
me. I owe her more than I'll ever be able to repay."

"She must truly be a great woman," he said, somehow
sounding as though he, a boy, was giving her, a wizard,
an approval she might not ordinarily be entitled to. "You
say that she is your foster mother, and that you were a
foundling? Who, then, are the people of your blood?"

*'It would be interesting to know," I muttered, moving

SHARON GREEN

52

my eyes to the long gray mane bobbing in front of my
hands. "My earliest memory is of the streets of Geddenburg,
sleeping in deserted shacks, eating garbage, and begging
coppers with me rest of the kids who lived in the alley-
ways with me. I spent years among the street folk, eventu-
ally moving up, like all the others in our pack, to stealing,
but I wasn't very good at it. Morgiana caught me with a
hand in her purse, tripped me with a spell before I could
run far enough to lose myself in the crowds or alleys, then
dragged me home with her. She'd known immediately
that I was one of the Sighted, and wasn't about to let me
disappear back into the gutter. As close as she could tell I
was about twelve years old then, tall and thin and raggedy
and filthy, and stubborn as a brick wall. I've always
wondered where she found the patience to put up with
me."

"Clearly she was able to see the woman you would
become," he said in a way mat let me know those eyes
were still on me. "Tall and slender, well-shaped and
lovely, strong as well as powerful. Had 1 a sleeve, perhaps
I would not escape as easily as 1 had thought."

"Oh, sure, lovely," I repeated sourly, reaching a hand
out to stroke the gray mane I still stared at. "With straw-
white hair and stupid-colored eyes and taller than almost
any other woman except Targa Emmen Su Daylath. That
was one of the reasons 1 was such a failure as a thief. A
good thief is more like a ghost, never noticed by the target
or mark, but how could anyone miss someone who looks
the way I do? If I weren't so stubborn 1 would have
changed myself years ago to something more normal, but I
don't want to do that. Looking like something else wouldn't
be me."

"And we must each of us be ourselves," he agreed, his
voice now a murmur. "I am honored that you would speak
to me so, sharing things which surely continue to give you
pain. Perhaps later I, too, will share a thing which is not
easily put into words."

"Only if you want to," I said, finally looking at him
again. "You're very easy to talk to, but 1 don't happen to
have that talent and I know it. And I'm also very tired and
probably have talked too much. All my closest friends in

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

53

the pack were male, but I haven't had a male friend since.
You don't mind being friends with someone older than
you, do you?"

"No, it would please me if we were friends," he said
with a sigh and the oddest smile, one mat made me think
that for some reason he was laughing at himself. "One is
never able to have too many friends." He paused a mo-
ment then said, "What of suitors? You have said naught of
them, yet surely there are many men who came to pay you
court? You speak of yourself with odd disapproval, yet a
man would need to be blind to see you as anything other
than lovely."

"You sound like Morgiana," I told him, making a face
at the nonsense he was trying to get me to believe. "If you
mink you like me way 1 look, it's only because we've
decided to be friends- She says it because she loves me,
and love does weird things even to the Sight. And no, our
doors haven't been broken down by droves of love-crazed
men coming to beg for my hand. Oh, I guess a few
sorcerers and one or two wizards have come calling the
last few years, but Morgiana didn't like them any more
than 1 did, and there must have been something wrong
with them if they were coming after me. But what about
you? You must have had hundreds of girlfriends back in
your own world, especially if you're a king."

"Indeed, I have had all the women I could desire," he
said, his smile widening to a grin. "Few as friends, yet
did 1 nevertheless find the time most pleasant. Many fe-
males seem to desire a king no matter the other qualities he
may or may not possess. Afterward, they, too, were
pleased."

"Well, I know what's going to please me," I said,
glancing ahead to make sure we were still far enough back
before looking straight at him. "If I tell you something,
will you keep it just between us?"

"You would now share a secret," he said with another
sigh, the grin having gone elsewhere- "Perhaps, after that,
/ would do well to speak more plainly- For the moment,
you have my word that I will not repeat whatever is told
me. What is it you would have me know?"

"Just mis," 1 said, deciding 1 didn't have the time to

54

SHARON GREEN

figure out whatever he was talking about. "I've already
mentioned how important this quest is to me, so when I
say I've decided to make sure it's run right, you won't be
surprised. As soon as we pass through the first gate I'm
going to take over as leader, and I want you to be my
second in command.''

"You?" he said, blinking at me with the sort of incom-
prehension he hadn't shown even when 1 was explaining
about magic. "Our leader? Has the wizard not said that the
man with glowing eyes is to be our leader? How do you
mean to convince ..."

"Convince nothing," 1 interrupted, gesturing aside his
objections- "Once I announce the change, he can either go
along with it or go back where he came from. Even if he
didn't agree, how could he stop me? Besides, I have
experience leading, and who knows how much he has? I
was leader of our street pack for almost two years before
Morgiana found me, and I made a damned good leader.
And wouldn't you rather be second in command instead of
just another member of the expedition?"

"At various times in his life, a man fmds me offer of
position tempting," he allowed with a nod and a very
bland look that somehow seemed to be covering amuse-
ment. "There is still, however, the matter of the wishes of
a wizard to consider. And this Rikkan Addis himself.
Should he leave us, we would be lacking his abilities when
we arrived at our destination. Would you see our quest
jeopardized through the lack of some necessary talent?"

"But that's just the point," I urged, determined to get
him off the fence. "All of us have specific talents but him;

he isn't supposed to do anything but lead- Under normal
circumstances / would have been the natural choice for
leader, but Graythor was given reason to doubt me. i don't
blame him for that doubt, but 1 also don't have the time to
prove to him how wrong he is. All 1 can do is what I know
is right."

"But what of the physical defense of our group?*' he
asked, the supposedly neutral question still keeping him
seated firmly where he had been. "Zail T'Zannis, Rikkan
Addis and I have been made responsible for our physical
defense, with Targa Emmen Su Daylath to assist us should

THE PAR SIDE OF FOREVER

55

it become necessary. It would not benefit us to lose one of
our swordanns."

I looked ahead to see again the swords worn by the two
men and the big woman, not to mention the wide slab of
edged metal hanging sheathed between Kadrim Harra and
myself. They all wore the weapons as if they were a part
of them, but that couldn't be as important as the boy
thought it was.

"Magic is better than a sword any day," I assured him,
speaking with all the confidence I felt. "And there's al-
ways the chance that he won't leave the group once he's
replaced anyway. Now, what do you say? Are you with
me?"

"1—must have some time to consider the thing," he
hedged, me mind behind those blue eyes working fast. "I
shall come to you when we have halted for the darkness,
and we may continue the discussion then. Is this accept-
able to you, lady?"

"1 suppose so," I grudged with a sigh, knowing 1
wasn't about to get a commitment out of him right then
even if we kept talking for the rest of the morning. "And
you don't have to call me 'lady'. My name is Laciel."

"A lovely name for a lovely woman," he said, really in
a hurry to change subjects. "It would please me to have
you call me Kadrim. Have you no other names to go with
the one, Laciel? A woman such as you should have many
names for a man to put his lips upon."

"Those with the Sight usually use only one name," 1
explained with no more than partial attention to what I was
saying, already being distracted by the consideration of
what time would be best for the takeover. "There's a
heavy link between people and their names, so if you
know their real names you have considerably more power
over them. The Sighted all have use names, chosen for
them by someone else to cut down on possible affinity-
choices, and those are the names they're known by.
Morgiana chose Lay-see-el, and I can't think of a name I'd
dislike more."

"Yes, it would definitely be wisest waiting for the
darkness," he muttered, for some reason back to sighing. 1

56              SHARON GREEN

couldn't imagine why he kept making such strange com-
ments, but at that point I had other things to think about.

The woods we rode through lasted until the sun had
climbed a good deal higher in the sky, and then they
deserted us. Beyond was a wider road leading between
broad, cultivated fields, and by that time Kadrim and I
were riding considerably closer to the rest of the group.
Targa Emmen Su Daylath was still in the lead with Soffann
Dra half a length behind her, Zail T'Zannis beside Soffann
Dra, and Rikkan Addis alone just behind them. He'd
looked over his shoulder one last time when Kadrim and I
had finally caught up, a curious expression in those bronze
eyes when they touched the redheaded boy, and after that
he hadn't bothered looking back again. It occurred to me
that he might be considering Kadrim a possible rival for
his new position, which just goes to show how wrong you
can be if you really work at it.

It wasn't quite noon when we reached the town, in the
middle of lots of other traffic, both vehicular and foot.
Wagons and people on horseback and even more people on
shank's mare were converging on the meadow that stretched
wide and crowded in front of the town, and everyone was
laughing and joking in the true holiday spirit. Tents and
booths and wagons were spread out all over the meadow,
tinny-sounding bands were playing, conversation, barter-
ing and come-ons sounded everywhere from the growing
crowds, and the previously fresh air was heavy with the
smells of animals, people, food, leather goods, newly
worked metal, you name it. The town was having a fair,
and everyone from fifty miles around or more must have
come to enjoy it.

"Oh, I wonder what jewelry and silks they're show-
ing," Soffann Dra exclaimed, leaning up in her stirrups to
see if anything was visible from where we'd stopped be-
side the road. From the fact that those hours of riding
hadn't affected her any more than it had the rest of us, I
could see that Graythor had given her more than simple
horsemanship ability.

"We'll just be stopping for a meal and a short rest."
Rikkan Addis said as he looked around, his tone distracted
and very faintly unsure. "We might even be best off

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

57

continuing on to the inn on the other side of this town that
the wizard told me about. Wandering around in a crowd
this size doesn't strike me as a very good idea."

"But the people at the inn are probably all here,"
Soffann Dra protested with a pretty pout, moving her
white horse closer to the man's roan. "Please, Rik, just
for a little while, it won't hurt anything. Won't you say
yes for me?"

When she batted her long, dark lashes his way she was
almost close enough to knock him off his horse, and
probably would have if he hadn't been that much bigger
than she. When he didn't answer immediately it was most
likely concussion that kept him silent, and that gave Zail
T'Zannis a chance to jump in.

"It might be a good idea at that, Rik," he urged, faint
amusement in his gray eyes. "I don't know about the rest
of you, but I think I'd like to get a closer look at the
people we'll be trying to help. Bring it away from the
idealistic and down to the personal, so to speak."

"We don't have that much time, but I suppose it'll be
all right," Rikkan Addis gave in with a sigh, opting for
reasonable instead of stubborn. "Let's find a place to
leave the horses."          ^

He and the others began looking around for a good spot
that would be out of the way, but they weren't likely to
find one unless they went into the town itself. At first I
hadn't wanted to take the lime to stop at the fair, but Zail
T'Zannis' request had given me an urge of my own. Just
in case the unthinkable happened, I needed one last happy
time among the people of my world-

"Everyone bring their horses over to that tree," I said,
pointing to a tall, lonesome specimen that stood about fifty
feet to the right of the road, on the side opposite the fair
meadow. "We can leave the horses right there."

"All tied to that one tree?" Zail T'Zannis asked with a
laugh, mis time giving me those gray eyes. "Right where
anyone coming by can walk off with them? If we leave
them there, one of us will have to stay to guard them."

"Don't worry, Zail, I'll stay with them," Rikkan Addis
said, finally giving up on looking around. "There isn't any

58 SHARON GREEN

place better, not unless we go into the town. Just remem-
ber to bring something back for me to eat."

"What noble sacrifice," I commented, backing my gray
out of the press of other horse bodies before turning to-
ward the tree. "If you'll all quit criticizing, complaining
or volunteering and just follow me, you'll fmd mat no one
has to stay behind."

A puzzled silence followed along with them, especially
when I told them not to tie their mounts in what would
have proved to be a very restricted area for such big
horses. Once we were all dismounted I had them move
back, then looked at the area surrounding the tree and
horses. As soon as I decided what size I wanted it to be, I
raised my right hand and spoke the two words necessary to
get it done. The silence behind me was suddenly filled
with startled exclamations, and when I turned to my five
companions they were dividing their stare between me and
me tree.

"They're gone!" Soffann Dra exclaimed, looking less
than pleased with that. "I loved that horse, and now he's
gone! What have you done with him?"

"He's right mere behind the fence," I answered with a
good deal less excitement, glancing over at her. "Would
you prefer being inside with him to visiting me fair?"

"I don't see a fence," she protested, this time without
the exclamation points, her hands flat to the middle of her
pretty green gown, her eyes wider than they had been.

"And neither will anyone else," Rikkan Addis said
with satisfaction, his bronze-colored eyes glowing very
faintly. "I can see your magic is going to come in handier
than I'd expected, giri."

"There is something here I do not grasp," Kadrim said
thoughtfully, just in time to keep me from putting another
fence around Rikkan Addis. My magic was likely to come
in handier than he had expected?

"1 can't imagine what you could be missing, my friend,"
Zail T'Zannis said to Kadrim with a grin while I glared at
Rikkan Addis, who never noticed a damned thing. "First
the horses are there, and now they've disappeared. Noth-
ing simpler."

"The horses haven't disappeared," I said for what felt

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

59

like the thirtieth time, moving part of my glare to the
curly-haired Zail T'Zannis. "I just put a fence around
them, to keep mem in and other people out. You're not
really seeing the tree through the fence, only an image of
it, and I've added a 'Keep Out' sign that will make people
walk around it rather than blunder into it. Don't any of you
know anything about magic?"

"You know how meager my own knowledge upon the
subject is," Kadrim said smoothly while Zail T'Zannis at
least had the grace to look uncomfortable. "I had thought I
now possessed a partial understanding of me thing, yet is
this cleariy not so. You had said, I thought, that you
would hesitate to use spells for the unseen, yet now you
have done so with no difficulty and less reluctance. I
would know from where my confusion arises."

"It arises from your definition of 'unSeen'," I told him,
looking up into those steady blue eyes instead of into all
the rest of the eyes on me. "Invisible and unSeen are two
different things, and what you're looking at now—or,
rather, not looking at—is simply invisible. My spell built a
fence just like any other fence, except for the fact that it
can't be seen. Ail I did was leave the outer physical
appearance of 'fence' out of4ny description, so everything
appeared but its appearance. I hww what the fence looks
like, so it isn't 'unSeen'. 'UnSeen' has no physical appear-
ance to begin with, which is what makes it so hard to
handle."

Kadrim was frowning while his mind wrestled with
what he'd been told, but his expression was the mildest of
the five. Soffann Dra looked totally bewildered and lost,
Targa Emmen Su Daylath was sighing and shaking her
head, Zail T'Zannis was hitting his temple with the heel of
his hand—as though he thought something had gone wrong
with his hearing—and Rikkan Addis was looking around
impatiently. Our fearless leader didn't seem to be very
impressed, and his next words proved it.

"I think we'd better get on to finding some food," he
said, garnering everyone along with a gesture as he turned
back toward the road. "The horses will be safe until we
come back for them, and the lectures can wait until we're
on our way again. All of you stay as close as possible to

6o SHARON GREEN

me, we don't want to get separated in the crowds. The
wizard gave me enough gold to feed us on a regular basis,
so let's start using some of it."

"So let's start using some of it," 1 mimicked softly at
their retreating backs, watching them all heading toward
the road and the fair excitement beyond. "Lectures can
wait until later. Stay as close to me as possible." He
wasn't the expedition leader he was the Daddy, and even
Kadrim was old enough to get along without that. When I
took over, we'd all be even better off than I'd thought.

I trailed along after them into the eager, jostling crowds,
but after a minute or two made no effort to keep up. When
I wanted to find them I'd have no trouble doing it, and
they certainly couldn't ride off and leave me. The sun was
high and hot enough to be uncomfortable, the crowds were
thick enough and close enough to compound that, and
despite the strength I'd gathered to me with a revitalizing
spell, I could still feel a shadow of tiredness; none of that
made any difference, however, in the face of the holiday
feeling I was catching from everyone around me. It had to
be more than two years since I'd last been to a fair, and I'd
loved them even when I was little and couldn't afford to
buy anything. Everyone was always so happy there, and it
felt as if all the people in the world were gathered in that
one place to have fun.

The rush of the crowd carried me with it for a little way,
and then people began moving off in different directions,
men pointing things out to the women with them, kids
tugging at their parents in an effort to make them hurry,
women entranced by the sight of things they'd love to have
and towing chuckling men behind by the hand. Food
smells competed with one another in the heavy air, and
hawkers shouted at the crowds to get mem over to the
booths and buying. Clowns ran in and out of the thinner
crowds, fighting with one another and making people laugh,
urging them to come to their show later and then skipping
off. I was doing no more than strolling around, drinking it
all in, and then I saw one exhibition that drew me to it.

Outside a big black tent with silver stars and moons on
it stood a tall man with a black beard, wearing a long,
wide-sleeved dark blue robe and a tall, pointed hat, both

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        61

decorated like the tent. The man was holding a wand and
talking to the people who had paused in front of his tent,
watching them as they watched the three-legged brazier
standing to his right. A thick bed of coats glowed red in
the brazier, and just above me coals lazed a wide flame
with two very black eyes. The eyes looked up at the
people staring down at them, and when they shifted from
one face to the next, people gasped.

"Don't understand what that's supposed to be," a quiet
voice said from beside me, surprising me into looking
around. Targa Emmen Su Daylath stood at my right elbow
a short distance back from the people in front of the tent,
her eyes on the brazier and the flame, her arms folded
across her chest. None of the others seemed to be with her,
and then it came to me that she'd asked a question.

"That's a salamander," 1 supplied, studying her as she
studied the two black eyes. "The magician is telling the
crowd that his arts captured it and keep it in forced service
to him, but that's just a come-on to get them into the tent
and pay to see the rest of the show. The salamander isn't
bound, it's just here visiting and seeing the sights. When it
gets bored it will simply move on, and he'll have to find
another one to make a deal w^h. They're not master and
slave, they're business partners." .

"Thought the thing might need freeing," she said, bring-
ing her attention away from the attraction and back to me.
"Don't know more about magic than that it is, and don't
really want to know. Shouldn't have wandered away from
us in a place like this, too easy to get lost. Rik said we
should stay together.' *

"I'm sure Rik says a lot of things," I commented,
bringing a flash of amusement to her calm, dark brown
eyes. "If you're so worried about what Daddy will think,
what are you doing away from the nest? I can always use
magic to find them, but you can't."

"Wizard said my tracking ability is some kind of magic,"
she informed me, the words as easy and unimpressive as
the rest of what she'd said had been. "He fixed it so I
could see any trail 1 want to see, and if I can see it I can
follow it. That's how I'm following our trail."

"So if you want to go back, you'll just follow your own

62 SHARON GREEN

trail to where you left them. then theirs to wherever they
went," 1 acknowledged with a nod, still looking up at her.
"That says how you'll get back, but not why you came
away in the first place."

"When there's a group, don't like seeing one all alone
out of it," she said, a faint smite appearing to add to the
calm. "In the tribe, we don't let it happen. You don't like
Rik, but he's got the gold and you have to be as hungry as
lam."

I studied her in silence for a moment, her big body more
man half a head taller than mine and proportionately wider,
her long, light brown hair supported in a high tail by its
bone holder, the yellow leather and swordbelt she wore
doing more to add to her air of competence than detract
from it. She seemed to really enjoy going barefoot, so she
simply did it. Just the way she seemed prepared to do
anything else she felt needed doing. Straight out with no
excuses.

"No, I don't like Rik," I said after me moment, giving
her the sort of smile she was giving me. "But he's not the
only one with coins in his hand, so there's no reason to go
back right away. Let's get something to eat first."

I hadn't needed to use a word, only a gesture, which
meant that she blinked in surprise when I opened my hand
to show the silver. Gold is fine for inns and cities, but at
country fairs silver does better. Less change to get when
you buy something, and less of a stir when you produce it.
There was a food stall not far from the magician's tent, so
we headed for it.

"Your tribe must be a really good place to live,1* I
remarked as we walked, privately hoping that the lines at
the food stall would move quickly. "If everyone's as
friendly as you say, you must miss it quite a lot."

"Would miss it more if my man was still alive," she
answered, also eying me lines we were nearing. "He was
me one who made me feel a part of it all, without him I
don't much care. Hunted for the tribe because they were
good people, because they needed all the hunters they
could get, but my being gone won't make much differ-
ence. A thousand hunters won't keep them alive in those

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER         63

empty lands they ran to, and they're too afraid to go back
to where the game is."

"Why?" I asked with a frown, stopping behind the
crowd of food buyers to look up at her. "Why should they
go to a place to starve, and what happened to your man?"

"Died in the fight with the Wolf tribe," she said, her
shrug putting the whole thing beyond anyone's ability to
change. "Wolf tribe wanted everybody else's land, so they
started a war. We were the third they fought with, and we
didn't do any better than the rest. Our men died where
they stood, and the rest of the tribe ran till they got to the
empty land. Nothing left but women and kids and old
ones, nothing that could face me Wolf tribe. If they went
back the Wolves would take the women and kids and kill
off the old, and they don't want that. Without men to fight
for them, they have no choice- Wanted to go with my man
to stand against me Wolves, but he said no. Didn't want
me dead, he said. Dead wouldn't have been as bad as he
thought."

Her dark eyes were still calm as she merely stated facts,
but / could feel the hurt she wasn't showing. People still
enjoyed themselves all around us, but a little of the warm
brightness was gone from the^day. I looked down at the
piece of silver in my hand, then back up to the big hunter.

"After this quest is over, maybe you'd care to join me
on another trip," I suggested, weighing the coin in my
hand. "I think I'd like to meet that Wolf tribe."

"Won't like meeting you," was all she said, but the
grin she suddenly showed was full of anticipation, not to
mention the first of its kind to be seen on her. The big
woman didn't seem to be the sort to grin much, and I
could understand that. Apparently I'd found something she
could grin at, which I could understand even better. No,
the Wolf tribe would definitely not enjoy meeting me.

The lines in front of us finally thinned enough for us to
reach the stall, and the wait turned out to be worth it. The
stall people were selling meat pies, vegetable pies and fruit
pies, all of them composed of the lightest, most delicious
crust I'd ever tasted. AH the fillings were just as special,
and I was glad I'd bought one of each for each of us. We
stood at the side of me stall eating the delights one after

64               SHARON GREEN

the other, trying not to burn our mouths but making no
effort to wait until they cooled, and it didn't take long to
realize what we were missing. I licked up the last of the
crumbs on my hand, then glanced over at my companion.

"After that, Targa Emma Su Daylath, we need some-
thing cold and wet," I announced, already beginning to
look around at the other stalls and tents. "If you'U tell me
what you'd like, we'll go and find it."

"Always been partial to ale," she answered, brushing
her hands together to get rid of her own crumbs. "Passed
an ale tent on my way here, should be in that direction.
And you can call me Su. My man was Targa Emmen Vad
Areth, Vad and Su the hunters, for the Hawk tribe."

"Su, then," I said with a nod and a smile. "I'm Laciel,
and ale it is in that direction."

We left the stall and headed toward where me ale tent
would be, happily filled and looking forward to quenching
our thrist before rejoining me others. People moved every-
where and in every direction, making us thread our way
through them until we reached a reasonably uncrowded
alley between two lines of tents and stalls. With gambling
going on inside some of the tents and dancers putting on
their shows in others, most of the foot traffic was already
under canvas. Su and I, able to breathe again, strolled up
me alley looking at what could be seen of the doings in
the tents, and were surprised when three men suddenly
materialized in front of us. They wore old and dirty leather—
high, scuffed boots, plain, worn swordbelts—and two of
them had beards. The two with beards were straight-faced,
but the shaven one was grinning.

"You girls looking for a good time?" he asked, letting
his eyes move back and forth between Su and myself, his
book-end friends standing slightly behind him. "You just
come along with us, and we'll show you the best time you
ever had."

"We're not looking for anything you could help us
with," I told him coldly, letting him see I wasn't joking.
"Just get out of our way and find someone else to show a
good time to."

"Now, that's not being very friendly," the beardless
man complained, his dark eyes finally settling for me, his

65

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

grin undisturbed. "You're the only one at this whole fair
who interests me, and 1 won't take no for an answer."

He moved one step toward me, raising his hand to take
my arm, but before he could touch me or the step was
completed, he was stopped by a big hand in the middle of
his chest. The man was barely an inch taller than me,
which made it necessary for him to look up at Su, the one
whose hand had stopped him.

"Wouldn't do that if I were you," she said in her calm,
easy voice, unimpressed by the way the man's grin faded to
a scowl. "Better find somebody else, the way she said."

"And I said I didn't want anybody else," he contradicted
with a matching evenness, then without warning dropped
a wide shoulder to knock Su away from me. The next
instant he and his friends were close and grabbing for me,
and that got me almost as angry as what he'd done to Su. 1
snapped out a word of power meant to drop them in their
tracks—then felt my jaw drop when they did no more man
shiver before closing in to grab me. They were under the
protection of some sort of warding spell, which probably
meant they did that kind of thing on a regular basis. I
could have countered their warding spell if I'd known its
details, but I didn't know and didn't have the time to find
out. They all had their hands or anus on me, and despite
me way I was kicking and struggling, they were beginning
to force me back up me alleyway.

And then a sound came that no one could miss, the
sound of a sword being freed of its scabbard. The beard-
less man and one of his helpers whirled away from me as
they drew their own weapons, paying no attention to the
small clumps of people who had appeared from some-
where to stare and point and ask each other what was
going on. The only one they looked at was Su, her sword
in her fist as she stood waiting for them. The third one
still had his left arm around my waist and his right hand
clamped to my right arm, my kicking doing nothing more
than making him curse. I twisted in his grip but couldn't
get loose—and then the other two had closed with Su:

The sound of metal on metal turned me more desperate
man I had been, especially when I saw that Su was good
enough with a sword to hold her own against the two men

66

SHARON GREEN

for a while, but probably wouldn't be able to best them
both. They would wear her down and kill her before
dragging me off for the ransom or whatever they'd decided
they could get, and I couldn't let that happen. They were
protected against my magic just then, but there's more
than one way to use magic.

The proper gesture and word put the long, heavy piece
of squared wood into my left hand, and I lost no time in
bringing it up and back with alt my strength, catching the
man who held me in the side of the head. He grunted at
the blow and immediately began falling, nearly taking me
down with him before his grip relaxed enough for me to
free myself- As soon as I had pulled loose I ran over to the
three who were swinging away at each other with swords
and did a little swinging of my own, directly at the head of
the second bearded man. Su had been swiping toward his
middle just then, and when his guard dropped she opened
him from side to side. He went straight down to the
ground without making any sound, first unconscious and
then dead.

The beardless man was left to face Su, and that didn't
make him very happy. She had been able to hold off
two swords against her own, and once the odds had been
evened she went on the offensive. He suddenly found
himself defending frantically against an attack that had
almost as much strength behind it as his own, and didn't
seem quite able to match the speed of it. Su drove him
back step by step, and when he tried to disengage and run
she didn't allow it. One quick, strong lunge put her point
in his chest, and when she jerked it out again he never felt
it. He dropped his sword, then folded to the ground, and
that was the end of that.

"That was really nice," I began, moving forward with
the block of wood still in my hand, but was interrupted by
a commotion coming from the other end of the alley. Su
and I both immediately turned that way, sword and wood
coming up together, but all it turned out to be was three
familiar male figures rushing up with swords in their hands,
one small female figure hurrying along behind them. In-
stead of us finding the group, me group had done the
finding.

67

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

"What's going on here?" Rikkan Addis demanded as
the three stopped beside us, all of them looking around at
the mess Su had made. "What happened?"

"Didn't listen when we said to move on," Su told him.
bending to wipe her weapon on her second opponent.
"Tried to take Laciel along with them, didn't think I'd
draw on numbers. Some men are damn fools. Good swing
with mat wood, girl."

"My pleasure," I told her with a smile, gesturing the
wood back to the air it had come from. "Most especially
with the one who was still holding me."

I turned my head to look at my first victim, but all that
was left of him was a mark in the scuffed dirt where he'd
fallen. He'd probably come around soon enough to find
himself outnumbered, and had faded back into the wood-
work where his kind came from.

"Did they harm you?" Kadrim demanded from my
right elbow, and when I looked back saw that he was
talking only to me, a scowl on his smooth, handsome face.
"You must surely be greatly upset from so harrowing an
experience."

"Why would I be upset?" I asked, amused at me way he
slammed his sword back into ite scabbard as though disap-
pointed that he had no one to use k on. "It's been a good
number of years, but when I lived on the streets this sort of
tiling happened all the time- Not to me, of course, but I
wasn't worth ransoming back then. And no, they didn't
hurt me, just mussed me a little."

"This wouldn't have happened if you two had stayed
with tile rest of us as you were told to do," Rikkan Addis
interrupted with a growl, moving nearer to glare at Su and
myself. His weapon had also been returned to its scab-
bard, but his bronze eyes glowed with the sharpness of a
sword edge. "Do you know where we'd be if Su had been
badly wounded or killed? We'd be without anyone to find
the trail for us, and therefore stopped even before we
started! We'd be able to turn this expedition around and go
crawling back to the wizard on our bellies, beaten by our
own stupidity. Didn't that even occur to you?"

By the end of his speech / was me only one those eyes
were accusing, his broad face adding to their anger, tight

68

SHARON GREEN

fists set on hips. Su had been endangered because of me,
because I had disobeyed our great, bronze-eyed leader,
and that could have meant the end of our quest. Rikkan
Addis was a little taller than Su, but that wasn't the reason
he was looking down at me. I'd been a bad little girl, and
now was being scolded for it.

"Since I didn't set out to get Su hurt, it certainly did not
occur to me what might happen," I came back at him,
finding that I'd straightened to my full height, somewhat
aware of the absolute silence holding the rest of our group.
"For your information Su's safety is more important to me
than just in relation to this quest, and if it came right down
to it, I would not have let her get hurt. And even if she
was, for one reason or another, unable to follow the trail
for us, there would still be nothing to stop me from doing
it. Or didn't you know that if I had to, I could bring her
abilities under my control? It would not be particularly
easy, but I could do it."

For someone who had had so many words eariier, he
seemed to have no immediate response to that. I was
standing there and glaring up at him with my own fists on
my hips, furious that he'd lecture me like a child, and in
front of a crowd of people at that. If it hadn't been possible
that Graythor was watching us I would have taken the
leadership from him then and there, but knowing Graythor
he probably was watching. Once we passed through the
first gate, though, he would no longer be able to watch,
and that's when I would make my move. Our fearless
leader absorbed my justifiable truculence with no more
than a thoughtful blink of those bronze eyes, and then he
had brushed it all aside.

"What you can or can't do is completely beside the
point," he said in a flat-voiced growl, making the only
kind of judgment his sort was capable of, "We were
brought together for a purpose, and wandering around
separately, getting into trouble, isn't it. From now on no
one leaves this group without my permission, or the worst
trouble they'll find will come from my direction. Now,
let's get to the horses and back on the road."

He moved one step away and just waited, as though
expecting me to jump to it as fast as I could, desperate to

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

keep from finding the awftu, hovering doom he'd prom-
ised for disobedience. I let my eyes move down his rust-
colored leather to his boots and then back up to his thick
black hair, then deliberately turned to look at Su.

"We haven't had our ale yet, have we?" I remembered
aloud, seeing the instant amusement in her brown eyes
before she lowered her gaze to inspect the back of her left
hand. "I think we'd better get to it fast, to keep the others
from being impatient. I'm sure they're eager to be back on
me road."

Rikkan Addis seemed to have forgotten that / was the
only one who could get behind me fence to the horses, but
apparently me others hadn't. They stirred where they stood
and exchanged quick glances, and for the most part looked
everywhere but at the man who was playing leader. In
actual fact I was even more anxious than he was to take up
the trail again, but considering what we had ahead of us,
ten minutes wasn't likely to make that much of a differ-
ence, and the man had to be taught where he stood with
me. Su hesitated, not quite sure what to say, but good old
Rik took care of that for her,

"You can either walk back to the horses now on your
own, or get carried there over my shoulder," he stated, me
words surprisingly mild in view of his previous anger. "If
I'm leader of this expedition I'm leader over everyone,
which includes you, girl. I don't know why the wizard
wants you in on something as important as this, but if he
thinks we'll need a bad-tempered, ill-mannered trouble-
maker, it's my job to see that she goes with us. You have
your choice, now make it."

The flat challenge hung in the air behind my left shoul-
der, just about where mat stupid man stood, and everyone
was silent again, waiting to see what I'd do. What I
wanted to do was something classical but tacky, like turn-
ing him into a toad or making him three inches high and
then doing a stomp-dance around him, but I couldn't
afford to forget about Graythor and that obedience spell
he'd promised to use. Challenge-answering would have to
wait until we passed through the first gate, but that didn't
mean I had to put up with nonsense. Without even glanc-
ing at me man I put both hands out between Su and

70 SHARON GREEN

myself, palms upward and fingers slightly bent, then said
the proper word. When the two pewter mugs of ale
appeared I handed one to a startled Su, then took the other
by the grip and turned part way back to Rikkan Addis.

"At your service, master, anything you say, master,
yessir, boss," I acknowledged, raising my mug to him in
salute before taking a good swallow from it. The ale was
delicious, dark and cold and just right for the heat of the
day, and after I'd had my swallow I began leading the way
out of the alley- The rest of them came after me without
comment, a silence that lasted all the way back to the
horses. Rikkan Addis should have been thrilled that he'd
gotten his way, but from the last glimpse I'd had of his
expression, I didn't think he was.

CHAPTER 3

Beyond the town there were more fields, and beyond the
fields there were stands of woods, some open grassland,
one stretch of flats, and occasional solitary farms with neat
rows of plantings and fenced in pastures right in the mid-
dle of nothing else. The horses had been satisfied with the
rest and me grass they'd found inside their fence, and
moved along as strongly and evenly as they had that
morning. It took at least an hour before the general silence
was broken, and then only to a certain degree. Su rode out
ahead again with Rikkan Addis not far behind her, Kadrim
had begun a conversation with Soffann Dra, and that left
Zail T'Zannis with something of a problem. He clearly
wanted to talk to somebody, but Su was busy studying the
road, Soffann Dra was exchanging low-voiced chatter with
an absorbed, redheaded boy, and as far as our still-silent
leader went, if the expression on his face meant anything
he probably would have shredded anyone who dared to
approach him. That left only me, but it took the curly-
haired man a minute or two to decide to chance it. The
way he made an effort to ease back without bringing
himself to Rikkan Addis' attention showed he knew how
popular anyone in my company was likely to be with our
leader. Bravely and deftly he did it anyway, though, and
men his black was moving beside my gray where 1 brought
up the rear of our company.

"I wanted to tell you that that ale looked better than

•7I

SHARON GREEN

72

what we had," he offered, grinning widely with an amuse-
ment he didn't seem able to hold down any longer. "I
must say, though, that you giris deserved it. There wasn't
anything left for us men to do."

"It was a lucky thing Su is that good with a sword," I
said, unbending a little at his attitude. "That was just
about the worst time for something like that to happen, but
kidnappers don't usually stop to make convenient appoint-
ments. It also would have been easier if they hadn't been
warded against spells."

"Well, they certainly had good taste when it came to
picking victims," he said, his gray eyes laughing, and
then a more sobering thought came to him. "What do you
mean, they were warded against spells? Does that mean
you couldn't use magic against them?"

"Exactly," I answered with a nod, wondering why they
all seemed to know so little about magic. "If you're going
into the kidnapping business, your best bet is to get some
gold accumulated first, and then go to an apprentice sor-
cerer or sorceress and have a warding spell put on you.
Most apprentices can't yet see gold or silver in fine enough
detail to reproduce it, but warding is simple enough for
just about anybody to do. And a lot of honest people, like
those who deal in jewels or precious metals, pay to be
warded against dishonest magic. If you can manage to
look upright enough, the apprentice will pay more atten-
tion to the fee than the reason you want to be warded, and
you're in business."

"The kidnapping business," he said, distaste briefly
wrinkling his expression. "What makes these warding
spells so simple?"

"The fact that they're nothing more than invisible re-
flecting surfaces," 1 said, this time wondering if I ought to
set up a general lecture series. "What the speH does is put
a thin, undetectable mirror bubble around the person, one
specifically designed to reflect back magic, but the minor
details make it hard to crack. The bubble doesn't necessar-
ily have to be round, and its thickness can also vaiy.
which means no one who doesn't know its exact shape and
thickness can dissolve it. In order to have power over it

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

73

.you have to describe it in detail; without the detail, you're
wasting your time trying."

"Maybe they weren't trying to kidnap you," he sug-
gested after shaking his head, a grin beginning to grow
again. "Maybe they just couldn't get a woman any other
way, and were desperate. Once or twice I've considered
trying that method myself."

"But you're not warded," I pointed out with a chuckle,
enjoying the comment he'd made. "If you try it on the
wrong woman, you could end up a living two-dimensional
cut-out, hung on a wall for decoration or rolled up and put
away on a shelf. Which is what I intend doing to that third
one who disappeared, if I ever come across him unwarded.
1 don't like being strong-armed."

"I don't blame you a bit," he agreed, his left hand
coming across the space between us to close gently over
one of mine, his pretty gray eyes filled with understand-
ing. "Men who try to force themselves on women deserve
anything they get. Women arc there to be appreciated, and
taken care of, and handled gently, like the priceless works
of art they are. Don't you think so?"

"I—never really thought about it," I stumbled, sud-
denly very aware of his hand on mine, wishing his eyes
would let mine go. The saddle was harder than it had been
and the day abruptly hotter, and if my mount hadn't been
watching the road we probably would have found our-
selves off it.

"It's the best and only way," he assured me, his smile
very warming in spite of its softness, "From the moment I
first saw you I knew you were a woman who was born to
be treated like that, and myself as the man born to do it.
I'm Zail and you're Laciel, and when we stop at an inn
tonight we'll have dinner together, just you and me. If
young Kadrim tries to join us, we'll just tell him we'd
prefer being alone It's about time someone starting treat-
ing you the right way, not shouting at you the way Rik
did, and you'll have a wonderful time. I guarantee it."

At that point I couldn't think of anything to say, not in
any language ever created. No man had ever spoken to me
like that before, especially not one as good-looking at Zail,
and I couldn't decide if 1 wanted to drop my eyes away

74

SHARON GREEN

from his or keep on noticing how beautiful his were. I
have no idea how long the dilemma lasted, but suddenly it
was solved in a way that should have been predictable.

"Zail!" Rikkan Addis called, looking back over his
shoulder at us, his expression only a little lighter than it
had been. "I could use a few minutes of your time."

"Right with you, Rik," Zait acknowledged with a wave,
then his attention was briefly mine again. "I have to go
now, but I'll probably be useless if he wants to discuss
anything in the way of planning for the quest. My mind
will be too full of thoughts about tonight. Until then ..."

He took my hand and raised it briefly to his lips, then he
was urging his black horse forward toward where Rikkan
Addis rode in our procession, up front where a leader
belonged. I looked down at the hand Zail had kissed.
wondering why it tingled that way, wondering if I should
curse fearless leader for breaking things up just then, or
thank him for doing it. Zait was unlike any man I had ever
known, and somehow I couldn't decide how I should feel
about what he'd said. Dinner together, just the two of us,
him and me. I'd occasionally had dinner with men before,
but they'd been magic users and couldn't seem to talk
about anything but that. Not to mention how nervous
they'd been. Zail wouldn't be nervous, and somehow I
knew he wouldn't be talking about magic, and I found
myself wanting to hear what he would be talking about. I
shifted in the saddle, knowing I'd be thinking about him
even after the dinner was over and I'd gone to bed, and
discovered that I liked that idea. We'd be spending a lot of
time together until the quest was finished, and I liked that
idea even more. Maybe having companions along wasn't
going to be so bad after all.

The rest of the afternoon drifted by without bringing
itself to my attention, most of my thoughts involved with
the quest and where it would take us. That particular line
of consideration was enough to distract me even from
thoughts of Zail and dinner, and no matter how hard I tried
pushing it away, it continued to insist on coming back and
hopping around in front of me. Graythor had told everyone
the night before that the quest would take us an unbe-
lievably far distance from that world-dimension, but he

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

75

hadn't gone into details about what we would find there.
He hadn't lied when he'd said he didn't know what we
would find, but he hadn't mentioned any of the stories
we'd both heard about the place, either. . . .

"Oh, thank goodness we're finally here," Soffann Dra's
voice came, drawing me back to the world-dimension we
hadn't yet left. "I don't think I could have ridden one foot
past it."

The "it" she was talking about was the inn we'd been
looking for, one that wasn't supposed to be very far from
the first gate. We'd spend our last night on that world in
comfort, and after that take accommodations as they came.
If nothing turned up that was suitable I'd produce tents and
things for us with magic, which kept us from having to
drag along pack horses and tons of equipment, which in
turn would make things easier for me at the gates. It took a
lot of power and strength to move things without power of
their own through a gate, and five people and six horses
were going to be hard enough.

The inn was bright in the darkness that had descended
on everything around it, standing in the middle of a large
cleared space in me woods to the right of the road. Wel-
coming light spilled out of windows on each of its two
floors, and lanterns had been set on the outside of both
house and stable. It promised a comfortable haven in the
middle of nothing but trees and road. and yet even as we
rode into the yard and slowed to a stop. something about it
began bothering me. It was cheerful and friendly and we
could hear the sounds of conversation coming from inside,
but there was something. . . .

"Rub them all down and give them oats, boy," Rikkan
Addis was saying to me gangling teenager who had hurried
out of the stable, followed by two younger assistants.
"We'll be staying the night, but we'll want them early
tomorrow."

"Yes, sir!" the boy acknowledged, snatching the coin
tossed to him out of the air and pocketing it quickly before
taking the reins being held out. Then he gestured hurriedly
to his assistants to do the same with the rest of our horses,
which meant it was time to dismount. I was almost as tired
as Soffann Dra claimed to be, which was probably why I

76               SHARON GREEN

was seeing strangeness where there wasn't any. The fresh,
dewy night air was beginning to make me sleepy, and I
hoped getting back on my own two feet would wake me up
a little. I started to dismount—and suddenly felt an arm
around my waist.

"Here, let me help you," Zail said, lifting me down
against his chest before slowly lowering me to the ground.
There was more than enough light to see those gray eyes
by, and they were looking at me again as they had that
afternoon. His arms didn't leave my waist immediately,
die hand firm against my ribs, and once again I felt as
though I'd lost the ability to speak. It was stupid for a
grown woman to be acting that way, as though she'd never
met or spoken to a man in her life before, but there was
something about that particular man. . . .

"Let's get inside and settled," Zail said, letting me go
as though reluctant to do it, then taking the single rein I
held to give it to the boy waiting for it. "As soon as we've
arranged for rooms, we can get to that dinner."

The dinner for just the two of us. We stood and waited
while the horses were led out of the way toward the stable,
then joined the others in walking toward the house. Zail
wasn't touching me at all right then, and I felt the loss of
his hand and arm more than I would have thought possi-
ble. Normally I didn't like being touched, usually I avoided
it even if I had to be downright rude; I couldn't really
imagine why Zail would want to touch me, but also found
that I didn't have the urge to laugh, or wonder aloud about
his desperation, or do anything that would keep him from
wanting to do it again. That was probably why I'd been
finding it so hard to speak, afraid I'd say something stupid
or clumsy and drive him away. . . .

Rikkan Addis opened the inn door and led the way
inside, Kadrim right behind him, then Soffann Dra and Su,
then me with Zail bringing up the rear. The big room we
walked into already had ten or twelve people in it, seated
at the long rectangular tables with food or drink or both m
front of them, the lamps on the walls casting odd shadows.
At the back of the room opposite the door was a long bar,
with a heavyset man in a once-white apron behind it, just
then handing over two mugs of ale to a slender young

THE PAR SIDE OF FOREVER

77

thing who was obviously a serving girl. The girl was the
only female in the room aside from those of us who had
just arrived, and when she turned away from the bar the
man behind it beamed at us.

"Welcome, travelers'" he called in a rough voice trying
to be professionally jolly, gesturing us toward him. "Are
you here for the night, or just for a meal?"

"For the night and for a meal," Rikkan Addis told him,
starting over toward the bar. "We'U want two of your
bigger rooms and breakfast in the morning as well, early
enough to let us be on our way at first light."

"Rik, I've had a thought about those rooms," Zail said,
moving past the rest of us fast to catch up to fearless
leader. "Since this is probably the last night the girls will
be able to have any privacy, why not . . ."

His voice lowered as he reached the other man's side,
causing Kadrim and Soffann Dra to step closer to hear
what he was saying, also making Su curious enough to do
the same thing. As a matter of fact I was more than a little
interested myself, especiallly since 1 had no intention of
sharing a room for the night. Over the years I'd learned to
enjoy having a place all to myself rather than having to
share it with others, and if Rikkan Addis wanted to be
thrifty with Graythor's gold that was his business. He
could sleep in the house's back corridor for all I cared, but
/ was not going to be packed into a cheap, communal stall.
I started to move forward to make my position as clear as
possible—and that's when everything began happening at
once.

Very casually three of the inn's previous guests sud-
denly stepped between me and the others, big men dressed
in rough homespun undecorated with swordbelts. For a
moment 1 thought they were just going past so I stopped to
let them get by. but continuing in their original direction
wasn't what they had in mind. Without any warning all
three were abruptly around me the way the three at the fair
had been, rough hands grabbing for me and heavy bodies
already pushing me toward the door. A deep male voice
shouted wordlessly, possibly Kadrim although I couldn't
be sure, and then the other "guests" were streaming from
their tables with swords in their fists, the sound of metal

78              SHARON GREEN

striking metal coming when they reached the others. The
inn was a trap, and my suspicions about it had been right.

It's been said that be who hesitates is lost, but some-
times a little forethought can outbalance the hesitation of
shock. Attack was the last thing I'd been expecting at the
inn, but part of my thinking during the afternoon had been
about the warding the three kidnappers had had that had
kept me from defending myself with magic. I hadn't en-
joyed being helpless, and when 1 dislike something that
strongly I usually try to think of a way to keep it from
happening again. I had thought of something that might be
a way, and there would never be a better time to try it.

The three men were having only minor trouble forcing
me toward me door over my struggles, and none of them
were making the least effort to silence me. That told me
they had to be warded me way me others had been, so I
closed one fist tight in anger and spoke the two-word spell
I'd prepared only a few hours earlier. Instantly the light-
nings blazed high and all three of mem screamed and
threw themselves away from me, me agony they'd brought
on themselves dropping them to the plank floor to roll
them about moaning. With their thick bodies out of the
way I could see that the "serving girl" had been making
her way over to us, but had frozen still in fear and shock
when her friends had gone down. Just then she stood
staring at me wide-eyed, the back of her hand to her
mouth, and when I met her stare she simply turned and
ran.

The noise of fighting and cursing was rather loud even
in a room that size, and a quick look around showed me
two more bodies on the floor, both of them "guests." One
had a shirt that was soaked in blood and the other only half
a head, but our side was still outnumbered about two to
one. Soffann Dra was the only one without a swinging
sword in her fist, and she stood cringing behind a wildly
fighting Kadrim. trying her best not to be noticed. The
attackers were fighting back as though they didn't care
whether they lived or died as long as they took us with
them, and that was another clue that told me even more
than my not having been silenced had.

Moving to the right, away from the three on the floor,

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

79

let me see past the fighting to the bar. Just as I'd hoped the
"innkeeper" was simply standing where he had been, his
face calm, his attention on the fight. I drew myself up and
spoke me word of power, and all outside sounds faded as
me cylinder formed between and around us, locking us
together in a private world that was nevertheless still in the
middle of that inn. He started in surprise, obviously not
expecting anything like that, and then he laughed in a way
that was supposed to sound superior, rather than the way it
did sound—which was frightened.

"You can't seriously be challenging me, Laciel," he
said after the laugh, trying to straighten up a bit more.
"My power is years stronger man yours."

"If that's true, then I'll lose," I told him, Seeing that he
wasn't disguised. "You seem to know me, but I can't
remember when we met. Who are you?"

"That's something you have no need to know," he
answered, finding a little more courage somewhere. "It's
enough that I know who you are. Surrender to me now and
you'll live, resist me and you'll die; those are the only two
things we have to talk about- Which will it be?"

"Neither," I said with all the disgust I was feeling, and
then I raised my arm to signal the start of the combat and
fling out the raging, ravening sphere of Hellfire toward
him. He gasped and paled just the way I'd thought he
would, gesturing frantically in an attempt to send the thing
back to me, but Hellfire takes confidence as well as skill to
handle, which is why so few of the Sighted become adept
at it. You become adept by entering the Lists at Conclaves
and formally challenging those stronger man you, accept-
ing the minor burns of a controlled exhibition in order to
add to your confidence and skill. Whoever my current
opponent was, he wasn't adept, otherwise I would have
known him; I was adept, supposedly at a younger age than
anyone had managed in centuries, and it didn't take long
to prove it.

The man in the combat cylinder with me sweated and
ducked as he gestured, trying to avoid the Hellfire even as
he fought to force it away from him, frantically trying to
spread his fingers into the best and most widely used
repelling mode that had been developed. My right hand

So

SHARON GREEN

was already set that way. urging the terrifying ball of
annihilation closer and closer to him, playing it to give
him the least amount of room for the return. The blazing
colors of the Hellfire were blindingly beautiful, the searing
jump of its numberless fingers a raging hunger reaching
out to consume, and the man's fear grew greater with
every inch closer it came to him. He fought to control it,
struggled to keep it from him, and when he crossed the
line from trying to send it back to trying to keep it away,
the fight was lost. The crackling of the ball of flame rose
to a roar that nearly drowned out the man's scream of
ten-or, and the blast was so bright that it really did blind
me for a minute. The scream seemed to go on and on,
making me press my hands to my ears as well as squeeze
my eyes closed, and then mere was absolute silence and
darkness, both thick enough to be felt rather than sensed.

"Laciel! Laciel, where are you?" a voice shoiiied, a
voice that I finally recognized as Zail's. I forced my eyes
open to see the dark all around, shivered even though I
understood, then whispered a word. A small sun blazed up
over our heads under the trees, lighting up me scene so
that it was almost day bright.

The three men of our group and Su all still stood with
swords in their hands, but they no longer had targets for
their weapons. Their former opponents littered the ground,
and only some of them showed visible wounds. Soffann
Dra still trembled behind Kadrim with one hand to his bare
back as though seeking comfort from contact with another
human being, and nothing at all remained of the man I'd
stood in combat with, not even the cylinder. When I
realized that I shivered again, and then Zail was beside
me, holding me close to his chest with his arms wrapped
tight.

"What happened?" he asked, his voice faintly bewil-
dered and the least bit unsteady. "Are you all right? What
happened to the inn, and those men, and the one you were
standing and facing? That fire, that blinding explosion—
What was it?"

"It was—combat with Hellfire," I answered, wonder-
ing why I couldn't do anything but hold to Zail and shiver.
"We do it all the time at Conclaves, those of us who can.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

81

It's the way me Sighted fence with their power, bringing
me Hellfire through a simple entry and then seeing who
can control it best. At the Conclaves there are wizards who
keep me Hellfire from really touching the loser, from
doing more than singeing him or her a little— I've never
before fought a real battle with it— It—it—ate him—
Zail—"

I was trembling so hard that I wanted to be sick,
finding a real win nothing like a Conclave win. There
hadn't been a wizard handy to control the Hellfire and send
it back when the combat was over, so it had been free
to—eat—the man before me entry drew it back! I held to
Zail with all my strength and buried my face in his shirt,
trying to control my shuddering but finding it impossible. I
hadn't simply killed mat man, I'd fed him to something,
and I'd never once, during all those combats, thought to
consider just exactly what mat meant.

"They're all dead," Rikkan Addis' voice came from
behind me, calm and quiet and almost even. "Do you
know why they're dead, girl? Or what happened to the
inn?"

"They're dead because—he's dead," I answered, trying
to find something else to think about besides— "He had
them under a spell of compulsion, and they would have
fought until you were all dead or they themselves bumed
out. The abrupt release—their systems couldn't take it—"

"It's all right, you're doing just fine," he said in a
soothing murmur, as though afraid that speaking any louder
would really set me off. "And me inn? What happened to
it?"

"The same thing, in effect, because it wasn't the real
inn," 1 said, finally calming down enough to simply put
my cheek to Zail's shirt. His arms were still tight around
me, which helped more than he probably knew, and I was
able to look at the black trees and darkness beyond the
glow from my small sun. "As a matter of fact I Saw the
gaps and lapses as soon as we rode in, but I was too tired
to really understand what I was Seeing. He was the one
maintaining the image, and when he died the spell went
with him. He—wasn't as good as he thought he was,
otherwise the inn would have been an exact replica of the

82

SHARON GREEN

real one instead of a sloppy copy. And anyone truly com-
petent also wouldn't have protected their henchmen with
nothing but simple warding.'*

"You mean those three who went after you were warded
like the ones this afternoon?" Zail asked, this time sound-
ing surprised. "But if they were protected from your
magic, how did you get away from them?"

"With magic," I answered with a sigh, finally making
the effort to push back from him and stand alone. "It
came to me this afternoon that warding was defensive
magic, designed to protect people from attack from others.
Those kidnappers used the warding to let them do the
attacking which, if you think about it, is using something
defensive for offense. Magic has a kind of balance, and
you can't use something meant for one purpose in an
entirely opposite manner without paying a price. I used a
beefed-up warding spell to protect myself, adding a lot of
insulation on the inside, working on the theory that their
attack would—blow the circuits—on their own spell when
they tried using it against its nature. As soon as their
warding touched mine, they were nearly knocked across
the room."

"What did you mean, those three this afternoon were
warded like the ones tonight?" Rikkan Addis asked, his
tone fractionally sharper. "1 didn't know there was any-
thing magical about this afternoon's attack."

I'd put my hands over my face to let my fingers rub at
my eyes, but something in the man's voice made me take
them away again. When the pretty -colored spots had all
faded I saw those bronze eyes looking down at me, and
they were glowing faintly.

"There wasn't anything magical about this afternoon's
attack," I said, wondering if I were being gently accused
of hiding things. "Those kidnappers were warded like the
three attackers tonight, but that can't be anything but
coincidence."

"Like the coincidence that the three tonight were head-
ing you toward the door?" he came back immediately,
annoyance growing in both eyes and voice. "You and Su
agreed that it was you they wanted this afternoon, and

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        83

tonight they almost had you again. Who would want you
so badly, and why?"

"But—no one!" 1 protested, certain he couldn't possi-
bly be right, but still beginning to get confused. "And it
can't be just me they were after. They had fighters under a
compulsion ready, and sent them after the rest of you."

"But not until drey already had their hands on you," he
countered, those eyes glowing brighter now, one big hand
running distractedly through thick black hair. "Once they
had you they felt free to attack the rest of us, but first they
took you. Why would that be?"

"Perhaps they feared what magic she would use," Kadrim
suggested from where he stood with Su and Soffann Dra,
only a couple of feet away. "Did the wizard not say her
power was great?''

"But they found out this afternoon that her magic couldn't
get through their warding," Zail disagreed from behind
me, sounding as confused as Kadrim had and I felt. "If
they really are all the same group, the one who got away
would have told them what happened. And if they aren't
all the same group, what's bringing so many of them out
from under their rocks all at the same time?"

"That part's not hard," Soffann Dra said, moving just a
little closer to Kadrim after a glance at the darkness all
around. "We're after something that was stolen, aren't
we? Anyone who keeps us from getting it back, can
probably ask for and get all the gold he wants from the
thief."

"Couldn't ask if he didn't know about it," Su put in,
surprising just about everyone, "The wizard said no one
knows but us and him, so how could they know."

"There is someone else who knows," Rikkan Addis
said suddenly, staring at Su where she stood under the
low-gauge glare of the miniature sun. "The one who took
the balance stone knows, and is also obviously in a posi-
tion to set up ambushes along the trail we have to follow.
Knowing that much, I also now know why they've been
trying for you first, girl."

Those eyes were back to looking at me, but for once
they couldn't distract me. He claimed to know something,
but for the life of me 1 couldn't see it.

SHARON GREEN

"You totd me the reason yourself," he pressed when he
saw that I wasn't following him, seemingly oblivious to all
the rest of the eyes on him. "You said that if you had to,
you could make Su's talent your talent, and I'm now
willing to bet you could do me same with me rest of us. If
one of us didn't make it all the way, you could substitute
for that one."

"As a matter of fact, I could," I admitted, still not
seeing where the line of logic was leading. "As long as I
know what the necessary talent is, I can reproduce it. If I
tried to match all of you I'd probably be good for nothing
more than counting my fingers afterward, but if I had to I
could do it. What has that got to do with kidnap attempts?
With all of you still around, 1 don't have to reproduce your
talents."

"That's why they're trying for you first," he said with
the sort of slow patience that forces home a point, folding
his arms across his rust-colored leather shirt- "There's no
sense in their trying to stop us if you're still around, not
when they can kill every one of us and still lose the game
to you. If they manage to get you out of me way, then they
can try for one or two of us. Without your particular
talent, mat would be enough to stop me rest of us."

Put that way, the idea was very hard to argue against. 1
just stood and stared at him without being able to say
anything, then discovered that I was also being stared at.
Five pairs of eyes were reflecting me digestion of the fact
that as long as I stayed alive and a part of the group, they
were as safe as a quest like that was likely to let mem be. I
didn't care for that thought, and wasn't even sure I agreed
with all of it, but for me third time that day the words just
weren't there-

"I think we'd better get on to me real inn now," Rikkan
Addis said, unfolding his arms to look around. "It's prob-
ably the safest thing we can do, considering that they tried
to trap us here. Using the real inn would have been easier,
if they could have managed it. Maybe there's a reason they
couldn't. Kadrim, Su, see if you can find the horses. The
rest of us will stay with the girl."

Kadrim and Su nodded before going off, and Soffann
Dra lost no time in replacing the red-haired boy with

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER         85

Rikkan Addis as someone to stand close to. A minute later
there was an arm around my shoulders, and Zail was
standing to my left, tall and concerned and protective. It
was all I could do to keep from pushing that arm away, an
arm 1 would have been delighted to have around me just a
few minutes earlier. They were now all going to be look-
ing out for "the girl," and "the girl" didn't like it one
little bit.

The horses hadn't been taken very far, and once we
were back on the road with my miniature sun doused, I
discovered that the line of march had been shifted without
anyone saying a word. Su was still out front with a ner-
vous, tired Soffann Dra beside her, but the men had
rearranged themselves so that Zail rode to my right, Kadrim
behind me. and fearless leader to my left. I didn't like the
new arrangement and tried to talk mem out of it, but they
were all too busy looking in seven directions at once to
listen to me. Even Su had muttered something about al-
most losing me because she hadn't been bright enough to
follow the trail to the inn rather than the trail that was
taking us to the balance stone; the two were supposed to
have been the same, and would have been if we'd gone on
to the, real inn. At that point I discovered I was too tired to
continue me argument for that day, and simply saved my
strength for any further emergencies.

Happily, all emergencies proved to have retired for the
night. Another half hour^s riding brought us to the place
we should have reached the first time, and my companions
were faintly upset to see that it looked exactly like the inn
mat had been reproduced for us back in the woods, right
down to the three boys who came running out to see to our
horses. I, myself, took a good long look at the place
before dismounting, and immediately Saw why the trap
had been set at the duplicate.

"Take it slow until we've checked this place out, Laciel,"
Zail fussed at me as I handed over me reins of my gray
men turned toward the house. "We don't know what can
be waiting for us inside."

"There's nothing to worry about here, Zail," I said
with a sigh, stopping because of the hand on my shoulder.
"They couldn't set the trap here because Graythor warded

86

SHARON GREEN

this place, with a spell to keep out anyone with evil
intentions. Considering some of the people who usually
ride this road on a regular basis, we might even find the
place empty."

That seemed to settle them down a bit, but it was still
Kadrim and fearless leader who walked into the house
first, their right hands loose and ready. The big room held
about five people aside from the serving girl and the
innkeeper, and none of them looked familiar including the
last two. The girl was small and blond and tired-looking,
and the innkeeper was tall and lean with a long, unhappy
face. Our sudden, group appearance made him uneasy, but
mat disappeared quickly enough when Rikkan Addis stepped
forward and threw three gold coins on the bar.

"We need meals and lodgings for the night," he told
the suddenly happier innkeeper, watching as the man made
me coins disappear with a single movement of his hand.
"For the food we'll take the best you have, but for sleep-
ing we want one of your dormitory rooms. Our group will
be staying together, but alone; if there's anybody already
in the room, clear them out."

"Just a minute," I said as the innkeeper began nodding
in surprised but nevertheless eager agreement, moving past
Kadriro to get to the bar. "I don't care what the rest of you
do, but 1*11 be sleeping in a private room tonight. Crowds
tend to keep me awake."

"You can't be guarded as easily in a private room as
you can be in a dormitory," Rikkan Addis said with a
touch of annoyance, looking down at me with those eyes
again. "As long as I'm me one with the gold, we'll do
things my way."

"Then isn't it lucky for me that I can afford to pay my
own way?" I remarked, opening my hand to show the
three gold coins I'd just produced before handing them
over to the innkeeper. "As far as being guarded goes, I've
already told you that this place is safe. If you're in the
mood to ruin what will probably be everyone's last decent
night's sleep just to play fearless leader, don't try to count
me in on it. Tonight I make up for what I missed last
night. Give me my key."

The last of my words were for the innkeeper, who had a

8?

THE FAR SIDE Of FOREVER

key in my outstretched hand before the final syllable died
away. He hadn't missed the fact that there hadn't been any
gold in my hand when I'd first walked over, and knew
exactly what that meant. If his odd new guest was about to
get into an argument with a sorceress, he wanted no part of
it.

But his odd new guest apparently decided against an
argument with a sorceress; I was able to leave the main
room with nothing but silence following me, find the stairs
leading upward, then locate the room that matched the
number on my key. The room was dark when I opened the
door, but a snap of my fingers brought the lamp to life,
dimly illuminating a small, not particularly neat and clean
box that had a bed and a chair and one window, and
nothing else. The patch-quilt on the bed was faded, the
linen was more yellow than white, and the greasy brown
chair had one leg snorter than the others; nevertheless I
closed and locked the door behind me, threw the key on
the chair, then sat down on the bed.

"You still haven't learned to follow orders very well,
have you?" a voice asked, a voice I'd been half expect-
ing to hear. I looked up to see Graythor's image sitting on
the chair, paying no mind, of^course, to the key it wasn't
really sitting on. It was his true image that he had sent,
and his dark eyes were staring straight at me.

"I had the feeling you were watching, checking to see
how well we could take care of ourselves," I said, making
no attempt to avoid his gaze. "Did we pass?"

"You've had no real opposition yet and you know it,"
he came back, his voice as even and undisturbed as it had
been. "We'll find out what you're all made of once you
get a little farther down the trail."

"Why didn't you stop it?" I demanded, too tired to play
any more word games. "You were there at the replicate
inn, 1 know you were! Why didn't you stop the Hellfire?"

"Laciel, child, it wasn't a friendly competition," he
said, his eyes commiserating but his tone cold and im-
placable. "If Draffan had gotten control of the sphere, it
would have been you who was devoured So far they've
underestimated you, but that can change at any time.

88

SHARON GREEN

Now, I think, you can understand why your being leader
of this expedition would have been impractical."

"Because they're after my head first?" 1 asked with a
sound of ridicule, not terribly happy with his answer con-
cerning the Hellfire, but needing to discuss this other point
as well. "Most leaders are targets, so what difference
would it make? At least if I was leader I could keep them
from suffocating me, which is what I intend seeing to first
thing in the morning. With the number of personal de-
fenses I have, their attempts at protection are ludicrous."

"Their attempts are necessary, not ludicrous," he said
very sternly, his anger enhancing the heavy flow of power
from his twisted image-body as he straightened in the chair
as best he could. "You still have no idea what you're
fighting against, and if you were leader you would under-
estimate the enemy just as they're doing with you! You
need to be protected for more reasons than you know, and
Rikkan Addis is the one to do it! He will remain leader,
and you will stop bedeviling him!"

It had been a long time since Graythor had last spoken
to me like that, showing so much of his enormous power,
and it wasn't something I'd be able to argue against for a
long, long time—if ever. There was no question about
how much stronger he was—but Acre was also no ques-
tion about my own opinions on the points. Rather than try
to argue I simply stretched out across the creaking bed on
my right side, busily inspecting the faded patch-quilt under
me, saying not a word.

"I'm tempted to have a few words with Morgiana when
she returns, but I have the distinct feeling it's already too
late," he growled at my silence, less angry but more
annoyed. "Once you make up that mind about something.
it's just about impossible to sway you. Try to understand
that Rikkan Addis is the best leader for the expedition,
otherwise 1 wouldn't have chosen him. Just as you're the
best Sighted for it. You can't let your personal feelings get
in the way of what has to be done."

"What personal feelings?" I asked with a snort, looking
up at him over the foot of the bed. "Knowing you can do
a better job than someone else isn't opinion if you can

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

89

i             •_

' ^

:!

'    t,

&"

prove it—which I can. Don't you want the balance stone
recovered?"

"Your attitude toward Rikkan Addis has nothing to do
with the balance stone," he said, back to staring at me and
almost back to calm. "Laciel, the man is different, almost
in the same away you're different, and you're blaming him
for that. Also, everyone is accepting him without question
despite his difference, and you're blaming him for that as
well. It all has to do with why you've never even tried to
find the people you come from,"

"That's ridiculous," I said after forcing the words over
a pause, finding that the patch-quilt was a much better thing (o
look at than the image of Graythor- "What could fearless
leader possibly have to do with whoever my people were?"

"He has nothing to do with them," me gentle but
persistent answer came as I picked at the stitching of the
quilt. "You seem to have come to the conclusion that your
people didn't want you because of your differences, and
that's why you were abandoned to grow up on the streets
like a homeless animal. You equate different with wrong,
which is why you feel so strongly that Rikkan Addis is the
wrong one to lead the expedition- You've also learned
some small measure of personaLself-esteem over the years
with Morgiana, and that's why you feel that if anyone
different is to be leader, that one should be you. You're
going to have to take my word for me fact that everything
is already as it should be, and be satisfied with that."

"I'm rarely satisfied with second best or blind specula-
tion," I muttered to the quilt, certain that what he'd said
was absolutely untrue, but much too tired to go looking for
me logic flaws. "Would you mind very much letting me
go to bed now? Fearless leader will be chasing us out early
in me morning, and I'd hate to oversleep."

"Very well, then, we'll do it your way," he said, and
all the compassion in his voice was gone behind the return
of sternness. "I've devised a spell I'd hoped would be
unnecessary, but your stubbornness leaves me no choice.
From now on Rikkan Addis will be warded, but not in the
usual way. If you make any attempt at all to use magic
against him, your spells will bounce back changed into the
strongest obedience spell I could find, leaving you needing

SHARON GREEN

90

permission to so much as blink- You'll still be able to do
what's needed on me expedition, but then you'll have to
be allowed to do it—by Rikkan Addis. 1 know exactly how
much you'll enjoy something like that.11                        '_•

I sat up fast to glare at him furiously, but that was about       [
the only thing I could do. Most people struggled simply to
leam to use spells, but Graythor was experienced enough       ^
to devise them. Experimentation always fell into the dan-        "'
gerous black area, but if you managed to survive you were       .^
powerful enough to do just about anything you pleased. I'd       |-
never be able to find a way around his spell, and he knew  ,    ^
it!                                                           ||

"And you'd better stop trying to antagonize him," the       g-
most powerful wizard of our time said, his image rising       ^
from the chair with no more than slight difficulty. "What-       ^
ever patience he had with you is just about gone now, and
if you continue to push him you'll certainly regret it. And
one more thing—''

"What now?" 1 asked when he paused, for some reason
looking as though he were searching for the right words-
"Have you decided the way 1 breathe in and out bothers
you?"

"That's closer to the truth than you know," he said, his
crooked smile bending his face and warming the dark of
his eyes. "Laciel, child, you've spent too much of the last
years locked away with Morgiana in her house, studying
and practicing and associating with very few people who
weren't of the Sighted. Morgiana is a wizard of great
power, and your potential is nothing short of enormous;

mat combination of factors tends to turn people, especially
men, somewhat diffident and circumspect. In the full mea-
sure of things, I'm afraid you're a good deal more inno-
cent than girls who are years your junior."

"Is all that supposed to mean something?" 1 asked,
having not the least idea what he was talking about. "And
I'm not at all innocent. I'm a full grown woman."

"You most certainly are a full grown woman," he
agreed with a sigh, beginning to look frustrated. "That,
specifically, is the reason for the problem. Your self-
image, however, hasn't been given me chance to change
from the scruffy waif Morgiana brought home with her, to

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

91

what you've now grown to become. The men of this
expedition aren't Sighted, child, which makes your poten-
tial meaningless to them, and they've never even heard of
Morgiana. All they have is their own sight, and you
mustn't believe everything they tell you. Morgiana will be
cross enough with me as it is; I certainly don't want to add
to it."

"Uncle Graythor, I haven't the faintest idea of what
you're talking about," I said. giving in to the need to
stretch out across the bed again. "Whatever this is, can we
discuss it some other time? I really am very tired."

"Possibly I should be the one to be cross with Morgiana,"
he muttered, shaking his head in annoyance and what
seemed like defeat. "She should have explained these
things to you long ago, not left them to a man who has
never had daughters of his own to caution. I think I'll have
to look for another way. You sleep now, and remember
what I said: the trail will grow progressively more danger-
ous, and you need to be protected so mat you can protect
everyone else. Know mat my blessing and hope is with
you every step of the way."

He raised one hand, more in benediction and farewell
than for magical purpose, and then his image was abruptly
gone. Probably to set that warding on Rikkan Addis, I
thought sourly, forcing myself to my feet in order to get
out of my clothes. Well, I might not be able to use magic
to take over leadership, but if there were some other way
I'd find it- I used the Sight to make sure there was nothing
living in my bed before crawling under the covers, vaguely
wondering what it was that I wasn't supposed to believe
when told by my male companions, men stopped wasting
my time. Graythor was very old, and sometimes old age
affects even wizards with strength like his. I snapped my
fingers to turn the lamp out, then snuggled down to think
about Zail and the dinner we still had ahead of us to share.

CHAPTER 4

The bloodcurdling scream snapped me out of sleep and
bolt upright, my eyes opening quickly enough to see Soffann
Dra just disappearing from the now-open door to my room.
I still wasn't awake enough to know what was happening,
but if we were under attack again the attacker had to be
invisible.

"She really should have knocked louder instead of sim-
ply walking in." a very familiar voice said from the floor
to the left of my bed, not five paces away from the door.
"That way she wouldn't have nearly stepped on me."

"InThig," I groaned, lying back down as the big, black,
feline head with blazing red eyes rose above the side of my
bed, it now being in a sitting position instead of stretched
out along the floor. "What are you doing here?"

"Graythor felt that my presence on this expedition will
be very helpful," it purred, enormously pleased with it-
self, red eyes unblinking in the small amount of lamplight
coming in from me hall. "Was that one of our companions?"

"Our companions," I muttered, hanging a forearm over
my eyes, still too jangled to make a more appropriate
comment. There were some people, I knew, who disliked
being awakened abruptly in the dark by the crowing of a
rooster greeting the approach of dawn; right then I wouldn't
have minded a batallion of roosters.

"Listen to all those running feet," InThig remarked, its
growl sounding interested and delighted. "Almost all booted,

Q1

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

93

f-

,B
^

I think, and definitely coming this way. This should be
bin."

"Fun!" I exclaimed, suddenly realizing what had to be
happening, pulling my arm from my eyes and sitting up
fast again. Those stampeding-herd sounds had to be com-
ing from the other members of the quest, rushing in to
save me from the horrible danger that had so frightened
Soffann Dra. I doubt if any of them truly believed 1
couldn't be in danger there, and that little incident was
about to make things ten times worse in the way of smoth-
ering protection than—

"There it is!" Rikkan Addis' voice came from the hall,
harder than it usually was and filled with command. "I'll
take it, and you two back me up."

"Wait a minute!" I yelped as his heavy, broad-bladed
sword came through the doorway with him right behind it,
snapping my fingers to light the room lamp. "You don't
understand! This isn't what—"

"Don't worry, girl, we won't let it hurt you," he
interrupted, his eyes narrowed against the sudden light, but
all his attention still on InThig. The demon gazed back at
him calmly, a grin of amusement bringing to sight the two
rows of sharp, dangerous teeth, its mouth was filled with,
and a hiss of caution came from the doorway just behind
the slowly advancing man.

"See how it snarls in preparation for attack," Kadrim
pointed out, his own sword low to keep from stabbing
fearless leader in the back, but alertly ready for all of that.

"We ought to get Laciel out of there first, just in case it
turns suddenly and attacks her," Zail put in from where he
stood beside Kadrim in the doorway, his sword held the
way the boy's was. "Even a dying beast can cause a lot of
damage."

"You may be right," fearless leader agreed without turning
to look at Zail, stopping where his very slow advance had
brought him. "Any movement on her part might cause the
thing to attack, but it seems to be centering on me right
now. See if you can slip out of the other side of that bed,
girl, and if it doesn't go after you, try to work your way
around until you're behind me."

"This is ridiculous," I announced while InThig chuck-

SHARON GREEN

94

led, the sound of it causing the three men to bring their
swords up a little more. "If you think I'm getting out of
this bed stalk naked, you're out of your mind. If you'll
just listen to me for a minute ..."

"Saving your modesty at the expense of your life would
be stupid," fearless leader interrupted again, annoyance
tmgeing the low growl in his voice. ' 'Get out of that bed,
and I mean now."

InThig's chuckling turned to low, chill-making laughter,
enough to cause Rikkan Addis to look as though he wanted
to take one step back, and I'd absolutely had it. Everyone
was having a grand old time at my expense, but party time
was over. I continued to hold me patch-quilt to me as I sat
straighter in the bed, and glared around at everyone
concerned.

"1 am going to say this only once in this language, and
if 1 have to repeat myself it will be in words none of you
will like," I said through my teeth. "I am not getting out
of this bed because 1 am n^r in any danger. InThig is
getting a real kick out of mis, but I am not. I don't need
your protection and I don't want it, so you can all go back
to wherever you were."

"InThig?" Rikkan Addis echoed with a frown, his eyes
still on die laughing demon. "Who or what is InThig?"

"That's hiThig," I said with a gesture and a lot of
disgust, wishing it were possible to touch demons with
magic. "Graythor decided we needed it with us, and it
decided to have some innocent fun with its new compan-
ions. It has that son of a sense of humor."

"I merely wished to see how well they would take my
presence," InThig protested mildly, completely phony in-
jured innocence in its tone. "They certainly are a coura-
geous lot, to be prepared so quickly and completely to
confront the unknown."

"You might not have thought our courage that admira-
ble if we'd simply attacked," Rikkan Addis pointed out
with increased annoyance as he sheathed his sword, Zail
shaking his head with a sigh while Kadrim stood blinking
and staring. "Once you put a sword in someone, all you
can do afterward is apologize while the blood flows out."

"But I don't have any blood," InThig answered with

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

95

another chuckle, still enjoying itself. "Your weapons aren't
capable of hurting me, so it wouldn't have mattered even
if you had attacked. Laciel knows that, but I do believe it
slipped her mind for a moment."

The big, black head turned and those two blazing red
eyes were on me, but I pretended to ignore them. I had
forgotten for a moment that InThig couldn't be hurt, but I
didn't want it reading things into a temporary memory
lapse.

"Well, now that the crisis is over, maybe Laciel will do
us the favor of getting dressed and joining us at break-
fast," Rikkan Addis said, already heading for the door,
"It's more than time we were on our way."

Zail and Kadrim retreated before his striding advance,
and an instant later the door was pulled closed behind
them, leaving nothing in his wake but thick silence. InThig
was still staring at me, however, as demons never can
leave their points unmade.

"I'm flattered that you were worried about me," it said,
the previous smugness back in its voice, its purr making it
seem like an overgrown housecat "Not many people can
be bothered with being concerned over a demon, so you
must like me no matter how^often you try to get rid of
me."

"Being used to having someone around is not the same
as liking them," I pointed out in an effort to dent the
smugness, throwing me quilt aside so that 1 might get up.
"Besides, if anything happened to you, Morgiana would
be upset."

"Of course," InThig murmured, grinning to match the
increased blaze in its eyes, its purr of contentment un-
changed even as I turned my back on it. "How silly of me
to be so mistaken."

I suppose I was waiting for it to continue bothering me,
but happily it seemed to have said everything it wanted to.
I was able to get back into my clothes in the midst of
pleasing quiet, admiring (he way Graythor's refreshing
spell had turned my clothes beautifully clean and new
overnight. The others would have found me same thing
done to their clothes, which meant no one needed to carry
any changes. We'd get very tired of those outfits long

96

SHARON GREEN

before the quest was finished, but it cut down on the need
for extra baggage—not to mention the possibility that I
might have to disguise us in some of the worlds we'd be
going to. Disguising one outfit each would be no big deal,
but six wardrobes full . . .

As soon as I was dressed I took the room key and left,
snapping out the light before closing and locking the door.
InThig padded silently beside me, its movement more flow
than walk, the red eyes taking in everything, its big head
beside my right elbow. I could remember a time when
InThig had been almost my size. but that hadn't lasted
very long. Morgiana had originally summoned it as a
companion for herself, but that hadn't lasted very long
either. . . .

Everyone was downstairs in the inn's main room around
one of the plank tables, the serving girl having just brought
another two heaping platters of something hot to add to
what was already there. When I paused at me bar to return
the room key the innkeeper paled and closed his eyes. his
lips moving soundlessly in what was probably a prayer,
and the serving girl gasped, put one hand to her head, then
immediately fled the room. I couldn't help sighing as ljust
left the key on the bar and headed for the table, beginning
to be annoyed with Graythor for having sent InThig to the
inn instead of having it meet us at the gate. I'd almost
forgotten how untalented people reacted to the sight of a
demon, but I had a feeling I would soon be well reminded.

"Good morning, Laciel," Zail greeted me, rising from
his chair at the big, round table and gesturing toward the
empty place to his right, his attitude saying nothing at all
unusual had happened that morning. "Did you sleep well?"

"Very well, thank you," I answered pleasantly—if the
least bit softly, taking the chair he held for me. To my
right was Kadrim, to his right Su, to Zail's left Soffann
Dra, and between the two women Rikkan Addis. Kadrim
smiled at me as I sat, ignoring InThig the way Zail was
doing, but Su inspected my new companion with curiosity,
and Soffann Dra did the same with wariness. Only Rikkan
Addis continued to fill his plate from the platters of food
standing around, ignoring my arrival as though 1 were

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

97

invisible or unSeen. If I hadn't been so hungry, I might
have spent some time being thoroughly annoyed.

"You really must have been exhausted last night," Zail
said as he sat again and reached for a platter of steaks to
pass to me. "When dinner was ready I came to your door
and knocked, but there was no answer and the light was
out."

"I, too, came to your door, to continue the discussion
we had not completed on the road," Kadrim said, ready to
take the platter of steaks and replace it with one piled high
with eggs. "Although I knocked as well, I also found no
response."

"1 don't remember hearing either one of you," I said,
giving Zail the eggs and reaching myself for the fried
potatoes. "I feel fine now, though, so sleeping like the
dead obviously helped. Now all I have to do is replace the
meal I missed."

With which comment I immediately began to dig in,
pausing after a moment to take a slab of bread and butter. I
felt hollow all the way through, and the men on either side
of me took the hint and left conversation for another time.
We all worked silently at fueling ourselves for the upcom-
ing day's travels, and it wasn't ^ntil almost everything was
gone and the last of me coffee .had been poured that
Soffann Dra broke mat silence.

"Doesn't your—friend—need anything to eat?" she
asked, moving her head a little to look at InThig where it
lay stretched out on the floor behind my chair, "I hope
you don't take this wrong, but I really dislike the thought
of him being hungry."

"InThig's an it, not a him," I corrected, letting another
swallow of coffee push the food I'd eaten down where it
belonged. "And it doesn't eat, at least not the way we do,
so you don't have to worry. When it's hungry, it goes
home to eat."

"Oh," she said, her tone wavering between relief and
disbelief, not quite sure which way to go. She wanted to
think I was telling the truth, but was still too uneasy to put
complete trust in something that might not be so. If that
was the worst difficulty InThig's presence caused among
me six of us, though, I would be very, very happy.

98

SHARON GREEN

By mutual consent, we didn't do much dawdling over
the coffee. The first rays of the new day were just begin-
ning to light and brighten the landscape when we went out
to get the horses, and 1 had my first job of the day. Our
mounts reacted to InThig the way the innkeeper and the
serving girl had, but with more volume and violence; I had
to speak a spell to keep them from bolting and leaving us
afoot. After that they were no longer aware of InThig's
presence, but InThig got a lot of fun out of the incident.
Demons are always amused when people and animals
panic at the sight of them, which accounts for some of the
legends concerning them. The reason they're that amused
is something no one knows for sure, but I suspect it has to
do with their life-places in their own world-dimension.
Sort of like, "Are they really afraid of me?" As humans
would find it impossible to survive in their world, the
matter continues to be one for speculation.

We followed the road through the woods for less than an
hour, and then Su turned off it to lead the way through the
trees. There wasn't the least sign of a trail or path or
anything to show we were heading in the right direction,
but none of us had any doubt. Until then Kadrim and Zail
had ridden to either side of me, their conversation light
and their attention to our surroundings heavy, but once we
were off the road it was strictly single file. Su led the way
with Rikkan Addis behind her, Soffann Dra following
him, then Zail in front of me and Kadrim bringing up the
rear. InThig ranged through the trees on its own to our
right, a silent, blackly flowing shadow, and somehow the
woods felt friendlier having it there.

No more than fifteen or twenty minutes later Su stopped,
at a place that seemed to the naked eye no different from
any other spot in the forest. The early-morning sun was
slanting down through the leaves above and birds sang in
the upper reaches, but closer to the ground there was no
forest life, nothing to disturb the bright, pulsating slit I
could See between two of the trees. No human or animal
could have gone through that slit without the help of a
Sighted, but the woods-dwellers still avoided the spot;

sometimes I have the feeling that all animals are Sighted,

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

99

and those unSighted who feel the greatest affinity for
them are closest to the state themselves.

"Can't see the trail any more," Su was saying to Rikkan
Addis, who had ridden up to halt his roan beside her paint.
"Stops right mere between those trees, and doesn't start
up again."

"Then this must be it," he said, glancing around a little
before turning to look at me over his shoulder. "Is this
where the gate is, girl?"

"Just ahead of you, between those two trees," I an-
swered, urging my gray past Zail and Soffann Dra to join
the head of the column. "I'll have to help Su go through
first, so that we transfer to the proper world. Everyone
dismount and get ready; this might take some doing."

"You're expecting problems?" Rikkan Addis asked, his
frown making itself known in his voice since we were all
too busy climbing off our mounts to look at him. "I
thought you were good enough to handle this easily."

"If I were alone, I could handle it easily," I answered,
annoyed but too deep in juggling possibilities for him to
distract me. I dropped my reins to keep my gray standing
where 1 left him and walked closer to the gate, aware of
the way ^—folded—on the inside, each fold going in a
different direction. Choosing "among the folds was not
difficult at all; moving others to one of those folds without
going through myself was going to be the hard part. 1 had
to be on this side of the gate to help the others in and on
the other side of the gate to help them out again, both at
the same time. Either I would have to escort each one of
them through separately, the end of which would leave me
needing two nights' worth of sleep-like-the-dead, or I could—

"All right, here's how we'll do it," I announced as
soon as the decision was made, turning to look at them.
"The fastest and easiest thing we can do is form a chain
through the gate, with Su on the left, one of you men on
the right, and me as the central link. That way the rest of
you can just pass right through with the horses, and I
won't have to go back and forth half a dozen times. With
me right in the middle of the gate, it will stay open."

"Why do you need a chain?" Rikkan Addis asked, those

100 SHARON GREEN

bronze eyes glowing faintly with curiosity. "Why can't you
simply stand in the gate alone?"

"Gates aren't made for standing in," I answered, im-
patient to get on with it but seeing that the others had the
same question. "They tend to draw you through once
you've entered them, so I have to be anchored. Is every-
one ready?"

"Just a minute," old fearless leader balked, part of his
frown back. "I can see why Su has to go through first, but
what happens if there's a welcoming committee on the
other side? How can she defend herself if she has to help
anchor you?"

"The answer to that is, she can't," I said, speaking
slowly and carefully so the man would have no trouble
understanding what would have been obvious to any real
leader. "That's why InThig will be going through right
behind her,, on its own, to stand protection until the rest of
us make it. Did you think Graythor added it to this expedi-
tion just to give it new victims for its sense of humor?"

My adversary's head came up, as though he didn't quite
care for something I'd said, but that wasn't the time or the
place to continue the discussion and he seemed to know it.
Rather than giving voice to whatever was bothering him,
he opted instead for giving orders.

"Kadrim, I think you'd better be the anchor on this
side," he told the red-haired boy without looking at him,
that bronze stare still all mine. "Zail, you'll go through
behind InThig, Soffann Dra after you, and then me, we mice
leading all the horses. As soon as we clear the gate, Kadrim,
get yourself and the girl through as fast as possible."

"Also shall I be on the alert for any who might appear
behind us," Kadrim said with full agreement, ignoring the
near-growl with which he'd been addressed. "At the mo-
ment it appears that we are alone, therefore does it seem
best that we hurry."

"Couldn't have said it better myself," I commented to
Kadrim with a smile, then gestured to Su and the boy to join
me very near the gate. Su stopped no more than half a pace
back from it, probably guided by where the trail she was
following ended, and when I reached her 1 put my left
hand up.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        101

"Su, you take my hand and we'll move into the gate
together, but I'll be edging in sideways," I told her,
looking up at her calm brown eyes. "When you know
which world we want simply move toward it, but don't let
go of my hand. That way I'll be able to open the gate for
you on the other side without passing through it myself,
and Kadrim will keep me from being drawn through. Once
you're on the other side, hold tight to make sure I don't
get drawn back."

"Don't have to worry I'll let go," she answered, flash-
ing me a quick, faintly amused grin. "Don't want to be
left over there all by myself. Let's get to it."

She took my left hand with her left, waited until Kadrim
had my right hand in his left, then all of us moved
cautiously forward. The gate sensed my presence and ex-
panded sideways, the slit becoming a glowing curtain that
stretched between the two trees, even me ground beneath it
beginning to glow. The horses snorted and moved behind
us, clearly startled by the unexpected happening but not
really afraid, their reactions reinforcing my belief concern-
ing animals and magic. The gate was open and ready, and
the horses, at least, knew it.

Su, however, had no idea of what was happening until
we actually stepped through the gate-. She gasped then and
tightened her grip on my hand, most likely dizzied by all
the folds and choices among worlds. Gates glowed much
more brightly on the inside, and once in you didn't have to
be Sighted to perceive the brightness. Universes seemed to
be rushing by in that glow, and it took a while even for the
Sighted to get used to it.

"Just concentrate on the trail," I told Su gently, my
voice sounding odd in the silent rushing of the glow.
"You should be able to see it again now, and then all we
have to do is follow it."

"Yes . . . there!" she gasped, still strangling my hand,
and then she was stumbling toward one particular fold. I
made sure to See which fold it was just in case, and then
Su was through it into the next world-dimension, my hand,
arm and shoulder through with her. I felt the pull of the
fold trying to draw the rest of me along with the first, but
Kadrim's big hand held to mine behind, and Su's grip kept

102 SHARON GREEN

that part of me from snapping back. I was anchored in the
gate, and InThig bounded through so fast all I caught was
a glimpse of black.

A moment later Zail appeared, leading his horse and
Su's, his eyes widening as he became aware of the inner
gate. The dizziness didn't take him as badly as it had Su,
most likely because the chain was stabilizing a good part
of the confusion, but the central link of that chain wasn't
taking her position as easily as she thought she would. My
body had begun hurting from being pulled in two opposite
directions, my head was starting to throb in time to the
pulse of the glow. and I was getting queasy. When Zau
glanced at me, some of the awe left his expression.

"Are you all right?" he demanded, his flattened voice
full of his frown. He seemed to want to say more than
that, but talking in a gate isn't very—comfortable.

"Yes," I answered, speaking more in general than
specifically, but had to add, "Hurry."

Zail wasted no further time on questions, for which I
was grateful. He led the horses straight through into the
fold, and then it was Soffann Dra entering, followed by
her horse and mine. The small, dark-haired woman gasped
and paled, and she, at least, didn't have to be hurried. She
moved through the gate as fast as it's possible to go while
leading two horses, her head down, her eyes nearly closed,
and then it was Rikkan Addis' turn. Fearless leader entered
the gate in front of his horse and Kadrim's, his bronze
eyes narrowing at what he saw, and then his gaze found
me. A peculiar expression crossed his face and his left
hand came up, as though he were going to touch me, but
men he -stopped himself, turned away, and pulled the
horses through the fold behind him.

I could now hear sounds of some sort, soft and very
distant, as though coming from the other folds all around.
It was neither warm nor cold in the gate but 1 could feel
beads of sweat on my forehead, and something was inter-
fering with my vision. I kept getting flashes of scenes mat
weren't there before me, scenes of landscape and sea-
scape, mountains and valleys, hot sunshine and shivery
snows. People and animals of all sorts inhabited the scenes,
and each one seemed to be calling and pulling at me. I

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        103

gasped for air, finding it almost as hard to breathe as it had
been in the Plane of Dreams, and me whirling in my head
began turning even faster. I gasped again, feeling my
knees begin to buckle—and then it was all gone and ! was
being carried in two muscular arms, my body no longer
being torn apart, my hands now free. For an instant I
thought me chain had broken and 1 struggled, but then I
was being put down in thick, soft grass and my eyes
opened to see that everyone was there.

"Just take it slow for a minute," Rikkan Addis said
from where he half-knelt beside me, the glow in those eyes
looking as strange as his expression in the gate had. "We're
all through and everything's all right, so you can rest as
long as you have to."

I closed my eyes again and simply breathed, knowing it
wasn't rest mat I needed. Standing in the gate hadn't been
as draining as going back and forth through it would have
been, but it also wasn't the most pleasurable of experiences.
After three or four breaths I became aware of the thick
grass on which I lay, the heavy, woodsy smell in the air all
around, the sparkling warmth of sunshine, the sound of
birds singing; by then the visions and sounds of the gate
had begun to recede into faint memories.

"I hadn't expected that, but I suppose it's logical," I
muttered, putting one hand to my head as I opened my eyes
again. "If the folds can't simply draw you into one of
them, they start trying harder in other ways. I wonder if
it'll be easier next time, now that I know what's coming."

"Perhaps, next time, it would be best if 1 were to stand
beside you within the gate," Kadrim said, crouching down
to my right to take my hand again, a faint smile on his
handsome young face. "When I came through you were
nearly in a swoon, and I found it necessary to support you
me few steps to the far side. I would not wish to see you in
such difficulty again."

"Unfortunately, my friend, you're needed as one of the
anchors," Zail said to the boy before I could answer, his
own crouch to my left putting him close enough to take my
other hand. "It looks like I'll have to be the one to stand
with her, lending her support until everyone has passed
through."

104

SHARON GREEN

Zail had smiled at Kadrim before bringing those pretty
gray eyes to me while helping me to a seated position, and
Kadrim's eyes had hardened in response, as though he
blamed Zait for speaking nothing but the truth. I didn't
know what was going on between them, but before I could
ask, InThig was suddenly sitting at my feet.

"It would be interesting to see one of you attempt
that," it said to both men, looking between them and
grinning its amusement. "Laciel, being Sighted and hav-
ing power to call on, was able to maintain her position
inside the gate. Were one of you others to try the same,
you would be swept away nearly at once—and unable to
exit from any other gate. She can hold you going through,
but not if you stand around sightseeing or keeping her
company. That's what makes taking the unSighted through
a gate so difficult. If the Sighted doesn't hold on tight, the
gate takes its turn."

Kadrim and Zail were now staring at InThig, their ex-
pressions peculiar, but that seemed to be the day for odd
expressions. I hadn't wanted to break the news to them
quite that abruptly, not after they were nice enough to
volunteer their help, but tact isn't a word often found in a
demon's vocabulary. Instead of letting them down gently he
had dropped them off a mountainside, and there was noth-
ing I could do about it right then but change the subject.

"I think it's time we got back on the road," I said,
retrieving my hands easily from the two loosened grips
before getting to my feet. "We still have a long way to

go."

"There is no road," Rikkan Addis pointed out, back to
looking all around himself. We seemed to be in a wide
clearing, almost a meadow, and all around were very big,
very old trees. "This is the world without any people, isn't
it? The one the wizard told us to be very alert in?"

"I can sense animal and plant life," InThig told him,
padding over to where the man stood and glancing at him
before joining in the looking around. "If there's human
life as well, it's out of my sensing range."

"Don't waste any time letting me know if that changes,"
Rikkan Addis said, fearless leader instructing one of his
followers without a second thought, glancing down at

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

105

InThig as though he'd known the demon all his life.
"Aside from us, anything human on this world will have
only one reason for being here. Let's get mounted and
moving.''

Everyone began moving toward the horses at mat, re-
sponding to his orders as enthusiastically as they'd ignored
mine, something that set me thinking even as automatic
annoyance flared. Now that we'd gone through the gate it
was time to start doing something about taking over lead-
ership of the expedition, but just as Graythor had sug-
gested, few of the others seemed ready to accept my orders
unless magic was involved—and magic was something 1
couldn't use against ol' feariess leader. I didn't yet know
how I could manage the takeover, but it was clear I'd have
to do it ^st before everyone got too used to having that
impossible man directing us. Habit was a hard creature to
best, and as 1 moved toward my gray I glared at InThig; if
even demons were subject to it 1 really did have to hurry.
but somehow I had the feeling it had ranged itself with
Rikkan Addis for another reason. With Graythor having
sent it, I didn't have to wonder long as to what that other
reason could be-
Even without a road, the trail continued to be clear to
Su. We followed her out of the'meadow and in among the
trees, everyone probably wondering privately why we had
to be so alert in so pleasant a place. There was nothing to
show that humans had ever before passed where we rode,
and that sense of being all alone in a lovely, green, virgin
wilderness was soothing as well as exhilarating. Graythor
had refused to be specific about what we were supposed" to
be alert against, saying that expecting one particular type
of attack would leave us open to the unexpected sort. If we
were alert against everything and anything, it should be
that much harder to surprise us. I could see the logic in
that line of reasoning, but the look of the landscape was
working against it; if there had been a specific threat we
could brace against, it would have kept us from getting too
comfortable.

"Laciel, girl. how do you fare?" a deep voice asked
from my right, drawing me out of introspection. Kadrim
had been riding behind me and Zail was deep in conversa-

io6

SHARON GREEN

tion with Rikkan Addis up ahead, but now the red-haired
boy had moved up to ride beside me.

"Now that I'm out of that gate, I'm fine," I told him
with a smile, seeing how those blue eyes examined me to
be sure I was telling the truth. "I never got the chance to
thank you for carrying me out of there."

"Merely did I assist you out, and for so little a thing
there is no need of thanks," he answered, matching my
smile as he looked down at me. "Once out it was Rik who
took you, for he had anticipated your need and waited just
beside the gate. As you are happily no longer in distress, I
will come to you once we have made darkness camp, and
we shall be able to continue our dis—"

"What do you mean, it was Rik who took me?" I
interrupted, feeling sudden outrage cover me like a cape.
"What gave him the right to come anywhere near me, let
alone touch me? How did he dare. . . !"

"It is surely a leader's right to see to those who follow
him," the boy interrupted in turn, for some reason show-
ing amusement .in those steady blue eyes. "As you con-
tinue to follow him much like the rest of us, there was no
call for him to refrain from doing as he wished. Perhaps,
should we seek for it this darkness, we will discover a
means to . . ."

"Change that state of affairs," 1 finished in what was
nearly a growl, nodding my head as I turned it to glare at
fearless leader's back. "Even if it takes all night."

"Even should it take the entire darkness," Kadrim agreed
in a murmur, a smile behind the smoothness of his tone.
"1 would, however, refrain from speaking of this to the
others, most particularly Zail. That one spends a good deal
of time with Rik, and should he inadvertently let slip a
premature hint of what you intend— To me they appear to
be quite close."

"Oh, but Zail would never take Rik's side against me,"
I protested, looking again at me very large boy. "He's
already said he doesn't like the way fearless leader treats
me, and he has no choice about conferring with him in
relation to the quest. If I don't tell him, he'll mink I don't
trust him."

"Should he fail to be told of me discussion we intend,

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        107

the question of trust will not arise," the boy pointed out,
that very faint smile back on his face. "Should you speak
of the matter now, you will only cause him to realize that
there were previous discussions of which he was not a
part. And also do ! wish to speak of another matter this
darkness, the matter I previously referred to. It will bring
you as great a delight as it brings to me, I feel, yet would I
prefer that you alone be told of it at this time. Will you
agree to have it so?"

I bit my lip at the question and looked in Zait's direction
again, but everything Kadrim had said was true, and I had
already agreed to listen to his secret any time he was ready
to tell it. I don't believe in going back on promises to
friends, but I had been so looking forward to that
dinner. . . .

"Tonight it will be just the two of us," I conceded with
as much of a smile as I could manage, forcing my eyes
away from Zail and back to my big, young friend. "You
have my word on it."

"You seem to wish it were otherwise, yet shall I take
the sadness from you with what I will say." he assured
me, seeing what I hadn't wanted him to see. "You will
find that the men of other worlds are not so blind as those
of your own, nor so backward. Have I told you that the
first woman to take my heart was much like yourself?"

"Why—no," I answered, surprise coming to cover me
confusion I felt over the rest of what he'd said. "You
sound as though you really have had dozens of women—if
not hundreds. You also make it sound as though you met
your first woman a very long time ago."

"A lifetime has passed in the interim," he said very
softly, his face now expressionless, his sight turned inward
with loss. "Her appearance was not like yours, for she
was small with hair as red as my own, yet was she bright
and alive and filled with the fire of a woman of pride—yet
also innocent and in need of great gentleness. I loved her
as a drowning man loves solid ground, as a suffocating
man me breath of life; had I been called upon to give my
life for hers, it would have been my pleasure and joy to do
so. It was she, however, who gave her life for mine, and
never will 1 forget the moment of it- It gave her great joy

108 SHARON GREEN

to know I was unharmed, yet when she died in my arms
the joy of the world died with her."

"How did it happen?" I asked in a very unsteady voice,
my throat tightening in echo to his whisper. Those hard
blue eyes were completely dry, but only because he was
the sort to keep tears strictly on the inside. "Was there an
accident of some sort?"

"More stupidity than accident," he said with a sharp
shake of his head, old anger fighting to free itself. "My
enemies were not many for they seldom survived our
meeting to continue as enemies, yet was mere one who
lacked the stomach to face me. Had I been wise I would
have sought him out and slain him, yet did I feel then that
such a doing would be dishonorable. I allowed him to live
so long as he kept from me and mine—which lasted till he
approached unseen, with a bow. The shaft was meant for
my back—and took her, instead, between the breasts
when she threw herself in its path. My enemy's death,
when I tracked him down at last, was neither swift nor
easy, yet does revenge fall short as a means to replace that
which has been lost. A lifetime of loneliness had already
passed by then. and each day thereafter brought more of
the same."

He was back to looking straight at me by then, a steady,
unwavering blue gaze that left me with nothing to say. It
hurt to know that someone so young had had so terrible a
loss, and right then I felt very close to Kadrim. I reached
over to touch his arm, trying to make him know without
words that I understood how he felt, and a faint smile
returned to his face.

"She, too, would have shared my loss in such a way,'*
he said, his voice still soft. "I was not mistaken in seeing
me similarity between you."

"The similarity between who?" another voice asked, a
much more open and friendly voice. We both looked
around to see that Zail now rode to my left, and his smite
warmed when I quickly withdrew my hand from Kadrim's
arm.

"Kadrim was just telling me about someone he once
knew," I said rather quickly, half to keep the boy from
being hurt by having the subject rehashed once again, and

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        109

half to reassure Zait that my touching Kadrim hadn't meant
anything. "He and 1 are friends, you know."

"Friends," Zail said with even more of a smile, glanc-
ing with what seemed like amusement at Kadrim. "When
you're young it's important to have friends you can count
on, and I'm sure Kadrim knows he can count on you—and
the rest of us as well. Even though our own friendship has
become a good deal more special. We'll make up tonight
for that dinner we missed last night, just we two special
friends."

"Zait," I began, trying to think of some way to tell him
that I couldn't have dinner with him that night even though
1 really wanted to, without sounding as though I were
making excuses. I looked ahead to where Soffann Dra now
rode with Rikkan Addis, both of them chuckling over
something, without finding any inspiration, and then Kadrim
decided to save me the trouble.

"Laciel will be in my company this darkness, friend
Zail." he said, the smoothness of his voice somehow
taking the amusement that had abruptly left the other man-
*'0ur friendship may not yet be as special as yours with
her, but perhaps the darkness will bring about a change—
for the better. I hope. She ha& given her word on the
matter.''

"You made her give you her word?" Zail asked, his
gray eyes more than annoyed as they rested on Kadrim.
"You took advantage of her, and now you're crowing
about it? When it comes to dealing properly with women,
my young friend, you still have a lot to learn."

"It is scarcely I who means to take advantage," Kadrim
came back. his head high and his blue eyes a good deal
colder, his voice losing quite a lot of friendliness. "Never
have I forced myself on innocence with overwhelming
words meant to dazzle and blind, with no more than one
end in mind. A few words of honest praise indicating
sincere interest, perhaps, and then ..."

"And then on to the next name on the list," Zail cut in
with a snort of scorn, his eyes and voice also growing
colder. "Any one of those names will do, and they're
forgotten as soon as they're checked off. But some of us
are capable of having a vision of perfection, an ideal

SHARON GREEN

no

which raises one name far above all others, the culmina-
tion of all he's ever searched for in one single, slender
form. That's me one worth striving for, the one to win no
matter what has to be done to . . ."

"To achieve one's own purpose?" Kadrim took his turn
at interrupting, a distant, regal sneer in his stiffened atti-
tude. "Even should it not be best for the one striven for?
And once that one is achieved, then what? A short time of
pleasure and self-indulgence, and then the realization that
the ideal is no longer quite as ideal, perhaps? A true man
advances his cause with a view toward sharing, of himself
as well as all things which are ..."

I was getting dizzy looking back and forth between
them, but the next interruption became me last. An ear-
piercing scream sounded that even startled the horses, and
then we were all in the middle of what had caused the
scream, a vocalization of the understandable terror felt by
Soffann Dra. A vine from one of the trees had whipped
down to wrap around her where she rode next to Rikkan
Addis, trying (o unseat her, trying to draw her back into
the trees with it. The man had drawn his sword and
slashed the vine through, but we'd all automatically reined
in and now there were other vines after us! It was too late
to try riding away from the attack, and even the horses
were being threatened.

Zail, Kadrim and Su had their blades unsheathed only
an instant behind Rik's, and the flurry of whispering swings
was almost lost behind the high-pitched whining coming
from the trees all around us. The forest world was still as
bright and beautiful and peaceful as it had been, which
made it all a good deal worse than dank, threatening dark
would have been. Kadrim grunted as he swung his weapon
and Zail cursed in a low, furious voice; me horses were
snorting and shivering, picking up the fear so thick around
them.

And then a vine wrapped itself around me from behind,
sticky sap dripping from it onto my clothes and flesh, tiny
suckers searching for skin to attach to, strong as the arm of
a well-muscled man. I gasped and shuddered as it began
tightening around my arms, knowing it was ready to pull me
back into the forest to whatever was waiting, and horror

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        III

and disgust finally forced me out of shock and into action.
For some reason revulsion had frozen me till then, but that
wasn't the time to be fastidious.

A single word caused the vine around me to shrivel to
black dust, faintly increasing the whine in the trees all
around, and that told me what 1 needed to know. The trees
and vines feared something too, and that was the best
weapon with which to fight them. I composed a three word
spell and then spoke it. Seeing me blazing swords as they
flamed to life all around us, watching their flickering
edges sever and shrivel every vine in their reach, following
them as they darted around searching for more antagonists
to touch. The presence of edged steel hadn't bothered the
vines, but my swords were made of fire that burned hotter
and hotter. The vines withdrew from the attack with a
whining shriek that could be felt in your bones, panic-
stricken at the thought of what could happen if even one
sap-covered vine stayed too long in contact with those
fiery weapons. In minutes the entire forest would be ablaze,
and the trees had a lot more to worry about on that score
than we did. We could always retreat to the gate, and wait
until sheets of flame cleared the way for us.

"Let's get out of here fast'",Rikkan Addis called from
up ahead, his sword still in his fist, and that was an idea
none of us cared to dispute. The horses leaped ahead when
we put our heels to their flanks, needing urging from
nothing but recent memory.

After a while we reined in the horses from a gallop, but
we didn't dawdle and I kept the swords of fire whirling
around over our heads. Some of the forest we rode through
seemed to—draw away—from the circling swords, but it
was difficult telling if those parts were merely withdrawing
from the heat, or would have attacked if we were unpro-
tected. To be perfectly honest, I had no interest in finding
out; the thought of hostile vegetation has always been able
to make me shudder, and I preferred the drain on my
strength due to keeping the swords above us, to the consid-
eration of what might come at us if I sent them back to
nothingness.

It seemed to be only a little past noon when we found a
place to stop for lunch. Fearless leader had already turned

112 SHARON GREEN

thumbs down on three previous places, ones he said looked
a little too pleasant and inviting, but we were all hungry
and the horses needed to rest and graze. With a great deal
of reluctance he let us stop in what wasn't really a clear-
ing, only a place where there were fewer bushes and no
low-hanging trees, and after he had looked around we
were allowed to dismount—with strict orders not to wan-
der off alone for any reason at all. Someone else might
have felt stupid saying something like that in a place like
the one we were in, but not ol' fearless leader; looking or
sounding stupid never seemed to bother him.

It was time to put a fence around the horses and conjure
us some food, so I reluctantly let the swords of fire go. 1
could have maintained mem while doing the rest, but mat
would have been an even greater drain on strength that was
more than adequate but still limited. We still had a lot of
hours left to spend on that world, and no way of knowing
what was ahead of us.

"I hope the grass doesn't do them any harm," Rikkan
Addis muttered^ staring at the horses through the fence I'd
put up as everyone else gathered around me. This time I'd
erected a normal fence with a gate that anyone could get
through—just in case we needed to get to the horses fast
and I was too occupied with other things to open or banish
a magical fence. "I don't like or trust anything on this
world."

"That's why I put my own grass inside the fence," I
said without more than a glance for him, shaking my head
just a little as I rubbed at the knots in my shoulder. "Fear
not, fearless leader, I'm not about to let us get left afoot.
Okay, now everybody step back a little."

They all did as I'd instructed, so I spoke the spell that
produced the nicely stuffed picnic baskets, then gestured to
them to help themselves. It wasn't exactly a picnic outing
we were on, but the suggestion couldn't hurt and might
even help soothe everyone's digestion. The four went to
the two big baskets and began looking through them, but
there wasn't anything in the way of joking or light
converation while they were doing it. There hadn't been
conversation at alt since me attack, and all of them spent
as much time looking around as looking at the food.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

"3

We all found places in the grass around the baskets, and
once InThig came-out of the brush to pace silently all
around us, even Rikkan Addis was able to force himself to
relax enough to eat something. The vines had gone after
all of us but me demon, which was, at least to me,
perfectly understandable. InThig liked its cat-shape and
used it most of the time, but that didn't mean it was made
of the same thing real cats were. InThig wasn't usable prey
to the vines, and they had left it strictly alone. We worked
our way silently through the sandwiches and ale from the
baskets, most of us moving from automatic swallowing to
some small appreciation of what it was we were eating,
and then InThig stopped beside Rikkan Addis.

"I would recommend against too lengthy a halt here,"
it growled, putting those blazing red eyes on the man very
briefly before letting them go back to random searching.
"There's something odd about this place I can't quite
pinpoint, and the feeling grows stronger with each passing
moment. Perhaps I can't identify it because it's no threat
to a life form like myself.''

"But it is a threat to us," Rikkan Addis said at once,
throwing away what was left of his latest sandwich and
abandoning his ale as he rose immediately to his feet.
"We'd be stupid to wait around until it was ready to jump
on us. Let's get out of here."

Again no one argued with the suggestion, but even as
we all climbed to our feet and I banished what was left of
the food with a gesture, we discovered we were too late.
Su's breath sucked in with surprise and then she made a
sound of pain, one which quickly became a scream of
desperation. She was the only one among us who was
barefoot and bare-legged, which meant that the things
didn't have to pass boots and clothing before they reached
flesh. They came up out of the ground, pale white slugs
that appeared in the grass then immediately began climb-
ing us, a squishing sound accompanying them rather than
whining, an eagerness to cover us in their squirming,
slithering advance. Soffan Dra screamed too, but not be-
cause the slugs had reached the tops of her high boots
under her gown. The scream was just part of the general
reaction to the swarming things, an equivalent to the sick-

SHARON GREEN

ened, cursing shouts of the men as they frantically brushed
at themselves.

I might have been on the slow side with the other
attacks, but slugs and maggots had shared a tot of my food
while I was growing up, before Morgiana found me. They
were more familiar to me than they were to most people,
which meant I didn't waste any time being horrified or
disgusted. Two words banished the slugs already crawling
on us, and a word of power forced the ones on the ground
to freeze where they were. That didn't slop newcomers
from squeezing up through the grass all around the frozen
ones, but at least it gave us something of a break. I looked
quickly around at everyone, seeing how Kadrim had hur-
ried over to Su and had lifted her quickly off the ground to
keep her from being covered again, and shouted the single
word, "Run!"

This time 1 was obeyed almost before the word was out
of my mouth, and if we didn't all go at top speed, that was
only because of what our feet were coming down on. I
banished the gate to the fence as we struggled through the
mess, saving us from having to stop and open it or climb
over, and once inside the fence we found naming but
vegetation beneath our feet. Whether it was the grass I'd
substituted for what had originally grown there, or the fact
that all of us had been outside the fence that had made the
slugs appear there alone, I didn't know; none of us knew,
but mat didn't keep us from mounting as fast as we could
and getting ourselves out of there. I froze the slugs one
more time before our horses galloped through them, which
kept us from taking any unwanted company along with us.

We slowed the horses sooner this time, trying to save
what was left of their stamina after too short a rest and not
enough grazing, and it wasn't long before we were glad
we did- The insect swarms made them bolt even though 1
was able to screen us from being stung much, and once
we'd managed to slow them down, they were set off again
by the fruit suddenly dropped on us as though it were
being aimed. It's impossible to know how long we went
on like that, five minutes of peace and twenty of attack,
but I do remember a lull of sorts, between the birds diving
and the rootlets reaching for our horses' hooves, of nearly

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

"5

an hour. Our four sword-wielders spent almost as much
time and energy defending us as 1 did with magic, but the
one who seemed to be taking it all the worst was Soffann
Dra. She had thrown up once we were away from the
slugs, and continued to look like a powder-pale ghost from
men on.

At long, long last the forest opened onto a beautiful
meadow containing manicured grass and a really lovely
stream, and we six sat our horses staring at it in silence. It
was late afternoon and we were hot and sweaty from the
heat of the day, covered in filth from the vines, slugs, fruit
and so on, bitten and stung, and not far from dropping
from exhaustion. Aside from that, we didn't trust the look
of the meadow one little bit; it was too pretty and inviting,
and we were all remembering the lovely little glade we
would have ridden through if not for InThig. I shuddered
at the thought of what the grass in the glade had been
resting on, and my gray snorted, either in echo or in
sympathy.

*'Su, do we have any choice about going through it?"
Rikkan Addis asked after a minute, unfairly sounding as
though he wasn't tired at all- "We might be better off if
we went around."         *-

"Can't," Su answered, sounding more like I felt. "Don't
see the trail any farther ahead than around to the left of
that stream. Could be it ends there."

"At the next gate," Rikkan Addis said, causing some-
thing of a stir in the rest of us. The second world, accord-
ing to Graythor, had people, and I'd discovered that I'd
rather be attacked by people than things any day. Appar-
ently the others felt the same, but rather than start forward
at once, Rikkan Addis called softly, "InThig!"

The demon had been ranging out ahead of us again, but
it came gliding back at the sound of its name, a big, black
shadow flowing silently over the grass. InThig wasn't tired
at all, of course, and it knew exactly why it had been
called.

"I haven't been able to detect anything of particular
danger," it told Rikkan Addis, sitting cat-like as it looked
up at the man. "Our next gate is not far from that stream,
but for some reason it seems odd."

n6

SHARON GREEN

"Odd in what way?" the man asked, joining everyone
else in glancing in my direction- I. on the other hand, was
looking at InThig, dreading what its answer would be but
already half anticipating it.

"The gate didn't flare open when I approached it,"
InThig replied with a puzzled tone in its growl, turning
those red eyes to meet my gaze. "Gates always open for
me, and I don't understand what it means."

"It probably means the gate is timed," I supplied with a
groan, slumping in my saddle. "We'll have to wait a
certain amount of time until I can open it, but 1 won't
know how much time before I See the thing. Graythor
once told me it has something to do with the positioning of
me worlds it leads to, when those worlds are more man
usually far from the world you're leaving. This seems to
be a giant-step gate, and we can only hope its period is
hours rather than weeks or months."

That caused another stir among my companions, this
time accompanied by echoes of my original groan. We all
wanted to be off that world, but when we left was no
longer our choice:

"It looks like the best thing we can do is get over
there," Rikkan Addis decided aloud, his eyes already set
in that direction. "We'll worry about what to do next if
me period turns out to be unreasonably long. Before that,
worrying is a waste of time."

A touch of his heel sent his roan into a steady lope
toward the distant gate, InThig stretching just a little to
move out ahead of him, Su and Soffann Dra following just
behind. Zail and Kadrim kept to their places to either side
of me, but there was more of a grimness to them than what
had been holding them most of the day. They both now
seemed to consider it a personal insult that we would not
be leaving that world right away, and I didn't understand
why.

Riding across the meadow turned out to be totally un-
eventful, a pleasant change from the way the day had gone
until then. The stream was beautifully blue and sparkling
with fluffy bushes of various sizes here and there around
it, but none of us looked at it too closely as we rode by.
Everyone was just then more interested in the gate, and

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

II?

most of mem acted as though they expected to be able to
See it. Su knew where it was from where the trail ended,
but Rikkan Addis would have ridden right through the
glowing slit without knowing it if his roan hadn't slid
sideways when he tried. He looked around then to see
InThig stopped in front of the gate and me already begin-
ning to dismount, and finally got the message.

"How long before you'll know what its period is?" he
asked me, backing his roan before starting to dismount. "I
don't like me way this place feels."

"I'm afraid you'll just have to live with it for a while,"
I answered, putting my fists on my hips as I stared at the
glowing slit. "Its pulse is clearly declining, but it seems to
be on a short cycle. My guess is it's openable only in the
morning, so it looks like we'll be spending the night
here."

"Your guess," he echoed over a few moans and groans
from the others, his tone dissatisfied. "Is guessing the best
you can do? Can't you tell me something a little more
concrete?"

"If you think you can do any better yourself, go right
ahead," I offered, waving a hand at the slit with only
some of the annoyance I was reeling, aiming my head to
look directly at him. "It so happens 1 wasn't telling you
anything, just informing the group as a whole, so don't
take the disappointment so personally. And you don't have
to be that nervous about spending the night here. Once I
have our campsite warded, we'll be just fine."

His head went high as his eyes began to blaze, but 1 was
too hot and tired to wait for him to come up with words in
response to what I'd said. I'd used the opportunity to show
the others how little he had going for him as a leader, but I
wanted to get our camp set up and provisioned while I still
believed I had the strength to do it.

For that reason I turned immediately and walked away
from all of them, getting straight in my mind how much
room we would need for me camp, what we wanted to be
in it, where to put the horses and in what, dozens of items
and specifics that would then all have to be warded. It was
like juggling a giant puzzle in my head, all the clues and
answers in place, all the pieces locking tight, every hint

li8

SHARON GREEN

and suggestion picked up and fitted into the pattern; it
wasn't impossible, only difficult, the sort of difficulty that
had fascinated and delighted me from the moment I first
began learning about it. I closed my eyes for a moment,
wishing there was even a small breeze to cool the air, then
raised my arms and spoke the spells one after the other-

*'0h, look!" Soffann Dra gasped, delight in her voice
for the first time that day. "Look at those beautiful pavil-
ions! We'll be able to be comfortable tonight!"

There were murmurs of agreement and approval keeping
her observations company, and I wondered again why she
always had to speak in exclamation points. Right then I
was finding it just short of painful, but that wasn't the
woman's fault- I sat down in the grass and closed my eyes
again, but this time so that I could rub them with my
fingers.

"You all right?" Su's voice asked from above me just
before her hand touched my shoulder. "Didn't know you
had enough left to do all that after the kind of day we
had."

"Nothing to it," I answered, dropping my hands so that
I could look up at her where she bent over me. "I'll bet I
even have enough left right now to keep my eyes open
until I've washed in the stream and maybe had a bite or
two to eat. How about you?"

"Didn't think it was worth hoping we could wash," she
said with a tired grin, crouching so that she could rub at
her leg more easily. I'd neutralized as much of the slug
venom in her as I could after we'd ridden away from them,
but her legs were still marked with painful-looking sores
under the slime that had been left on her from the slugs*
upward progress. There hadn't been a word of complaint
out of her, though, and if 1 hadn't been able to clear and
ward the stream as well as our camp, she still probably
wouldn't have said anything.

"It's always worth hoping you can wash," I told her,
deciding I really ought to try getting back to my feet. "It
helps to remind you that stinking and filthy isn't the only
way of life. Let's get me horses into their pasture, and
then we can get on with it."

Su nodded and straightened slowly while I forced my-

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        119

self back to a standing position, and then we went to take
care of our mounts. If we'd earned the right to spend the
night in comfortable pavilions, our horses had also earned
me right to something special. I'd given mem a fenced-in
pasture with safe grass and their own piece of stream, a
covered-over area to sleep in if they wanted to, and a wide
trough of oats. The pasture had taken more effort than the
pavilions had, but only because I'm less familiar with
pastures. Putting up a castle would have been easier, but
horses aren't known for being partial to castles.

Once we had the saddles and bridles off our mounts, we
left them alone to enjoy themselves and went to take care
of ourselves. The others had spent some time looking into
the targe silk pavilions before leading their mounts to the
pasture, and the only one still in hers was Soffann Dra.
Good old fearless leader was taking care of her horse for
her so that she could continue inspecting to her heart's
delight, which was exactly what she was doing. None of
them had had any trouble figuring out which pavilion
belonged to whom, not when I'd matched them to the
color of the horse each rode, and the small woman seemed
as pleased with her white tent as she was with her white
mount.                      »,

My own gray pavilion stood between Su's brown and
white one and Kadrim's golden one, all segments of the
large circle the six tents were formed into. On Su's other
side was Soffann Dra in white, on Kadrim's Zail in black,
and between Zail and the small woman, Rikkan Addis in
red. If I'd been even a little less tired the red tent would
have come equipped with several special features, but
fearless leader had gotten lucky with the sort of day we'd
had. Maybe next time the luck would be on my side.

Considering the state of my clothes and boots, I walked
no farther onto the carpeting of my pavilion than was
necessary to reach the soap and drying cloth, and then I
hurried back out. Su took only a moment longer to get her
own things, but she didn't turn immediately toward the
stream with me; she hesitated very briefly, then without a
backward glance walked over to Soffan Dra's tent.

"Thought you might like to come with us to the stream
to wash," she said, looking through the open fold in the

120 SHARON GREEN

silk without taking her bedraggled condition inside.'' Lacici
made it safe for us, so we might as weH all Jump in."

*'0h, I'd love to," the small woman's voice came, and
then she was hurrying out with her drying cloth and soap
in her hands, a warmer, truer smile on her face man I'd
ever seen before. The smile, though, turned out to be for
Su; when she saw me watching her it faltered, and then it
was gone entirely. "On second thought, maybe I'll rest a
while first and go to the stream later," she said, quickly
moving those pretty green eyes back to Su while trying to
revive at least a portion of the smile. "Thanks anyway for
asking me."

"Wait," I said as she began to turn back to me tent,
speaking before 1 could stop myself. "If you fall asleep
and don't make it to the stream, you'll wake up in the
morning with clean, new clothes and nothing but a body
covered with half of what we went through today to put
into them. I think you'd better—come with us now, and
leave the resting for later."

She looked at. me in silence for a moment, her pretty
face sober, and it was almost as though she knew how
embarrassed I felt. Then a good part of the warm smile
came back, and she nodded once as her arm tightened
around the drying cloth.

"Thank ^ou," she said, turning to share the smile and
words with Su as well. "I'd be very pleased to go to the
stream with you."

With that settled we moved off between two of the
pavilions and headed for the stream, but not the section
immediately behind the silk tents. I directed my two com-
panions to the left, more toward the gate, where I'd thick-
ened the bushes into a screen that would even let us swim
a little without being seen. We all walked along in silence,
theirs probably a good deal more comfortable than mine,
and just as we reached the opening in the bushes, Soffann
Dra put her hand on my arm.

"I know you don't like me and didn't really want me
along,'' she said, looking up at me with what seemed to be
difficulty. "I wanted you to know how much I appreciate
your asking me anyway. It was a very nice thing to do."

"1 don't dislike you." I protested, feeling my cheeks

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        121

go warm, especially when I saw the faint smile Su wore
where she stood behind the smaller woman. "I just don't—
make friends with women very easily, and we haven't
really had much of a chance to get acquainted. I didn't
mean to make you feel—unwelcome."

"Well, at least I wasn't feeling as unwelcome as Rik,"
she said with more of a smile, one hand going up to pat at
her hair. "I'm more or less used to cool receptions from
women, but I don't think he is. You two really got off on
the wrong foot, didn't you?"

"If you're going to talk about 'Rik*, I withdraw my
invitation," I said, suddenly feeling more annoyed man
embarrassed. Su had changed her smile to chuckling, which
made it even worse. "If I knew for sure it was going to
rain, I would have put up only five pavilions—or given his
a leaky roof. And speaking of water, do you think we can
get a little closer to the stream? Washing from this distance
without magic won't accomplish very much."

"But I'm really curious about why you don't like him,"
she said with a laugh, turning to keep me in sight as I
walked around her, then hurrying after me through the
opening in the bushes. "You get along well enough with
Kadrim and Zail; why not Rik^"

"Kadrim is a friend, and Zail is nice," I said over my
shoulder without slowing, knowing beyond doubt that Su
was also following—and still chuckling. "Our fearless
leader Rik is neither, and now I'd like to talk about
something else.''

"Oh, this is wonderful," Soffann Dra said, diverted at
last by the large area I'd screened off. "There must be
enough room here for at least fifty people, and you made
the grass softer all the way to the stream. I don't know
how you do it, but I'm certainly glad you do. And in case
you didn't know, he hates that name."

I had stopped not far from the stream bank and was just
beginning to try stretching some of the aches and tiredness
out of my body, which probably accounted for the reason I
spoke without first stopping to think.

"Who hates what name?" I asked, reaching wide toward
the hot, late afternoon sun. "I know I'm tired, Soffann
Dra, but I'm not following you at all,"

SHARON GREEN

122

"You don't have to be that formal," she said with a
dimpled smile, sitting down to my left and raising the
bottom of her gown to reach her boot laces. "You can
both call me Dranna, the way my family did. And the
name I'm talking about is 'fearless leader*. Rik knows you
call him that, and he hates it."

"Oh, isn't that too bad," 1 said in a very sympathetic
way, feeling considerably better as I joined—Dranna—on
the grass to get rid of my own boots. "But doesn't he
realize he ought to be happy with what he has? There are a
lot worse things to call someone, which he may yet find

out."

"Wouldn't push it too far without thinking about it, if I
were you," Su put in, standing to Dranna's left and loos-
ening her hair. "You jump on a man's dignity too hard
and too often, and he just might decide to jump back."

"And then Zail and Kadrim will probably get involved,"
Dranna added while I frowned at Su, the small woman's
voice more sober than it had been. "Normally, I don't
think either one would challenge Rik, but if you get him
mad enough to come down on you, they might be forced
into it."

"That's idiotic," I said after me briefest hesitation,
addressing both of mem. "No one is stupid enough to get
into an argument with a sorceress, not even Rik. And as
far as Kadrim and Zail go, there's no reason for them to
get involved. They both know I can take care of myself, so
why would they bother?"

They both looked at me then. Su with a faint smile of
amusement, Dranna with a searching stare, and then the
small woman shook her head with a sigh.

"You really don't know, do you?" she said, green eyes
still searching my face. "I'm not all that much older than
you, but suddenly I feel ancient. Don't you know anything
about men?"

"How much is there to know about them?" I came
back, enough of the discomfort returning so that I got to
my feet to begin taking off my clothes. "They're people
just like everyone else, and some you like and some you
don't. What's so complicated about that?"

"I think I understand now why they find you so fasci-

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

123

nating," she said with another sigh, pushing her boots to
one side and rising to her feet. "I'm just glad you don't
get along with Rik. Taking another woman's leavings isn't
what I'm used to, but at this point I can't afford to be
critical. Not that I'd be critical of Rik under any circum-
stances. I happen to like him and find him very attractive,
and he even understands."

"Understands what?" I asked automatically, wondering
why she kept talking in circles and changing subjects.
"And you haven't said why you think Kadrim and Zail
would involve themselves in my argument with fearless
leader."

"Rik understands how horribly helpless I feel," she
said with another dimpled smile, glancing up at me as her
hands reached to her gown front and began opening it. "I
knew from the start that I didn't really belong on this
quest, but I had no choice about going. I'm the only one of
us who's absolutely helpless, the only one who can't do
more than shiver through an attack and pray we survive.
It's terrible not being able to fight back, but 1 don't know
how to, and haven't the courage for it in any event. Rik
understands that 1 wasn't meant for a life like this, and
he's patient rather than criticaL Something like that means
a lot to someone like me."

"Men do more, sometimes, from feeling than they do
from thinking," Su put in, some of her words muffled in
the folds of her yellow leather shirt as she pulled it off
over her head. "Lot of the time the doing is nice, like the
way Rik is with Dranna, but sometimes it's dumb, like the
way Zait and Kadrim would be if they thought Rik might
hurt you. They don't want you getting hurt, girl, and they
won't take the chance it might happen. That's why they'd
step into the argument."

"That really would be stupid," I said, growing annoyed
again under her calm stare. "What's wrong with those
two? Don't they understand I can take care of myself?"

"I don't think you'll find a man alive anywhere who's
willing to consider a woman built the way you are, as able
to take care of herself," Dranna said with an amused
laugh, tossing her gown aside as she glanced at me. "Well,
come on! Let's get to the washing."

SHARON GREEN

124

She ran forward with small, graceful steps to the edge of
the stream bank, Su following at a more leisurely pace,
both of them ignoring the tinge of red I was sure they
could see all over me. What did what I looked like have to
do with whether or not I could take care of myself? If
being Sighted and powerful depended on what you looked
like, half the wizards in the world would be too untalented
to so much as light a match—and that included Morgiana-
As small as she was, she'd never even be able to—

I cut off the internal debate with a kick at the pile of my
dirty clothes, forced to admit that if I'd said any of that
arguing aloud, I would have been wasting the breath.
Although I couldn't imagine why, 1 wasn't so dense that 1
didn't know Zail and Kadrim had been fighting over me
just before the first attack. They were behaving the way
warlock apprentices and sorcerers—and even a few male
wizards—behaved around me witch apprentice Nedra, and
I didn't know how to cope with that. It was something that
had never happened to me before, and wasn't as enjoyable
as Nedra seemed to find it. I was very glad that Zail had
found a reason to be attracted, but Kadrim, although very
handsome, was only a boy, and I didn't want them fight-
ing, especially not against fearless leader—

"Damn," I said under my breath, adding a few street
words inside my head, where I'd learned to keep them
because of Morgiana. None of it was working out right,
not the way it did in books. The quest wasn't a lark or a
fun adventure, it was a race to save a world and its people;

the most attractive man around there was too busy being
alert against attack to pay any real attention to me, and me
first assignation I'd ever had was with a boy I wanted
nothing more from than friendship—but who seemed to
want more from me. On top of that, I still hadn't figured
out a way to take over leadership of the expedition, and
that alone was enough to make me depressed. Su and
Dranna were already splashing around in the water, so I
took my jar of soap and went morosely to join them. If I
was going to mope, 1 might just as well do it clean.

The stream water was blue-green and delicious, so cool
and refreshing that I spent some time swimming in the
light current rather than immediately beginning to bathe.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

125

Because of that, Su and Dranna were already back on the
bank and drying by the time 1 got to washing. They
offered to wait until I was finished, but that would have
left mem standing in their drying cloths while I hurried to
get clean, and we were all too tired for standing or hurry-
ing. I told them I would be perfectly fine and that there
were soft lounging robes waiting for them in their pavil-
ions, and those two items of assurance and information
helped make up their minds. They carefully gathered up
their filthy clothes—keeping them well away from their
now-clean bodies—and their soap jars, and left the wash-
ing area to the one who had formed it.

I took my time with the washing, delighting, as always,
in the feeling of being really clean, and then I left the
stream to take up my drying cloth. It was getting a good
deal closer to sundown by then, and I stood all alone in the
middle of the large, bush-screened area, the very soft grass
cradling my feet, looking out over the stream toward the
far bank and the forest there, the long, thick drying cloth
held in front of me while I patted at my face with it. The
sun was just above the trees and flaming out its anger over
being forced to abandon its realm to darkness, the sullen
red painful to the eyes but forcing a soothing, quiet calm
on everything that would soon become part of the silence
of night. 1 loved the look of sundown and the view of it
from that spot was magnificent, a view of peace that that
world more than owed us. It was . . .

"That's not fair," a voice said suddenly from behind
me, unexpectedly close behind me. "The scenery in this
part of the stream is much nicer than in ours."

I whirled immediately to see Zail, standing no more
man five feet away, his drying cloth wrapped around his
middle, his smooth chest bare except for that small, golden
medallion, his arms folded easily and comfortably before
him. Strands of wet, dark hair fell on his forehead over
those pretty gray eyes, and when I realized his faintly
amused stare was resting on me rather than on the sunset,
it came to me with a shock that the entire back of me was
bare!

"Zail, you're not supposed to be here!" I blurted.
feeling my cheeks going red as fluster covered me a lot

126 SHARON GREEN

more thoroughly than the drying cloth did. "You have to
leave. . . !"

"But why?" he interrupted to ask, his faint grin amused
as he unfolded his arms and began to move slowly toward
me. "You don't think I'd hurt you, do you?"

"Well, no, of course not," I stumbled, still blushing
and horribly upset, my hands clutching the drying cloth to
my throat, my feet desperate to back away from his ad-
vance. "But I really don't. . ."

"The water has made your hair a little darker," he
observed, stopping in front of me to raise one hand to the
dripping strands. "I like it better when it's dry, pale and
soft as silk, draping your shoulders like a priceless fur.
And your eyes are the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen,
light and very deep, drawing me closer like twin, exqui-
sitely matched jewels. I could never hurt anything as
perfect as you, Laciel. You believe mat, don't you?"

He was looking down into my eyes, his body no more
than a breath away from mine, his hand still touching my
hair, and once again I found that the ability to speak had
abandoned me. Of course I knew he wasn't going to hurt
me, but my heart still hammered inside my chest, setting
all of me to trembling with the heavy thud of it, and 1
couldn't fight my way through me shivering confusion his
nearness caused. I wanted to ask him to turn his back until
I got the drying cloth wrapped completely around me, but
I just couldn't do it.

"Of course you believe me," he murmured, sending a
glow through all of me with his warm, beautiful smile.
"You know I'd never lie to someone who obviously sun-
bathes rather often with no clothes on."

His smile turned to a grin and laughter when my face
flamed to an even hotter red and 1 looked down with a
horribly embarrassed, "Oh!" but his amusement wasn't
mocking. It was a clear attempt to share something inti-
mate, and when his hand came gently to my chin, I found
out what that something was.

"Close, personal friends never have to be shy with one
another, lovely girl," he said, making me look up to see
that the warm smile was back. "And besides, you have
nothing to be embarrassed about."                     •

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        127

His head lowered toward mine then, and until it hap-
pened I didn't understand that he was going to kiss me. 1
wasn't innocent, not at all, not even if I had never been
kissed like that before; it was just that 1 hadn't expected
him to kiss me while I was soaking wet and practically
naked. With his warm, gentle lips on mine it came to me
that his arms were also around me, holding me tight to his
body, my own arms a flimsy and ignored barrier between
us. I should have been struggling to push him away,
telling him how improper that was, but all I could do was
stand there and begin to really taste the kiss he was giving
me.

"You know something?" he said very softly when he
finally let the kiss end, his strong arms still firmly around
me. "You're delicious as well as delightful, and I'm very
glad you made this place so private. It's perfect for giving
each other a very special gift, one mat can be exchanged
again and again and again, and be more precious each time
it is. We're going to give each other that gift now, aren't
we?"

He had asked me another question, but I knew without
doubt that he was going to answer it for me just the way he
had done with the other. One of his hands was on the bare
flesh of my back, moving slowly, in soft circles, and I
found that I really did want him to answer the question for
me. I felt terribly odd, and my breathing was more uneven
than it had been at any time that day, and 1 couldn't bear
the thought of his letting me go. . . .

"Sony to interrupt, but I'm afraid I have something
rattier important to discuss," a voice came suddenly, star-
tling Zail as well as me. "I would have waited, but this
has waited too long already."

"Come on, Rik, give me a break!" Zail protested,
running a hand through his still-wet hair as he looked at
the other man in exasperation. "Another hour or so won't
make that much of a difference, and I promise I'll come
straight to your tent after ..."

"Sorry, Zail," the miserable, low intruder said again,
his bronze eyes looking as though they were struggling to
keep from being amused. "The discussion I have sched-
uled isn't with you, it's with her. I'm sure you understand."

128

SHARON GREEN

Zail hesitated at that, his body stiffening slightly, his
expression going neutral but faintly guarded. He stared at
Rik in silence for a moment, then shrugged in an off-hand
way.

"Well, if it's that important, 1 suppose I can wait a little
while," he grudged, really trying to sound unconcerned.
"Go ahead and get it done."

"Zail, privately," Rikkan Addis said, his voice soft and
unexcited, his body tall and shoulders straight. He was
wrapped in a drying cloth just the way Zail was, but
somehow he gave the impression of being fully clothed
and well armed. Zail stiffened even more at the two calm
words, and suddenly 1 realized what Su and Dranna had
said was true.

"Zail, it's all right," I said quickly, reaching one hand
to his arm before remembering about the cloth I held and
bringing it hurriedly back. "I'm sure mis will only take a
minute, and then you can come back. I'll send a bird to
your pavilion."

He looked startled as he glanced at me, obviously hav-
ing forgotten that I was a sorceress, but the reminder
reassured him just the way I'd intended it to. He nodded
once, as though to something he was thinking, men turned
back to kiss me lightly -

"1*11 be waiting and listening for the flutter of wings,"
he murmured, touching one hand to my face. "Try not to
be too hard on him."

He seemed to find a lot of amusement in mat comment,
so much mat he actually nodded pleasantly to his good
friend Rik as he headed for the exit through the bushes.
Said good friend nodded back and waited until he was out
of sight and the sound of footsteps had faded, and then his
attention was all mine.

"Okay. now that we're alone I have a question," he
began, his voice and stare equally direct. "How long do
you ..."

"If you don't mind, I'd like to get just a little more
comfortable before we start this discussion," I said, find-
ing a lot less satisfaction in interrupting him than he had
undoubtedly gotten from interrupting Zail and me. "If
you'll turn your back, it will only take a moment."     .

THE PAR SIDE OF FOREVER       129

"It's hard to see how you can get more comfortable
man that," he observed dryly, for an instant looking as
though he were about to refuse, those eyes moving slowly
over me. Then he turned himself around, his back and
shoulders to me rather than his face, and I lost no time
wrapping the drying cloth firmly around me. I hadn't liked
the way he'd looked at me, and decided not to let it go by
unnoticed.

"AH right, you can turn around again," I said, ready,
now, to give him a piece of my mind. "And before we go
any further, let me tell you a thing or two ..."

"Hold it!" he snapped, raising a finger to point at me
even before he was fully turned, those bronze-colored eyes
filled with a new expression. "Since this discussion was
my idea, we'll start with what / have to say. As I was
about to ask you before, how long do you expect to keep
this up?"

"Keep what up?" I demanded with a frown, having no
idea what he was talking about. "You are the rudest, most
insolent man 1 have ever ..."

"I also happen to be the leader of this expedition," he
cut in, still angry. "That's the part you seem to be having
no trouble overlooking, and I've had enough of it. The
wizard told me to give you time to get used to the idea, but
he didn't say 1 had to put up with your nonsense until the
quest was over. Now: are you going to back off and
behave yourself, or do we have to settle this another
way?"

He had moved slowly forward toward me until he stood
no more than five feet away, the same distance Zail had
started from a few moments earlier. Despite my fluster I
hadn't really minded having Zail that close, but the feeling
wasn't the same with this man. His shoulders were too
broad, and his upper body and arms were too well-muscled,
and he was looking down at me with a directness that
made me want to bare my teeth. He was trying to take
something that was mine with words instead of ability, and
he'd never live to see the day I'd let him get away with that.

"Settling this shouldn't be hard at all," I told him,
folding my arms over the drying cloth as I looked up to
meet his gaze, "All you have to do is step down to the

130

SHARON GREEN

place you belong in, and there'll never be another harsh
word exchanged between us. I'm the proper leader of this
expedition, and there's nothing you can do to aiter that."

He stared at me in surprised silence for a moment, his
fingers on his hips near the top of his drying cloth, quite a
lot of his anger having disappeared, and then he shook his
head with what seemed like confusion.

"You sound like you didn't hear a word the wizard
said," he observed, those eyes now studying rather than
staring. "We were all given our places on this expedition,
and yours wasn't leader. I've spent the last ten years leading
men into battle from one side of my world to the other: it's
what I was born to do, what i was raised and trained to do.
What makes you think you could do it better?"

There was nothing but mildly curious questioning to his
words, nothing of anger, nothing defensive. His self-
assurance was as thick as a stone wall, presented to the
world without chink or crack, so uncaring about belief that
belief was the first thing it engendered. He thought he
knew where he. stood and thought he was weil-rooted, but
that was not going to turn me defensive.

*'I don't think I can do better, 1 know it," I came back,
raising my chin just a little. "Magic users are traditional
leaders of expeditions, because of the very fact that they
are magic users. Are you silly enough to think that having
hordes of people following you around makes you special?
Only special abilities can do that, and you don't have any.
This quest means a lot to me, and I'm not about to see it
fail because of inadequate leadership. Don't you think our
objective is a little more important than your puffed-up
pride? Wouldn't it be better to step aside now, to make
sure we don't fail, than to keep a death-grip on what
Graythor mistakenly ordered? He may be a very powerful
wizard but he's also very old, and age has a way of
making you do things you would never do in more clear-
headed moments. The best thing you can do now, for
everyone's sake, is step quietly and gracefully aside."

"I see," he murmured, folding his arms the way mine
were folded, what seemed like real amusement beginning
to show in his eyes. "You have more special talent than I
do, so you should be leader. But as I see it, your special

131

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

talents are already being put to use for the good of the
group; do you mean to say you're holding something back,
something you'll use only if everyone lets you be leader?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying!" I protested, shocked
that he'd suggest I'd do something like that. "1 told you
how important this quest is to me! Holding back would be
nothing less than sabotage against everything we're trying
to accomplish! I could never ..."

"And what about handling the natures of our compan-
ions?" he asked, giving me no chance to finish what I'd
been saying. "In what way do your special talents give
you the ability to calm Kadrim's urge to take on every
attacker single-handedly, to hold down Zail's penchant for
looking for trouble just for the sake of the lift it gives him,
to keep Su from sacrificing herself on behalf of someone
she considers a friend, or to let Dranna know she's a full,
accepted and acceptable member of this expedition? Would
you put a restraining spell on them, limiting the abilities
we so desperately need from them?"

"No, 1 wouldn't put a restraining spell on them," I
said, beginning to feel confused from everything he was
throwing at me. "And how do you know about restraining
spells? The others know almostJiothing about ..."

"Then how would you handle them?" he asked, and I
suddenly noticed that there was more—firmness—now in
his whole attitude. "What would you do if Kadrim and
Zail started a fight over you? Wall them off from one
another? When they might have to fight to save each
other's lives at any given moment? And how would you
keep Su from standing in front of you again, the way she
did at the fair, without hurting her by saying you don't
need her protection? Dranna doesn't trust other women,
not after all the times they've turned on her, and she's had
a bad experience with magic. How do you plan on putting
her at ease? How will you ..."

"Stop it!" I shouted, furious at the way he kept ham-
mering at me, refusing to let me think. "You're just trying
to confuse me! You know [ can do a better job than you're
doing, but stubbornness won't let you admit it! You're
trying to talk me out of it , . ."

"And how will you handle me?" he asked, plowing

132 SHARON GREEN

calmly on as though I hadn't said a word. "What if I call
you cute names, and insult you, and flatly refuse to ac-
knowledge your orders, just the way you've been doing
with me? How will that make you look in front of the
others?"

"You'd do that just to make me look bad?" I de-
manded, feeling my hands cur! up into fists at my sides.
"Of all the low, vile, cowardly things to. . . !"

"But that is what you've been doing with me, isn't it?'
he pursued, still held by that maddening calm. "If you can
do it, why can't I? All I'd have to do would be to
comment on the truth. I could let your nickname be 'lovely
legs' or 'cute round-bottom', for instance, and mention
that following you is a pleasure, since following is usually
done from behind. That sort of disrespect is guaranteed to
make trouble at the worst possible time; when one person
in a group does it and gets away with it, the others can't
help but wonder how far they can go. Wondering usually
leads to trying, and the next attack can find everyone
doing something different, something that could turn out to
be fatally foolish. The wizard said that under no circum-
stances were you to be leader; how would you feel if
someone died because you tried it anyway?"

"No!" I whispered, shaking my head, so horribly upset I
didn't know what to say or do. How could he say that / would
be responsible for the death of one of the others? Just
because I'd been calling him fearless leader? Just because
I'd— "You're lying! Nothing like that could happen!"

"Couldn't it?" he asked, now more steady and grim
man calm. "Five minutes ago, Zail was closer to challeng-
ing me than he would have even considered being when
this quest first began. He's not only feeling possessive
about you, he's starting to lose respect for me, and Kadrim's
not far behind him. That's your doing, and one way or
another it's going to stop now. I don't want to have to hurt
one of them just because it's been too long since the last
time somebody took the trouble to teach you about the
right and wrong ways of doing things. Sniping from be-
hind is not the way to make yourself a leader, especially
when you're not qualified for the position. From now on
you'll behave yourself, or you'll be very sorry you didn't."

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

133

"Not qualified!" I breathed in true fury as he turned
away from me, obviously ending the discussion because
he'd said all he wanted to! Everything he'd thrown at me
had had the purpose of rattling and distracting me, to push
me off balance and keep me from demanding what was
mine by right! Old fearless leader certainly did have a way
with words, but unfortunately for him some of them had
really been the wrong ones. It so happened I did know
how to challenge for me leadership of a group, and the
proper time had just presented itself.

I really had very little strength left for magical effort,
but I couldn't use magic against Rikkan Addis and didn't
even want to. What I wanted was to get a little more
personal, not to mention physical, and a single word took
care of the requirements for that. I tightened my grip about
the hard round stick I'd called into being, seeing my
opponent stop short when the second one appeared directly
in front of him in the grass at his feet, then began moving
toward him.

"In the packs, that's the weapon used during a chal-
lenge," I told his back, starting to feel again the way I had
all those long years ago. "1 got to be pretty good at it, but
don't let that frighten you. Justpick it up and turn around
and fight."

"What do you think I am?" he asked with a snort,
starting to turn back to me without even trying to reach for
the stick. "I don't fight females, and especially not with
a—Oof!"

The air whooshed out of him when I jabbed him side-
ways, hard, right in the middle, even before he was com-
pletely turned around. He bent over with the pain and
surprise of it, wrapping his arms around himself, doing no
better than I'd thought he would.

"What I think you are is a fool," I said, remembering
how good the taste of victory was. "You don't talk when
you're supposed to be fighting, and you don't simply
dismiss a challenge. Pick up the stick, fearless leader, or
I'll knock you sillier than you are naturally."

He raised his head so those bronze eyes could find me
again, his expression full of more mad than had been in it
back at the fair. I was certain he would go for the stick

SHARON GREEN

134

then. but some people are incapable of doing things right.
Something very like a growl came from his throat, and
then he was launching himself directly at me.

When I'd been leader of our pack, no one had ever
come at me without the challenge stick. I hesitated no
more than a very brief time, but that was more than long
enough for that miserable man to reach me- He threw his
arms around me and pulled me down to the ground even as
1 beat at his back with the stick, but he ignored the blows in
a way no one had ever done before. The grass was very
soft but the weight of his body wasn't, and 1 was gasping
for the breath knocked out of me even as I struggled to get
loose. I brought up the stick and fried for his head despite
being mostly pinned under him, but he ducked that dark-
haired head aside and grunted as he took the blow on his
shoulder, and then his hands were on my wrist. I cried out
as his fingers began twisting my arm, finding it hard to
believe he seemed to be using only a fraction of his
strength. None of the boys in the pack had been that much
stronger than me, not any of them, and 1 couldn't keep my
hand from opening and letting the stick slide out of my
grip. Once it had slipped to the grass he took it and threw
it away. and then those blazing bronze eyes were looking
straight down at me.

"I think you can consider this challenge as having been
answered." he said, his voice still very angry despite its
evenness, his big hands clamped to my arms to keep me
from beating at him with fists- "If you ever raise a weapon
like that to me again 1 will answer in kind, no matter what
it does to that overblown ego of yours. I'm not a child,
I'm a man, and having bested boys doesn't mean you can
do the same with me. And you should have listened when
1 told you to behave yourself; now you're going to get
what you've been begging for."

"What do you mink you're going to do to me?" I
demanded, struggling against the impossible strength in
those hands as he began to get up and pull me with him.
"Do you think I've never been beaten up before, that I'll
start sniveling and crawling once it's done? If you're smart
you'll let me go now, or next time it'll be my turn."

"You've already had all the turns you're going to get,"

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

135

he said, yanking me to my feet by the wrists as though I
weighed nothing at all. "And I'm not in the habit of
beating up women, no matter how obviously they seem to
expect it of me. What I'm going to do is take the wizard's
advice and do what he did to civilize you, when you were
fresh from the life of a gutter rat. That ought to serve the
purpose."

1 don't really know if the blood drained from my cheeks
or rushed to them at that, but 1 do know how shocked and
embarrassed I felt. Graythor had told him that, an absolute
stranger and one I hated? As he began drawing me closer I
kicked at him and fought to get loose, but I had never had
to fight against strength like this, and the kicking didn't
seem to bother him. He was going to do it, he was really
going to do it, but if he did I'd die of mortification! ! had
to stop him, even if it meant using magic, but I couldn't
use magic without activating Graythor's spelt! One of his
arms went around my waist as I fought harder and even
more wildly—and then suddenly he was standing com-
pletely still.

"What in hell is that?" he demanded in a low, disbe-
lieving voice, one that compelled me to look up. The
breath caught in my throat when 1 saw what he had, and I
felt a sudden chill in the pleasant warmth of the early
evening. We'd been interrupted at the best possible time,
but it wasn't likely to turn out to be in the best possible
way,

The thing stood in front of the bushes farthest away
from us, what would have been to the left as you entered
the area and faced the water. Some of the bushes were still
vibrating where it had pushed itself through them, under-
standable in view of the*size of the thing. Every inch of it
was a pure, sparkling white, its skin and fur both, the
space around its madly glaring yellow eyes, the rows of
long, sharp teeth showing in its snarling mouth, the needle-
pointed talons at the ends of its four feet. It had no tail to
speak of but it did have leg spurs, big yellow ones that
complimented its claws/and they moved just a little as it
flexed its talons into the grass while staring at Rikkan
Addis and me.

"It doesn't matter what it is," I answered after swal-

136              SHARON GREEN

lowing just a little, staring back at the thing. "What does
matter is where it could have come from. If it had been
here when I warded this place, it would have been pushed
out by the warding spell. How could it have gotten back
in?"

"That's an even better question," he agreed, letting go
of my wrists and beginning to slide his arm from around
my waist. "And the next one has to be—Look out!"

The thing launched itself at us with such speed that !
was frozen in place by shock, but the attack didn't affect
Rikkan Addis in quite the same way. His hand came up
and shoved me violently to the right, so hard that 1 went
stumbling and sprawling to the grass, and then he was
diving to the left, getting himself out of the way just as he
had already done with me. The white intruder raged through
the space where we'd been standing and finally stopped to
whirl about with a snarl, furious that its claws hadn't been
able to find flesh and blood, its mad yellow eyes glaring
all around. It looked at me, and then it looked to where
Rikkan Addis had rolled in the grass and up to one knee,
and then it made up its mind. With another snarl of
kill-lust, it went after the man.

My heart was hammering and my hip hurt from the way
I'd fallen, but that didn^ keep me from speaking a spelt
designed to smash the thing instantly. The gesture capping
the spell threw the beast to one side with a scream of pain,
but as far as being smashed goes, it wasn't. I'd been afraid
it was that kind of life form, the kind that needs immense
power to destroy it, and suddenly 1 felt like trembling- I
didn't have that sort of power left, and Rikksn Addis was
unarmed. We were helpless before it, and it was going to
kill us!

"I can't stop it!" I called to the man in a voice that
wasn't as steady as it should have been, starting to gel to
my feet as the white beast shook itself to throw off the
pain I'd given it. "All I can do is hold it off for a while,
but that should give you time to get the others. Hurry!"

The white beast glared malevolent hatred at me, as
though it knew that 1 was the one who had given it pain,
but it didn't come for me as I'd expected it to do when I'd
stood up. Its look of hatred had a sense of patience to it, as

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

137

though it knew it would have no trouble taking me later,
when it had the time, but just then it had a more pressing
objective. It bared its fangs in a silent snarl of vengeance
promised—and then turned again toward its first choice in
prey.

I'd expected Rikkan Addis to do as I'd said and go after
the others, but when I turned to look where the beast was
looking I saw that he hadn't moved except to stand straight.
! moaned inwardly to see him still there, not knowing how
long 1 could hold off the white beast if it kept attacking,
and then I noticed that something strange was happening.
The man's bronze eyes were glowing brighter and brighter,
so bright that the glow was beginning to spread to all of
him, and in the glow he was—changing' One instant a
man stood there and the next there was a giant bronze
beast in his place, with nothing left to show that the man
had been there except for a discarded drying cloth lying in
the grass. The bronze beast was almost as large as the
white one, and this time when the intruder attacked, there
was no attempt made to get out of its way.

The two beasts came together with a thud and the sort of
snarling growls I'd never heard before in all my life, true
challenge given and answered inlhe most basic way possi-
ble. Claws raked and fangs stashed,'the grass tore out by
the roots under their churning feet, and then they were
rolling over and over, first one on top and then the other.
Any other two beasts fighting like that would have been
shredded to ribbons instantly by the terrible violence and
ferocity, but although there were streaks and lines of red
on both white fur and bronze, neither beast seemed to
notice it. They were engaged in a fight to the death, and
wounds could be worried about by the one to survive.

I had heard about people with link-shapes, but I had
never before seen the transition and results, nor had I ever
seen one of those link-shapes engaged in that kind of a
fight. From the way it had started I'd expected the meeting
to be noisy, but aside from panting and grunting and heavy
thrashing around, the fight was nearly silent. Each was
trying to bite the throat out of the other, or claw its way
through to a vital organ, and they had no time or energy
for sound effects. The only time I had ever seen savagery

138

SHARON GREEN

like theirs had been during my time in the streets, a part of
a very small number of those who haunted the alleys and
gutters. That sort either went on to make their presence felt
by the entire city, or died by the same savagery they,
themselves, produced; but whichever way it went, no one
ever entirely forgot them.

The white beast howled suddenly and threw itself away
from the bronze, and in its hurry to back off I could see it
was limping badly. Its right foreleg was torn and bleeding,
possibly even broken, and the beast knew exactly what
that meant. Only in perfect condition did it have a hope of
besting the bronze link-beast, and it was no longer in that
kind of condition; it was now only a matter of time before
it died. With that realization blazing full in its yellow eyes,
it turned with the sort of speed it had shown at first, and
launched itself directly at me.

I can't say I wasn't expecting the attack, but expecting
something doesn't make you able to stop it. I spoke me
smashing spell a second time, but this time the capping
gesture did no more than make it scream, nothing to stop
its racing advance. The bronze beast was right behind it,
easily matching its speed, but he had been caught by
surprise when the white beast had turned from him, and
there was no way he could reach it and stop it before it got
to me. I stood in what felt like a dream as the two rushed
toward me in slow motion, the white form out ahead and
certain to stay that way. the bronze straining every muscle
in its body in useless effort, no time to throw myself aside
and out of the way. All I could do was stand there and
silently curse myself for letting my strength and power
drain so far, and then the white form leaped, triumph in its
yellow eyes. If 1 had been capable of it 1 would have
screamed as I fell backward and would have closed my
eyes—but then I would have missed the savage streak of
black hurtling in front of me.

By the time I hit the grass and was able to twist around,
there was a second fight already in progress. My heart
thundered inside my chest and every inch of me was
shaking uncontrollably, and InThig had never looked so
beautifully welcome in all my life—or so screamingly
enraged. The black demon who had been the companion

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

139

and-bane of naif my existence was almost unrecognizable
in its maddened fury, the blaze of its red eyes making the
white beast's yellow gaze seem mild and unexcited. It had
knocked the white beast down with its attack, and amid the
most blood-curdling screams it was literally tearing the
thing apart, scattering it in red and white pieces all over
the grass. The white thing was dying but it wasn't dead,
and its howls of agony were making me ill. InThig's claws
and teeth just kept ripping and tearing, forcing me to put
my hands over my ears and squeeze my eyes shut. It was
the time with the Hellfire all over again, and the memory
of that experience was too fresh to let me even begin
coping with the current one.

And then I was pulled to my feet and two strong arms
were wrapped around me, holding me tight to a broad,
bare chest in an effort to calm my shuddering. I didn't
know where he'd come from but I didn't particularly care,
as long as I could stand in his arms and share his warmth.
I had never thought of myself as a baby, even when I was
very small; I hated feeling that way, but I couldn't seem to
help it-
After what seemed like ages the howling stopped, but it
took a minute or two before the snarling and tearing did
the same. I had never seen InThig that furious, and it took
some doing before it calmed down. A big hand had been
gently stroking my still-wet hair, and finally I was able to
raise my face with a weak smile of thanks—which froze in
place when 1 saw who had been holding me.

"It almost got you, and that was my fault," Rikkan
Addis said, the look in his bronze eyes more than uncom-
fortable. '*! should never have let it back off, but I didn't
realize how stupid a move that would be. I'm sorry."

"But—I thought you were Zail!" I blurted, feeling like
a foot, feeling the heat in my face again. After the way
we'd argued, after everything I'd said and done to him—
To let him hold me like that!

"Sorry to disappoint you, but Zail doesn't happen to be
around right now," he said, letting me go as I stepped
back away from him, an odd expression in the eyes look-
ing down at me. "Or anyone else, for that matter. As soon
as we're finished here, we'd better go check on them."

140 SHARON GREEN

He turned away from me then to watch InThig claw one
last time at a motionless, white-red body, and the move-
ment finally took him far enough away so that 1 was able
to see all of him. Thin, while lines covered him here and
there on his tanned body, what was left of the wounds his
link-shape had taken, healed in the transition back to
human form, but that wasn't what made me gasp. I hadn't
realized it sooner, but he was stark naked, and then I had
my back turned even as my cheeks flamed hotter.

"What's the matter?" his voice came from behind me,
more concern in it than I had expected. "Don't try to force
yourself to look at that carcass, there's no one here to
impress. Just walk around it without looking, and we'll..."

"That's not the carcass that's bothering me," i interrupted,
annoyed at his instant assumption of superiority. "You
may not realize it, but you lost something in that fight."

"Oh, the drying cloth," he said after a moment of silent
inventory-taking, finally getting the point. "I'm not used
to worrying about clothes and such, my belt usually holds
everything inte.r-transition, waiting for me to change back.
Obviously it slipped my mind that my belt is with every-
thing else, piled in my tent. i appreciate your reminding
me about it."

He sounded so damned amused that I wanted to scream
and throw something at him, but all 1 did was stand there
staring out over the water, rewrapping my own cloth-
Clothes had been a very special status symbol for as long
as I could remember, marking the ones who had them as
winners, the ones who didn't as losers. Very often if
someone was thrown out of the pack, they were first
stripped naked before the ejection. Morgiana had very
properly agreed that being naked wasn't right, so I'd never
had to explain the point to her; now this—this—man was
daring to laugh at me for doing what was right, and I didn't
like it even a little.

"Are you all right?" a still-growly voice asked, just
before InThig came stalking around to my left to examine
me with nan-owed, burning-red eyes. "The nerve of that
life form, to believe it might harm my—ah—companion,
without fearing what / would do. Are you sure it didn't
hurt you?"

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

141

i.

"It didn't come anywhere near me," I answered, put-
ting one hand to the big, black head. "Thanks to you. The
next time I try chasing you away, feel free to hit me with
something. Now thai it's dead, the only thing left to worry
about i? where it came from- How could I have missed it
when 1 warded this area?"

"That's something I'd also like to know," Rikkan Ad-
dis put in, coming to stand to my left now that he was
decently wrapped in cloth again. "I was hoping we wouldn't
have to do it, but now it looks like we'll have to stand
watches tonight."

"Watches won't be necessary, Rik," InThig answered,
sitting on its haunches to look up at the man before lifting
a paw to lick. "That beast must have come through the
gate, just the way the insects did. I detected the insects
when they came through and followed them, but they
moved too fast. By the time I reached the pavilions our
companions had already been stung, and were lying on
their floors unconscious. There were six insects and four
had performed their duty and died. but when I searched for
the other two, I found them dead as well. They must have
been created with an extremely short life cycle."

"To keep them from turning on the beast next, and
preventing it from doing what it was sent to do," Rikkan
Addis-said, nodding in thoughtful understanding. "If the
insects got all of us, the beast would only have to finish
the job. If they didn't get all of us, the thing could have
some fun before getting on with it- But what I still don't
understand is how the insects and beast got through a gate
that we couldn't get through."

"Obviously, the gate isn't timed the same from at least
one of the worlds it leads to," I said, feeling very, very
stupid. "You can't get into it from this side, but there's
nothing to stop something or someone from coming out of
it. And I thought I was being so clever, including the gate
in the area of warding to keep us from having to leave its
safety in the morning. I should have remembered I was too
tired to be intelligent and alive, never mind clever. Now
I'll have to seal it off."

"As long as there's still a point to sealing it off, we're
ahead of the game," Rikkan Addis said, dismissing my

142 SHARON GREEN

stupidity as though it didn't matter in the least. "As far as
I'm concerned, if you hadn't knocked that thing aside when
it first came for me, I wouldn't have had time to link-
change and I would have ended up a tasty dinner snack. In
my book that means I owe you one—or two, if you care
to count the way 1 let the thing get away from me long
enough to go after you. From now on, feel free to bad-
mouth me any time you like."

He was looking down at me in the deepening darkness,
his bronze eyes glowing with that same odd expression,
taking me completely by surprise with his offer. He wasn't
joking, I could see that clearly, and suddenly i didn't want
him blaming himself for something that hadn't been his
fault.

"Considering the fact that the thing went after you
twice, there was no way you could have known it would
change its mind and target," I pointed out, looking away
from his stare to search for the deep red ball that was the
setting sun. "We'd better get over to that gate now, before
it gets completely dark. I don't think I have enough left for
sealing and lighting the way. And when it comes to start-
ing up with people, I'll choose my own points of conten-
tion, thank you. I don't need anyone volunteering points."

"Oh, yes, ma'am," he said as 1 moved past him head-
ing toward my dirty clothes, carefully skirting what was
left of the white thing, hearing the renewed amusement in
his voice. "I withdraw the suggestion with all due haste,
so just pretend I never said it. There is one thing I'd like to
ask, though . . ."

"What thing?" I said when his voice trailed off, straight-
ening up after bending to get my clothes. He had followed
along after me and stood there beside InThig, his arms
folded across his chest, the demon back to sitting on its
haunches. Bronze eyes and red eyes glowed at me out of
the deepening dark, and I had the feeling both pairs were
holding down laughter.

"It's really such a little thing," he said, his deep voice
faintly coaxing. "From now on, why don't you call me Rik?"

It was already dark by the time we got back to the
pavilions, checked on our companions and made them

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

143

comfortable for the night, then went to get something to
eat. I replaced the drying cloth with a robe before sitting
down to the meal that was still hot and tasty because of my
spell, thankful that I'd had the foresight to provide each
pavilion with its own lamp. After sealing the gate I was
just about empty, and wouldn't have been able to uncover
the food if I'd had to do it with magic.

"You really should have invited him to eat with you,
you know," InThig said from where it lay on the soft
carpeting, between the table 1 sat at and the bed I would
soon be using. "With oniy you two still awake, it would
have been the decent thing to do."

"No, it wouldn't have," i disagreed, pulling over a
plate of something and picking up a fork. "As tired as I
am. I don't even knov/ what I'm eating; lucid conversation
is completely beyond me. Besides, I had a previous date
for dinner. If I can't have that one, I'd rather eat alone."

"But Zail T'Zannis is sound asleep," InThig pointed
out, a definite purr forming the words. "Rik is wide
awake and all alone, and not ready to sleep yet. He's
rather resourceful and has quite a way with words, don't
you think?"

"Are you complimenting h^m, or getting ready to sell
him?" I asked around a mouthful of beef in creamed wine
sauce, turning my head to inspect a very comfortable
demon. "And how did you know about my dinner date
with Zail?"

"Demons tend to know about a lot of things," it an-
swered smugly and evasively, its grin exposing quite a few
sharply pointed teeth. "Rik's link-shape is really effective,
isn't it? Did you see the way it took that thing's weight in
attack without losing an inch of ground?''

"Wail a minute," I said, understanding struggling its
way through the clouds of exhaustion I was wrapped in.
"If you saw that much,, you were there even before the
attack started. Why did you wait so long before you
stepped in?"

"Rik didn't need my help, so why would I have inter-
fered?" it asked,'innocent curiosity dripping from every
word. "I really admire his link-shape, it's so swift and
powerful for someone who isn't a demon- Once this quest

SHARON GREEN

144

is over, I just may reform myself to be more like it. Did
you notice that Rik isn't afraid of me? He talks to me
almost the way you do."

"InThig, are you developing a cnish on Rik?" I asked
in real surprise, feeling the least bit wide-eyed. "I didn't
think demons were susceptible that way, but apparently I
was wrong. If you want to go over to his tent ..."

"Laciel'" it interrupted with the next thing to a snarl,
jumping up to stand shoulder deep in outrage and indigna-
tion. "1 do not have a crush on Rik! Don't you understand
what I was trying to say?"

"InThig, I'm asleep on my feet," I answered with all
the confusion I was feeling, putting the fork down after no
more than a taste or two of the beef. "If you have some-
thing to tell me, why not say it straight out?"

"I don't think this is the time," it decided with a sniff,
letting its fur settle back down from the straight-up posi-
tion to which it had risen. "You do present a problem, my
girl, but I'll find some way out of it."

"Good hunting," 1 mumbled, forcing myself out of the
chair so that I might stumble over to the bed. "And when
you're ready to stop talking in riddles, do let me know."

I took the robe off and slid into bed, and if InThig said
anything after that, ! missed it entirely.

CHAPTER 5

It was just a little past dawn when we gathered at the gate,
our horses saddled and ready, our bodies full of breakfast,
our minds clear and alert after a good. long night's sleep.
My rest had been interrupted once, by a nightmare about
Hellfire which had turned into the nightmare I'd had for
years and could never remember, but InThig had been
there as always to tell me that everything was all right, and
I'd gone immediately back to sleep. I felt strong and alive
that morning, back in full power; and determined to do
something to make sure I stayed that way for as long as
possible.

"I still can't believe it," Zail was saying as I led my
gray to where everyone stood, his voice half upset and half
annoyed. "Four of us knocked out by insect bites, leaving
only two of us to face a thing that was supposed to destroy
us all. I can't believe I just slept through all that."

"/ believe it," Rik answered, straightening the bridle on
his mount. "I can still feel its teeth sinking into my
shoulder, and the pure hatred that just about blazed out of
it. And there were three of us who were left to face it. If
not for InThig, it would have gotten Laciel before I could
reach it."

"Which brings to mind a point I was too tired to see
yesterday," 1 put in as Zail turned to me in concern,
drawing everyone's eyes. "That thing came after me only
when it knew it had lost to Rik, not first thing when it

I AS

146                 SHARON GREEN                               ,,;'

began its attack. That means I'm no longer the only target
around here, so we'd all better stay alert to see whose turn

comes next."

"That's not necessarily true,'" InThig said into the gen-
eral mutter of surprise, this time drawing all the attention-
"The thing was supposed to kill all of you, so perhaps it
wasn't given any specifics about who to attack first, and
simply chose the one who seemed more dangerous. That
doesn't mean you aren't still the primary target, Laciel."

"Stop helping," ! told it flatly, not much pleased with
that particular point of view. "If it turns out I'm right
while everyone concerns themselves only with me, this         •
expedition could quickly become one with a lot fewer
members- If we each watch out for ourselves, we won't be
taking any chances."

"Except with your life," Rik put in, speaking over his        ';;

shoulder as he adjusted his saddle girth. "I think Zail and        If
Kadrim can watch out for you and themselves, both at the        ;'(
same time. We all have to put up with inconveniences for        ^
the sake of the quest, don't you think?"                         €

What 1 thought was that he was beginning to sound an        ]i
awful lot like a demon 1 knew, but when he put it that way        ^.
1 couldn't very well argue. Zail and Kadrim seemed to be   ,     4
absolutely delighted with the decision, Su was approving,
and Dranna was amused; InThig said nothing, but I had        ?
the feeling it was also on Rik's side. I was trapped and       ';?
outnumbered, and I could see that that was one of the        t
times when arguing would have been a waste of breath.          ],

"Yes, ! guess we do all have to put up with inconve-        ;;.
niences." I agreed after a moment, aware of the amuse-        "
ment good old Rik was trying to keep hidden. "Thank you        -
for pointing that out to me, 0 fearless leader."                  :^

Zail turned away to clear his throat, Kadrim felt the         ,;

need to rub at his face with one big hand, Su shook her
head with a smile on her face and a twinkle in her eyes,        '^
Dranna looked pained, and InThig simply turned and pad-        ^
ded silently away. The object of my comment had finished        ^
messing with his saddle, and so was free to lean on it with         :;

one arm while turning to look at me from under lowered        ;'•'
brows, his free hand a fist on his swordbelt. I gave him a         :^.
bright, friendly smile in return, one designed to tell him         '!.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

147

that he now knew exactly how I felt about being overpro-
tected, but he missed out on the chahce to comment. The
gate chose that moment to come to life, which meant it
was time to go.

I made sure everyone remembered that they had to hurry
before forming the chain with Su and Kadrim, then braced
myself tight against the pull while they all made the transi-
tion. This time I didn't need to be helped out of the gate,
and Kadrim hadn't had to worry about being attacked
before it was his turn to go through. I had left our campsite
intact, warding and all, which meant it stayed in existence
until I, myself, went completely through the gate. The
spell would have to be renewed on the way back, but at
least it had served our purposes for as long as we needed
it.

The world we emerged in was cooler than the one we'd
left, and although we were again in the middle of woods,
it was somehow possible to feel that we weren't the only
non-vegetable life around there. The sky above the trees
was cloudy but not threatening, and not too far away we
could see a road that wasn't too badly out of repair.
Despite the lack of sun we all felt better, something Zail
was the first to put into words,,

"Now, this is more like it," he enthused as he looked
around, getting a good deal of satisfaction out of the
presence of the road. "Whatever comes at us will be
standing upright with a sword in its fist, and going off into
the bushes for a private minute won't be a major adventure.
We might even get to stay at an inn tonight."

"Not in those clothes, you won't," InThig commented,
rejoining us in time to hear Zail's last words. "And proba-
bly not in any clothes. There are soldiers only a short way
down the road, and they seem to be watching for something."

"Damn," Rik said softly, looking in the direction InThig
had come back from. "They have to be waiting for us.
Any other explanation would.be a coincidence too hard to
swallow. Can we get around them without their seeing
us?"

"The detour would be rather extreme." the demon an-
swered, obviously having already considered the idea-
"They're spread out in the woods as well as clustered

148             SHARON GREEN

around the road, and if we did get by them, we would then
have to pick up the trail again, which probably leads
through the large town this road goes to. If you can't stay
on the road. you won't have an easy time of it."

"Easy doesn't enter into it," the man muttered, rubbing
at his face with one hand while continuing to consider the
direction we had to go in. "If Su doesn't follow the
unbroken trail, how will we know we're following the real
thing? Laying down a false trail at a point like this would
be just the trick to send us off in the wrong direction. We
can't afford to leave the road for any length of time."

"And an attempt to face such numbers head on would
be futile," InThig said, closing the circle Rik had opened.
"What we need is another way."

"InThig," I mused, "why do I have the feeling you
know this world? Better than ten minutes' worth of scout-
ing would provide, 1 mean."

"Possibly because I once visited it," the demon said,
looking at me with unblinking red eyes. "I came through
this very gate, as a matter of fact, but from a world which
wasn't the one we just left. There were no soldiers posted
on the road at the time, biri there was a band of brigands I
just happened across. You should have seen their expres-
sions when I ..."

"Then you know enough about mis world to give me
some background information," 1 said, interrupting what
would probably have turned out to be a very long story.
"Do you think you can describe the important parts in
enough detail to let me copy it?"

"I'm certain I can," it answered, trying, demonlike, to
decide between being put out over having been inter-
rupted, and curious over what would happen next. "You're
going to disguise the group as natives?''

"Can you think of anything else we can do?" I asked in
turn, privately wondering how successful secondhand magic
would be. "They're watching for strangers, not for a
group of natives."

"I think that's probably the best chance we have,"
Rikkan Addis said, his attention obviously having shifted
from the distance to our conversation. "Is there anything
the rest of us can do?"

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

149

"The rest of you get to do the hard part," I said,
gesturing InThig along with me to some grass at the side
of the gate. None of them asked what I meant, as my
meaning was obvious: all the others could do was wait.

More than two hours went by while InThig talked and I
listened, both of us trying to form a picture in my mind's
eye. I had to See something before I could reproduce it,
and most of the Sighted 1 knew would not have even
considered attempting a spell for something they hadn't
Seen. As the time went by I got a fairly good idea of what
that world's society was like, but not in the sort of detail 1
needed to work with. Not long after we started Zail drifted
over to sit with us, and although he made no attempt to
touch me and certainly didn't interrupt, his presence was
hardly the help I needed. I just kept getting more and more
frustrated, until suddenly InThig said something that gave
me an idea.

"... and their buildings are all one-story," it was
going on, only the claws flexing into the grass showing its
own frustration. "Those buildings remind me of the ones
on Cymar, in that small town they think of as a giant
metropolis. They use coaches to travel in on Cymar as
well, but not as class status symbols the way they do here.
Only aristocrats are permitted to (ravel by coach among
these people, and ..."

"Wait, wait, that might be it," I said, sitting straighter
out of the slump I'd fallen into. "InThig, if I were to
reproduce, say, one of the coaches from Cymar, which I
have Seen, would you be able to be specific about how h
needed to be changed for this world? That's taking the
long way around the mountain, but it's still better than
working blind."

"I should certainly be able to do that," InThig decided
with a blink of its eyes, rising to a sitting position. "At
any rate, it can do no harm to try."

It might also do nothing but drain my strength, I thought,
but it was still a better idea than the only alternative I'd
been able to think of. Making us and the horses invisible
would likely have gotten us past the waiting soldiers, but
those who aren't used to being invisible usually have a lot
of trouble with it at first. Not being able to see the feet

150              SHARON GREEN

you're walking with is more of a problem than those who
have never tried it consider it, and that goes triple when
horses are involved. Accidentally touching someone you're
passing, with an arm you can't see and have therefore
forgotten the length of, losing track of the people you're
with, which produces the thought that you're deserted and
alone, getting it through your head that just because you're
invisible does not mean you can step on a twig and not
make noise— No, trying to play match-up would be a
good deal easier, not to mention less nerve-racking.

It took something over an hour to do the coach and our
clothing, as well as deciding who was supposed to be what
sort of native. There were six of us, three male and three
female, and for all we knew the composition of our party
and our descriptions had been given to the soldiers who
were watching for us. If they'd been posted around the
gate they would have had us as soon as we stepped
through—if our sudden, unexplained appearance hadn't
sent them running and screaming in all directions first.
Someone hadn't been sure they wouldn't react that way so
they'd been set on the road we had to follow, giving us the
room to come through unmolested, but not the room to go
anywhere. By the time we were ready, I was really getting
to dislike our enemy on a personal basis.

"I think that just about does it," Rikkan Addis said
when my last spell changed all the horses to brown. Four
of them were hitched unhappily to the coach, saddle mounts
in traces they were completely unused to, while the last
two were left under saddles for our "escort." Two was
rather a small number as far as escorts went on that world,
but it was either leave it like that or "create" more riders
and horses. If it hadn't taken so much effort to get that far
I would have created them, but we weren't ready to leave
that world yet and I had to save as much as I could for
emergencies. The gear from our four coach horses was on
top of the coach disguised as luggage, dark leather trunks
which went well with the gold and green-trimmed coach.

"There's still one thing left, but at least I'm not the one
who has to do it." I said, pointing at InThig. "It's time to
play demon-in-the-basket."

"Really, Laciet, 1 see no need for this," InThig pro-

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151

tested for the umpteenth time, enjoying the way the rest of
us looked but unwilling to share the discomfort. "I'd be
much more effective if I ranged ahead, scouting out what
was before us, giving early warning of peril or ambush,
seeing where you others can't . . ."

"And not being with us if we get asked a question about
this world that we ought to know," I finished for it, also
for the umpteenth time. "You're the only one of us who
knows the necessary details, so you have to be with us.
And if we're going to talk about preferences, I'd rather be
up on the coach seat with Su than in this stupid dress, so if
you insist on doing it your own way, I'll do the same.
There's no reason why you should be the only . . ."

"And I would find it far more pleasant were I to ride
beside Rik rather than be the driver of this conveyance."
Kadrim put in, gesturing at the coach with his own unhap-
pjness. "Then. should we be attacked, I would find it
possible to . . ."

"And I would rather be riding in the coach with Laciel
and Dranna," Zail took his turn, grinning at the small
woman and myself. "We three could share one of the
seats, with me in the middle, of course . . ."

"Okay, that's enough out of^all of you,*' Rik broke in.
his tone even and sure, calming despite the words he used.
"Zail, you'll be riding with me as one of the guards,
Kadrim, you'll be driving, Laciel, you're one of the ladies
in the coach, and InThig, you're going in the basket. Has
everybody got that?"

He looked around at us as we looked back at him, and
even without a bronze-eyed stare we were able to remem-
ber that our places hadn't been chosen at random. With
four horses needed to pull the coach, four of us had to ride
on or in the thing, and those four were placed there by
necessity. Su had to be up on the driver's seat in order to
show the way, and the best one to sit beside her, to make
her size less conspicuous, was Kadrim. The other two
inside the coach had to be Dranna and me, a lady who
was, as custom on that world demanded, traveling with a
maid. That left the escort roles to Zail and Rik, who might
have been a noble and his servant, except for the fact that
Dranna and I would then have had to be the escort, which

SHARON GREEN

152

wasn't the way things worked around there. To make
things even more confusing for the ones watching, I had
disguised Rik, Su and myself so that we no longer looked
precisely like ourselves. Su was pretending to be male and
was therefore also able to wear her sword; Rik had dull
black eyes that made him look slow and not quite bright;

and I had brown hair and eyes that were a good fit for the
maid role I was playing. Su and the men wore trousers,
boots and shirts of gold, with wide-brimmed hats of gold
trimmed with green, just like the coach. I, as the maid,
wore a green-trimmed, long-skirted dress of goid, but
Dranna—Dranna was absolutely magnificent in all green
trimmed with traces of gold. She was the high lady, the
one the rest of us served, and she had laughed in delight
when it was first decided, and after that simply glowed
with pleasure. She had been assuming that I would be the
one to pretend to be the lady and she the maid, but
somehow I'd found I couldn't do that to her.

With InThig's idol laying it on the line, the demon had
no other choice than to sigh and agree. I could have found
enough reason to make a fuss of my own, but I'd been
responsible for most of the decisions about everyone's
places, and it would have been mindless to jump on fear-
less leader for standing behind my own decisions—even if
I felt like doing exactly that. 1 still wasn't very happy with
the idea of him as leader and was still looking for a way to
change it, but that was neither the time nor the place to do
it.

InThig looked at the dainty pink and white straw basket
I'd made with a demon in mind, looked at me with less
friendliness than it usually did, then sighed again before
beginning to dissolve. What had been solid black flesh and
fur quickly turned to thick black smoke, and then the
smoke began flowing into the basket, fitting in neatly until
it titled the wide basket completely. Two blazing red eyes
looked up out of the black cloud, and they weren't pleased.

"It's narrow, cramped, and hard despite the silk lin-
ing," InThig announced, sounding terribly put-upon and
suffering. "I hope you're pleased with yourself, Laciel."

"I hope you don't mind if/'m pleased, InThig," Dranna
said before 1 could answer, looking down at the demon-

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

153

vapor. *'I really do feet much safer having you in the
coach with us, and I'm very grateful to you for agreeing to
do something that's so obviously beneath you. You really
are a magnificent—life form."

"Why, not at all, Dranna, the pleasure is mine," InThig
purred in its sleekest manner, the black cloud roiling in a
very satisfied way. "If my presence is comforting to you,
I'm more than happy to oblige. If you'll close the lid now,
we can be on our way."

Dranna leaned over with a devastating smile and closed
the lid of the basket, but slowly enough to keep eye
contact with InThig for as long as possible. Once it was
done Kadrim took the basket to put it in the coach, but
Dranna ignored his grin and the ones on Zail and Rik as
she turned to me.

"He just needed to feel appreciated." she confided in a
low voice, looking up at me with eyes that still matched
the new green of her gown. "It can't really be comfortable
for him in such a small basket, and it didn't hurt anything
telling him that."

"No, it didn't hurt anything," I agreed, changing my
mind about pointing out again that InThig was an it, not a
he. Considering the way it had responded to Dranna I was
no longer quite as sure as 1 had been, and it didn't seem to
make much difference. If InThig was happier being treated
as a he, who was 1 to deny him? It? Whatever.

Once Kadrim put InThig's basket in the coach, he and
Su began climbing up to the coach seat while Rik and Zail
helped Dranna and me inside. Rik smiled at Dranna and
patted her hand as he helped her in, and got a warm smile
in return; Zail took my hand and kissed it while looking at
me with those beautiful gray eyes, and the silent promise
in them moved me into the coach without my knowing
exactly how I'd gotten there. The promise had spoken
about the dme together we'd missed out on the night
before, and had said we wouldn't miss it again. I suddenly
couldn't wait until we camped for the night, even if the
camp was one that had to be warded.

"He's nice, isn't he?" Dranna said, bringing me back
to the world to find that we'd already begun moving. 1 was

154

SHARON GREEN

sitting on the seat that faced the back of the coach, of
course, and she was smiling at me from the other.

"He's very nice," I agreed with a matching smile,
moving my right foot away from the basket thai had been
put on the floor of the coach. "I wish he really could have
ridden in here with us."

"Oh, you mean Zail," she said, glancing out one of the
curtained windows. "I was talking about Rik. He must be
one of the nicest men I've ever met, and one of the most
interesting, too. Did he really fight against a—thing—last
night and win?"

"He has a very powerful link-shape," I said with a nod,
stil! partially involved with thoughts about Zail- "It's bronze,
like his eyes, but all over, and seems to have a lot of
experience fighting. And winning. That thing knew it was
beaten as soon as he bit into its leg and really damaged
it."

"What do you mean, link-shape?" she asked, a strange
expression having taken over for the smile. "1 don't un-
derstand. I thought he just—fought it."

"With nothing but a drying cloth for a weapon?" I said,
wondering what dinner with Zail would be like. "Even a
sword would have left him at a disadvantage with thai
thing. Having a link-shape means you can shift from one
form to the other whenever you like, human or animal,
take your choice. It's an ability some people are born with,
but that doesn't mean they're Sighted; having an ability is
not the same as doing magic. He also has a belt with a
spell on it, that takes care of his clothes and things while
he's in link-shape, then puts them back on him when he
shifts again. He didn't have it with him last night, though,
and didn't realize he'd lost the drying cloth in the first
shift. I was the one who discovered that when it was all
over, and it was very embarrassing."

I had expected Dranna to be amused over my being
embarrassed by something she was probably very used to,
and was grateful when all she did was stare out of the
window without even a smile. Seeing a man without clothes
was nothing like seeing a boy the same way, and it really
was embarrassing. And then my mind began wondering
what it would feel like to see Zail that way, wearing even

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

155

tf

less than he had when he'd kissed me.- My cheeks were
uncomfortably warm at the thought, but I couldn't push it
away; somehow I didn't think he'd mind if I saw him like
that, but would simply grin at my blush. I remembered the
way he'd grinned at me the night before, just before he'd
put his arms around me, and then 1 was deep in the
memory of it.

1 hardiy noticed that the bouncing of the coach didn't
ease much even once we were on the road, but I did notice
when we abruptly began slowing. The soldiers guarding
the road hadn't been far away at all, and even as we
slowed, men in uniforms of yellow with brown trim began
closing in on the coach.

"The one in the brown uniform with yellow trim is in
charge," InThig whispered from its basket, a tiny wisp of
black vapor peeking out through a narrow slot in the
basket weave. "He's a lord, and that's the way they
address him."

"You there, whose coach is this?" an arrogant voice
demanded, sounding reasonably near. "The House colors
are totally unfamiliar to me."

"The lady is in charge, sir," Zail's voice came jn
answer, sounding stolid and not-very interested. "With all
due respect, you'll have to speak to her."

"A lady?" the voice demanded, this time outraged.
"With no more of an escort than you four? I'll JUSI see
about that'"

The coach door to my left was yanked open and a man
who was probably the owner of the voice poked his head
in, but his belligerence disappeared as soon as he saw
Dranna. She was giving him one of those smiles of hers,
her expression coot and in control, and the newcomer
proved that lord or not, he was first and foremost a man.

"My lady, I do beg your pardon." he apologized imme-
diately, reaching quickly for the brown-tnmmed-with-yeliow
hat he wore. "I had no idea— I mean, I was taken quite by
surprise— I mean, may I ask who you are?"

"I'm afraid you may not, my lord," Dranna answered,
her low, throaty voice making the man's hand close more
tightly on the hat he held. "I travel in utmost secrecy on
very urgent business, which I may not divulge to anyone.

156             SHARON GREEN

That, of course, is the reason my escort is so small, so as
not to attract undue attention. I'm sure you understand."

"The High Magus—" the man began, paling just a little
before he caught himself, and then he exchanged nervous-
ness for a smile. "Someone not to be mentioned. Of
course I understand, certainly I do, but you must be ex-
hausted from so long a journey. I insist you stop here for a
while, and accept a sip of wine to restore your strength."

"That's quite generous of you, my lord, but I'm afraid
I'm very much pressed for time," Dranna said, showing
nothing of the upset that / could feel. "Perhaps on the
return journey, when I have more leisure. . . ?"

"My lady, would you leave me devastated?" he asked,
suddenly full of smooth, easy words. "1 have been com-
manded to search every vehicle and person appearing on
this road, thoroughly and at great length, which would
then mean the repacking of all of your gowns and lovely
possessions, a time-consuming task. Instead, let me exam-
ine you with words of praise over a glass of wine, and you
will be much more quickly on your way. I beg you not to
deny me a gentleman's effort in place of a soldier's."

1 couldn't keep from tensing when he spoke about search-
ing our luggage, because there was nothing in our baggage
to search. The pretend-trunks were just masks for our
saddle gear, and if anyone touched them they'd know that
immediately. If a search started I'd have to spend the
effort to change that, also working tQ make sure no one
noticed the shift from pretend to real, and somehow Dranna
understood what that would entail without my having to
say a word. She smiled a secret sort of smile to mask the
glance she gave me, then put out a graceful hand to the
man stil] looking up at her.

*1! find it difficult understanding how a woman may
deny you anything, my lord," she said in a throaty purr
that caused the man to grow two feet taller on the spot.
"Would you be so kind as to help me down?"

"With the greatest delight, dear lady," he oozed, taking
her hand. The next minute she was gone from the coach,
and I liked that even less than the thought of a search.

"InThig, should I do something to stop that?" I asked

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

'57

in a whisper, suddenly worried about what would happen
to her. "What if he asks her questions she can't answer?"

"I seriously doubt he'll be asking her anything she can't
answer." a matching whisper came back, for some reason
more amused than worried. "She's a very resourceful
young woman, you know."

Again resourceful. I sat back against the velvet coach
seat, seeing through the window that Zail and Rik had
dismounted and were just standing there, watching as the
brown-clad man led Dranna to a large, brown, guarded
tent set back in the woods. I didn't like the way the man
was looking at Dranna, but she didn't seem to mind and
didn't seem frightened at all- 1 wondered what they were
going to be talking about over their wine. then quickly
abandoned that line of thought. It led me immediately
back to memories of Zail and dinner, and that was no time
to be daydreaming.

It turned out that I would have had plenty of time for
daydreaming, as it was more than an hour before Dranna
came back, and 'nothing happened during that period ex-
cept for the casual way the soldiers watched us. The man
in brown escorted her back to the coach, raised her hand to
his lips before helping her into her seat, then closed the
door and stepped back with a wave to his men. Whatever
had stopped us earlier no longer seemed to be in our way,
and we continued'up the road with no further interference.

"Are you all right?" I asked as soon as we were
moving again, seeing the faint flush to her cheeks and the
way her hand patted at her black hair. "He didn't hurt
you, did he?"

"No, I'm fine," she answered with something of a
smile, a very pleased sort of smile. "He's a lovely man,
really, and very much a gentleman. I've always been
partial to true gentlemen. He even asked me to slop again
on my way back."

"1 can't believe we got away that easily," I said, relief
flooding my mind. "1 kept trying to think of a way to
explain a basketful of demon, and couldn't. How did you
manage to keep a conversation going for an hour without
getting caught as a stranger?"

158             SHARON GREEN

She looked at me oddly, then, as though surprised at
something I'd said, and then she laughed gently and softly.

"I can't seem to get used to the sort of person you are,"
she said, shaking her head just a little. "In some ways
you're hard and determined and fully in touch with life,
but in others you're as beautifully innocent as a very small
child. It's as though someone took certain knowledge away
from you, but 1 can't understand why anyone would do
that even if it were possible. Do you understand any part
of what I'm trying to say?"

"No," I answered honestly, wondering what she could
possibly think I was missing. "And 1 also don't under-
stand why people keep telling me I'm innocent. I'm not,
you know."

"Of course you're not." she said with a much gentler
smile, somehow making me feel very small and young.
"And it should all be taken care of soon anyway, with Zail
as eager as he seems to be. I suppose it's a good thing Rik
hasn't pursued his own interest, considering what he is.
Zail will be much better for you, and you like him just as
much as he likes you, don't you?"

"Yes, I think I do," i said, then was relieved to see her
attention drift back to the lightly curtained window. I
hadn't followed much of what she'd said, but I did know
I'd never be able to talk about Zail without sounding like a
backward adolescent, and i didn't want to talk about Rik.
She really did seem to like old fearless leader, and I didn't
want to upset her by saying something about him that she
wouldn't care for. I didn't know what she'd meant by,
"considering what he is," but that couldn't be very impor-
tant. She'd been going on about how nice he was before
I'd bored her with my explanation about link-shapes, so
she couldn't possibly see him the way I did. He wasn't as
useless as I'd first thought he was, and in a way he
reminded me of InThig, but I certainly didn't consider him
"nice," and probably never would.

Our trip continued without interruption, and in a little
while we reached the city InThig had mentioned. When we
found a busy inn on the far side of the city we stopped at
it, and I used the excuse of going in and looking around
for my "mistress" to make sure the place wasn't too

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

'59

crowded, to get a good view of the coins they used for
money. Armed with the assurances of the innkeeper that
the "lady" would certainly not be jostled, I went back to
the coach, produced a decent number of their large gold
coins, and then we were ready to go inside and order.

Dranna got to carry the money, of course, but we
discovered she also had to order for the rest of us—from
the part of the inn reserved for gentlefolk. Zail and Rik
went with her, but only to stand behind her chair white she
made herself comfortable at a private table. Kadrim and
his "assistant driver" Su stayed with me in the public
room where we were allowed some space at a long, roughly
made table and bench, and they had to hurry their meal in
order to relieve the first pair of guards so that they could
get something of their own to eat. The food was filling but
not very tasty, and I was too much aware of the pink and
white basket on the floor at my feet to feel at all comfort-
able in that place; when the meal was over and we went
back to the coach, the only one who seemed sorry to go
was Dranna.

The road took us out of the city again—which wasn't as
big as most cities on my own world, or even as advanced—
and we settled into a peaceful^time of dull travel. Dranna
and I dozed while InThig did whatever it is demons do in
place of dozing and sleeping, and it was late afternoon
before the coach slowed to a stop. Those of us inside sat
up and looked out the windows, even InThig raising a bit
of black cloud through the top of the opened basket, but
there was nothing to see. We had stopped on the road in
the middle of nowhere, the ground rising in gentle hills to
either side of us, the continuing overcast making it seem
later than it was. Dranna and I looked at each other,
wondering why we had stopped, and then Zail walked over
leading his horse and Rik's, to let us know what was
happening.

"Su says the trail leaves the road here and goes off to
the right," he told us, gesturing to the far side of the
coach. "Rik thinks that means the next gate isn't too far,
but he wants to do a little scouting before we go on.
We've had very little trouble on this world, and that's
making him suspicious."

i6o

SHARON GREEN

"I think he needs to leam to be grateful for small
favors," I said, hoping fearless leader's suspicions were
wrong. "It's possible the enemy expected that first group
of soldiers to find and stop us."

"He's not depending on that, and I think I'm on his
side," Zail said, showing his usual sobriety when he
disagreed with me about something. "There's no sense in
taking chances when we don't have to, but 1 wish he'd
have let me do the scouting. It would have been better than
standing around here and waiting."

"Well, it shouldn't be for too long," Dranna soothed
him, adding a smile. "You can't hide much in country like
this, so if there's anything ahead of us, he ought to be able
to find it quickly."

Zail and I agreed with that thought, and it turned out to
be true. Kadrim and Sue had come down off the coach seat
and Dranna and 1 had climbed out to join them, when Rik
came around the back of the coach.

"We have a problem," he announced as soon as he
appeared, not very pleased with what he had found. "There's
another force camped not far from here, and I'm willing to
bet they're sitting right on top of the gate. We didn't come
into this world in their laps, but that's where we'll have to
be if we want to leave it again."

"It's too bad the enemy wasn't as worried about them
seeing us leave as he was over them seeing us arrive," I
said, annoyance, frustration and impatience beginning to
grow in me again. "How are we supposed to get around

them?"

"Can't you use magic?" Rik asked, left hand resting on
his sword hilt, his expression matching the way I felt.
"Even if all of us had swords and could use them, we'd
still be outnumbered about fifteen or twenty to one."

"That all depends on what you'd consider appropriate,"
I answered, looking up into eyes that were still a dull
black. "1 can wipe them all out with almost no effort at
all, but I happen to think doing that would make us little
better than the enemy. Or I can freeze them all in place
and we can just walk right through mem to the gate, but
putting spells on people isn't me same as—creating a
camp, say. In order for ait of you to cross over into the

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        l6l

next world, 1 have to stand anchored in the gate. Only a
small part of me will be left in this world to maintain the
spelt, and those farthest away from the gate will probably
be able to break out of it. If those few come forward in a
rush, bent on stopping us, Kadrim and possibly you and
Dranna and Zail might not make it through except in
slices."

"Killing them is out," he said, very flatly and very
finally. "It can't possibly be their own idea that we have
to be stopped, and that means we'd be slaughtering inno-
cent dupes. It looks like that freezing spell will have to do
it, but that also means a change in our order of march
through me gate. Zai) will have to go through first and
very fast in case Su needs help on the other end and
Dranna will go right behind him, those two taking all the
horses. Kadrim will go next, without horses in case he has
to help fight on this side before it's his turn, and that will
leave only InThig and me. I'll anchor you on this end as
long as necessary, and then InThig and I will . . ."

"Perhaps such an arrangement will be unnecessary,"
Kadrim said suddenly, his expression more than simply
thoughtful, one big hand to his smooth-cheeked face. "There
are times when one fights gladly and with pleasure—and
times when such frivolity proves uncalled for. We have
not the time, I think, for dallying gaily in battle."

"What's your plan?" Rikkan Addis asked at once, more
willing to listen to the boy than I'd thought he'd be. "As
long as it doesn't leave you here fighting on your own. 1
want to hear it."

"No, 1 shall be no more involved than you," Kadrim
answered with a grin of deep amusement, then moved his
eyes to me. "It must be Laciel who performs the chore,
with the assistance of InThig. Should she find my sugges-
tion feasible."

"That means your idea concerns magic," I said, return-
ing his look with interest. "What would I have to do?"

"The details would be yours to determine, girl," he
replied, "yet has it occurred to me that those of this world
are familiar with magic and in awe of it, likely even more
frightened than awed. For what other reason would our
enemy have put them where they would fail to observe our

162 SHARON GREEN

arrival? Should they be shown a sorceress and a demon,
perhaps appearing without warning in their midst, frighten-
ing and threatening, will they find it possible to stand their
ground against them?"

"They'll probably run like rabbits'" I said with a laugh
of delight, loving the idea as soon as i heard it. "The rest
of you will have to be careful not to get trampled in the
rush.'*

"But what if they don't run?" Rikkan Addis asked with
a frown, the only wet blanket in a group of laughter and
agreement. "What if they attack instead? Fear sometimes
drives a man forward instead of back, and that would leave
Laciel directly in their path. It's too much of a risk."

"Don't be ridiculous," I told his worry with all the
exasperation suddenly filling me, disliking the sort of
hemmed-in feeling his smothering produced. "Can't you
understand that no one can approach a sorceress unless she
wants them to? These are ordinary people; what could they
possibly do to counter me?"

The took in his eye was unvocalized frustration, but
there was no way to argue with me and he knew it. The
job was mine, mine and InThig's, and trying to deny it
would just put everyone else in danger for nothing.

With that point settled, there was nothing left to do but
get ready. After getting InThig's basket out of the coach
and unhitching the horses, I got rid of the vehicle and put
everything back as it had been, including the way we
looked. The four coach horses were resaddled while 1 told
my friendly black vapor what we were going to do, got its
amused agreement, then turned to the others.

"We'll have to get as close as possible to them," I
announced, for the most part thinking out loud. "We want
you to be able to see them but not them you, so I'll put up
a fence like the one I did at the fair, only this time you'll
all be behind it with the horses, and you'll be able to see
out. As soon as the coast is clear, you'll dissolve the fence
and come up to the gate—which I'll be standing right in
front of."

"How are we supposed to dissolve the fence?" fearless
leader asked, still rather unhappy with the way things were

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        163

going. "A magic fence needs magic to get rid of it, and
you're the only one of us capable of that sort of magic."

"You'll say the word, 'drahzheet'," I told him, trying
very hard to be patient with his silly questions. "The spell
will be keyed to cancel when that word is spoken, and it
won't matter if the one saying it is Sighted or not. It's also
a word that isn't very likely to be spoken accidentally at
the wrong time, so you won't become prematurely visible.
Does anyone else have any questions that will waste some
more time?"

They shuffled a little and glanced at one another, but as
far as questions went there weren't any. Despite his having
told me I could say anything I liked to him, good old Rik
seemed to be having his original trouble with my attitude
toward him—and also seemed somewhat surprised that it
was unchanged. Why he should expect any differences I
couldn't imagine, not after all the nasty things he'd said to
me. Having nearly gotten killed with him didn't change
anything, a fact he was beginning to understand; he'd have
to be satisfied with InThig liking him for both of us.

With nothing left to keep us near the road, we followed
Rik to the closest place we could get to the soldiers
without their seeing us, and after moving about ten feet
away from the others, I spoke the spell that erected the
fence. As soon as everyone was safely invisible, 1 looked
at the opposition again to see that there were nearly a
hundred of them, hard-looking men who seemed alert
against something they didn't understand. There was a tall,
spear-like pole thrust into the ground with a blue and tan
pennon flying from it, the colors matched in the uniforms
the men wore, and most of them were clustered around the
pole, guarding it as though it were treasure. In point of
fact it was the gate they were guarding, a gate they couldn't
see but didn't have to, thanks to the pole. It was thrust into
the ground directly in front of the gate, marking the impor-
tant spot and making sure they didn't lose track of where
they were supposed to be and drift off-center.

1 thought about the situation for a minute or two, InThig's
eyes on me while 1 tried to decide exactly how to play it,
then made up my mind. When 1 spoke the invisibility spell
the demon was unsurprised, as we'd both known we'd

164

SHARON GREEN

need invisibility to get into the middle of them without
being seen, and then I took my basket and began to move
around the outer edges of the men. They were all facing
outward, watching in the direction they'd been told we'd
be approaching from, and some of them looked cold, as
though they'd been standing in one place too long. Consid-
ering the coolness of the air I felt sorry for them, but I also
knew they wouldn't be cold for very much longer.

It only took about ten minutes to skirt their spread-out
formation and come at them from behind, so to speak,
from the direction opposite the road, the direction in which
only a few of them were watching- The gate was behind
these few, between them and the bulk of their force, and
moving past them to reach the pole was much easier than
trying it from what was the front- The men were standing
much too close together there, and I didn't want them to
know I was around until the proper time.

The proper time came when 1 stopped beside the pole
and gestured the invisibility away, but I wasn't noticed
immediately. All of the men were facing outward and
away, including the one not far from me in blue with tan
trim, which made it necessary for me to clear my throat a
couple of times. The man dressed as the group's leader
finally turned in annoyance, clearly ready to blast whoever
had been making that distracting noise, then froze with
eyes suddenly widened when 1 smiled at him.

"Good afternoon," I said in a low, throaty imitation of
Dranna's voice, letting my smile show the long, sharp
fangs I'd given myself. "Would you like to see what I've
brought you?"

I held out the closed basket on my left arm, waiting
politely for an answer to my question, but ail I got was a
lot more faces turning in my direction. The faces were
strangely pale with very round eyes, and the bodies be-
neath them had begun trembling very slightly.

"It was the nicest present I could think of," I assured
them, looking around at the growing numbers facing me.
"I know you'll love it when you see it; they always do."

1 reached across to the basket with my right hand,
pretending I didn't see the horrified head-shaking that had
begun, still smiling for the benefit of those men who had

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        165

edged around from behind me, and the ones who were
farthest away and just noticing that something was happen-
ing. There were still some at my back, I knew, and when I
felt the mud against the shield I'd erected, knew also that
at least one of them was a very brave man. But brave men
were something we couldn't afford to have around there,
not if we were to get through the gate.

"That won't do you any good, you know," I said over
my shoulder, smiling pleasantly at the man with the sword
in his hand, the one who had tried to run me through from
behind, the one who was trembling and backing away.
"Once 1 come to deliver my present, there's nothing you
can do to refuse it."

I returned my attention to the others to find that they,
too, were backing away, their panic-stricken gazes shifting
between my face and the basket lid ! was already begin-
ning to raise, most of them making gestures in the air
that were probably warding signs against evil. The untal-
ented had a habit of doing that, seeing and repeating one
small part of a spell, thinking that the gesture would do
them some good. Even if they'd been Sighted it probably
wouldn't have helped, especially since most of them were
doing the gesture with their own, individual variations.
When doing magic you have to be precise, otherwise you
can end up a toadstool or a clothesline.

InThig didn't budge until the lid was raised all the way,
and then it took its turn at theatrics. I was pretending to be
fey, pleasantly deranged and utterly horrible to anyone
who looked at me, the sort of being who scatters flower
petals on your body after slaughtering you in the most
ghastly fashion possible, but InThig didn't care to horrify
by suggestion. Demons will either do nothing to frighten at
all—or go completely the other way.

"Living blood!" it suddenly breathed, flowing out of
the basket in a rising black cloud, two madly glaring red
eyes looking all around. "It's been so long! I must have it,
all of it, to slake this endless thirst! Let me take it now!"

There were actually screams here and there as the cloud
of demon began spreading out in all directions, but there
were also two or three spears launched with the same
terrified impetus. InThig, of course, made no effort to

l66

SHARON GREEN

avoid them, and they passed through its vapor body even
more easily than they would have through its solid form.
That was when it began laughing, a maniacal sound filled
with blood-chilling anticipation, and that was it as far as
those men were concerned. Officers and men alike turned
and began running, following the example of the dozen or
so horses that had hysterically pulled loose from their
tethers to stampede at the first sight of the thick black
cloud. Arms and legs pumped madly as they ran, mewling
and whimpering coming from more than a few, and in less
time than it takes to tell it, they were gone from sight- I
looked around carefully, glad, now, that the open hills and
low grass provided nothing in the way of cover, and when
I turned back my companions were hurrying toward me.

"Laciel, that was beautiful," Zail laughed as he came
up, his grin matched by most of the others. "I've never
seen a better set of teeth, and InThig was so convincing we
were almost afraid to come closer. They'll probably keep
running until they drop ''

"Were you hurt at all?" fearless leader demanded as he
brought both our horses forward, his eyes narrowed to
match the frown he was wearing. "Someone came at-you
from behind with a sword, and those spears thrown at
InThig-ended up closer to you than i liked. Did any of that
reach you?"

"No, none of it reached me," I answered, finding it
impossible to keep the annoyance out of my voice as I
gestured to get rid of the fangs I'd decorated myself with.
"What do you think i am, an absent-minded apprentice?
Or an infant just starting to toddle around?"

"1 already know what you are," he said, those bronze
eyes glittering at me, something odd turning his tone dry.
"Playing guessing games would be the sort of waste of
time you claim to dislike. Let's get through the gate before
those men come back with reinforcements capable of doing
magic."

He stepped past me to wrestle the pole out of the ground
before I could think of something to say in return, and then
there turned out to be too little time. It really wouldn't
have been bright at all to wait until those soldiers came
back, and suddenly everyone was being very efficient in

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        (67

seeing to it that we got going before that happened. Su was
there in front of the gate, reaching for my left hand while
Kadrim did the same with my right, InThig was solidifying
back into cat shape, and the rest each had two horses in
tow. The gate was already open, having activated when I'd
first approached it while invisible, which left only me not
doing the necessary. Right then I would have much pre-
ferred getting into a heated argument with Rikkan Addis,
but instead moved silently—and furiously—into the gate.

We made the group transfer to the next world quickly
and without incident, and when Kadrim and I stepped
through I found that that world was closer to sundown than
the one we'd just left had been. It was also hotter and
emptier, with not a single sign of roads or civilization, but
at least it wasn't choked with forests. There was a lot of
tall grass all around us, and a lot of stands of woods
visible in all direction, but nothing like the thick forest
we'd fought our way through two worlds back. I would
have been happier if we could have mounted up and ridden
off, but everyone was looking at the setting sun and likely
thinking the same as I: we'd be able to cover very little
ground before we were stopped by full dark, and the
horses hadn't had as easy a time of it as we'd had. The
smartest thing to do would be to make camp, and get an
early start once the sun came up.

This time calling the camp into being was easy, since all
I had to do was speak spells already devised, with one
minor variation—leaving the gate out of the warded area.
Our tents appeared along with the fenced-in pasture, all of
it looking as it had when we'd left it that morning, causing
everyone to relax with the feeling of being home. We
didn't know what that world held in wait for us, but we'd
be able to face it more easily after a quiet evening and a
good night's sleep.

Or, at least that's the way everyone else seemed to feel.
The strength I'd had to expend in the gate had cooled a
part of my anger and creating the camp had helped a bit
more, but when i turned to take my horse and see to him, I
found Rikkan Addis already moving toward the pasture
gate, stiH leading both his horse and mine. The man had
clearly decided to help out the poor, defenseless little girl,

168

SHARON GREEN

JUS! the way he had with Dranna the day before, and that
brought back everything I'd felt before stepping into the
gate. With Kadnm taking the horses Dranna had, Rik was
free to help me•—without pausing even once to ask whether
or not I wanted that help. I was so furious, a!l I could do
was turn around and stalk away to my tent; if 1 hadn't, i
might have done something that wasn't in the best interests
of the quest.

InThig had disappeared somewhere as soon as all of us
had exited through the gate, which left my tent pleasantly
empty and quiet. The lamp burning inside it gave it a cozy
feel despite the warmth of the air, but I wasn't particularly
in the mood for cozy. 1 strode over to the graywood
sideboard and poured myself a glass of wine, took a
satisfying swallow, then let the wine keep me company as
1 began pacing around the pavilion, trying to work off my
anger. If i didn't I'd never sleep that night, not to mention
rest or eat.

I couldn't have gone back and forth more than a few
times before the flap of silk covering the front of my
pavilion was moved aside, drawing my attention. For an
instant 1 had the ridiculous idea that it was good old Rik,
stopping by for a thank-you from me for seeing to my
horse, but I suppose even he was brighter than that. The
one coming in was Kadnm, and when he saw me looking
at him he smiled.

"Should that expression upon you be meant for me, I
will depart again at once," he said, nevertheless showing
no real intention of going back where he'd come from.
"Should it be some other person or thing which disturbs
you, perhaps you would care to discuss the matter."

"If you'd like the truth, I'd much prefer flattening the
matter,'* I answered, sipping again at my wine. "How
would you like it if I came along and did something for
you that you were going to do yourself, without even ask-
ing first? You're a king; how would you tike having
people treat you as if you were crippled or incompetent?"

"Who could possibly have done such a thing?" he
asked with a puzzled shake of his head, at the same time
moving nearer. "You are a woman of great strength and
talent; who would dare to insult you so?"

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

"Who else?" I threw back at him, looking up into those
strange blue eyes. "Didn't you see the way he just walked
away with my horse? As if I'd asked him to do it? As if I
wasn't bright enough to do it myself?"

"Rik," he said, dawning comprehension adding itself to
his expression—right next to the confusion. "You must
forgive me, girt, for I fail to see what insult might have
been intended by his actions. Had 1 held the reins of your
mount, I would likely have done the same. For a man to
do otherwise would then be true insult, not to speak of
decidedly unfitting."

"But don't you understand?" I nearly shouted, waving
around the glass of wine. "What he said to me just before
we went through the gate wasn't nearly as bad as what he
said last night, and when you insult someone like that and
then do something for them, it means only one thing! It
means you think you can challenge them and win!"

"Laciel, do you speak of the customs among those you
told me of?" he asked, suddenly filled with less confu-
sion. "They were the—packs—were they not, the ones
you led till the lady Morgiana came upon you? Is this what
you refer to?'*

"Well, of course it is," I answered, responding, in spite
of myself, to his continued calm and quiet. "What else
would I be talking about?"

"I find it beyond me to know," he said, folding his
arms with a faint touch of sadness in those eyes. "Also it
would please me to know in what manner our current
situation might be likened to your time among those who
arc homeless- And for what reason would Rik act so as to
give you deliberate insult and challenge? What would be
gained by such a challenge? What would be gained by
giving insult^ It is he who is acknowledged leader of our
expedition; for what reason would he give challenge to one
who was not?"

The questions had been quietly and calmly put, an air of
wanting to help evident in them, but I still had to turn
away in very great upset. Now that the point had been
brought up I didn't know what any of that had to do with
the packs, and couldn't even think of anything when I
tried. All 1 did know was that I associated Rikkan Addis

t70 SHARON GREEN

with my former life, and couldn't keep from being re-
minded of it any time 1 thought about him. Or tangled with
him. There was something about him, something I'd felt
almost from the first time I'd seen him—but I just couldn't
remember what it was.

"I don't know what he'd get out of any of that," I
conceded atjast, walking to the sideboard to return my
glass to it. "He even refused to answer a challenge last
night, at least in the way I wanted it answered. If he hadn't
faced that beast thing without hesitation, I might have
thought he was a coward."

"You—gave him challenge last darkness?" the boy
asked, looking less sad and more startled as I turned back
to him. "He faced you and remains unharmed? How could
that be?"

"That's what I'd like to know," I grumbled, going to
the gray, fur-covered settle and sitting. "I made sticks for
both of us to use, proper challenge sticks in every respect,
but he refused to pick his up even when I hit him with
mine. All he did was dive at me and knock me down, then
take away my stick. I suppose 1 shouldn't have tried
fighting with him when 1 was that drained and tired. For a
minute it felt as though he had three times my strength."

Kadrim just stood where he had been and stared at me,
his smooth-cheeked face running through the oddest gamut
of emotions, all of them ranging between upset and laugh-
ter. 1 couldn't imagine what was doing that to him, but
before I could ask he settled on partially buried amuse-
ment, took his swordbelt off and put it on a table, then
came over to sit beside me.

"Laciel, girl, you must not do such a thing a second
time," he said, sounding for ail the world like a patiently
amused but faintly disapproving old man. "Had I thought
upon it I would have seen that you would choose to face a
challenge without magic, yet must you not do so again,
most especially not with Rik. He is a full grown man with
strength and vigor, and you no more than a girl. He clearly
has no wish to do you harm, yet might an accident occur,
should you persist in provoking him."

"But of course I'm going to persist in provoking him,"
1 said with a snort, kicking my short gold boots off before

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

I?I

bringing my feet up to the settle and folding them to the
left, away from Kadrim. "If I keep at him he'll have to
answer my challenge, and with my choice of weapons, or
he'll lose the respect of everyone on the expedition. He
gave me that idea himself, and next time he'll be in for a
surprise. I've fixed it so that I'll never be that tired and
drained again no matter what we go through, and that will
take care of the question of strength."

"How are you able to believe that your strength will
ever be a match to his?" he demanded, those hard blue
eyes beginning to look annoyed. "You are slender, and a
girl, and he a man nearly a full head larger than you!"

"I was always stronger and a better fighter than the
boys in the pack, even if they were a little taller than me,
which most weren't," I explained, smiling at how in-
censed he was. "They didn't care for the idea either, but
that didn't keep it from happening. I'm also stronger than
the men I know, and more powerful than all of them
except for the wizards. Don't worry about me, Kadrim, I
know what I'm doing."

"That simply cannot be so," he said, still annoyed, his
sharp shifting on the very comfortable settle more than
showing it. "It seems as though you have been sheltered
too far since your time in the streets, yet I know not for
what reason such a thing would be done. Do you believe
your strength would also find it possible to best mine?"

"Now don't start taking this personally," 1 tried to
soothe him, only then remembering how touchy boys were
when they decided it was time to be called men. "You and
I are friends, and the one thing friends don't do together is
see who's better. When you're older you'll understand
what I'm talking about."

"Clearly, the time has now arrived to speak of what I
wished to speak of," he said, putting aside most of his
annoyance as he half turned to face me, those blue eyes
having grown somewhat stem. "I had meant to inform you
first that never had I found interest in a woman who was
not of an age with me, yet does it seem that the doings of
the wizard have altered even this preference. As / have
become, so have my interests followed."

"Are you saying that you now like older women?" I

SHARON GREEN

172

asked, feeling somewhat uncomfortable—not to mention
ridiculous. Being an "older woman" at twenty-two just
didn't seem right. "If you are, then I really think you
ought to know ..."

"Allow me to finish," he interrupted, still with mat odd
look of sternness, one big hand held up before him. "As I
said 1 had meant to say no more than that, yet does it now
seem that I also feel with the weight of my years. Each of
my daughters has attained a greater age than you, and now
do I speak to you as I would speak to them."

"Your daughters," I echoed, looking at his smooth,
young face, the cheeks that seemed never to have been
shaved, the broad shoulders that had the straightness and
arrogance of extreme youth. "You have daughters older
than me, so you're going to speak to me like a father."

"To doubt my sanity is also to doubt the power of the
great wizard," he told me with a very amused grin, obvi-
ously enjoying my reaction to what he'd said. "When the
wizard intervened I was in the midst of taking my own
life, for it had grown to be a burden 1 could no longer
endure. I was old, you see, and although still a king. no
longer the warrior I had been. To give my pledge to strive
upon this quest in return for my youth was a thing 1 did
gladly, though I knew not then how great an amount of
that youth would be restored. I am not a boy but a man,
Laciel, and look upon you with the eyes of a man. I am
far, far older than you, and previously would have merely
enjoyed the sight of you, yet now . . . You are a flower of
youth given to me with the return of my own."

He was so serious, and those blue eyes were so direct
and disconcerting, that looking down from them didn't
help at all. So that was why Graythor had treated him as
though he was much older, why he was usually able to
stay so calm and unruffled. The doubts and uncertainties
of youth were a long way behind him, and he felt he had a
right to look at me the way he was doing. . . .

"And so you see, though I seem to lack a proper
seasoning, I am not truly without it," he went on very
gently, putting one hand under my chin to raise my face to
him again. "I will speak of my deeper feelings a bit later.
yet now must we conclude the discussion earlier begun.

THE PAR SIDE OF FOREVER

173

You must not pit yourself against Rik, for without magic
you shall not find it possible to equal him. He is a man and
you are not."

"What makes you think being a man is so special?" I
asked, taking my face out of his hand with a part of the
annoyance 1 was feeling again. "I'm sure from your point
of view it's the most important thing there is, but most of
the men / know don't stand a chance against me. What
makes you think Rikkan Addis is any different."

"I feel it safe to assume that 1 have known far more
men than you," he said, the gentleness fading as he again
found annoyance of his own. "Also am I surely far more
familiar with women, and rarely does one find a woman
with greater strength than a man. Of those tike you, large
women with more strength than most, victories would
come over men who have pursued objectives other than
those of a warrior. Too often, men expand their minds at
the expense of their bodies. Our leader is not one such as
that."

"Your leader, maybe," I said in a mutter, putting my
feet down flat on the floor and folding my arms as 1 looked
away from him. "The rest of you may be afraid of him,
but I'm not."               ^

"There is a vast difference between respect and fear," I
was told, the tone of voice working its way back to calm
and cool. "You dislike the man, therefore do you underes-
timate him; often is it difficult for us to see those we
dislike as superior to us. Your feelings are far from unnat-
ural, girl, yet are they also far from wise In serious battle,
to underestimate your enemy is to likely give him your
life. Would you have me prove the truth of my words?"

"You think you can prove an opinion?" 1 asked, not as
forcefully as I would have a moment earlier. Graythor had
also said something about underestimating the enemy, an
attitude I already knew was stupid; was 1 seeing it as
stupid only when someone else applied it to me, and not
when 1 indulged in it myself? Could 1 really be missing
that important a point?

"Some opinions are easily proven," he said, a shadow
of amusement creeping back in his voice. "You must
know I am well aware of what strength I possess, for that

174

SHARON GREEN

strength has ever been considerable—yet would I ponder
the matter carefully before setting myself in opposition to
Rik. With weapons I am certainly his superior, yet bare-
handed? Perhaps, and yet perhaps not. In any event you, a
slender girl, are certainly not, an—opinion—of mine which
may be disproven only should your strength best mine.
Would you care to make the attempt?"

I turned my head to see the way he was looking at me,
with confidence and laughter clear in his eyes, and sud-
denly that no longer seemed such a bad idea. He wasn't,
after all, a young boy whose emerging masculine ego had
to be protected, and when 1 beat him he would probably
change his mind over the way he felt about me. It was
almost impossible thinking of him as an old man rather
than a very young one, but whichever he was I preferred
having him as a friend rather than as an unwanted
complication.

"If you want to fight, I'm willing," I said with a shrug,
trying to make it clear that I wasn't angry or insulted or
anything. "if,I happen to hurt you, just tell me and I'll
stop. Now, how do you want it? Linked with a silk scarf in
the middle of the tent? Both hands free and anything goes?
Clearing the furniture won't take more than a minute, and
then ..."

"No, no, wait," he said, this time raising both hands in
protest. "You are familiar with scarf battle? Where each
participant holds to the scarf with his left hand, and the
one first made to loose his hold is considered bested? I had
not thought you would know such a thing."

"We used a linen rag instead of a silk scarf, but we still
called it silk-scarf battle," 1 answered with another shrug-
"1 suppose most people do no matter what they use. Is that
the way you want to fight?"

"I—ah—think not," he said. shaking his head slowly
and trying to took very solemn. "It has been many years
since 1 last engaged in scarf battle, and I—ah—would not
care to—urn—put myself at such risk. Perhaps you would
consent to no battle at all, merely a contest of strength
against strength. Such a contest was what I had in mind,
you see, rather than even mock battle."

"But that's awfully limited, isn't it?" I said with a

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

175

frown, understanding why he didn't want to get hurt, but
still having trouble picturing his suggestion. "Arm wres-
tling is more a matter of balance and body-use than
strength, so it isn't likely to prove anything. How else
would we do it?"

"Like so," he answered, reaching over and lifting me
into his lap even before I could unfold my arms. "As you
say, arm-wrestling would not suffice, therefore must we
find another method. This, I think, will most easily settle
the matter."

"This" was his hands closing around my wrists, his
right arm circling my back so that he could reach, my left
arm up against his chest. Somehow my wrists looked
swallowed up in his hands, and I didn't understand what
was happening.

"You now have only to escape me," he told my confu-
sion, looking down into my eyes. "Force me, with strength,
to release my hold on you, and I wili admit my error
concerning your ability to face Rik. You told me, did you
not, that he refused to allow the use of weapons? This,
then, is the manner in which you will likely need to face
him, should you prove yourself able. You may proceed
with making the attempt."    ..

"This is stupid." 1 muttered, looking back at my wrists
and moving them in his grip—or, at least, trying to. He
wasn't holding me tight enough for it to hurt, but there
also wasn't any slack in his grip. I reached for his left
wrist with my right hand, thinking to hold it still while
freeing myself from the hand, but I couldn't make his right
arm move. It was ridiculous—not to mention upsetting—
but I couldn't seem to do anything at all!

"To a certain age, boy children and girl children are
much the same in strength," I was casually told, the words
seeming to have taken no notice at all of my efforts.
"When once that age has passed, however, boy children
have a far greater advantage, for their bodies are made to
develop far greater strength. Time and again I saw this
among my own children, just as I learned the thing person-
ally when I was their age. How is it you have grown to the
size you arc, and have not learned the same?"

I didn't know what he was talking about, but suddenly I

176              SHARON GREEN

was more angry than upset. Nothing like that had ever
happened to me before, which meant it could be some sort
of trick. He couldn't be that much stronger; if he were,
then Rik would be the same! In desperation I really began
struggling then, putting everything I had behind it includ-
ing body weight, but it made very little difference. All I
accomplished was squirming around on his lap, barely
moving his arms any distance at all, ending up winded
while he watched me as though it were someone else 1 was
struggling with. After what seemed like a horribly long
time 1 was able to brace my left arm against his chest and
get some small amount of purchase—which immediately
made him change his tactics. Before I knew what was
happening his arms were wrapped around me while his
hands still held my wrists—which meant I was wrapped up
like a beldame in winter.

"You do indeed have greater strength than other fe-
males," he said with a laugh for the way I squawked in
protest, holding me up against him. "Nearly were you
able to free one of your wrists, an effort I had not antici-
pated. Now, however, freeing yourself is beyond you, is it
not?"

"Not if I use magic to clout you over the head," I
panted, glaring at him as I tried to get even a little un-
wrapped. "This is unfair and you know it! The least you
can do is go back to the way we were."

"Ah, but you will not use magic," he said with a wide
grin, making no effort to do as I'd said. "This was to be a
contest of strength rather than power, and so it will re-
main. And yet, should you wish to return to your former
position, there is a manner in which you may see it done."

"How?" I asked, suddenly very suspicious of al! the
enjoyment he was getting out of that comment. "By figur-
ing out the trick you're using on me? If I could do that, I'd
not only be back to where I was, I'd be free."

"No more do 1 use upon you than strength," he said
with that very irritating grin, looking as though he ex-
pected me to believe him. "For your own sake must you
leam this, therefore shall I not stint in my duty. Should
you wish to be released, you must first allow me a taste of
your Ups."

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

177

I stared at him openmoulhed, refusing to believe he was
serious, and that brought out the chuckling in him. I could
feel the red staining my cheeks at me thought that he might
actually be expecting me to buy myself loose by doing
something like that, and his amusement softened just a
little.

"Truly do you remind me of the woman of my heart,"
he said, tightening his arms around me very slightly.
"She, too, was filled with pride and innocence when first I
came upon her, two things which greatly endeared her to
me. The earliest taste of her lips was unparalleled plea-
sure, a pleasure I mean to know again. Should we remain
in this position for all of the darkness, we will neither of
us be fit to ride at first light. With that in view, perhaps
you would be wise to allow me my price without delay."

"Your price," I echoed, aware that the flush in my
cheeks was now being caused more by anger than embar-
rassment. The witch apprentice Nedra didn't seem to mind
buying something rather than earning it, but I'd never
liked doing things that way. I stared silently at his satis-
fied, expectant face for a moment,, seeing that he thought 1
had no choice, then began struggling again with all my
strength.                   ^

The unexpectedness of the thing and the way I turned in
toward him, actually got my right wrist loose from his
hold. That tel me do a good deal more in the way of
fighting back, but instead of becoming upset, Kadrim
laughed in delight. He immediately tried to recapture my
wrist, but my struggling and fighting didn't let him do it. I
grabbed a fistful of his long, thick red hair and tried to
force his head back, beginning to enjoy the scuffle in spite
of my initial anger, and then—

"What in hell do you think you're doing?" a furious
voice rang out, stopping everything in mid-motion. Kadrim
released me immediately, which meant I was able to turn
and see Zail where he stood, just inside my tent entrance.
The dark-haired man was nearly livid, and his blazing eyes
were riveted on Kadrim.

"Zail, you don't understand," I began, hastily getting
to my feet with a horrible sinking feeling inside, silently

178 SHARON GREEN

cursing the fact that he'd had to show up just at that time.
"It isn't what you ..."

"Just because men attack women like that where you
come from, doesn't mean you can get away with it here,"
Zail went on furiously to Kadrim, ignoring everything I'd
said and was trying to say, moving slowly forward. "You
need to learn a lesson, boy, and I'm just the man to leach
it to you."

"You mean to teach me the proper manner in which
one attacks women?" Kadrim asked in a very smooth
way, rising to his feet behind me, making no attempt to tell
Zail the truth about what we'd been doing. "Should that
proper manner involve speaking head-turning words de-
signed to beguile one who is bereft of all knowledge of
men, you may save yourself the effort. A true man will
speak openly of his desires, not attempt to see them satis-
fied through opportunistic manipulation."

"Zaii, please!" 1 tried, realizing with awful suddenness
mat Kadrim was also moving forward toward Zail. "Kadrim,
don't. . . !"

"A true man will know the difference between a price-
less work of art and a cheap, expendable bauble," Zail
growled, his gray eyes on Kadrim's face, his voice having
turned cold. "Manhandling the priceless just ruins it for all
time, a fact only those with proper breeding seem to know.
The rest find roses of mud to slobber over, which is no
more than what they deserve. I warned you once before,
boy, and now I'm all out of warnings."

"Just as I am out of patience with being addressed as
something I am not," Kadrim growled back, a!l of his
attention on Zail and none for me where I stood in upset
frustration between them. "A woman is more than a thing
whose possession alone is coveted by a man. To find one
who touches his soul as well as his heart may take a
lifetime, to find two the same who do so is to be blessed
like few others. No other thing than truth may be spoken
to one such as that, the truth of a man with a woman, not
sickening-sweet lies of . . ,"

"Lies?" Zail snarled, his hands turned to fists to either
side of him, the fury blazing up again. "Would a man
speak lies to the woman he means to make his wife?

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

179

When you find the most perfect thing you've ever seen
you don't let it go again, and you don't do anything to hurt
it—or let anyone else hurt it! It's time we settled this
between us, before ..."

"Before the quest is over?" another voice interrupted, a
calm and even but very commanding voice. "Or have you
decided to forget about the quest?"

Zail turned quickly at that, stepping to the left so that
Rikkan Addis became as easy for me to see as he'd been to
hear. He, like Zail, still wore his sword, but the arms
folded across his chest said he had no immediate intention
of using it. InThig, by his side, sat on its haunches and
looked interested.

"The quest has nothing to do with this, Rik," Zail
protested with what seemed like annoyance, returning the
bronze-eyed stare that was being divided between him and
Kadrim. "The boy and I have a private matter to settle,
which won't affect the quest one way or the other."

"Even if one of you is hurt or killed?" Rikkan Addis
asked, still looking between them. "Zail, Kadrim isn't the
young boy you think he is, and Kadrim, Zail isn't the
conscienceless despoiler you think he is. Neither one of
you is seeing things very cleariy, which I can understand
but don't care to accept. You seem to have forgotten about
all those people who will die a really horrible death if we
fail, but I can't forget about them. Do you remember how
happy and alive they were at the fair, how the men looked
at their wives and children? Those men won't find it
possible to do anything at all to save their families, they'll
just have to stand helplessly by and watch them go through
the tortures of Hellfire before a grisly death takes them—
which is more likely to happen if one of you isn't in shape
to do what has to be done. Is that what you want? Are
your differences so pressing that they have to be settled
now, when there's more to be lost than gained? If you win
your own private desires but lose the life of a world, will it
be worth it?"

Zail and Kadrim were suddenly very silent, their expres-
sions showing they knew what happened with things you
give up everything to possess. One day you wake up to

i8o

SHARON GREEN

realize exactly what's been lost, and the one thing you're
left with never means the same to you again.

"I think you two had better go back to your tents now,"
Rikkan Addis said, his voice still calm and quiet. "I'll
walk over there with you."

Zail nodded and headed for the tent flap behind Rik,
Kadrim pausing only long enough to retrieve his swordbelt
before doing the same. Fearless leader waited until they'd
both gone out ahead of him, looked at me with very little
friendliness and said, "I'll be back in a minute," then
took his own turn at exiting. I didn't much care for his
entire attitude, but I turned back to the settle and folded
onto it with something much more important bothering
me- I hadn't noticed it sooner, but something very strange
was going on.

1 lay down on the cushions with my hands to my eyes,
feeling the decent amount of strength still left to me,
almost wishing I were too tired to see what was so obvious
when waves of exhaustion weren't fogging my thinking.
So Zail wanted, to marry me, did he. and Kadrim had
something of the same in mind? After knowing me for all
of two days? So completely sure of their love that they
would fight one another to see who the lucky man would
be? Everyone kept insisting on how innocent I was, but
even if they were right that still wouldn't mean ! was also
blind and illiterate. Instant love happened in books, not in
any part of the worlds I'd ever seen, and certainly not to
someone like me with two men. If I hadn't been so flus-
tered, I would surely have seen the point much sooner.

I took my fingers from my eyes and stared up at the
gray tent ceiling, feeling horribly disappointed even though
I'd unconsciously been expecting Zail to come to his
senses at any time and have second thoughts about what
he'd been doing. It had taken Rikkan Addis' comments
about the quest to make me think, and the thoughts that
had come were inescapable: Zail and Kadrim were under a
spell, one that was probably reinforced every time we
stepped out of a gate. The enemy knew quite a lot about
us, it seemed, and knew exactly what would happen if two
of the male members of our expedition decided they couldn't
live without one of the female ones. That was why I was

THE PAR SIDE OF FOREVER        l8l

"lovely" to Kadrim and "priceless" to Zail; they were
meant to fight over me and hurt each other doing it, and in
the process ruin our chances of succeeding in the quest.
They weren't paying all that attention to me because they
wanted to but because they had no choice, and it was all
due to whoever our enemy was. I'd thought I'd hated him
before; now 1 was learning the real meaning of the word
"hatred."

Staring up at a ceiling or roof is at times compelling,
especially when there are certain truths you're trying to
keep from thinking about. I was lost in bitter folds of gray,
knowing nothing about what amount of time had passed,
when I heard someone entering my pavilion. I had no idea
who it was, and wouldn't have cared even if it was another
beast coming for me in attack; my mood had activated
some of my automatic defenses, and anything that attacked
me would be very, very sorry it had.

"Well, at least that's taken care of," a not-very-happy
voice said, reminding me that Rikkan Addis had said he
would be back. "I didn't like having to use that much
Persuasion on them, but it was either that or let them fight
it out, with each other or with me. Using Persuasion on
men is too much like making them slaves, and I don't like
having to do it."

1 lay on my back on the settle, still staring up at the tent
roof, refraining from pointing out that he was repeating
himself. Persuasion had to be the talent he had that Graythor
had mentioned to me, the talent of making others believe
what he believed or what he wanted them to believe.
Being a sorceress meant nothing like that couid affect me,
but 1 almost wished it could; then I could have asked him
to tell me I wasn't the biggest fool in all the worlds there
were.

"They've born given me their word that they won't let
themselves fight over you until mis is all over," fearless
leader went on, pretending I wasn't ignoring him. "What
happens with you three after that is none of my business,
but until then ! don't want to find either one of them in this
tent again. Do you understand me?"

"I think it's safe to assume 1 speak a good many more
languages than you do," 1 said without moving my eyes,

l82 SHARON GREEN

feeling not the least urge to look at him. "With that in
view, you may rest assured your subtle hints have come
through with full comprehension. If that was all you wanted,
you can . . ."

"That was not all 1 wanted," he interrupted with his
usua! charm, a definite growl beginning in his voice- "1
came here in the first place to repeat a point I thought I
made clear enough yesterday. Since I now know 1 was
wrong, we'll just have to go over it again, this time a little
more thoroughly."

1 didn't know what he was talking about, but I was
also too distracted to care. Al! 1 wanted him to do was get
to his point and leave.

"Didn't you see the way Zail first began talking to
me?" he demanded when it was clear i had nothing to say,
exasperation wrapping itself around him. "He was an-
noyed that I'd dared to interrupt the argument, and Kadnm
wasn't looking much more patient. If I hadn't been able to
use Persuasion on them, I probably would have had to
fight them both. You can't keep treating me like some
uninteresting, unintelligent burden without having it affect
the discipline among the rest of the group, just the way it
already has. You and J arc going to have a nice long talk
about this, long enough to make you see reason. Now, sit
up and look at me like a good girl, or I'll have to help you
do it."

"The best thing you can do about anything right now is
leave me alone," 1 began, finally understanding that sim-
ply ignoring him would not get rid of him. I was about to
add something about discipline never being a problem for
a real leader, but he was suddenly standing next to the
settle and staring down at me, and then he was reaching
out with both hands, as though to take my arms. it all
happened so fast 1 was barely able to blurt, "Hey,
don't. . . !" before his hands reached my arms—with a
result he hadn't expected.

He didn't quite scream with the pain as the electric-blue
sparks flared, throwing him back away from me, but he
did shout as he fell, a wordless sound of hurt and shock. I
sat up as fast as I could, seeing InThig on its feet near my
tent entrance, a flinching sympathy in its blazing red eyes

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER       183

r

for the man who now crouched on -all fours on my carpet-
ing, trying to keep himself from collapsing. His nervous
system had had a really nasty jolt, and I was faintly
surprised that he wasn't flattened.

"Were you bom stupid, or did you have to practice?" I
demanded as I got to my feet, looking down at his shud-
dering body. "Didn't anyone ever teach you better than to
try to put your hands on a sorceress? Nothing happened to
you yesterday because we were supposed to be fighting.
and i don't consider it fair to use defensive magic during a
physical fight. Are you all right?"

"Never better," he gasped, head down, still trying to
recover control of his body. "If that's what you had in
mind as a reception for Kadrim and Zail, I shouldn't have
wasted my time interfering. Or maybe I was doing them
more of a favor than I knew."

"Do you want me to call someone to help you back to
your tent?" 1 asked, ignoring everything else he'd said.
"You should be feeling better in the morning, but not
much before that. You're lucky you're not unconscious—or
dead."

"Yeah, lucky." he muttered, taking a deep breath be-
fore slowly beginning to push-himself back to his feet.
Once erect, he added, "I always have been a lucky devil.
And thanks for the offer of help, but 1 think I can make it
on my own. Have a pleasant evening."

He looked at me once, the oddest expression in those
bronze eyes, his right hand rubbing his left arm, and then
he turned and moved slowly and painfully toward the way
out. InThig shifted out of his path without comment, but.
once the silk had fallen back to cover the entrance, it made
up for the lack.

"Laciel, that was obscene," it growled, those red eyes
now lacking all traces of compassion, "And I would like
to know how you did that. I was under the impression that
Graythor had protected him from your magic."

"Graythor obviously protected him from offensive
magic," I said with a shrug, feeling a good deal more tired
than the activities of the day would account for. "He
triggered one of my defensive spells, which can be consid-

184

SHARON GREEN

ered him taking rather than me giving. I still don't know
what the man expected that idiocy to accomplish."

"He expected to try reasoning with you," InThig re-
turned, not far from bristling tike the cat it pretended to
be. "In my opinion, your treatment of him should have
earned you far more, as it did so long ago with Graythor.
A brisk paddling or two would do you no end of good.*'

"How sweet of you to be so concerned about me,
InThig," I responded, feeling my body stiffen along with
my tone as I met that flaming red gaze. "I can't tell you
how much I appreciate it, but there's something else I
don't mind telling you at all: if you're that much on his
side, 1 think you'd do better staying in his tent."

The red eyes stared at me in silence for a moment,
unblinking and unreadable, and then the big black head
nodded very slowly.

"Perhaps 1 would at that," it allowed in a very even
tone, closing the subject with a finality I really hadn't
expected to hear. It turned then and padded out of the tent,
silent and flowing like a brief, gentie breeze in the heat of
the night, and then was as quickly gone. I stood there
staring for a moment but it really was gone, taking me at
my word as it had never done before. I turned slowly from
the entrance to look around at my empty tent, my bare feet
chilly despite the warmth of the carpeting under them, then
just as slowly went to my bed.

Lying down across a wide, comfortable bed is supposed
to feel really good. but there are times when nothing in the
entire universe has the power to make you feel good. More
than anything it felt the way it had all those years I could
still remember so clearly, curling up in a shivering ball on
the floor of some deserted warehouse, hungry and cold and
all alone. There was no silk cover under my cheek, only
my arm protecting it from splintered and filthy boards,
nothing to look forward to once that night was done but
more nights and days of the same. And through it all I had
to be strong and brave, never flinching or showing when I
was hurt, never backing away in fear—and never crying.

I moved around on the very soft cover, feeling the tears
already in my eyes, too miserable to be as disgusted with
myself as I should have been. Rikkan Addis had been hurt

',..

*•.

^

185

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

by my automatic defenses, but I hurt a lot more and
basically it was all his fault. If not for him 1 would still
believe that 1 really meant something special to someone,
that I really wasn't so different that no one but Morgiana
could ever love me. Right then I felt uglier and more
unwanted than I ever had in my life, and the pain was
worse than I would have thought possible.

Zail, beautiful Zaii. where would those gray eyes be
looking if you weren't under a spell? Probably at Dranna,
but certainly not at me. Your lips were so gentle and warm
that I wasn't frightened at all, or at least not much. And
Kadrim—would we even be friends if not for magic, or
would you be totally uninterested in silliness like that? I
rolled over onto my stomach to stare down at my hands,
but blurriness kept me from seeing them clearly. I felt like
such an absolute fool, such a naive, believing infant, an
imbecile who blindly accepted everything told her. Graythor
had warned me not to believe, but I hadn't understood his
warning so I had ignored it. So much for thinking you
knew everything there was to know.

I swiped at my eyes with the back of my right hand, but
it didn't do any good. The tears were still leaking out in
the sort of shamefaced way that they had, knowing how
much 1 didn't want them but forcing themselves through
anyway. I was sure Su never cried like a baby. and if
Dranna ever did it would only be for a purpose, never
helplessly out of misery. I wondered briefly if she had ever
used tears on Rik, and then moaned when I remembered
something she'd said about him. She'd talked about it
being a good thing he wouldn't be "pursuing his own
interest," which meant she'd seen something I hadn't
thought of. If it was bad having two men of our group
arguing over me, wouldn't it be worse with alt three of
them doing it? That was only logical, which meant Rik
was also under the spell—and would have been right there
with the other two if we hadn't gotten off on the wrong
foot with each other and then stayed there. The men would
spend their time arguing, fighting, and trying to outmaneu-
ver each other, I would be too starry-eyed at all the
attention to see the truth, and the quest would end up
going downhill into total oblivion. It was attack from a

186

SHARON GREEN

direction we never would have suspected even after it was
too late, an attack more vicious than anything we'd faced
yet, even on the forest world.

I sat up and folded my legs in front of me, wiped at my
eyes again, then looked around my tent. The enemy had
found a way to reach me even there, even in the middle of
me haven I had created, and 1 knew I would never be able
to forget about or forgive that particular invasion. Every-
thing about the quest had suddenly changed for me, except
for the most important part: the overwhelming desire to
succeed. That part of it was stronger than ever now, fueled
by humiliation and rage and bottomless pain. 1 had no
doubt that the enemy and 1 would eventually meet face to
face, and I looked forward to that time as I had never
looked forward to another. Striking from an unseen direc-
tion is often unwise; if the blow lands wrong, you haven't
taken from your opponent's strength but added to it.

I knew it was already full dark out, knew I ought to eat
the food I'd created and then get a good night's sleep, but
I had no appetite and my eyes didn't seem to be in the
mood to close. I stared around at the beautiful but silently
empty tent, wishing magic could provide the truly impor-
tant things in life, then lay back again to imagine what it
might have been like to be held in the arms of a man who
really loved me. I knew then that I'd never find out for
certain, but even dangerous, powerful sorceresses arc enti-
tled to dream.

^~
&•

CHAPTER 6

1 was up and out so early the next morning that I had time
to saddle all the horses before anyone else began stirring.
The rising sun was streaking the sky with a heavy, un-
friendly red, but I stood looking up at it without feeling the
least intimidated. I was ready for that world and whatever
it would throw at us, ready in a way i wasn't supposed te
be. I had even had a good breakfast to make up for the meal
I'd missed the night before, which I intended counting as
the first victory of the day. There would be other victories
later to til! a different hollow inside me, a hollow I really
needed to have filled.

"You were rather wise suggesting I spend the night with
Rik," a quiet, nearly diffident voice said from behind me,
breaking into my examination of the sky. "He was in a
good deal of pam for a time, and welcomed my presence
and assistance. Your own night passed more peacefully, I
hope?"

"Yes, it did," I answered shortly, making no effort to
turn and look at the demon. I'd forgotten for a while that
you can't trust anyone but yourself not to turn on you, but
I'd been reminded of that fact the night before. The last
thing I needed just then was someone who thought I ought
to be beaten—by its brand-new, bosom-buddy fnend.

"Well, then—everything's fine, then, isn't it?" the very
hearty words came after the pause I hadn't used to add
anything, the pause that had grown rather awkward. "To-

187

188

SHARON GREEN

night, of course, f'll be back in my usual place near your
bed."

"Don't bother," I said and then walked away, making
sure there was nothing to show that I'd had that nightmare
again the night before. I'd never been able to remember
that nightmare once I was awake, but 1 always knew it was
me same one—and me night before InThig hadn't been
there to tell me everything was all right when I awoke
from it. I'd remembered then that InThig was with some-
one it liked better, but 1 hadn't cried; I'd learned a long
tune ago that tears don't do a damned thing to help-

i wandered around a little until the others began emerg-
ing from their pavilions, then mounted my gray and waited
a short distance from the other horses. Su raised a hand to
me in greeting as she passed and I nodded in return, but
that was about it as far as my capability for the amenities
went. I was on the quest to protect the group and to be a
part of it, but I no longer wanted to be a part of it. I would
shield them with magic, provide what they needed, and
fight with everything in me to see that they won—but I
didn't want to be one of them.

It didn't take long before everyone was mounted, so I
banished the camp with a word and then followed when Su
took up the trail again. All in all everyone seemed rather
subdued that morning, and the landscape we were riding
through did nothing to encourage friendly conversation.
Tall grass surrounded us just about as far as the eye could
see, with larger and smaller stands of trees scattered hap-
hazardly through it, a world that felt empty and yet not
empty, full of life that wasn't our sort. Even that early in
the morning the cool of darkness was being chased away.
letting us know that the heat of the day would probably be
something special. The horses, clearly well-rested, were
making no attempt to rush the pace, which meant they
knew what was coming. It would have been nice if we
could have said the same—about something other than the
heat.

"You were right," a voice came from my left, and
Rikkan Addis moved up to ride beside me, about ten feet
back from where Su rode in the lead. "I couldn't quite
believe it last night, but this morning me pain is all gone.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        189

InThig said I activated your automatic defenses, so that
what happened most likely wasn't done deliberately. That's
another thing I wasn't ready to believe last night."

He chuckled very faintly and paused, as if waiting for
me to agree concerning my peaceful intentions, maybe
even waiting for me to share the joke- I didn't see any joke
and wasn't feeling very peaceful, so I just let the silence
stretch. After the gap had widened a bit, fearless leader got
the message-

"InThig is really upset," he said, all traces of jolly
amusement gone from his voice- "It said you two had an
argument last night, and when it tried to apologize this
morning, you refused to listen. It really cares for you,
Laciet; don't you think you're being too hard on it?"

"What 1 do is my business," I said. undoubtedly sound-
ing as distant as I felt. "When I want your opinions I'll
ask for them, and in the meantime you can let InThig care
about you. I don't need any garbage like that."

1 kicked my gray into moving forward away from him,
still not having looked at him even once. InThig had liked
him almost from the first moment it had met him, and I
hoped me two of them would be very happy together. As
far as 1 was concerned, I couldn't have cared less.

We continued in peace and quiet for a while, no more
than the sounds of our horses* hooves and the cries of
birds overhead breaking in, and then, without warning, we
were being attacked. The—things—rose up out of the
grass in front of us, white-eyed, greenish brown sheets that
spread out right in our path, rectangular and silent and
waiting for us with open arms. It was fairly clear what
would happen if any of us ended up clasped in those wide
embraces, and for an instant it seemed that Su, who was
ahead of me, would fall right into one. She had pulled
back on her reins at the first sight of the things, her pinto
trying desperately to obey, but the creature directly in front
of her was too close. It stood taller than horse and rider
together, and was emitting a sound of eagerness that could
be felt more than heard. It wanted to eat, and was just
about to do so.

My gray skidded to a halt in the midst of shouts and

SHARON GREEN

screams and almost reared, but my own calm helped to
keep him calm—and let me do what I was so ready to do.
1 raised my right hand and pointed to the creature that was
about one step away from enfolding Su and her horse, then
spoke the spell I'd decided on very early that morning.
There was a sound like the heavy rushing of air, and then
the blackness appeared right next to me creature; the thing
paused, turned white eyes on the blackness, then had time
for a single scream before it was absorbed. The blackness
had drawn it in and engulfed it, both at the same time. and
the creature hadn't had a chance.

There were other greenish brown sheets both in front of
us and to the sides, and 1 quickly moved the blackness
after them. They screamed when they saw it coming and
stared at it with very round eyes, but none of them tried to
run from it. I thought I knew why that was, and briefly felt
very sorry for the sheets, but there was nothing else I
could do. One by one the blackness engulfed them all,
searched briefly to make sure it hadn't missed any of
them, then disappeared with satisfaction when I spoke the
banishing word. I hadn't expected the thing to feel satis-
faction, and I had to hold back a shudder even as I got rid
of it. It was then that I noticed the heavy silence all
around, which Su broke after taking a deep breath.

"Don't know what those were, but I'm sure glad they're
gone," she said, raising one arm to blot at her forehead.
"Thought I'd had it there for a minute, and that's close
enough to hold me for a while. Didn't even have time to
clear my scabbard. What was that you used against them?"

"It was an entry to another plane," I answered, under-
standing that Su's long, involved speech—long for her,
that is—was a symptom of fear and relief. "It came to me
that what we faced on this world might be protected
against magic, so I prepared something that would handle
anything, protected or not. That plane doesn't contain life,
it seems to have a life of its own; its entries will go after
anyone calling them into being, unless the callers have
protected themselves, and then they'll go after anything
not protected. Ordinary warding won't stop them for an
instant; they're not using magic, so they don't have to be

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        191

able to See things. They simply engulf whatever's there,
no matter what shape it is, and then go looking for more.
My spell protected us and the horses, but not the sheets."

"Perhaps I am mistaken, yet does it seem as though
there is considerable danger in the use of such an—entry."
Kadnm's voice came from behind me, sounding faintly
worried, "is that plane not one which is best avoided?"

"The best way to avoid that plane is to know how to
reach it," 1 said, glancing back to see that he still held his
sword in his fist. "What you want to avoid doing is
stumbling over it while unprepared. 1 suppose most of the
Sighted remember the spell so that they'll never invoke it,
but then most of the Sighted don't engage in quests like
this one. We needed it so I used it, and now we'd better
get moving again."

No one seemed tembly eager to move on, but when it
came to other choices, we had none. Dranna had been
between Zail and Rik, white-faced and trembling with one
hand to her mouth, but even she hadn't protested going on.
We all knew that sitting in one place didn't mean we
would not be attacked again, so trying it wasn't worth the
effort. I didn't tell them that the sheets had probably been
under a compulsion to attack JIS—which was why they
hadn't run when they could have. If one life form was
under compulsion so might the rest of them be, and that
meant we'd have to wipe out future attackers rather than
finding it possible to drive them off. If that turned out to
be true, the rest of them would leam it soon enough.

We traveled on across that world, at first finding it
possible to avoid the stands of trees, but the time finally
came when the trail led right through the middle of one.
InThig went through first, ail senses alert, but nothing
jumped out at it in attack. We followed cautiously, ready
for just about anything, but the same thing happened with
us. No trap, no ambush, no attack—nothing-

" Don't any of you relax," Rikkan Addis said as soon as
were back in the open. his voice distracted and annoyed as
he continued to look around- "They're probably ready to
hit as soon as we do relax, and this sort of safe passage is
designed to make it happen, i don't want any of you on

192 SHARON GREEN

edge, but 1 do want you alert. Keep your eyes open and
we'll be fine.'*

"Fine," I echoed with a laugh, then urged my gray
after Su's pinto without adding anything. There's a big
difference between keeping up morale and lying in your
teeth, but fearless leader seemed never to have learned
that. I had the impression he wasn't very happy with my
comment, but didn't bother turning around to check.

Fifteen minutes later we learned how "fine" we were
' going to be. The pack of dog-like things jumped out at us
from me tall grass the way the sheets had, but they were
considerably faster and a lot more agile. InThig was at-
tacked first and then they were leaping at the rest of us,
snarls and growls mixing with screams and shouts and the
neighing of horses. Most of them were various shades of
brown but the teeth in their mouths were pure white,
something we were able to see much too easily. Before we
were able to blink they were in our laps, and the fight was
on for certain.

The first two or three that came at me died quickly,
engulfed in blue, but 1 was too busy trying to stay in my
saddle to really notice. My gray was also being attacked
and was fighting back with hooves and teeth, nearly un-
seating me in the process. When 1 was finally able to look
around I saw that Su and the men were using daggers
rather than swords, and InThig had taken care of the ones
that had gone after it and was now back helping with the
rest. The barks and growls and screams were nearly deaf-
ening and the brown bodies were beginning to be piled
high, but they were still coming on. 1 quickly spoke a spell
of power, hoping it would do some good, but no such luck.
The dog-things were warded, and all my spell did was
make them shiver, as though shaking water off their backs.

I would have enjoyed muttering curses under my breath,
but you can't do that and speak a spell at the same time. I
looked at the dog-things and Saw down to the bones and
hearts of them, described their basic patterns, then created
me daggers keyed to those patterns. The long, sharp dag-
gers winked into existence, gleamed silver in the sunlight,
then quickly turned a smeared red as they began doing

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

193

their job. Growls turned to screams and whines and yelps,
men disappeared into twitching silence; in a matter of
minutes the daggers were done, and so were the dog-things.

It would have been nice if we could have ridden away
from there then, but just about everyone but me had been
clawed and bitten and first needed to be healed. 1 kept the
daggers on alert as I first Saw to the horses and then the
people, mending them one at a time as I had no choice
about doing. You can get away with mass healing if
everyone has a headache or indigestion or a fever, banish-
ing the ailment in general rather than getting down to
specifics; when it comes to wounds, though, you rarely
have anything but specifics.

Once everyone was taken care of we moved on again,
grimly determined to remember that we were moving
toward the gate oul of there, not just on to the next attack on
the list. After the first few minutes 1 got rid of the daggers
that were keyed to the dog-things, certain the next, group
of attackers would be something new, and it turned out I
was right. The sun had risen angry and hot, making the air
around us heavy and too quiet, and that's the direction the
open-ended balloons came from, the over-bright, too-silent
sky. Unfortunately for them their shadows gave us warn-
ing, and we looked up to see them no more than fifty feet
above us, descending rapidly like gaping, orange mouths
moving soundlessly in for the kill.

Dranna gave a small gasp of horror, but even she was
becoming too used to being attacked to go all screaming
and hysterical. The sound of swords being drawn was a
single sound, caused by everyone doing it at the same
moment, but there was no need to let things come to
close-up combat. I spoke the spell and gestured in the
necessary arc, and when the balloon things reached a
height of ten feet above us, they began frying and explod-
ing in fiery blue sparks. I'd extended one of my personal
defenses to cover all of us, a defense I wouldn't have been
able to make adequate use of if the balloons had been as
substantial, say, as the dog-things. For some reason spread-
ing out a field tike that thins it, making it more and more
tenuous the more it's stretched. The dog-things might have

SHARON GREEN

194

sizzled a little going through it, but that would have been
alt; the balloon things were too flimsy to ignore even that
weak a charge, and as they fell into it they fried and
burned.

As soon as all the balloon-mouths were caught in the
field, we rode away from the greasy smudges floating in
the still air. It would have been nice if everything could
have been kept away from us that easily, but it wasn't a
fun-time joy ride we were on. The next attackers were
very tiny but their teeth weren't, and they soared out of a
nearby stand of trees to reach us. The others needed to be
healed again after that, and the silence we rode on in was
thicker than it had been.

Noon seemed to take a very long time coming, even
longer than what we went through would account for. The
heat rose higher and higher, there was no knowing when
we would spring the next trap, and some of the waits
between attacks were worse than the attacks themselves.
By the time Rikkan Addis decided to call a rest stop, we
al! fett as though we'd been traveling on that world for a
week.

"I don't think I have the strength to climb out of this
saddle," Zail said when we stopped, voicing the thoughts
of just about everybody. "If the afternoon turns out to be
anything like the morning, we'll be six piles of bones
when we reach the gate."

"But we will reach it," Rikkan Addis said, eyeing the
soap-bubble sphere I'd surrounded us with before beginning
to dismount. "Once we get there we can take a decent
rest, but there's no sense in wasting whatever rest we can
get out of this stop. And ! want everyone to eat first, as
much as they can stuff down. You can't keep going if your
insides are empty."

Nothing but a few groans greeted those words of wis-
dom; if I hadn't been so wilted from the heat I would
certainly have found some sort of comment to make, but I
was too hot, and also too distracted by the experiment I
was trying. The heat of a sun like the one above us was a
good deal more substantial than most people realized, and
substance was a major building block of magic. That
world was draining us with its heat as well as with traps

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

195

and ambushes; if things worked out right, it would now
start giving some of that back.

It took a few minutes, but eventually all of us were on
our feet and the horses were left alone to graze. We
ignored the tall, waving grass outside the bubble and tried
to make ourselves comfortable, all of us picking a solitary
piece of ground to sit or lie on—all of us, that is, but Rik.
Fearless leader had been the first to notice that Dranna was
sitting on the ground and crying quietly, a hopeless, strength-
less sound to the thing, so he'd been the one to go over,
crouch down, and put an arm around her. He spoke to her
very softly, so softly that his words didn't reach any of the
rest of us, and after a short while they seemed to help. The
small woman nodded, as though wearily agreeing to some-
thing, then dabbed at her eyes before joining Rik in check-
ing what the food baskets held. I lay back in the grass I'd
shortened and closed my eyes, not yet up to having an
interest in food.

I suppose the only one of us who didn't fall asleep was
InThig, who continued to prowl around outside the bubble
and, for the most part, out of sight. I awoke to find that
not much time had passed, but I still felt alert and alive
and as full of energy and strength as it was possible to be
without needing to jump up and down, clapping hands and
squealing in delight. That last wouldn't have fit in well
with the rest of my continuing mood, but I still felt a large
measure of satisfaction over my experiment having proven
a success. The bubble around us was converting the heat
of the sun into energy human bodies could absorb, and
even though I was expending strength in maintaining the
complex spell, the return was greater than the expenditure.
I'd adapted the system plants use, hoping the modification
would work with something I hadn't Seen except in the
unmodified state, and I'd been successful. I sat up and
stretched comfortably, knowing I'd been taking a chance
with the experiment, but there hadn't been much choice, if
we'd had to go on the way we were, we might not have
made it to the next gate.

"The others seem to be deep in slumber yet," a voice
said from my right, more of a whisper than a normal
announcement. "We two alone appear to be awake."

196              SHARON GREEN

I looked over at Kadrim where he crouched beside me,
seeing the restored vitality in his eyes—as well as some-
thing more. Just as he'd said, we seemed to be the only
two awake, and that fact pleased him—the way it was
meant to.

"It won't be long now before everyone's awake," I
said, keeping my voice just as low, but a good deal more
neutral. "I'm going to get something to eat."

I rose to my feet without waiting for any sort of com-
ment, which seemed to surprise him to some extent. I
could feel that surprise following behind me as 1 walked to
the nearest food basket and bent to see what I wanted, and
then he was crouching beside me again.

"Are you perhaps disturbed by the disagreement in
which I allowed myself to become involved last dark-
ness?" he asked almost at once, a faint discomfort color-
ing the question. "It was not my intention to cause you
upset, yet did I feel that it was more than time I spoke of
my true feelings. There will not be such heated words
between Zail .and myself again till the quest has been
completed, yet would I .have you know that I mean to
press for your hand at mat time."

"Which hand did you intend pressing for?" I asked,
glancing at him in innocent curiosity as I withdrew a roast
chicken leg and a corn biscuit from the basket. "I tend to
use my right hand more often in spells, but I can also use
my left if I have to."

"Which hand?" he echoed, staring at me with the sort
of confusion that made him seem as young as he looked.
"Perhaps I have failed to make myself sufficiently clear,
girl. Though I speak of pressing for your hand, it is all of
you I mean to have—in proper marriage. You will then be
my queen, and I will conquer the world and lay it at your
feet as a bride gift."

"I feel as though I'm repeating myself, but which world
did you intend conquering?" I asked between bites of the
still-warm chicken, giving him only a little more attention
than I was giving to the food. "Some wizards claim there
are an infinite number of worlds, and if that's true, what's
just one world among them? Especially if it happens to be

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        197

a world like this one. Ugh. Once this quest is over, I
intend keeping it as far away from my feet as possible."

"I—ah—I, too, feel the same," he said, a strangely
helpless look in those blue eyes, his hand on the food
basket in what appeared to be an attempt to keep a grip on
reality and normalcy. "It would, of course, be my own
worid which I conquered for you. It would please you to
be queen of so lovely a world, would it not?"

"Morgiana says being a queen is dull,*' I told him,
looking into the basket again for the fried potatoes that
should have been there. "Once, while she was still a
sorceress at about my level of power, she made herself
queen of some place or other. None of the natives were
able to stand against her magic, of course, but she couldn't
take the boredom for more than a year before she gave the
place back and left. Once sorcerers and sorceresses reach a
certain level in their studies, they're encouraged to do that
sort of thing if they find the idea at all attractive. Some of
them stay kings or queens and never go on to being
wizards, but most prefer studying magic to ruling."

"!—see," he said very quietly, looking away with an
expression that was worse than an open wound. "Perhaps
this discussion had best wait till the quest is done with.
One need not be a king, nor go aconquering . . ,"

He straightened to standing without finishing his sen-
tence and simply walked away, more hurt than I'd wanted
him to be, but harmed less than my encouraging him
would have done. When the quest was over he'd be free of
the spell, and also free of the need to find all sorts of
excuses as to why he wasn't quite as interested in me as
he'd thought he was. I stopped stuffing my face very
briefly as I watched him go, feeling the emptiness beside
me that the presence of a friend would have filled, then
sneered at myself as I deliberately went back to eating.
Only me weak needed someone beside them to lean on,
and I wasn't weak. If I hadn't yet teamed how much better
being alone was, I'd be stupid beyond redemption.

I continued to eat everything that interested me, sipping
now and then from a cup of ale, and then another male
body materialized on my right, sitting down instead of
crouching. A big hand slid across my back before coming

198              SHARON GREEN

to rest on my left arm, and two lips brushed my cheek with
a kiss.

"You poor thing, you're all wet from the heat of this
place," Zail said, true commiseration and pity in his voice.
'*If this quest was any less important than it is, I'd insist
that you be allowed to go back to a civilized world. Like
the world I'll be taking you to once this is all over, my
own world. You'll love it there, Laciel, and my family
will be as crazy about you as I am. I was going to give the
Living Flame to my father, to add to our collection, but I
think 1*11 give it to you instead, as a wedding gift."

"The Living Flame," I mused, really having a hard
time keeping myseif from reacting to his nearness and
caresses. "That's an old scepter, isn't it? I'm not very
interested in things like that, Zail. but you don't have to
worry about having only one of it to give away. I'll make
a second."

"You'll—what?" he asked sitting very still and sound-
ing as if he hadn't heard right before laughing an abrupt,
dismissive laugh. "Silly girl, you can't make a copy of a
work of an like that and expect it to be worth anything. A
copy's only a copy."

"But Zail, with magic it won't be a copy," I protested,
turning my head to look at him the same way I'd looked at
Kadrim- "At my level of ability what you'll have will be
an exact duplicate, so exact that no one will ever be able to
tell them apart. I could even make three or four if you
liked, or maybe duplicate your entire collection. Then you
and your father could each have your own collection."

'Three or four duplicates of a one-of-a-kind master-
piece," he said woodenly, staring at me in veiled horror as
he took his arm back. "Two or three or a dozen exact
copies of a collection unmatched anywhere for a thousand
years." His muttered words stopped as he shook his head,
his face pale as though he were shaking off a nightmare,
and then he tried really hard to give me a warm smile.
"Maybe we'd better wait a short while before discussing
this again," he said, raising his fingertips to my cheek in a
distracted sort of way. "I'm sure I can make you under-
stand—but not now, not right now."

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        199

He got to his feet and walked away more quickly than
Kadnm had, but this time I didn't watch. Instead I emptied
my cup of ale quickly, then let it refill itself in accordance
with my spell. Two down and none to go, and the second
had hurt far worse than the first. If his interest had been
real I probably couldn't have done it, but if his interest had
been real I wouldn't have had to. Neither Kadrim nor Zail
had known, deep down where it matters, that I was a
sorceress; now they knew, and even the spell couldn't
keep them from having second thoughts.

1 doggedly continued eating as though nothing of partic-
ular consequence had happened, and by the time I was
through everyone was awake. Fearless leader and Dranna
were the last to come out of it, and they'd had most of
their meat before they'd slept. They each had a little
something to add to it, Dranna smiling vaguely at Rik
before taking hers over to Su before eating it, and then we
were ready to go. Even the horses were well-rested and
dancing in their eagerness to go on, but no one seemed to
notice that they and we were no longer exhausted. They
were apparently assuming the naps had done the trick, and
I was just as pleased; me last thing 1 was in the mood to
give was another lecture on ma^ic.

InThig was back with us again as soon as we started off.
talking to its good friend Rik about what was ahead of us,
but it needn't have bothered. What was ahead of us was
more attacks, which would have been boring and repeti-
tious if they hadn't been trying so hard for our blood.
Through it all we just kept going, and finally proved that
perseverance pays; after a little more than two hours, Su
raised her dripping sword and pointed to the left.

"Trail goes behind those trees," she panted, looking
around to make sure there weren't any more poison-birds
diving at us. "Can't see it coming out again anywhere, so
maybe the gate's there."

"It damned well better be," Rik said, but with more
hope than the words would indicate. "If we have to go on
until sundown on this world—" The sentence broke off as
his jaw tightened, but he didn't have to finish it No one
had been hurt in the last couple of skirmishes, but it had

SHARON GREEN

200

been a near thing. "Let's take a look before the next wave
hits."

Our horses moved carefully through the bodies of the
poison-birds on the ground all around us, some of them
seared rather than slashed, and then we were able to pick
up a little speed. The stand of trees wasn't very far away,
and once we got a bit closer I was able to See a glowing
slit just beyond them.

"It's there," I told the others, feeling their immediate
excitement and relief, emotions I shared completely. "Now
we can get out of here."

"Don't anyone get sloppy!" Rikkan Addis growled,
taking a brief moment out from searching all around to
glance at us. "If there's anything set to guard this gate, we
won't be able to scare it—"

"Behind you!" InThig shouted from up ahead, coming
back again to rejoin us- "Run for the gate!"

We glanced back to see the twisted, lumbering shapes
shuffling after us, grotesque horrors that didn't appear fast
or agile—only unstoppable. Some of them had picked up
poison-bird bodies and were chewing them up in their
maws, getting a good deal of pleasure from the snack,
which told us more about them than we wanted to know.
Running did seem the smartest way to go, and we weren't
slow getting on with it.

We thundered up to the gate and slid to a stop, half-fell
from our saddles and, hearts pounding, quickly formed our
chain. Zai! raced two horses through, then Dranna, then
Rik with the last of them, all of us giving fervent thanks
that we'd done it often enough before mat hurrying was
possible. Kadi-tin's hand in mine was completely steady,
but I was sure he was very glad that InThig was there
beside him. As soon as the last of the horses was cleared
out of the way he jumped through, and then we were all on
the other side of the gate.

"Made it!" Zail crowed with a laugh, clapping Kadrim
on the shoulder in true relief and delight. "They almost
had us, but we made it. Where's InThig?"

"I'm sure it can take care of itself," Rik said, but mere
was a frown on his face as he stared at the gate behind me.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

201

"It may have gotten delayed, but it'll be through in a
minute."

There was a general murmur of agreement from the
others, more a matter of trying for confidence than making
it, and all of them were now staring behind me. 1 took two
more deep breaths to get back what strength I could from
the transfer, then I straightened up.

"If it's not through by now, it needs help," I said, tired
of the way fearless leader always tried to gloss things over.
"I'm going back to give that help."

"You can't." Rik said at once, the look sharpening in
his eyes as he grabbed my arm to keep me from turning.
"If InThig is having a problem, all you'll succeed in doing
is getting yourself killed. I'll go."

"And Just how do you intend doing that?" 1 asked in
annoyance, pulling my arm out of his grip- "You can't
even See a gate, let alone use one. And what do you think
you'd accomplish? Even if you could stop me?"

His expression darkened as it usually did when we
exchanged words, a perfect match to the dark, dismal
countryside I barely noticed all around us. There was
nothing he could say in answer to my questions, something
that really seemed to get to h»m, but I had other concerns
just then above his ruffled indignation. I gave him a last
look of disgust, then turned again to face the gate.

"Wait," his voice came again, accompanied by his big
hand on my shoulder. "You're not going aione. Either I
go with you, or I will do my damnedest to stop you."

"And what about the rest of us?" Zail put in, sounding
the least bit outraged- "InThig has saved our necks often
enough; don't you think that entitles us to do the same for
him?"

"It," I corrected automatically, helpless to keep from
putting my hand to my mouth as I stared at the piace we
had come through from the last world. It was a lot colder
and damper in that new world, but that wasn't the reason 1
began trembling.

"What's wrong with you, girl?" Rikkan Addis asked
with a frown in his voice, his hand on my shoulder un-
doubtedly giving him more of a message than the others
were getting. "Why are you looking around like that?"

202 SHARON GREEN

I didn't answer him at once, most especially as he was
wrong; I wasn't looking around, but he wasn't equipped to
know the difference. I felt numb inside, not to mention
cold and frightened, but it all made a horrible kind of
sense.

"So that's why we were under almost constant attack on
that world," I said, still looking everywhere but at the
people behind me. "And why those things showed up just
when they did, close but not too close. They weren't
meant to make us fight, just to make us hurry."

"What are you talking about?" Rikkan Addis asked
with surprising gentleness, turning me around to face the
worry in his eyes in the same way. "Something's hap-
pened, I can see that just from looking at you. Tell me
what's wrong."

"The last attack on that other world," I repeated as
patiently as I could, feeling very distant but wanting him
to know. "We weren't being attacked; we were being
herded, straight to the gate and through it as fast as
possible. The enemy didn't want to kill us, he wanted us
to come through here, to this world."

"But why should he want that?" was me next question,
as patient as my explanation had been. "The trail of the
balance stone leads here; why would he want us following
it?"

"Because this world is special," I said, for some reason
fascinated by his bronze eyes. 'I've never been to a world
like this before, and I can understand why. This world
doesn't allow magic."

"Are you sure?" he asked as the others all made sounds
or exclamations of shock, his hands tightening just a little
on my arms. "Are you positive mere's nothing you can do
in the way of magic? That will mean we've got nothing
but swords to defend ourselves with, and no way to pre-
tend we're natives."

"And no way to get food or shelter," Zail put in,
sounding worried. "And what happens if we run into more
patrols?"

"Don't any of you understand?" I demanded, interrupt-
ing comments and worries alike, finally looking around at

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

203

them. "On this world I can't See, I'm as blind as the rest
of you. Don't you know what that means?"

They stared at me in silence, their expressions of blank-
ness completely eloquent, and 1 hardly noticed it when
Rikkan Addis took his hands from my arms. They didn't
understand, and suddenly I was very reluctant to tell them.

"I can't See." I repeated in a mutter, putting one hand
to my eyes as I forced myself to say it. "That gate we just
came through—when 1 looked for it, it wasn't there any
longer— If you can't See a gate, you can't use it— Damn
it all, we're trapped on this world for good!"

CHAPTER 7

The silence stretched on and on, a numb, shocked silence
that I understood perfectly. I stood there in the chill with
one hand over my eyes, feeling no desire to do anything
else, feeling like the absolute and complete failure that I
was. If I hadn't let myself be rushed like that, if I had been
a little more careful before stepping blithely through a
one-way gate— And InThig. InThig would have expected
me to come back, to help— But 1 couldn't go back, I no
longer had the ability to do it, and somehow I knew I'd
never see the demon again.

"Now what do we do?" Dranna asked, her voice as
lifeless as my own spirit felt. "Choose a piece of land and
start fanning it? Find a city and beg on the streets until we
have enough money to open a shop? I've never been
stranded in a strange world before; is there some sort of
protocol to be followed?"

"The first thing we do is stay calm," Rikkan Addis
answered her, but obviously speaking to everyone else as
well. "If we panic or start running around screaming and
shouting, we never will get out of this. To begin with,
we'll have to find out where we are, what sort of people
live on this world, and whether or not the whole thing is
the way this part is. Maybe there's a part of it where
Laciel won't be blind."

"Don't know about that, but I do have a question," Su
said, and then her arm was around my shoulders. "Laciel,

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

205 i

why would it be that you can't do magic—but I can still
see the trail?"

Everyone started talking at once at that, desperately
grasping at the straw Su was holding out, but it wasn't a
real loophole that she'd found. I sighed and took my hand
away from my eyes, then sadly shook my head.

"Su, you're forgetting there's a difference between hav-
ing a magical ability and having the ability to do magic," I
said, looking up at her still-calm face. "There are some
magical abilities, like luck, and a talent for fixing things
and—yes, trail-finding—that seem to work anywhere, on
every world there is, under all conceivable circumstances-
Having the Sight isn't the same, because there are some
worlds where having it doesn't mean you can use it. It has
something to do with the foundations of a particular world,
what its primal building blocks were, that sort of thing. If
there's no magic in a world's roots, magic can't be done
there even if its natives know about the ability."

"That may be so, but now we don't have to wonder
what to do next," Rikkan Addis jumped in, briskly over-
riding everyone's disappointment. "We follow Su while
she follows the trail, and wait until it runs out before
racking our brains for what to do after that. If we get very
lucky, something might come *up before that. Let's get
mounted and use what's left of the daylight.''

His Persuasion-backed enthusiasm spilled over onto ev-
eryone, another proof of what I'd said about abilities, but
if Su hadn't insisted, I wouldn't have gone along with it.
Even if there had still been some point to the expedition,
there wouldn't have been one in my tagging along, but Su
refused to let me stay behind, basking in the glory I'd
earned. She made me mount up along with everyone else,
then began following the trail she was still able to see-
There wasn't altthat much left to the day around us, and
what there was seemed well suited to the landscape. We
were in the middle of scrubby, unenthusiastic woods, thin,
frail-looking trees, tired bushes, short, patchy grass. The
browns and greens appeared washed-out and dingier than
they should have been, the muddiness of them compounded
by the heavy clouds not far above the tree-tops. There
probably wasn't even as much as an hour left until dark,

206 SHARON GREEN

and the temperature was chilly on the way to being cold,
Under other circumstances we would have made camp—but
under those circumstances we had nothing to make camp
with.

A few short minutes of riding brought us to a road, or
what seemed to be used as a road by the natives. It was
narrow and rutted and completely uncared for, a back-
woods track that probably turned to mud with every mod-
erately heavy rain. Our horses snorted and slowed once
they were on it, distrusting the uneven footing, and it
wasn't long before we separated to ride to either side of
the thing. There was no sense in risking losing one or
more of our mounts, even if we were going nowhere but to
a dead end.

The scrub woods changed to dark, desolate countryside,
with nothing to be seen in the way of human habitation. 1
was certain the world was inhabited by humans, but as
time passed the conviction grew more and more uncertain.
Everything seemed to be more mute than silent, more
oppressed than quiet, more tremblingly frightened than
noiseless, more in hiding than simply out of sight. I didn't
like the feel of that world, the lack of both friendliness and
hostility, and after a while it came to me that I wasn't the
only one to react that way. Not a single word was being
exchanged among the others, and we seemed to be taking
turns looking behind us.

We kept going even after full dark had fallen; none of us
or the mounts were particularly tired, and there wasn't
much risk to losing our way. Su didn't need tight to see
the trail, and the ground next to the road continued to be
consistent and even. I didn't know what fearless leader
expected to find at me end of the trail other than the end of
his bright hopes along with it, but he seemed to be deter-
mined to get there. I was too depressed to care if we made
it or not, and the only bright spot I could find in what had
happened was the fact that I'd never have to face Graythor
and tell him I'd failed. I'd never sec Graythor again, or alt
the people who were going to die because of that failure,
but that didn't mean they wouldn't walk my dreams for as
long as I lived.

"There!" Kadrim said suddenly from his place in front

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

207

of me, drawing everyone's attention. "] had thought at
first I was mistaken, yet now— There are campfires."

"Half a dozen at least, and no one making an effort to
conceal their existence," Rik agreed, his voice out of the
dark behind Dranna calm and thoughtful. "Kadrim, you
and Su stay with the girls. Zail and I will take a closer,
private look before we ride in and introduce ourselves."

We had ail come to a halt by then, and the fires they had
been discussing were clearly visible to the right of the
road, in what seemed to be a partially sheltered comer of
the landscape. The campsite wasn't ail that easily seen
from the direction in which we'd come, but it had to be
clearly apparent to anyone riding in the opposite direction.

"What's the sense in creeping around?" I asked, dislik-
ing being included in as one of "the girls." "Why can't
we all go together? We'll have to deal with these people at
some time or other, so why not now?"

"Best we leam first what it is we shall be dealing
with," Kadrim answered very softly, his shadow-form
looking ahead rather than turning back to me. "Hush now,
girl, for your words may well carry—and our companions
have already gone."

I turned back to see where" Rik and Zail had been riding,
only to find their empty-saddlefl horses. Dranna had also
turned to look, and when she saw that the two men were
no longer behind us, she shivered somewhat and quickly
faced forward again. Neither one of us had heard them
leave, and that annoyed me; Kadrim had known they were
gone from a good deal farther away, but Dranna and I had
had to be told about it.

The horses had time to do a little snacking from the
roadside vegetation before our intrepid scouts got back, no
more than shifting shadows announcing their return. They
mounted up again with a creak of leather, gathered up their
reins, then Rik's outline looked around at us from his
place behind Dranna.

"There are eight campfires, one for each of the families
camped over there," he reported, his words soft but still
carrying to all of us. "Men, women and children, no
weapons visible, no horses but what looks like a small,
common herd of goat-like animals. They don't seem to

208 SHARON GREEN

have much in the way of possessions, and they're defi-
nitely camped rather than living in the area. They also
have a few small wagons with wooden traces and cross-
bars, which means they pull the things themselves. There
are also no guardposts set up, nothing but a few of the
older boys keeping an eye on the goats. The only thing I
don't like about the look of them is how quiet they all are.
even the children. Some of the men exchanged a few
words, and once one of the women spoke to two of the
children, but that was about it. It didn't feet natural."

"They seemed to be afraid but not afraid," Zail put in,
a groping in his tone. "They're not hiding, so they're
probably not afraid of being discovered, but there's still a
tension of some sort in them. It's their attitude—i don't
know how to describe it."

"You'll all have a chance to see it for yourselves."
Rikkan Addis said, tacitly agreeing with Zail. "We're
going to pay their camp a visit, and find out what there is
in the way of problems around here. I'm going to tell them
we're from a very distant country, and don't know this
part of the world at all. I want all of you to smile and be as
friendly as possible—but don't move far from your horses,
and let me do the talking. Let's go."

The plan sounded flimsy and inadequate, but there wasn't
much of a chance to object to it even if I'd wanted to.
Fearless leader moved out of line and rode ahead, and then
all of us were following him toward the campfires and the
people who had kindled them.

We were moving at little more than a walk when we
entered the large, communal camp, and every eye of every
person there seemed to be on us. Counting men, women
and children there must have been seventy people or more,
and every one of them stood and stared at us in silence.
They were a small people, short and slim and somehow
undernourished, even though they appeared to be fairly
welt fed. They all had brown hair and large brown eyes,
doe-eyes set in human faces, thin brown cloth covering'
their slender bodies, nothing in the way of shoes even on
the adults. Just as Zail had said, there was something
about the way they stood and stared at us, a bone-deep
fright beneath their silence and immobility, a desire to run

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        209

even though they didn't dare. The chill night-wind ruffling
their clothing and hair didn't seem to bother them, not
nearly as much as the sudden appearance of guests. When
we came to a full stop there was a moment of hesitation.
and then one of the men came forward to stand alone.

"Good evening to you, friend," Rikkan Addis said with
a smile as he looked down at him, deliberate warmth in his
tone. "Can you tell me what country we now ride in? We
come from very far away, you see, and have never ridden
these lands before."

"There is no more than one country, lord," the man
answered with what seemed like confusion, his accent so
thick that it was difficult to follow. "The land is Filim, all
of it, as far as a man can travel in a lifetime, in every
direction there is. There is no place that is not Filim, for
all of creation belongs to the god-king Thannar, blessed be
his name."

"Blessed be his name," echoed softly from everyone
else, an immediate chorus that was like a sigh of the wind.
Dranna shivered at the sound of that chorus, beating the
rest of us to it if everyone's expression meant they felt the
way I did. Those people had said what they had automati-
cally, without thinking about it,''and there was something
horrible in that sort of thing.

' "The god-king Thannar,'' Rik repeated, nodding thought-
fully as he abandoned his intended hne of attack. "And all
of you are, of course, completely loyal to him. Tell me
what you're doing out here, in the middle of nowhere."

The last sentence, I thought, had a lot of Persuasion
riding along with it, and the small man proved it by
responding at once.

"We have been sent from the city of Lar to the city of
Nor," he said, still looking only at Rik. "Nor is the
blessed city where our god-king keeps his court, and field
workers and servants are always in short supply. Many of
them get used up by the Sacred Guard, usually in their
frolics, and have to be replaced by those from other dis-
tricts and cities. It is the greatest of honors to be sent to
Nor, and our families will be blessed even unto the final
generation."

"1 see," Rik said, surely not missing the rote sound to

210 SHARON GREEN

what the man had said, his own face now expression less -
"You've been sent from Lar to Nor, so you're going. And
you certainly won't turn off somewhere, to lose yourselves
in the wilderness and begin farms of your own, will you?"

"Such a thing is absolutely forbidden," the small man
answered, his face paling and his voice beginning to qui-
ver. "Those who are damned and forever tost may attempt
such a thing, but never for long. Everyone is registered in
the city of their birth, everyone, and if they cannot be
accounted for, the Sacred Guard begins to search for them,
with trackers and snifters. No one has ever been left
unround, and when they are returned to civilization, they
are taken to the Heavenly Court. Death by torture is
preferable to being taken to the Heavenly Court."

The last words were muttered as the man looked down to
the ground, and still none of the others standing around
said anything. 1 didn't know who they thought Rikkan
Addis was, but I had the feeling they would have answered
his questions even if he hadn't used Persuasion. They had
clearly been trained to respond to authority in whatever
way authority demanded, and anyone who asked questions
was obviously in authority.

"And how far away from here is the city of Nor?" Rik
asked, his voice not far from a growl of rage. His right
hand had turned to a fist where it rested on his thigh, as
though he fought to keep it from closing on his sword hilt.

"Tomorrow morning will find us there," the man an-
swered, raising his targe, innocent eyes again. "You, on
your horses, will be there much sooner. They will cer-
tainly be pleased to see you and the gift you bring."

"Gift?" Rik echoed, this time being the one who was
confused. "What gift are you talking about?"

"Why, the gift you bring our god-king, of course," the
man said, trying not to appear as though he were stepping
out of his place. "Everyone was told about it, and we
knew you were the ones as soon as you rode in. • You
would say odd things and pretend to be strangers, we were
told, but of course you wouldn't be. And those who report
first sight of you to the Sacred Guard, even after you've
reached Nor, are exempt from being chosen for the frolics

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        211

for a full three months. We thank you for the opportunity,
lord."

Rik'sjaw tightened as the man and his people all bowed
to him, and he glanced at the rest of us with fury glowing
in his bronze eyes. Simply trapping us on that world
hadn't been enough for the enemy; he'd also arranged it so
that everyone would be on the lookout for us, and we'd
ridden into that camp as blind and unsuspecting as bunnies
hopping into a trap.

"Nice going, fearless leader," I commented, knowing it
no longer mattered who said what. "I realty have to hand
it to you. I never expected anyone to be able to top my
idiocy, but it looks like you've gone and done it."

"You were told to keep quiet." our glorious leader
growled, the look in those eyes focusing this time on me.
"See if you can find enough intelligence in that empty
blond head to understand simple instructions. It'll be hard
for you, I know, but do your best."

Why, the absolute nerve of that imbecile! I gasped at
what he'd said and opened my mouth to blast him back,
but Kadrim's hand closed tight around my arm, distracting
me and giving the imbecile enough time to turn back to the
native.                       ••

"You mentioned the gift we're -bringing to the god-
king," he said to the small man who was beginning to
look uncertain again. "You've answered all my questions
correctly so far, and this will be the last. What gift do we
bring?"

"Why, you bring the gift fit only for Thannar, blessed
be his name," the man responded, smiling tremulously
while the people behind him briefly became a chorus
again. "The gift is one sent to him by a brother god in
another creation, and he anticipates it with great impa-
tience. Our god-king is said to have a thousand females
who serve his godhood, but none like the gift sent to him
by his brother. She will shine forever as his prized posses-
sion, the female with hair tike clouds on a sun-bright day.
She will be his and his alone forevermore."

The man's eyes no longer looked at Rik or the ground,
and ! just sat there with lips parted, saying nothing. It was
me the man was looking at, just the way the rest of his

212 SHARON GREEN

people were, and for an instant I was shocked speechless.
Then the instant passed and 1 was cursing under my breath,
saying aloud every one of the words Morgiana disliked so
much. I realized my voice must be rising in volume when
Kadrim's hand closed around my arm again, but I didn't
give a damn. I was mad enough to chew nails, and iron
ones at that!

"I think we'll be leaving now," Rik said to the small
man, interrupting me just as I was really warming to
my subject. "We'll be going on to Nor, of course, and
thank you for the time and courtesy you've given us. We
wish you a pleasant night."

The small man bowed as he backed away, giving us
room to turn our horses, and he and his people raised their
hands as we rode out of the camp. I was so furious 1
hardly knew what I was doing, and didn't realize that
Kadrim had taken the rein of my gray until we stopped in
the dark, far enough away from that camp that the people
in it would have no idea that we had. I was back to
muttering under my breath, and would have ridden on if I
hadn't been stopped.

"I think it's safe to say we now have a more urgent and
pressing problem than what to do at the next gate," Rikkan
Addis said at once, faint disgust in his voice. "Apparently
everyone in this area has been told about us, which means
it's a damned good thing we stopped at that camp. The
city of Nor is just ahead of us, and if we'd ridden in there
instead, we'd never have ridden out again. We're going to
have to stay completely out of sight, which might not be
easy in a theocracy as restrictive as this one."

"Don't know why they were all looking at Laciel like
that," Su put in, her shadow form facing Rik. "Couldn't
follow much of what they were saying, their talk was so
strange. Sounded like they were saying something about a
gift."

"If I ever get off this world, I'm going to find the one
responsible for this and turn him inside out!" 1 swore,
feeling as though I were ready to foam at the mouth. "The
absolute gall of that creep, promising me as a gift to some
barbaric, backwoods medicine man! I'll take him apart
with my bare hands, I'll break every bone in his body, I'll—"

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        213

"Okay, enough," fearless leader interrupted, unbeliev-
ably sounding annoyed. "I can see you're in no condition
to discuss things rationally, but we can't afford to coddle
anyone any more. The best thing that happened back there
was when we were told about this gift business, because
that means the enemy is still worried about us and specific-
ally trying to neutralize you. If we were permanently
trapped on this world, that wouldn't be necessary, now
would it? It means there's a way off this world, and that
way involves magic. All we have to do is get to the gate,
and then find that way."

"Indeed," Kadrim said from my right with enthusiasm,
his sudden fire reflected by the others, even in the dark.
"It must surely be as you say, for there would be sense in
little else. We were meant to believe ourselves trapped
here, yet were precautionary measures taken should we fail
to cling to that belief, it will now be necessary to guard
Laciel even more closely than before.'*

"Laciel can take care of herself!" I snapped, in no
mood to hear nonsense like that. "And you people are
overlooking something. Anyone sadistic enough to kill a
world full of people, just to get back at one man, isn't
likely to make things easy fop his enemies even when
they're hoplessly trapped. I was nasty enough to ruin his
efforts to stop us for a while, so what better way to say
thank you than to make me a present for an absolute
dictator? It does not necessarily mean there's a hidden way
off this world, or that we'll find it even if there is one.
Depending on a hope tike that could make your ultimate
disappointment unspeakably horrible."

None of them had an immediate answer to that, and it
wasn't so absolutely pitch dark that I couldn't see all their
faces turned toward me. For a moment there was nothing
but the sound of the wind and a creak of leather as one or
two of the horses shifted in place, and then Rikkan Addis
sighed.

"I have the feeling you've been disappointed in quite a
few hopes in your life," he said, speaking to me but
somehow also addressing the others. "That son of experi-
ence tends to turn people cynical and unwilling to extend
their trust, but the hope of getting out of here can't hurt us.

214

SHARON GREEN

not now while there's still a chance of it. If the time ever
comes when that chance is completely dead, that's when
we can talk about giving up; right now we have too many
other things to do. We'll keep moving as long as we can,
stop for a rest when we have to, then go on again. Our
first order of business is getting to that gate."

The others all drew themselves up in silent agreement,
then followed along with heavy determination when Su led
off, finding warm hope much more appealing than cold
reality. I let my gray move along with the other horses
without adding anything, not blaming anyone for choosing
the warm over the cold, but finding it impossible to share
their hope. I'd do everything I could to make that hope
into a reality, but when the time came that it died com-
pletely, I was not going to be one of the mourners at its
funeral.

We moved on again into the chill of the night, staying
close enough to the road for Su to see the trail, but this
time not riding immediately beside it as we had earlier.
Not knowing exactly how far ahead of us the city of Nor
was—or what kind of patrols they sent out—meant it
would have been silly to take chances, so we didn't. It
might have helped if there had been cover of some sort to
ride through, but even the thin, scraggly woods we'd
found when first coming through to that world didn't
repeat itself.

Not long after we started a second road came from the
left to join the one we were following, and after that the
thing was wider if not in any better shape. We also became
aware of the fact that the land stretching out around us
seemed more regular than simply even, farmland rather
than grassland. We all peered through me dark. trying to
make out houses or barns or something, and because of
that almost missed it when Su angled away from the road
and even farther right than we were riding. She moved out
a bit ahead of us, stopped her horse and stood up in her
stirrups, then turned to look around at us when we pulled
up beside her.

"The trail took a real sharp turn this way, and I can't
see it going back again," she told us, a faint excitement
under her ever-present calm. "Don't remember it ever

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

215

doing something like that before, except when it was near
a gate. Can't see it stopping any time soon, though, so
maybe this is different. You want to scout ahead?"

"No," Rikkan Addis answered, knowing she was talk-
ing to him. "If we find we are approaching the gate I can
always change my mind, but for now we'll continue to
stay together."

Su nodded and led off again, and in a short while we
discovered we were riding between two cultivated fields.
There were still no farmhouses that we could see, but
something barnlike loomed large and dark far to our left.
The trail went between the fields and then angled to the
left again once we were beyond them, and the excitement
of Su's discovery died of old age. If the turn had meant we
were near the gate, we would have found it as quickly as
we had the previous ones.

Time has a way of stretching on and on under circum-
stances like that, making you believe you've been riding
all night instead of for less than half of it- I didn't know
about the others but I was tired and cold, and once,
without thinking, I spoke a spell that should have created a
warm jacket for me to put on. When nothing happened 1
told myself it had been a necessary experiment, making
certain that I wasn't simply blind on that world but really
incapable of doing magic, men tried to forget about it.
After trying for several minutes I discovered I was too cold
to forget, but that cold did nothing to stop the brooding.

It wasn't possible for any of us to have anything like
real, true appetites, or I should say it wasn't possible for
those of us who were civilized, sensitive individuals. Some
people make a career out of thinking about their stomachs,
and often insist on everyone else joining them just so
they'll have the company. At one point Rikkan Addis
spoke quietly to Su, left his place beside Dranna to drop
back next to Kadrim and give the big redhead his reins,
^    then slipped out of his saddle. The dark swallowed him up
almost instantly, but we didn't stop and wait for him. We
just kept going as if he'd simply stepped out of a room we
were all sitting in, and would be back in a minute or two
-Jy   to rejoin the conversation. Since no one else was taking
notice I didn't either, but I couldn't help wondering if we

216 SJ1ARON GREEN

were rid of him for good—and if we were, why he had
chosen such a strange time and way to leave.

It turned out, of course, that he'd left us only long
enough to go hunting, using what was probably the only
way of doing that in the dark. About twenty minutes later
we caught sight of a darker shadow ahead of us, which
turned out to be fearless leader with a pile of dead rabbits
at his feet- He might not have been able to catch rabbits,in
the dark, but his link-shape certainly didn't have the same
limitations. With supper in the offing it was time for a rest
stop, and even if we didn't need it, the horses did.

It didn't take long before we were divided into two
groups, those of us who had been raised to the outdoors
and therefore knew what they were doing, and those of us
who were city-bred and therefore capable of no more than
standing and watching. If it had been necessary to feed our
group amid the stone and brick and wood of a cold,
soulless city with all provisions locked away behind heavy
doors, Zail, Dranna and I would have had very little
trouble doing it. Out there in the wild, though, where food
still moved around under its own power, the provisioning
and preparation of it became the job of the other three.
Three shielded fires were quickly built, the" rabbits were
skinned and put on improvised spits, and before long the
smell of cooking meal was being tossed around by the
wind. Dranna and 1 joined Su at her fire while Zail divided
his time and comments between Rik and Kadrim, and the
best thing to be said about the time was that the fires at
least made the stop worthwhile-
When the food was ready we ate it, and it turned out to
be a good deal better than half of us had expected it to be.
It wasn't the sort of meal you'd ask your cook to prepare
for you on a regular basis, but it brought a little warmth
back to our bodies, and there was even enough left over to
be put in our saddlebags for the next meal. It bothered
Dranna and, to a lesser extent Zail, that it wasn't wrapped
in any way, but I wouldn't have thought about it if those
two hadn't mentioned it. My years with Morgiana had
dimmed the past to a certain extent, but nothing would
ever erase it completely -

Once the fires were out we were on our way again, and

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER       217

in a couple of hours were able to see why the trail kept
curving right, away from the road we'd been on originally.
The land to our left had all been cultivated, but slowly the
fields gave way to dark shapes and shadows that rose
higher in the distance, smaller dwellings thai stood not far
from a city. There was light in that city in a number of
places, but we were too far away to use that light to see
anything-

We needed most of the rest of that night to circle the
city, something that following the trail of the stone let-us
do without much difficulty. The city seemed to be large
and sprawling and entirely unwalled, which said some-
thing about the attitudes of its inhabitants. If there had
been any chance of revolution or other danger to their
upper-class necks, they would certainly be living behind
high walls of stone. The absence of a wallineant most if
not all of the people of that area thought the same as the
people we'd talked to, an idea that was extremely depress-
ing. A world like that would be horrible for anyone to live
in, but for us it would be ten times worse.

And then it came to me to wonder why, if the enemy
was on such cozy terms with the god-king, the trail ran at
a safe distance around the city, but ! didn't ask it aloud.
One possible answer was that the'balance stone had been
taken through that world and off it before any contact with
the god-king was made, but an answer like that would
support Rik's theory that there realty was a way out that
only had to be found. There was a way out, the mere fact
that the enemy was no longer there proved that, but it
wasn't proof of our own ability to use it. If someone had
opened the gate from the other side, the enemy would have
been able to use it; there was nothing to say that opening it
from this side was possible, and unlike Rik, I didn't
believe in giving people false hope.

By the time the sun came up we were on the opposite
side of the city with more cultivated fields between it and
us, not to mention the pasturage to be seen on the far side
of the road. The light also showed us the large bams
standing one to each two sections of land, brown and gray
structures meant only for the use of the land or the ani-
mals, not in any manner for the use of people. The work-

218

SHARON GREEN

ers undoubtedly had to walk out to the fields every morning
and back to the city every night, which was not very
pleasant for the workers but perfect for keeping constant
track of them. To let them sleep closer to where they
worked would have taken them out of reach and out from
under constant surveillance, and when you don't watch
people constantly they sometimes develop strange ideas. I
rode along hugging myself around against the chill that
had long since crept inside me, almost to the point of
wishing we would find it impossible to leave that world. If
we stayed we might not live very long, but while we did
the rulers of that place would know we were there.

"Rik, I'm going to have to rest soon," Dranna's voice
came suddenly, loud in the silence it had broken, but
otherwise low and nearly strengthless. I looked over to see
that the small woman beside me was trembling from cold
and fatigue, her face pale and her hands visibly unsteady. I
wasn't doing all that well myself after riding all night, but
Dranna seemed close to dropping from exhaustion.

"Just hang on until we get to those woods up ahead,"
fearless leader told her, dropping back from Su's side to
ride between the small woman and myself. "We all need
to rest a while, but there's no cover here to do it. People
will be coming out to work those fields, and you know that
if they see us they'll report us. Just a few minutes more of
riding, and then you'll be able to rest.'*

He reached over to put his hand on one of hers with a
smile, a comforting gesture 1 was sure she appreciated,
considenng the way she felt about him. Her answering
smile was weak because of her weariness, but she still
found it possible to straighten in the saddle and draw her
hand away from his, probably to show the man that he
didn't have to worry about her. I hadn't thought Dranna
the sort of woman who would do that kind of chin-up
thing, but apparently I'd been mistaken.

It seemed to take forever before we reached the stand of
trees, and then we had to get deep enough into it that the
horses would be hidden from view. When we finally found
an area with enough bushes for cover, 1 half expected it to
disappear in a puff of smoke as soon as we dismounted,
proving it was nothing but imagination or illusion. We all

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        219

made it down to the ground, though, and the bushes were
still there, but fearless leader looked arounc' at them as if
he knew they were thinking about disappearing.

"This is closer to the road than I like being, but I
suppose we have no choice," he said, running one hand
through his hair. "We have to rest, and we have to hide
the horses white we do it. Kadnm, you take first watch,
then wake me for the second. I'll wake you, Zail, and if
we need a fourth watch, Su will take it. 1 hate leaving the
horses saddled, but that's something else we have no
choice about. We might need to move out of here in a
hurry."

"Wouldn't worry too much about being close to me
road," Su told him. stretching wide and hard. "The trail
brought us this way, like it means to go back and join the
road again. Better if we don't get too far from the trail."

"I think I'll have to agree with that," Rik told her, but
not very enthusiastically. "If we lose the trail we have
trouble, probably more than anything the road will bring,
but that doesn't mean we can forget about everything else.
Whoever happens to be on watch had better move around
during his or her time, just to make sure they don't fall
asleep. Okay, Kadrim, it's all yours now."

"And if it becomes necessary, I'll take the watch after
Su's," I put in just as everyone began moving in different
directions, looking for their own piece of ground. "Don't
forget to wake me, Su."

With everyone stopped it was my turn to move away,
fairly well satisfied with my announcement and the way
I'd made it. Fearless leader had deliberately left me out of
his arrangements for guard watch, but I'd just as deliber-
ately put myself back in them. The only other one who
hadn't been included was Dranna, but considenng the fact
that she was already asleep on the ground, she didn't
count. I hadn't been asked if I wanted to be left out, so /
hadn't asked before inviting myself back in.

"If a watch after Su's becomes necessary, Kadrim will
take it," I heard behind me, an acknowledgment of what
I'd said I hadn't been expecting. "How many watches we
stand will depend on how long each watcher can stay
awake alone, and just how much sleep we need before we

220 SHARON GREEN

can move on again. It also doesn't make much sense
having someone stand guard who's unarmed. If we're
attacked, we need someone to fight back who's wide
awake, giving the sleepers a chance to drag themselves out
of the fog. Simply yelling for help doesn't serve the same
purpose."

I turned back at once intending to argue what he'd said,
but this time I was the only one, aside from Kadrim.iwho
was still standing. The others were down on the grass and
stretching out wearily, already ignoring a subject which
had been closed. The redheaded boy-man looked at me
with sympathy, but the look also showed complete agree-
ment with what had been decided. I was unarmed and
without magic, a total noncombatant, someone who needed
to be protected rather than someone who could help pro-
tect everyone else. I hated being treated like that, hated the
very thought of it, but no matter how much I wanted to, I
couldn't force them to risk their lives to prove it wrong.

Three more steps brought me to the piece of ground I'd
chosen, and when I'd lain down I moved my gaze to the
trunk of a nearby tree. I stared at it and stared at it for a
least a minute, but at the end of that time 1 was still able to
see nothing more than peeling brown bark. I hadn't known
how flat and shallow the world was without the Sight, how
vague and uninteresting everything would look. It was like
being locked in a small cage lined with thick cotton pad-
ding, enough to keep you from reaching any part of the
real world, not enough to become something that could be
fought against. It was stifling and horribly confining, but it
didn't mean 1 was entirely useless and helpless. I may
have been without magic but I wasn't helpless, and as
soon as the opportunity arose, I would prove that to all of
them.

I didn't realize I'd fallen asleep until I woke again,
curled up on my right side with my face on my arm.'I was
warmer than I'd been during the night but not that much
warmer, which had led me to believe at first that I was
waking up in some abandoned warehouse, the rest of the
pack not far from me. Instead it was the group who
weren't far from me, and not all of them were awake.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        221

I stretched the painful stiffness out of my arm as I sat
up, then went to work on the matching stiffness in my
neck. It was hard teliing how long I'd slept, but the middle
of the day seemed already to have passed, something the
sky above the trees refused to confirm. The clouds of the
day before were back again, and although they were fairly
high up they didn't seem close to breaking up and blowing
away. Their almost constant presence made that world
seem even flatter and duller than losing the Sight would
account for, and 1 was getting very tired of looking at it.

"Come and have something to eat with us," Zail said in
a very low voice as he crouched next to me, his sympa-
thetic gray eyes showing that he'd also had to go through
destiffening when he'd awakened. "We'll be waking Dranna
and Su in a little while, and then we'll be moving on."

If he'd been inviting me to socialize I would have
refused, but with two people still sleeping there would be
"nothing in the way of chitchat to ignore, and the idea of
food sounded good. I moved myself to my feet without
looking at him, stretched my way over to the saddlebags,
then helped myself to some rabbit without paying any
more attention to the other two men than 1 had to Zail.
Fearless leader had been the one who had refused to let me
stand a watch, but Zail and Kadrim had made no effort to
get him to change his mind. It hadn't been hard to decide
that if they agreed with him so completely, the least I
could do was accord them the same treatment I was giving
him. I took my rabbit and sat down with my back to the
three to eat it. and somewhere behind me someone sighed.
I didn't know which one of them it was, but it really didn't
matter.

Dranna was the first one to be awakened, and from
Kadrim's whispered explanation to her I gathered that Su
had stood a very long watch and was therefore going to be
allowed to sleep a little while longer. Dranna had some
difficulty getting herself unwound from where she'd slept,
but I couldn't help noticing how comfortable Su looked, as
though she were stretched out on the softest of beds rather
than on stiff grass covering very hard ground. I'd spent a
lot of years sleeping on hard, uncomfortable surfaces, and
looking at Su reminded me of the trouble I'd had the first

SHARON GREEN

222

nights in Morgiana's house. A soft bed isn't a luxury when
that isn't at atl what you're used to, and I remembered
how surprised Morgiana had been when she'd walked in
one night to find me curled up on the nig in front of the
Fireplace in my room. It had taken me time to get used to
using the fine bed I'd been given, and I wondered with a
faint smile if Su had used the bed I'd created for her
along with her pavilion. If we ever did get out of there to a
place I could use magic again, I'd have to remember to ask
her what she preferred in the way of sleeping accommoda-
tions.

Dranna was mostly moving freely again and was already
eating some of the rabbit, when Zail came quickly back
into our bushes from wherever he had gone, gesturing
toward us unmistakably to keep quiet. Rik got immediately
to his feet and Kadrim put a hand on Dranna's shoulder,
but straining my ears didn't bring me any sounds I hadn't
been hearing before. Zail gestured over his shoulder as he
moved soundlessly to Su's side to wake her, and then the
noise began coming to us, the noise of hoofbeats mixed
with voices. The voices appeared to be enjoying them-
selves and the hoofbeats were taking their time, and when
i looked around at our group again there were four swords
in four fists, the weapons having been drawn soundlessly.
Su had gone from sleep to full wakefulness almost instan-
taneously, doing a good job destroying one of the excuses
Rik had given me, and then we were all crowding around
Zail.

' 'It's a group of riders, probably members of that Sacred
Guard from the looks of them," Zail whispered low,
mainly to fearless leader. "Coming up the road, most
likely heading for the city we just passed. Considering the
number of blades involved, we might be better off not
mixing it up with them."

"If the choice stays ours, I'll keep that in mind," Rik
murmured, and then he glanced around at me rest-of us.
"Everyone get mounted as quietly as you can, and once in
the saddle stay low. If they just keep going, we'll move
out as soon as they're out of sight, but if our luck turns
bad we'll have to be ready. In case of a fight, Zail,
Kadrim and 1 will hold them off, Su, while you run as fast

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        223

as you can with Dranna and LacieL You'll be following
the trail and once we break free we'll be following you, so
make sure you leave some sign. You'll also have to take
care of the girls if you run into any more of these, but
we'll be along as fast as we can so it shouldn't be for too
long. Okay, everybody to their horses."

No one stopped to ask for clarification, to put questions,
or to lodge objections, which was to be expected consider-
ing how close the sounds on the road had grown. I went to
my horse with the others, just as silent as they, but hardly
with the same intention; Rikkan Addis had excluded me
once, but if he thought he was going to do it again, he was
crazy. Su could look after Dranna, who was pale and
seemed to be very frightened; the other one of "the girls"
didn't need to be looked after.

Although the horses had spent our rest time saddled,
they'd also eaten and slept and now seemed ready to get
on with the journey. We discovered, however, that they
were a little too ready; they began dancing as soon as we
were in our saddles, eager to be off and thinking we were
the same- Most of us were able to hold them reasonably
still but Dranna, distracted by nervousness, was a shade
too slow with reins and knees. "Until then we'd been very
glad to have strong, high-spirited mounts under us; as soon
as the shouts came, telling us we hadn't been iucky enough
to have the movement of a white horse in the middle of
greenery go unnoticed, the gladness began evaporating.

"We don't want to be caught in here," Rikkan Addis
-said quickly when it was certain we'd been discovered, his
sword back in his hand. "Everybody out before we're
surrounded, and don't forget what you're supposed to
do."

With that he let his roan surge forward, and once we
had charged through the screen of bushes, he and the other
two men wheeled left to ride at the mounted force coming
at us from the road, while Su and Dranna took off right at
fall speed, angling for another pan of the road. If bad luck
had gotten us noticed in the bushes, good hick had seen to
it that most of the riders had already gone past our position
when it had happened. Su and Dranna had a clear road,
and they lost no time taking it.

SHARON GREEN

224

1 turned to look at the natives who had discovered us,
and foundlhem considerably different from the ones we'd
spoken to the night before. There seemed to be about a
dozen of them or more, and each one was twice the size of
the small, nervous man, welt-fed and well-fleshed, some
bearded, all wearing brown and gray uniforms, brown
boots, and swordbelts. They shouted in surprise when they
found themselves being attacked, two of them going down
with their swords only half drawn, the snarls on their faces
showing their affront. They'd probably thought we were
some of the small, helpless people, easy targets for riding
over even without weapons, but they were quickly learning
better. Even so there were only three men coming at them,
which made them very eager to wet their blades.

Fd had enough time to consider what I would do, and
the first requirement was to find something to fight with.
A nearby tree provided that in the form of a dead branch,
long enough and heavy enough to do what I needed it to,
and it didn't take long breaking it free. I turned with it in
my hand to discover that two of the big natives had
worked their way behind Kadrim and Zail, and weren't far
from putting their blades in their backs. My gray needed
very little urging to get me over there at top speed, and
then 1 was swinging away, getting one of them in the head
and the other in the shoulder. The first went down without
a sound, either unconscious or dead, but the second yelled,
his sword gone and his shoulder probably broken, and then
he was down, too, a crack in the face quieting him immedi-
ately. The heavy branch in my hand had vibrated every
time I'd struck, and the feeling of exhilaration was incredi-
ble. So much for helplessness, and so much for running.

By that time everyone knew i was there, my three quest
companions as well as me natives. Rikkan Addis had
begun cursing furiously as h?. fought, and for some reason
Zail and Kadrim seemed Justus angry- It hadn't occurred
to me that those two would think I was trying to steal their
thunder, but I didn't have the time to worry about it. After
gaping at me incredulously for a moment, some of the
natives stopped trying to reach the men and were yanking
their horses around, heading toward me.

The next few minutes were more than brisk, but that's

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        225

not to say they weren't enjoyable. The first two to reach
me made the acquaintance of my branch, and although
they didn't go down i was sure I could hear the sound of
bones breaking. My gray danced and snapped at the smaller
horses being ridden by the natives, frightening the poor
beasts into backing off with squeals, and I kept my branch
hard on the move, making the riders shy about coming too
close to it. All in all it was a lot of fun, but it did seem to
be nearing the time we should have been getting out of
there. I glanced over toward my three companions, seeing
that they were engaged and still outnumbered but easily
holding their own, and then—

"Got her!" a voice came from directly behind me, just
before two oversized arms closed around me. My gray
half-reared at the feel of the extra weight on his back, but
it was too late to unseat the native who had jumped onto
my horse behind me. My right arm was pulled down and
held close to my body like the left, and then other hands
were on the branch and forcing it out of my grip. i struggled
furiously, kicking and trying to pull loose, but die one
behind me wasn't alone, and suddenly there was a strip of
leather being tied tight around my wrists. I shrieked with
rage and tried to keep it from happening, but it was already
too late and then I was being lifted and pulled from my
saddle onto the mount of one of the natives, my struggling
either endured or ignored- I hadn't expected them to do
that, not in the middle of a fight, and then it became
much, much worse.

The one holding me turned his horse and, surrounded by
at least four of his friends, began riding at top speed
directly toward the city we'd skirted so carefully the night
before.

CHAPTER 8

We rode slowly past small but solid-looking houses as we
entered the city, and most of the people on the streets
turned to stare at my grinning, joking escort, their expres-
sions a mixture I didn't care to analyze too closely. Some       ^
of the people walking wore uniforms like those of the men
who had captured me. mostly brown trimmed with gray,
plus gray insignia of some sort, but others wore outfits that
were more one-piece suits than uniforms, the gray showing
up in them to a greater extent and not just as trim. The
men in suits were deferred to by the small, quiet people,
the ones who were barefoot and wearing no more than       ,•
strips of brown cloth. The houses and buildings behind
them all were neat and looked well-kept, but they were as
dull and drab as the brown-haired, brown-eyed people
themselves.

For the hundredth time I tried moving my wrists in the
leather holding mem together, but there was as tittle give
in the strip as there was hope inside of me. I'd completely        |
forgotten what those people had said about me being prom-       ^
ised to their god-king, and I'd finally gotten depressed
enough to admit that joining the fight and giving them the
chance to capture me was probably the stupidest thing I'd
ever done in my entire life. For someone who'd set out to
prove she wasn't helpless, I'd certainly done a bang-up
job.                                                         -?<,

The man I rode in front of tightened his arm around my        '^

226                                  ¥^,;

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        227

waist as I shifted on the saddle, making sure I wouldn't go
far if 1 tried to throw myself off his horse again- He hadn't
hurl me in any way, even when I'd been kicking his legs
black and blue, but he also hadn't let me get away from
him. He and his friends had begun laughing almost hyster-
ically since we'd left the woods, congratulating themselves
on their fantastically good fortune, which led me to believe
they were in line for a reward quite a bit more substantial
than what had been promised to the small, frightened
people. The man who held me had almost killed his horse
by making it gallop while carrying double, and it hadn't
bothered him in the least. Either horses were cheap and
easy to come by to someone of his station, or he was
anticipating being soon able to buy as many horses as he
wanted or needed.

We were only moving at a walk, but that was fast
enough to take us from small buildings to larger ones to
big, tail, sprawling ones in just a few minutes. The people
walking and riding in that part of the city had even more
gray in me color scheme of their clothing, and just when I
thought there weren't any such things as women who
weren't small and obvious servants, I began seeing a few.
They wore long, loose dresses^with thin veils over their
faces and none of them was without escort, but they were
there and real and they also took their turn staring at me. I
kept telling myself I didn't know why they were all doing
so much staring, but unfortunately for my peace of mind, I
didn't believe myself for a minute.

We threaded our way through the city without stopping
even once, up narrow streets and alleys, down wider ave-
nues, past shops and houses and taverns and stables, around
wells and fountains. It took quite a while before I lost
track of the turns, but eventually the riding around and
about, twisting and turning, overcame my ability to follow
mem and remember. I wondered if the men had been
trying to confuse me on purpose, and then we rounded a
test turn and I understood that confusing me had nothing to
do with the route they'd chosen. At the end of the widest
avenue I'd seen yet stood the guarded entrance of a palace
of light gray stone blocks, a palace whose walls stretched

228 SHARON GREEN

away into the distance, the place we'd obviously been
heading for all along. My escort had wanted to get there as
soon as possible, so they'd taken the shortest backstreet
route they'd known.

"Starting that kicking and fussing all over again won't
get you any more than tired, girl," the man behind me
said, his accent as thick as that of the man from the night
before, but in some way slightly different. "We were told
you don't tike the idea of being given to the god-king and
would run away from the honor if you could, but none of
us is going to let that happen. You belong to Thannar now,
blessed be his name, and that's the way it's going to
stay."

The others came in as an automatic echo to the blessed-be
part, just like the small people the night before, and that
made me more upset and frantic than I had been. Those
men weren't simply looking forward to a reward, they
were eagerly bringing their god-king something he very
much wanted, and part of their reward was the fact that
they were the ones doing it. If everyone in that palace felt
the same I'd never escape, not unless the impossible hap-
pened and I regained the Sight. Right then I felt the loss of
magic more than I'd thought I ever would, finally begin-
ning to understand just how important it was to my life.
I'd always considered it something I did simply because
Morgiana wanted me to, and because I did it well; after all
those years I was learning there was more to magic than
just doing it, and the revelation was a very unsettling one.

The guards at the palace entrance did no more than stare
as they stepped aside, so it was no more than another
couple of minutes before we stopped in the middle of a
wide stone courtyard and my escort began dismounting.
Ignoring the advice of the man who was holding me I'd
been struggling anyway, which accomplished bringing over
two of the other men to pull me to my feet and hold me
instead of just one. As soon as the man who had been
holding me dismounted he took over possession of my
right arm, and he and the second man dragged me between
them, through wide wooden doors and into the palace
proper.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        229

If I'd been expecting to find the brightening of color in
the palace, 1 would have been disappointed. Gray stone
walls, floor and ceiling, brown wooden tables, dark paint-
ings, dark sculpture, dull silver weapons, even dark wall
hangings, in the few places there were any. The corridors
and halls were wide, high and cold, the people either
creeping along if they were servants or moving quietly if
they were of higher class, and no one anywhere seemed
capable of normal laughter. Even my escort had com-
pletely sobered, and at one point I wondered briefly if
people could have been staring at me because of what 1
was wearing. My rose-colored shirt and gold trousers
weren't exactly bright and fresh, but they were a far cry
from brown and gray.

Our walk through the palace seemed to have as many
turns and twists as our ride through the city, but eventually
we got where we were going. A dark door of carved wood
had two guards standing in front of it, and as we ap-
proached one of the guards knocked and entered. He was
out again and off somewhere even before we reached it, so
the second guard had to be the one to open it again for us.
Inside was a man wearing quite a lot of gray over his
pudgy body, a man who was snort but not as short as the
small servant people. He sat behind a thin-legged table in
the large, cold room, a table he seemed to be using as a
desk, and once I'd been pulled through the doorway he
rose and walked around to the front of the table to study
me.

"Excellent," he said with a faint smile as he looked up
at me, his dark eyes bright with pleasure. "There can be
no doubt that this is the female meant as a gift for our
beloved god-king, the one he has been expecting. The
reports of her arrival were true after all, and soon he will
make her his."

"I'm a human being, not a gift, and I don't belong to
anyone but myself," I said, looking down coldly at the
overweight man. "Tell these idiots to let me go, and show
me the way out of this place. I have things to do, and you
imbeciles are wasting my time."

"1 can see you have much to leam about your new

SHARON GREEN

230

place," he told me, the gleam in his eyes shifting to one of
anticipation. "Our god-king will find a great deal of plea-
sure in teaching you those lessons, and once he has begun
you'll see the necessity in teaming them quickly. What
you were allowed with the god-king who sent you will not
be allowed here."

The short man stepped back then, dismissing me com-
pletely from consideration, and looked at my escort with a
warm, full smile of approval.

"You men will be more than commended for your work
this day," he said, his tone causing them to straighten with
pride and pleasure. "The god-king himself will give you
his blessing when he gives you your reward, and your
names will be entered in the Registry of the Ages, as those
who gave invaluable assistance to our beloved leader. You
will also, of course, now be allowed to choose females of
your own, who will bear you sons to carry on your names,
rather than to simply continue producing sons of the god-
king whom you are forbidden to know. You will establish
Families, very minor ones but Families nonetheless, and
not until the third generation will those Families need to be
reestablished. You should be well-pleased with what you've
earned."

The five men were more than we)! pleased, their shining
eyes totally unaware of the disgust 1 was feeling. It's not
hard to know a culture by what rewards it gives its people,
and on that scale of measurement their culture sickened
me. The small servant-people weren't the only ones being
oppressed, and for the life of me 1 couldn't understand
why they all put up with it.

"Ah, here are the House guards," the short man said,
gesturing to the door behind us which still stood open. A
group of newcomers in uniform had appeared there, and
they looked at my escort with undisguised envy. "They'll
take the female now, while I take your names for my
records."

The two men holding my arms gave me up without a
murmur to two of the newcomers, and the last 1 saw of the
five was the way they crowded around the short man's
desk, waiting for him to reseat himself. My new escort

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

consisted of four, and they took me in a direction away
from the one we'd used coming in- Their attitudes were
even more impersonal than those of my first escort, and I
couldn't keep from feeling even more depressed.

After only a few minutes of walking, we turned a comer
to see a wide corridor that led nowhere but to a plain, very
heavy wooden door that had metal bars in a small square
about two-thirds of the way up it—and a wide metal bar
locking it closed. In front of it stood four guards, big men
who looked as if they could use the swords they were
wearing, and with no other door or corridor in sight, the
door they were guarding had to be where we were going.
It didn't take much to see that if they got me behind that
door I'd really be trapped, and the panic that rose up in me
gave me even more strength than I normally had. Without
warning I twisted hard against the hands holding my arms,
using surprise to break me loose, then turned and shoul-
dered between the shocked pair of men walking behind,
knocking them aside. With the corridor behind suddenly
wide open I took off like an arrow, running faster than I
ever had in my life.

I hadn't known running with your hands tied could be so
hard, but I couldn't let that stow me any more than I couid
let myself hear the pounding of feet'behmd me- Doors and
corridor walls flashed past in a blur, some with small,
brown-clad figures huddled uncertainly in front of them,
and then 1 nearly went down when I charged around one
comer right into a man in a suit. The man, smaller than
me, went flying to the right from the sudden collision, but
although he hadn't stopped me he had slowed me enough.
I was able to take no more than another four steps before
hands closed on my arms again, big hands that weren't
going to let me pull loose a second time. I screamed in
rage and swung my bound arms around and kicked, but
even the strength still being pumped all through my body
couldn't help me again. They lifted me off my feet in grips
I couldn't break, and this time I was carried where they
wanted me to go: up to the door, through it, and inside.

By the time they put me back on my feet, my heart was
no longer pounding. 1 was still sweating from the run and

232 SHARON GREEN

my breathing wasn't exactly even, but the surge that had
come from the thought of escaping was long gone, buried
under the bitter realization that I'd been kidding myself.
Even if I hadn't collided with that man I wouldn't have
made it out of the palace, not with pursuers only a few
steps behind me and guards all over the place ahead. I
hadn't wanted to admit that I really was trapped there,
permanently caught because of my own stupidity. I de-
served whatever they did to me—and the worst part of that
was that 1 didn't know what the whatever would turn out
to be.

"Ah, that's her, of course," a voice said, making me
look up to see the thin man who had come out from behind
a hanging of gray, two bigger men following along behind
him. We now stood in the room behind the heavy wooden
door, an area of about ten feet by ten feet that was
completely bare except for the gray hanging on the wall
opposite the door.

"Yes, that's her," one of my escort agreed, his voice
the least bit unsteady. "She tried to run, but we caught her
without any trouble."

"Fortunately for you," the thin man said, the look in
his dark eyes making the guard beside me pale "So she's
a runner, is she? Well, she won't find anywhere to run in
here. You four may leave now."

The men nearly stumbled over their own feet getting out
of there, and although 1 wasn't in the mood to sympathize
with them, I knew exactly how they felt. If I could have
walked back out of that door the relief would have been
indescribable, but all I could do was stand there and hear it
closed and locked behind me.

"Well, we can dispense with that now, can't we?" the
thin man said, coming over to begin untying the leather
strip on my wrists. His long-fingered hands worked quickly,
and when the leather was off he stepped back to coil it,
staring at me thoughtfully. "I couldn't quite believe any
female would be foolish enough to try to escape the ulti-
mate honor, but I can see from your expression that it's
true," he said, his voice cold and disapproving. "You'll
soon have that nonsense knocked out of you, of course,

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

233

and that stubborn, insolent look in your eyes as well.
Follow me, now, and no more foolishness from you."

He turned and walked back toward the gray hanging, the
two men behind him stepping aside to let him by, but all 1
did was stand there rubbing at my wooden wrists. I'd been
tied so long I could barely feel them or my hands, but not
so long that the numbness had affected my mind. I didn't
know what lay behind the hanging, and had absolutely no
interest in finding out, and when the man glanced back
over his shoulder, he got the message immediately -

"How annoying you are'" he complained as he stopped,
his chin rising indignantly. "How I wish the god-king had
the time to take you in hand at once! Bring her!"

The order was directed to the two men who had stepped
aside for him, men who were wearing uniforms rather than
the suit he had on. Their uniforms weren't precisely like
me uniforms of the men who were members of the Sacred
Guard, but even with the extra gray they were still uni-
forms. As the two men came to take my arms I tried to
resist, but after an unbelievably short scuffle ! found my-
self being forced through the hanging, following after the
thin man who led the way with a good deal of satisfaction.

Directly behind the hanging-was a very large room that
seemed to be round and was torch-lit to the point of
brightness, and this time I couldn't help returning the
stares 1 was getting. A thick, soft cloth of gray covered
most of the floor, and on that cloth sat dozens of dark-
haired, dark-eyed women, very beautiful, very shapely
women who were combing each others' hair, helping each
other exercise, or simply sitting and holding low conversa-
tions. They all slopped what they were doing to stare when
I was brought into the room, and my return stare was more
distraught than curious; except for one woman being draped
in clingy gray cloth by three small servant women, every
one of them was naked.

"This, of course, is the place the god-king's favorites
are kept," the thin man said over his shoulder to me, his
tone now smug. "You'll find that I'm in complete charge,
subject only to the god-king himself. If punishment should
be ordered for you, I'm the one who will see it carried
out."

SHARON GREEN

234

The women were all absolutely silent as I was taken
across the floor, many of them looking very frightened at
the mention of punishment, and then the thin man stopped
in front of one of a series of narrow oval openings, and
gestured toward it as I was brought to a halt in front of
him.

"For your impertinence and disobedience, you'll be
kept in here until the god-king sends for you," I was (old,
the words cold but very satisfied. "If you want to be
allowed the company of other females, you'll have to earn
the privilege."

At his gesture I was bent and thrust through the open-
ing, hard enough to land me on all fours on the gray cloth
the tiny room was carpeted with. I twisted around in time
to see the metal grating, but not soon enough to keep it
from being closed across the narrow, oval opening. I was
locked in, and then 1 was left alone.

1 looked around at the narrow, low-ceilinged alcove
from where I now sat, seeing plain stone walls without
opening or lamp, then simply lay down on the floor on my
left side. I would have been grateful for having been left
my clothes, but I knew well enough that that particular
circumstance was subject to change at any moment. I was
horribly upset and horribly confused, but it had finally
come through to me that Kadnm had been right about my
strength compared to a man's. I'd tried over and over
again to get free but I hadn't been strong enough to do it,
and I simply didn't understand why that was so. If I wasn't
strong enough, and even a stranger tike Kadrim knew I
wouldn't be, why hadn't / known it? Why had I continued
to believe it was only a matter of tiredness? 1 was so
confused I could barely think—and I was something else
as well.

I drew my knees up closer to my chest and closed my
eyes, determined not to show anyone how I felt, but
finding it impossible not to admit it to myself. I was more
afraid than I'd been since I was very, very small, and alt I
wanted to do was hide in a comer and tremble. Those
horrible people had captured me and now I would never
get away, nor would I be able to help the people of my

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

235

world or even my quest companions. I had no help to give
on that world, not to myself or to anyone else, and now we
six were really trapped there forever. My part of it would
be worse than theirs, but 1 couldn't say I hadn't earned it,
that 1 hadn't stepped forward and demanded it in ringing
tones. I had asked for it, and now 1 was going to get it.

When I was very small, I'd come to believe that nothing
in the dark could hurt me if 1 lay very still and didn't make
a sound of any sort- It wasn't really dark in that tiny
alcove, but I tried it anyway.

"D'leljohr!" I spat at the thin man, wishing with every
ounce of strength 1 had that the spell would- work. but of
course it didn't, instead of shredding the man just stood
there rubbing his arm where I'd bitten him, glaring at me
where / stood, held between his two male assistants. I was
so furious 1 was trembling, but none of them were as calm
and cool as they'd been a little while earlier either.

"I have never seen a female so impossible!" the thin
man hissed, his skin flushed from the struggle- "Again
your hair is disarranged, but we no longer have the time to
see to it. We must go now, and the consequences will be
yours. Bring her!"          •'

He stalked off toward a different gray hanging than the
one I'd been brought through originally, and his two assis-
tants lost no time forcing me after him. The naked women
in the room stared at us silently as we passed them, but
this time they seemed more relieved than frightened.

As far as I'd been able to determine, about a day and a
half had passed since I'd first been brought there. No part
of the area seemed to contain a window, but I was fairly
sure it was the evening of the day after I'd been captured.
I'd slept undisturbed in the alcove for a long time, and
when I'd awakened the women in the outer room had been
asleep. A couple of hours later the small servant women
had entered bringing food, and that signaled the start of the
day. After eating the combing and exercising and chatting
began again, the only things those women seemed to do.

I spent the day refusing whatever was brought me in the
way of sustenance, and by the time the third meal was

.236             SHARON GREEN

finished the small serving women were rather upset. It was
then that two of the naked women opened the metal grat-
ing of the alcove and gestured me out, and they became
just as upset as the serving women when I did come out
but refused to let them near me. One had reached to my
clothes as though she intended taking them while the other
stood by with a comb, but I wasn't about to join their club.
I pushed them gently away from me and shook my head,
men wandered around the undecorated area trying to find
something interesting to look at.

About twenty minutes later the thin man showed up,
grew furious when the two women hurried over and whis-
pered something to him, then summoned his male assis-
tants. With a room that large it took the two of them a
while to catch me, and every time I kicked one the watch-
ing women gasped and moaned; but even though the men
didn't have all of it their way, they had enough. Despite
the way I fought I lost my clothes and boots, and then I
was held relatively still while my hair was combed. Even
through the furious embarrassment 1 felt, I was able to
wonder about their god-king's tastes, that a woman would
have her hair combed before being brought to him, but
would not be bathed. If I'd had any doubts about those
people that little item would have settled them, but I didn't
have doubts. All 1 knew was that I had to force them to
kill me as quickly as possible, preferably even before I
saw their god-king.

That, of course, was not the way it turned out. When
enough of the knots were out of my hair, two of the
servant women were gestured over to "dress" me. Two
wide. ankle-length panels of brown attached to a very
narrow band of soft material were fastened around my
hips, which left the outer sides of both of my thighs and
legs bare. When the naked women gasped I thought at first
it was sight of that offensive, humiliating "outfit" that
caused it, but then it suddenly came to me that it was the
color they were reacting to. All brown, without the least
touch of gray, was probably an insult, one, most likely, to
match the insult of my having tried to run away. To me the
color would have been fine if only there had been more of

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

237

it, but that hip-halter thing turned out not to be the worst
of it.

For the top of me, all I was given was a wide brown
necklace of wooden beads, a necklace barely long enough
or wide enough to cover anything at all. When the thin
man came forward with a smirk and put his hand up to
adjust the thing, my teeth reached his arm before his hand
reached the beads.

"Bring her faster!" the thin man hissed over his shoul-
der to the men hurrying me along, more upset than outrage
now in his voice. "If we arrive late, we'll lose more than
we already have!"

The men tightened their already-tight grips and increased
our pace along the narrow, featureless corridor, showing
less agitation than the man ahead of them, but apparently
feeling no less. The stone of the corridor floor was cold
and hard under my bare feet, but they wouldn't have cared
even if it was painful; they were all wearing boots, and I
wasn't the one they were worrying about. The beads around
my neck clacked with the pace the men forced on me, and
I hated the sound more than anything else I could think of.

The corridor turned to the left and we did too, and about
fifty feet ahead there was another heavy, barred door that
looked to be shut tight. The thin man reached it first and
said something through the small window, and by the time
we got there it was already swinging open. Outside was a
stone room with four guards and another man who wasn't
a guard, and that man gestured the thin man to him where
he stood peering out the side of yet another gray hanging.

"You're just in time," the man said to the thin man in a
very soft voice, looking tremblingly relieved. "He'll be
through in a minute, and then he wants her brought to him.
Before he ends the audience he's going to show her off,
and then he'll take her to his apartments. Why is she
dressed in that color?"

"The command came directly from him," the thin man
answered, still not over his upset. "The court will be very
impressed when they see him doing this to a gift from
another god-king, don't you think?"

"He did something like this to a captive about a hun-

238             SHARON GREEN

dred and fifty years ago." the other man said, looking
thoughtful. "The records of my predecessors make men-
tion of it, but it's hardly likely any members of the present
court know about it. Yes, they will be impressed, not that
he really needs to impress them. He just seems to enjoy
it."

The thin man nodded agreement as the other turned back
to the hanging to peek through it again, but I couldn't help
frowning at what they were taking so casually. A hundred
and fifty years ago? The man had been their god-king for
mat long or longer? From their comments it was clear their
own people didn't live that long, so why had their god-
king? Or, what was an even better question, what was their
god-king?

"That's it," the man said from the hanging, gesturing
to the ones who held me. "Take her out there now."

He and the thin man parted the hanging and held it out
of the way, and despite my struggles I was forced through
it. I felt very cold and sick to my stomach, and barely
noticed the very large, gray-trimmed room I was suddenly
in. There must have been more man a hundred people in
that room, all of them men, all of them dressed mostly in
gray, all of them on their knees, and all of them staring at
me- To the left of the hanging and about thirty yards away
was a raised platform, and on the very top step was a
throne of silver. Below the throne was a wide step almost
like a stage, and on that step stood a single figure, dressed
all in silver. I was able to see dark hair above an indistinct
face that was looking straight at me, and then 1 was being
forced to my knees and my head was pressed to the stone
of the floor.

Outrage has always come to me rather easily, and being
knelt in front of someone did it for me that time. When
they finally pulled me to my feet again I was more angry
than afraid, and strangely enough that seemed to frighten
me two men holding me. They dragged me along at what
was nearly a run, hauled me up the wide steps of the
platform, then thrust me forward toward the waiting figure
in silver. As soon as their hands were off me they dropped
to their knees, and quickly put their heads to the stone.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

239

I looked back at the man standing alone on the step of
the platform, tossed my head to get the hair back over my
shoulders, then folded my arms the way his were folded.
He was staring at me with a faint smile on his face, and
from that close I could see that his eyes were as silver as his
clothing and throne. He was tail and broad-shouldered and
lean, good-iooking if your tastes run that way, and certainly
didn'l appear to be a hundred and fifty years oid. A
horrified murmur had arisen from the men kneeling all
over the room, probably due to the lack of respect I was
showing their god-king, and all at once I had very high
hopes of being killed very quickly.

Which were dashed almost immediately when the man
unfolded his arms and began walking toward me, true
amusement reflected in his eyes. 1 wouldn't have given
him the satisfaction of backing away from him for any-
thing imaginable, but the closer he got the more the chill
returned, and suddenly I realized that my arms were no
longer folded but now held up in front of me in an effort to
cover myself.

"My, my, what very wide violet eyes you have," he
murmured as he stopped in front of me, looking down at
me with his own strange silver ones. Even held low his
voice was deep, and his accent was different from any of
the others I'd heard on thai world. "They're very pretty
eyes, and they seem to be afraid of me."

I tried to make myself tell him that I wasn't afraid of
him, but before the words could come out his right hand
flashed to my hair, and then all 1 could do was gasp with
me pain of his very tight grip.

"Which means they're very wise eyes," he said in that
same murmur, pulling me closer to him by the fist in my
hair. "Considering what I can and just might have done to
you, you should be afraid of me. First, of course, I'll have
some personal pleasure from you, but after the centuries
I've lived, that usually isn't enough. I'm going to show
you off for a white as my personal triumph, but how long
that while continues depends entirely on you. There are no
light-haired women in this part of the world, which makes
it worth my while to keep you for a bit, but not if you

240 SHARON GREEN

don't learn very quickly how a female behaves toward her
god-king. Now, you will leam that quickly, won't you?"

There was no longer any amusement in his eyes, only a
chilling kind of madness, and I remembered what the
small people had said to us that night, and how deep-down
frightened they'd been. But I also remembered who and
what / was, and somehow the way he was hurting me
made saying what! had to easier.

"No matter low long you've lived, you'll never live
long enough to see that," I whispered, wishing I could
have spoken a little more forcefully. Despite what I'd said
I was afraid of him, and the fear didn't seem to want to
stop spreading.

"Then there will be other, more interesting things to
see," he said, the gleam strengthening in those eyes, and
then he turned and pulled me hard toward the center of the
platform step, moving me by the hair as he strode along.
My own stride was more of a running stumble, and it was
all I could do not to cry out in pain the way he was trying
to make me do. When we got to the center of the step he
threw me to the stone at his feet, and then his voice rang
out in that very high, very wide room.

"My loyal worshipers, you now see before you the
tribute sent to me by a brother god," he orated, the
self-satisfaction in his voice very thick. "As you know.
my brother gods fear me, but I do not fear them. I will do
as I wish with this gift sent to appease me, and they will
do nothing in return. In time this female will be sacrificed
to my godhood, proving once again that none may stand
against me, not even what is sent by other gods. I am your
god and your king, and my word and desires are supreme!"

"Thannar, god and king, blessed be his name," chanted
every voice in that room, the kneeling men looking up at
the figure above them, the figure that stood with its arms
raised in triumph. I sat on the stone at his feet, one hand to
my head, wondering if I'd have me chance to kill myself—or
him—before we reached the time of that "sacrifice," and
then something happened that shocked everyone in the
room.

"Thannar, god and fool, to spit on the indulgent gener-

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        241

osity of other gods," another deep voice rang out, coming
from floor level at the far side of the platform. "As you
mink so little of the gift given you, it will now, in punish-
ment, be withdrawn."

By that time he had climbed to the platform step to stare
calmly at the man in silver, but he was the only calm one
in the entire room. I gaped at him stupidly, finding it
impossible to believe that he was really there, seeing the
way the torches made his bronze eyes glow even more
strongly than usual. The kneeling men below the platform
were gasping and exclaiming in horror, but the man with
the silver eyes was nearly foaming in rabid rage.

"You would dare?" he demanded, his voice choked and
nearly incoherent, one fist held closed before him in fury.
"/ am the god here, and there are no others, none! My
word is supreme and my will is all! No cub can come to
give me insult in my world, I refuse to allow it! To your
knees, boy, and worship at the feet of your divine supe-
rior! Down, I say!"

"And 1 say no," Rik answered, still as calm and unim-
pressed as he had been, his arms folded across his leather
shirt. His sword hung sheathed at his side, but since the
man in silver had no sword, he "seemed to be ignoring it.

"Then you will die!" Thannar'spat, insane triumph
glaring from his eyes. He appeared to be delighted that Rik
had refused to grovel like everyone else, that he would
now be given an opportunity to do something he loved to
do. The silver gleam of his eyes began growing and
strengthening—and then started spreading to the rest of
him! As his form began blurring and shirting everyone in
the room cried out in terror, giving voice to a fear they
were very well used to, but still cringed before. I moved
quickly along the stone to the very edge of the platform
step, trying to get out of the way, finally understanding
why the people of that world thought Thannar was a god.
He was a man with a link-shape, something no one else of
that world could possibly be, and because of that was
someone to be worshiped.

The first cries of terror had been augmented by more,
since Rik hadn't just stood there waiting to be attacked.

242 SHARON GREEN

He, too, had reached toward his link-shape, and in a
matter of moments the platform held two beasts rather than
two men. One was big and silver and the other was big
and bronze, and as soon as they were fuliy formed they
leaped at each other, snarls of blood-need sounding instead
of words. They came together with a thud of strength, and
then it was time for claws and teeth.

"The will of a god is not to be denied," came a sudden
chanting from behind me. all of the voices clearly petri-
fied. "No man can conquer a god nor refuse his desires.
We who are nothing bow to the one who is ail. His victory
will be our victory, and in his victory he will stand alone.
We who are nothing worship the one who is all. His glow
lights the way of our lives . . ."

The voices continued on and on, a terrified litany which
became a backdrop for the raging battle on the platform
step. Amid the snarling and biting and clawing that the
words nearly drowned out, it came to me that the prayer
wasn't being specifically directed toward Thannar; not
once was the god-king's name mentioned, and I wondered
if the people were using that particular prayer to cover
themselves. If Thannar won, they were just speaking the
words he had obviously taught them; if by some chance
the strange god won, he should not feel insulted over not
having been prayed to. I just sat there and watched the
fight, half afraid to wonder what Thannar had meant by
calling Rik a "cub." It was true that people with link-
shapes lived a very long time, and Thannar was a good
deal older than Rik; did that mean his link-shape was also
a better, more experienced fighter?

Right at that moment, it was difficult coming up with an
answer to that question; the two beasts were too closely
locked into their battle. A sharp-fanged silver mouth bit at
a bronze shoulder and leg white a bronze head tried bury-
ing its mouth in a silver throat, and the two bodies thrashed
around so violently with slashing claws that the two colors
almost merged into one. Blood, of course, had already
been drawn on both of them, but neither one was paying the
least attention to it. I began moving around the platform
step to the side Rik had appeared from, trying even harder

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

243

to keep out of the way. The middle of that fight was no
place for anyone who didn't have teeth and claws like
theirs, and 1 was suddenly all through with resenting being
left out of things.

The snarling, raging battle went on for what seemed like
a very long time, but I suppose it wasn't as long as it felt.
None of the natives tried interfering, of course, and even if
I'd been able to, I wouldn't have known when to do it.
One minute the silver beast had the upper hand, so to
speak, but the next minute it was Rik's turn, the great
bronze body of his link-shape forcing its way free of silver
claws or fangs to counterattack with a ferocity that at least
matched his opponent's. The bloody wounds were increas-
ing on both of them, and every time teeth closed on fur
and flesh 1 could almost feel the pain of it myself.

A fight between human opponents can sometimes end in
a draw, but that doesn't often happen with our fiercer
cousins who fight with natural weapons. Only if one of the
opponents is willing to run can both of them survive a
meeting, and in that instance there was no such willing-
ness. The ongoing back and forth stopped suddenly when
the silver beast lunged for a bronze head and eye and
missed, leaving itself wide open" and extended. The chant-
ing filling the room faltered when lightning-quick fangs
closed on a silver throat, causing a howl of pain that rang
from ceiling and walls with a near-human desperation. The
silver beast who was Thannar had made a mistake, the last
one he would ever make, something everyone knew at
once when the howl abruptly cut off. The fangs in his
throat were sinking deeper and deeper despite the way his
body thrashed violently, trying to free itself, his claws
raking uselessly at the bronze body now above his. Grimly,
the bronze beast refused to release his hold, and slowly,
slowly, the silver body ceased its struggles before one last
shudder racked his body. Then he lay still, lifeblood ruin-
ing the shining silver of his coat, a dullness glazing the
silver of his eyes, death pouring forth from the gaping
wound in his throat. Thannar the god-king was no more,
and the bronze beast standing over him with blazing eyes
challenged anyone or anything to deny that.

244

SHARON GREEN

For an instant there was absolute silence in that very
large room, as though there wasn't anyone in it who was
as much as breathing, and then, as though some signal had
been given, everyone including the few guardsmen were
on their knees with their heads to the stone. The god-king
was dead, long live the new god-king, but that wasn't the
way the victor wanted it. His beast body shimmered in a
bronze glow and then he had changed back to a man, one
who didn't spend any time at all gloating over his win or
inspecting his new foHowers. He moved soundlessly to the
place 1 kneit, lifted me to my feet by one arm, then pulled
me down the steps of the platform after him, hurrying
silently to the rear of the platform. Just beyond the curve
of the steps was a section of stone not quite as solid as it
appeared; one push and it had opened like a door, and then
I was thrust through into a narrow corridor of black.

1 suppose the narrow corridor would have been com-
pletely silent if not for the heavy thudding of my heart,
especially after Rikkan Addis closed the stone door again
behind him, making the darkness even more solid- Very
briefly he'd let go of my arm, and then he was squeezing
past me and taking my hand instead.

"There aren't many turnings along this passageway, but
there are a few," he whispered, the faint sound of a sword
scraping stone coming with his words. "If you don't let go
of my hand we won't get separated, so hold on tight. We
ought to have a decent head start before they come charg-
ing after us, and they won't be able to come through that
door, not with the bar in place. Let's go."

"Wait a minute!" I whispered back, confused by what
he'd said. "Why should they come charging after us? You
beat Thannar in a fair fight, and the way they bowed to
you proves they know it. Won't they be too afraid to try
and stop you?"

"Laciel, all their lives are built around having a god-
king, and now they don't have one," he answered with a
sigh as soft as his words. "As soon as they come out of
their shock and realize I've left the palace, they'll come
after me to get me back. Right now they have to have a
god-king, and I don't want to be conscripted for the job.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

245

There are other things I'd much rather be doing, and
bowing and scraping makes me uncomfortable. Now will
you please come on?"

He began moving deeper into the dark with his big hand
wrapped around my fingers, which left me no choice but
to go along. Not that I would have stayed if I'd been given
the choice; my visit at the palace hadn't been the highlight
of our quest journey for me, and the thought of getting out
of there was one with a lot of appeal in it.

Our pace along the very dark passageway was faster
than I'd thought it would be, a deliberate traversal rather
than a cautious groping through the unknown. It finally
came to me that Rik was probably able to see a lot better
than I could, and that was why he hadn't used a torch—
which would be smoky and hot in such confined spaces.
Every time I stepped on a pebble or a rough spot on the
uneven stone floor I cursed silently under my breath,
wishing / could see that way; if you can't do magic, the
next best thing is to have a magical talent.

It took quite a while to make our way to the other end of
the passage, and when Rik cautiously opened the door
there, i was surprised to see the outer night rather than
some place inside. He carefulty stuck his head out and
looked all around, then took my hand again and pulled me
after him, both of us running toward the comer of a dark
building about sixty feel from our exit door. He didn't
slow down until we were around that comer, and even
then he didn't slow much. We continued at a half run,
constantly looking all around, until we peered through a
tali hedge to the left of the building we'd been moving
near; behind the hedge were five brown horses tied to a
post, and a minute later we were mounted and moving
along a very dark, very quiet street.

Dressed as I was, I was terribly cold, very uncomfortable
in the hard leather saddle, and bruising my feet even more
in the metal stirrups, but that didn't seem to be the time to
mention it. Somewhere behind us and rather far away a
sound floated on the night air, something tike shouting and
yelling from numberless throats. There was an agonized
quality to the shouting, a hint of loss and a desperate need

246

SHARON GREEN

to heal that loss, and I would have shivered even if I
hadn't been cold. People, it seemed, weren't very eager to
lose their god, even when he was as mad as Thannar had
been.

Finding our way out of the city took even more hours, a
combination of locating the proper streets, slinking through
shadows, hiding at the least chance a noise meant someone
was coming, finding a detour when groups of natives
appeared to be somewhere ahead of us. Slinking on horse-
back isn't the easiest thing to do, and once, when a troop
of Sacred Guards rode past us so close that we could have
touched them, 1 understood what Dranna had meant about
feeling helpiess. If any of them had had a torch to light the
deep shadows where we were hiding, they would have
seen us in an instant. Rikkan Addis would have been able
to get away by shifting to his link-shape, but I would have
been able to do nothing more than sit there and let them
recapture me. Not that they really wanted me. It was a
new god-king they were after, and I would be nothing
more than an addition to his harem.

Getting out of the city was harder than we'd thought it
would be, and if we hadn't used our horses as a diversion
we might not have made it. We headed them back into the
city with duplicate slaps, and when some of the roadblock
guards went to investigate the source of their receding
hoofbeals, we slipped through their thinned-out line and
ran for the fields. Once again Rikkan Addis had my hand.
and if he hadn't kept pulling me along I probably wouldn't
have gotten very far. The fields were dark, and I kept
stepping on things that hurt my already-bruised feet, and
my lungs felt as though they were on fire, and I was still
coid in spite of the way I had begun sweating from the run
and the trot we eventually slowed to. The field we crossed
was wet with dew, but after ten or fifteen minutes a
misting drizzle began adding to it. The automaton clamped
to my hand ignored it all and just kept trotting along, a
pace I was sure was a concession to me. I thought briefly
about forcing myself back to a run just to show that 1
could, then immediately dismissed the idea. Running again
was something I couldn't, not unless my life depended on

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

it, and maybe not even then. All I could do was trot along
with one hand to the necklace beads to keep them from
clacking, and hope we got wherever we were going before
I dropped in my tracks.

When we finally stopped, it took me a minute to under-
stand that we had. I'd been concentrating on nothing more
than keeping my feet moving, and when I looked up to see
where we were became aware of the dark, looming build-
ing we stood beside. It had to be one of the big barns we'd
passed when we'd ridden around the city, and Rikkan
Addis was fiddling with something that hung down the
side of it just where we'd come to a halt.

"Do you think you can hold on tight around my neck?"
he asked over his shoulder in a low voice, unbelievably
sounding not winded at all. "It won't be very long now
before it starts getting light, and we'd never make it past
the rest of these fields before that even on horseback. We
have to have some place to hide until it gets dark again."

"But won't they find us if we stop this close to the
city?" 1 asked with the small amount of breath I had left,
wishing I hadn't thought of the objection. "Shouldn't we
try for a barn—farther away?"

"Even if that was a better idea, I don't think we could
make it," he said, turning to look down at me while trying
not to sound really concerned—about me. "Happily, this
is the best place for us, and the place where our horses are
hidden. Let's get inside, and then I'll tell you all about
it."

Arguing or asking for answers right then would have
taken breath I didn't have, and getting inside wasn't sim-
ply a matter of opening a door and walking in. What
Rikkan Addis had been fiddling with was a rope, and in
order to get up that rope I had to lock my arms around his
neck from behind him while he climbed the thing. I hon-
estly didn't see how he could pull the weight of two people
up a rope in the dark, using only his arms, but the harder
part turned out to be holding onto him while he did it. If
the run across the fields hadn't caused him to breathe hard,
that climb up the rope made up for it; he was close to
panting before we reached a darker rectangle that was a

248              SHARON GREEN

wide, unshuttered window, and I was close to losing my
grip on him. As soon as I could I reached out with one
foot, hooked it in the window just as he did the same, and
then we were swinging inside to where we could stand
again Rather than standing I moved back a few feet and
then let myself fall to the thick straw covering the wooden
floor, wondering if I'd ever be able to use my arms again,
but the man I'd been holding onto didn't do the same. Still
breathing hard he pulled all of the rope inside the window,
and only then moved away from it to collapse to the straw
the way I had. I lay there listening to both of us trying to
use up all the air that world contained, intending to get my
breath back and then ask a few questions, but my exhaus-
tion had another idea. Even before the gasping had stopped.
1 fell asleep.

CHAPTER 9

I awoke to gray daylight, but the sound of voices kept me
from sitting up or making any noise at all. At first I
couldn't remember why it was necessary to be so quiet,
except that it was often necessary in the days of my
growing up on the streets, to avoid the owner of the
building I'd slept in, or members of the city guard on their
rounds. Then I saw Rikkan ^.ddis just below the open
window, listening to what was bemg said, and it all came
back.

Before whoever was outside the barn left, I was able to
notice that the misty drizzle of the night before had turned
into a heavy, monotonous rain, and that Rikkan Addis'
rust-colored leather shirt was no longer on him. Somehow
it had gotten draped over my back instead, making it
necessary for only my legs to burrow under the thick
straw- The rain made the day almost as cold as the night
had been, and lying there unmoving was no chore at all.
After the voices had stopped and sounds came of horses
moving on, my companion took a quick peek out the
window, then crawled closer to where I was lying.

"That's twice this place has been checked, and twice
they've left satisfied we couldn't be here," he said, keep-
ing his voice low but not whispering. "They know the
locks can't be opened except with a key, and hoist ropes
are never allowed to hang free from loft windows. Since
there's no other way in, we can't be here. And since the

250

SHARON GREEN

rain wiped out any tracks we might have left, all they can
do is ride around in circles, hoping to stumble over us
where we're hiding in the fields."

"While we lie safe and comfortable behind locks that
can't be opened without a key," I said, watching him lean
on his elbows while I raised up on mine. "What would we
have done if that rope hadn't been left out accidentally? Or
if they used those sniffers the small man mentioned the
other night to track us? Ones, I might add, they may still
use."

"They can't use their sniffers," he denied with some-
thing of a grin, his bronze eyes glowing very faintly. "Our
first visitors were discussing that very point, and cursing
their luck and the sniffers together. It seems that the
animals have no trouble picking up my scent, but flatly
refuse to follow it no matter what their handlers do to try
forcing or bribing them. Very wise animals, those sniffers,
to know the difference between legitimate quarry and a
god."

"Anything that would go after a link-beast would have
to be crazy," I said with a snort, appreciating the point.
"But you still haven't said what would have happened if
we hadn't been lucky enough to find that rope."

"Luck had nothing to do with it," he answered, a
strange, soft expression flickering briefly in the eyes that
watched me. "That rope was left out on purpose, but the
story will make more sense if I start from the beginning.

"Kadrim, Zail and I finished off the rest of those na-
tives as fast as we could, but by then the ones who had
taken you had too much of a lead for us to catch up with
them. instead of wasting our time trying, we rode after Su
and Dranna, and then the five of us sat down to do some
planning. Kadrim ended up working out most of the de-
tails, but we all had a hand in putting it together.

"We spent the rest of the day hiding, then at nightfall
made our way back to the city. It had been decided not to
take any unnecessary chances, so Kadrim and Dranna
stayed with the horses while Su, Zail and I entered the city
on foot. Su was following the trail of a horse carrying
double, and, thanks to your friend the wizard, had no
trouble following it in the dark through the streets of a

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

251

city. To keep from being seen we practically had to inch
our way along in the tavern district, but eventually we
reached the place you'd been taken—a palace it didn't
seem possible to sneak into. At that point Zail took over
the lead, and we followed him on a tour around the outside
walls.

"When he stopped in front of one wall no different from
any of the others, Su and 1 thought he was giving up. It
was dark as the inside of a bear on that street, but his
special talent must have had a treatment like the one Su's
tracking talent was given. His hand had been moving
along the blank wall as we walked, and suddenly he was
standing still and using nothing but that hand. Once it
found what it was looking for he began using the other
one. and then both of them were moving together. It was
fairly clear he thought he'd discovered something, and five
minutes later he proved he was right. He pressed hard high
up on the wall, and the door leading to that passage
popped open. He muttered something about it being a
fairly simple, fairly obvious bolt-hole, but whatever it
was, it gave me a way in.

"According to plan, Zail and Su left to go back to
Kadrim and Dranna, and I entered the palace alone. I
waited until 1 knew they had to be'clear of the city, then 1
began prowling around, following the side passages off the
main one, trying to pick up your scent. My link-shape
would have known it if I came anywhere near you, but not
once did I catch any hint of your presence. After hours of
getting nowhere 1 took some time out to sleep, then went
to my alternate plan once I was rested enough to do it. 1
couldn't find your scent anywhere, but there was another
scent all around I couldn't miss. The god-king must have
inspected his secret tunnel on a regular basis, and by
checking all the doors leading out, I finally found where
he was. I knew they'd be bringing you to him at some
time. so watching him seemed the second best way of
locating you. I listened at the door. stepped out right on
the cue he gave me, then went on from there.

"Right now we're following the last of Kadrim's plan,
the part that was taken care of early last night. Dranna
opened the locks to let them bring our horses in here. and

SHARON GREEN

252

while that was being done the rope was dropped out of the
window. Leaving one of the locks open would have been
easier than the rope, but the locks also need a key to close
them, and without Dranna we wouldn't have been able to
manage it- We all knew it wouldn't be possible to get you
out of the city before dark, but we didn't know whether
there would be pursuit or not. If we'd gotten out in the
clear, we would have broken a lock, left the stolen horses
here in exchange for ours, and then would have continued
on to where we'll be meeting the others. With half the city
looking for us and daylight not far off, we had to use the
barn as a hideout- Which is just as well. Are you hungry?"

It so happened 1 was very hungry, but for some reason 1
wasn't ready to accept the thought of food. There were
still a few things to be said, and putting them off was
something else 1 wasn't ready to do.

"How did you know their god-king was someone like
you, someone with a link-shape?" 1 asked, ignoring his
question. "And how did you know you could beat him?"

"1 didn't know," he said with a very brief hesitation,
shifting over onto his left side but still keeping his eyes on
me. "Until I entered that passageway and picked up his
scent, 1 had no idea what he was. I doubt very much that
he was bom on this world, most likely he came through a
gate somehow, and then was stranded here. Whether he
came through insane or became that way because of the
long years of exile is something else I don't know, but
living as a god-king certainly impaired his judgment. Just
because he was still in his prime he thought he could take
me, and didn't understand until the very end that I was an
active fighter while his years of action were far behind
him. Tearing apart helpless, terrified natives isn't the same
as facing one of your own, especially not in link-shape."

"Then you came in after me without-having any idea of
what you'd be facing," 1 summed up, feeling that strange
feeling of anger and something else that seemed to have
begun the night before without my being completely aware
of it. "Without even stopping to think about it you just
came charging in, determined to have things go your way,
trusting to luck that you'd find a way to win. You are a
damned fool!"

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

253

"If I am, then the honor of the position isn't mine
alone," he came back, a sudden annoyance in him as he
watched me struggle to sitting in the straw. "1 wasn't the
one who joined a fight against direct orders, a fight that
was none of my business, and one that got me taken
captive because I didn't have the good sense to stay out of
it! You and I will be having a long talk about that once
we're out of this, but for . . ."

"What I do or don't do is my own business!" I inter-
rupted harshly, brushing my straw-decorated hair back
with one hand. "If I did something to get myself captured
that was my business, and you had no right interfering'
And look at you! You were hurt so badly during that fight
that some of your wounds are only half-healed even after
transition! Did I ask you to do that for me? Did I? I didn't,
and you know it, so you had no right doing it!"

I turned my back on him and hugged myself around,
trying to stop the clacking of my bead necklace caused by
the trembling that was only partly due to the cold. If he
had been killed it would have been my fault, just the way
he'd said it would be if I kept on disobeying Graythor's
wishes. He'd had no right risking his life to save me,
especially not the way he had", especially not after I'd
stranded us there. Why hadn't he just left me alone, to live
or die by myself?

"You're absolutely right," he said after a moment of
silence, his unexplainably softened voice mixed in with the
sound of movement in the straw. "You didn't ask me to
save you, so whatever happened to me was my fault, not
yours. It was all my own idea, so you can't be blamed.
Here, you've dropped the shirt I put around you. Maybe
you'd better get into it before you catch a ..."

"1 don't want the damned shirt!" I flared, turning to
push it away as he began putting it around my shoulders
again- "And it was my fault, all of it, for doing something
stupid and mindless! But you didn't have to make it worse
by coming after me! You didn't have to do that!"

"As a matter of fact I did have to," he answered, still
nerve-rackingly calm, still messing with that shirt. "Here,
slide your arms in and I'll help you put it over your ..."

I just couldn't stand any more. 1 made a sound that

SHARON GREEN

254

couldn't possibly be translated into words, grabbed the
leather shirt out of his hands, then started scrambling to
my feet. I was going to throw that damned shirt out the
window as far as I could, not giving a damn even if more
natives rode by and found it. 1 made it to my knees with
the shirt held tight in my left arm, but somehow he must
have realized what I intended doing. He surged up and
threw his arms around me before I could stand, then pulled
me back down to the straw with him.

"Let me go!" 1 shouted as I tried to break free, wasting
time pounding at him with my right fist. "Damn you, let
me go!"

"Not until you calm down," he said, having as little
trouble holding me still as Kadrim had said he would. "I'd
use Persuasion to help you if 1 could, but you know it
won't ..."

"Help me!" I nearly screamed, even wilder than I had
been. "Why would you want to help me? After everything
I said and did to you, why were you the one to come after
me? It isn't fair, it just isn't fair!"

"To me, you mean," he said with the strangest smile,
his arms holding me tight against him despite the way I
was struggling. "You said every nasty thing to me you
could think of, and now I'm the one who risked his life
saving you. The lack of fairness in that is really bothering
you, but it shouldn't. I was the one who had to come after
you, and for the same reason that I was made leader of the
expedition."

"I—don't understand," I stumbled, also not understand-
ing how his body and arms could be so warm. It was as
though the damp wasn't touching him at all, as though a
small, steady fire burned under his skin.

"It's perfectly simple," he answered, using one hand to
smooth my hair, his bronze eyes glowing faintly from the
inner fire. "When you said I was the only one on this
expedition who had no true, necessary talent that would
help retrieve the balance stone, you were absolutely right.
Of the six of us, I'm the only one who's expendable, the
only one who doesn't have to survive if the stone is to be
retrieved. If someone has to die in order for one or more of
me rest of you to live, that's my job; and since 1 know it

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

255

and accept it, it's easiest if I'm the one giving the orders
for it. That's the reason I'm leader of this expedition, and
one of the reasons why I came after you."

"No, that can't be true," I whispered, feeling the cold
now inside me. "Graythor isn't like that, he would never
do something like that. To send someone along with this
expedition just so they could die!"

"Only if it becomes necessary," he corrected me gently,
trying to hold me closer to stop the trembling that had
started again. "The rest of you are vital to this quest, so
you can't be spared. And you can't blame the wizard for
being practical with something this important. It's a matter
of one life in exchange for millions."

"No," I said again, blinking my eyes against the blurri-
ness, and then my face was buried in his chest, one way I
didn't have to look at him. It was my people he was
willing to give up his life for, a world full of strangers he
didn't even know, knowledge of the need alone enough to
make him do it. Useless, I'd called him, and incompetent
and an imbecile and everything else 1 could think of, and
all the while he'd— I hid my face to keep from looking at
him, and wished I could hide my shame in a deep, deep
pit.

"Come on now, it isn't as bad as you're picturing it,"
he said in a coaxing way, stroking my hair again. "There's
nothing to say that I will die, and the position has benefits
as well as drawbacks. I got to rescue the prettiest sorceress
1 ever met, didn't I? And at the cost of nothing more than
a few scratches? And—before anything was done to hurt
her?"

The questioning in his voice showed he was at it again,
worrying about someone else instead of himself. I couldn't
understand how it was possible to be that selfless, but I no
longer had the least doubt that he was. Or that 1 was as far
. from it as you can get and still pretend to be human.

"I can't tell you how small and ashamed I feel," I
whispered, raising my head to look at him. "No matter
what you say, we both know that you will die, just the way
InThig did. I never got the chance to tell it I was sorry for
what I'd said, and if it happened twice I don't think I
could stand it. I was wrong to treat you the way I did, and

256

SHARON GREEN

I really am sorry. And I'm sorry you had to get hurt
helping someone who doesn't deserve any help. 1 promise
1*11 miss you almost as much as I miss InThig."

I put my head down again, feeling so miserable that
crying would have been something of a step upward. I
didn't know what had made me tell him about how i felt
over InThig's loss, it had just seemed to come out, but if
I'd had to tell anyone it should have been Rik. InThig had
liked Rik, and I—I had loved InThig.

"It's nice to know I'll be missed when I'm gone," Rik
said in an odd murmur, almost as though he were trying to
keep from sounding amused. "And almost as much as
InThig. That's quite a compliment, and it was worth a few
scratches to hear it. But you still haven't said whether or
not I got to you before they hurt you. Did I?"

"They didn't do anything but put me in this stupid
costume," 1 said raising my head again. "Not that it
would have made any difference even if they had."

"It would have made a difference to me," he said very
firmly, his bronze eyes glowing as his fingers wiped at my
cheek. "If they'd hurt you, I would have done a little
more than simply turning their god into a rug. And as far as
that costume goes, 1 don't think it's stupid at all. If you
want the truth, I find it very—appealing."

"You wouldn't find it that appealing if you were the
one who had to wear it," I came back, feeling the sudden
flush in my cheeks. "I feel stupid, and naked—not to
mention cold."

"No, I don't think I'd find it very appealing if I were
the one who had to wear it," he agreed, showing a faint
grin. "It's too bad we don't have anything else for you to
wear, but maybe we can do something about your being
cold. Is this any better?"

He had gathered me even closer than he'd been holding
me before, and was looking down into my eyes in a way
that made me feel very strange. Outside the rain dripped
and dripped, making the air damp and chill, but the circle
of his arms wasn't letting it touch me. Only his warmth
was touching me, and his wide, strong hands holding me
close.

"I nearly went mad when I thought they might be

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

257

hurting you," he said, his hand stroking my hair again, his
voice very soft. "I swore to myself that I'd beat you for an
hour if I ever got you out of that place in one piece, and I
think you'll agree now that you deserve that beating. Don't
you."

His eyes refused to let mine go, and although I squirmed
a little, I couldn't completely deny what he'd said. It had
been a number of years since I'd been responsible to
anyone but myself, but back in the days I had been,
Morgiana and Uncle Graythor would have seen to it that a
beating was the least of what I got.

"If we ever get back, are you going to tell Graythor
what I did?" I asked, beginning to feel upset again. "I
know we'll probably be trapped here forever, but if some-
how we do manage to get back—will you tell him?"

"Is there any reason I shouldn't?" he countered, his
expression shifting very slightly to one I couldn't read.
"He told me that you usually call him uncle, and that he
cares for you as much as you care for him. Don't you
think he's entitled to know what almost happened to you?"

"But it will just get him upset for nothing," 1 objected,
having no trouble picturing Graythor's "upset." Until
you've seen a wizard of his caliber really angry, you
haven't seen anything. "If you like "you can—beat me the
way you said you wanted to, just as long as you don't say
anything."

"To keep the wizard from getting upset," he murmured
with a nod, and this time 1 was certain he was amused.
"I'm sure he would really appreciate being considered like
that, but you're giving me something of a problem. You
see, the urge to beat you has passed."

"Passed," I echoed, now feeling more ill than upset. I
was sure we weren't going to get out of there, but what if
we did. . . ?

"Of course, mere might be something we could substi-
tute for the beating," he said thoughtfully, now toying
with my hair. "You probably won't like it much, and if
you don't I can't blame you, but—"

"What?" I asked when he let the words trail off, put-
ting one hand to his arm. "If you have a suggestion, at
least let me hear it."

2cg                              SHARON GREEN

"Well, there has been something I've wanted to do ever
since we first met," he said, bringing his eyes back to
mine. "I'm sure you won't find it pleasant, but if you
really want to save the wizard all that worry ..."

"Go—go ahead," I managed, having no real idea what
he intended, but still anxious to get it over with. It would
probably hurt, or be disgusting, or maybe just be ex-
tremely distasteful. I thought I had braced myself against
just about anything, but I still felt shocked and surprised
when he put a big hand to my face, raised it to his, and
then kissed me.

People kept saying I was innocent, and maybe I hadn't
been kissed very much, and maybe I didn't know why his
kiss was so different from Zail's— Oh, Hellfire, I didn't
know anything but the fact that I was being kissed, gently
but very deeply, so deeply that I could feel it all the way
through me. His arms held me to the warmth of his body,
one of his hands behind my head, his lips kissing mine in a
way 1 could only feel, not describe. It went on until my
head swam, until I thought I was going to faint, but when
it ended it felt as though it hadn't lasted any time at all.

"That's—that's what you wanted to do?" I asked as
soon as I could, which wasn't really very soon. He was
still holding me in his arms, and my entire body felt as
though it were tingling.

"Ever since I first saw you," he agreed, those eyes
watching me again. "Considering how you feel about me
it must have been pretty awful for you, but don't forget it
was done in a good cause. Now the wizard won't be given
any unnecessary worry,"

"No, he won't," I said, trying to gather together my
thoughts from where they'd been scattered to. "But—that
was just one kiss. Maybe—since it's Graythor—maybe
you should take another, just to be sure you don't acciden-
tally say anything, just to be certain the payment balances
against the favor."

"You know, that sounds like a good idea," he said with
a very soft smile, somehow understanding what I'd meant
despite the babbly, scattered way it had come out. "Just to
be on the safe side."

And then he kissed me again, but there was nothing

THE PAR SIDE OF FOREVER

259

repetitive or boring about the effort. It felt as though his
kiss would be something new and wonderful even if he
kissed me a thousand million times, and all I wanted to do
was float away to the place it took me and stay there
forever. I expected it to go on and on, but suddenly he
broke it off and sat up away from me.

"I think that's all there had better be of that," he said in
a mutter, running one hand through his hair. "Let's find
something to talk about instead, or better yet, something to
argue about. Arguing is probably the best thing we can
do."

"But I don't want to argue with you," I protested,
sitting up and wrapping my arms around myself against the
chill his letting me go had allowed back. "Rik, I didn't
think I'd ever say this, but I—enjoyed—having you kiss
me. Didn't—you—enjoy it?"

" 'Enjoyed it' isn't the proper phrase," he said, turning
his head to look at me with a faint, humorless smile.
"Laciel, it was fun talking you into kissing me, but it
moved beyond fun faster than I thought it would. I sup-
pose I should have known—it was really stupid to go even
that far—to steal a kiss like a cub after his first transition—
Damn it, do you have any idea what I'm talking about?"

"Not really." I said, trying not to^hiver from how cold
I was, "All I know is that I want you to kiss me again.
And you promised to keep me warm. Tell me why you
can't kiss me again and keep me warm."

He stared at me in silence for a very long moment,
something like pain in the expression in his eyes, a pain I
couldn't understand. Then he sighed, a sound of defeat if I
ever heard one, but somehow I felt the defeat wasn't mine.
When he came back to fold me in his arms again, I
became certain of it.

"Ever since I joined this quest, my word has become
worthless," he murmured as he kissed me lightly, softly, a
faint self-disgust in his tone.' 'I promised myself I wouldn't
do this, and now look at me."

"I don't want to look at you," I murmured back,
returning his kisses and giving a few of my own. "What I
want to do is kiss you, and have you kiss me, and— Oh,
Rik! Stop worrying and just do it!"

260 SHARON GREEN

He looked down at me with those glowing, bronze eyes,
shook his head slightly as he smiled, then went ahead and
did it.

I have no idea how much time passed, but afterward I
lay comfortably in his arms, satisfied, contented, fulfilled,
happy—every positive word there is. Rik had made love
to me, beautiful love, giving me something I hadn't known
it was possible to have. He'd been nothing but gentle—and
yet he hadn't been gentle at all—or maybe gentle when he
had to be, and not when it wasn't called for. I shook my
head against his chest over the confusion I felt—and over
me confusion that had magically, literally magically, melted
away.

"Arc you regretting it already?" he asked, one hand to
my hair to show he meant the headshake. "Was that a 'no,
I'm sorry I did it', or a *no, I'm not sorry I did it'?"

"Definitely a 'no, I'm not sorry I did it'," I told him
with an inner smile, but the smile faded rather quickly.
"You asked me earlier if I was hungry; does that mean
there's food around here somewhere?"

"Nothing but more rabbit, but it should keep us from
starving," he answered, patting my back to ask me to sit
up- "Hold on a minute, and I'll get it."

He stood up and headed for me other side of the loft,
and I located his leather shirt and put it on. My bead
necklace was gone in me straw somewhere, and I really
didn't expect to miss it. While I waited I began pulling the
straw out of my hair, knowing I was going to have to give
him an explanation, but having no idea where to start. If I
waited until we'd eaten something it would give me a
chance to pull my thoughts together, to figure out what to
say. After we ate, it would be a good deal easier.

After we ate it was not easier. He had come back with a
leather package of rabbit and a large jar of water, the
containers most likely the result of pilfering in the city,
and had grinned to see what I looked like in his shirt. The
thing was about five sizes too large for me, and I'd had to
roil the sleeves up to find my hands. We shared the rabbit
and then the water, and then I had no further excuses to
keep quiet.

THE PAR SIDE OF FOREVER        26l

"Are you sure you don't mind my wearing this shirt?" I
asked as a compromise beginning, the subject having noth-
ing to do with what I really wanted to say. "If you're cold
I'll be glad to . . ."

"No, no, I'm not cold at all," he denied immediately,
those eyes on me in a way mat said he was telling the
truth. "Unless you're offering to share it, just forget about
it. "I didn't want to mention this sooner, but I can see
something's bothering you. Would you like to tell me what
it is?"

"Not really, but I suppose I have no choice," I mut-
tered, then sat straighter in the straw to look directly at
him. "It seems I owe you another apology, one I didn't
know I owed you. I've been blaming you for something
you had nothing to do with, but 1 didn't know that—and
didn't even realize I was blaming you."

"Now I understand completely," he said with a judicious
nod, leaning down to his left elbow on the other side of the
leather we'd used as a table. "I didn't do it, but you were
blaming me anyway, and now you're not blaming me any
more. Are you sure 1 didn't do it?"

"Positive," I answered, not quite up to responding to
his teasing. "I would have hnown it sooner if I hadn't
been under a spell, but Morgiana was trying to protect me,
to let me live as normal a life as possible. It wasn't
entirely normal, but I didn't know that until we began this
quest. The spell was also the reason I could never remem-
ber that nightmare."

I looked down at my hands, not nearly as together as I
was trying to sound, but also not as shattered as I might
once have been. I had me memory now and it was an
appalling one, but it was also softened by the passage of
years and considerably more bearable for not having been
dwelt on. And for being seen in the light of normality.
That had been the key, of course, and if it hadn't been for
Rik ... I couldn't bring myself to look up at him again,
but his patient silence encouraged me to begin the story.

"I grew up living on the streets, with a pack of other
kids, and even after I'd begun to trust Morgiana, I still
couldn't talk to her about what a lot of it had been like.
Most people consider the city Guard their protectors, for

262 SHARON GREEN

instance, but we were some of the ones they were protect-
ing people from. Usually if they caught you, you just got a
beating with their belts, but if you were a boy and old
enough, the army garrison was usually in need of recruits,
or maybe the merchant fleet. If you were a girl and old
enough, there were certain—houses—that paid for their
own kind of recruits. Because of that there weren't many
packs with older kids in mem, but there were still a
few. . . .

"Morgiana made it a policy never to pry, but after the
second or third time I'd had the nightmare she put me
under a compulsion and made me tell her about it. It had
happened not long before she'd found me, and 1 hadn't
been able to just bury it along with all the other ugly,
dirty things that had happened to me. We—we had found a
warehouse with a back door whose lock was broken, and I
had decided mat we had to risk sleeping there. The fact
that it wasn't abandoned made it dangerous, but I was sure
it would snow that night and some of my pack weren't
strong enough to survive sleeping in an alleyway in a
snowstorm. Once it was dark we slipped inside, then
found a place behind some sacks where we wouldn't be
easily seen.

"We woke up suddenly in the small hours of the morn-
ing, knowing we weren't alone, but also knowing the
newcomers were intruders rather than legitimate visitors.
There was a lot of moving around but no conversation, and
only one torch had been lit. We hid behind our sacks and
tried not to make any noise of our own, understanding at
last why me lock on the back door had been broken, but
we'd chosen the wrong hiding place. The intruders weren't
taking everything they could on a random basis, they had
certain specific items they wanted, and when they began
moving the sacks, they found us.

"I suppose you could say that we all knew each other
and be right, but until then our paths had crossed only at a
distance, never close up. They were a pack of older boys
who had managed to avoid the Guard long enough to
establish certain 'connections' in the city, and that night
they were acting for their major connection. They knew
we wouldn't—and couldn't—go to the Guard about what

r'
i?

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        263

we'd seen, that we were no threat to them at all as long as
we got out of there fast and melted back into the gutters,
so they decided to—show us how low down on the ladder
we were, and how untouchably important they had be-
come. Pack status was an important part of life to those of
us who lived it, and until then the status of my pack had
been fairly high."

When I paused in the narration 1 became aware of the
fact that Rik had moved closer to me, but he still wasn't
saying anything and he wasn't touching me. My gaze had
shifted to the brown cloth panel I still wore, and I had no
interest in moving it elsewhere.

"When I realized they were going to do something to
us," I continued, "I stood up and told the leader of the
other pack that I was willing to face him with challenge
sticks. He was a lot bigger than anyone I had faced until
then, but that didn't frighten me. I was big, and strong,
and no one had ever been able to best me in a challenge.
which was why the status of our pack was so high. Their
leader laughed at me, a deliberate insult, and then he came
closer and grabbed me. I fought him with all my strength,
strength that had, until mat minute, been totally adequate,
but it proved to be completely impossible to make him let
me go. He let me struggle and fight against him until 1
knew without doubt who was stronger, and then he threw
me down to the dirty wooden floor and—hurt me."

I had to stop again at that point, feeling the terror and
shame all over again, but I also discovered there was now a
lot more anger in me than there had been. I wasn't fright-
ened I was furious, and if I ever faced that animal again,
my challenge to him would not involve sticks.

"I wasn't me only one of the pack they hurt that way,
and what was worse, most of my pack were boys," 1 went
on with a sigh. "When they were through with us they
threw us out into the quietly falling snow, then went on
about their business. I think every one of us must have
been in shock, and when morning came I discovered that
half the pack had disappeared, and none of them ever
came back. Over the next few days the rest of us drifted
apart, trying to forget what had happened by surrounding
ourselves with people who didn't know, I suppose, or

264

SHARON GREEN

trying to find places that wouldn't scream at us silently in
the night. ... I knew I should try to find the one who did
that to us and challenge him in public where he couldn't
refuse, but the days went by and I couldn't quite force
myself to do it, and then Morgiana found me, and that's
all there was to it. I was out of it, but I still wasn't able to
forget."

"I—don't think 1 understand where I come into all
that," Rik said, his voice decidedly odd. When I looked
up at him I saw a look in his eyes I'd never seen before, a
rage that would have seemed more at home in the eyes of
his link-shape. "I grew up with my family in a close,
pleasant community, where nothing even remotely like—
that—ever happened. If it had, we probably would have
torn the scum apart."

'The leader of that older pack was a lot bigger than
me," I said with another sigh, wondering how you ex-
plained something like that diplomatically. "He was also
dark-haired, and had brown eyes that were rather strange.
There was a lot of red in me brown, like nothing any of us
had ever seen before, almost as though they were—"

"Bronze," he finished when I didn't, finally under-
standing all of it. "Every time you looked at me, all you
could think of was—him."

"And I didn't even know I was doing it," I agreed,
wishing his anger would come back to replace the hurt
look now visible in his stare. "Morgiana put a spell on
me, making me forget that night and everything that went
with it. That's why people would say things to me that
passed right over my head, and why I was so convinced I
was as strong or stronger than anyone around me, even
men. If I'd started thinking about things or doubting them,
I might have been able to break me spell and get to the
truth—before I was meant to. Morgiana wanted me to
know normal love before 1 remembered about hate and
hurt, and once I did, the spell dissolved itself."

"I have to admit I was wondering," he said, carefully
putting his hand out to touch mine. "You're certainly old
enough to have had experience, but everything you said or
did since the quest began pointed toward your being inno-
cent. Not to mention the fact that your response to me

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

indicated the same. I was surprised when reality didn't
match."

"But of course I'm not innocent," 1 said with a small
laugh, taking his hand hard to show that I saw nothing
wrong in touching him. "You have no idea how tired I am
of hearing people say 1 am. What was it you were wonder-
ing and surprised about?"

He looked at me sharply for a moment, just as though
he thought I was joking about something, and then he
seemed to be working very hard not to laugh.

"Let's discuss that some other time," he said, putting
his arm around me to draw me closer. "Right now I'd like
to spend some time being glad the mix-up is straightened
out- We have a lot of hours to wait before it gets dark."

He bent his head to kiss me, and I found I'd been right
in believing his kiss would be brand new every time- I
started to enjoy it the way I had the first time—and then
discovered that something was bothering me.

"If you get bored and distracted that easily, I think I'm
in trouble," Rik said suddenly, the kiss having ended
without my noticing it. "I've never seen anyone walk
away like that without moving her body."

"Something about what happened is bothering me," I
said with a small flush of embarrassment for the way he
was looking at me, making my usual mess when I tried
explaining about something I'd done. "Something is wrong,
and 1 can't figure out what it is."

"Of course you're bothered by what happened," he
said, immediately concerned, his arm tightening around
me. "How could you not be bothered? And there's noth-
ing wrong any more, so you don't have to . . ."

"No, no, not that," I interrupted, impatient with being
fussed over but trying not to show it, "There's something
about Morgiana's spell that doesn't make sense, but I
can't seem to figure out what it is. It was a perfectly
straightforward, selective forget-spell, so what could be
wrong with it?"

"You're asking me?" he said with a snort of amuse-
ment, taking his arm back before lying flat in the straw. "1
may know more about magic than the others, but I don't
have the necessary equipment to be involved with spells.

266

SHARON GREEN

Didn't it work right? Or didn't it all leave you when it
should have?"

"It seemed to work right," I said, leaning my elbows
on my folded legs as I prodded mentally at the problem.
"And as far as I know it all left me when it should have.
Of course there's no way of knowing if it all left me, not
until or unless the rest of it goes, if there is any rest of
it—"

I broke off and sat very still, finally seeing what had
bothered me, but it still didn't make any sense. Or maybe I
should say it made even less sense after I was able to see it
clearly.

"Rik, the spell lasted as long as it was supposed to,
then it dissolved the way it was supposed to," I said,
looking at him where he lay in the straw. "How do you
suppose it managed to do that?"

He opened his mouth, probably to say he didn't know,
and then he closed it again with a frown and sat up slowly
in the straw.

"As I understand it, a spell has to be maintained by the
one who cast it," he said thoughtfully, thumbing through
his memories. "As long as the Sighted is in the same
world with you, the spell won't weaken or dissolve. If you
leave that world or the Sighted does, the spell is immedi-
ately canceled—unless it's been cast over somethmg inani-
mate and has been made self-sustaining."

1 'Or unless the Sighted has given the job of maintenance
to someone else," I added with a nod for the rest of what
he'd said- "Now, Morgiana traveled more than I did, but
I've spent some time on worlds other than my own, and
there were occasions when we were both away at the same
time. If her forget-spell needed to be maintained, who was
doing the maintaining?"

"Who was around when she wasn't?" he countered
with a small shrug. "Isn't it possible the wizard had
something to do with it? If he was there as often as he said
while you were growing up . . ."

"Rik, the forget-spell worked perfectly, and dissolved
exactly on cue," I reminded him. "Look around you,
Who's the only one who was around then—and is also
here now?"

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        267

"But I thought you said you couldn't See," he pro-
tested, looking as unsettled as I felt. "If this world doesn't
allow magic, how could you have been maintaining a
spell?"

"That's what I'd like to know," I muttered, looking
hard at the inside wall of the bam. All I saw was rough,
shadowy wood and braces, nothing that had to be Seen.
"Morgiana obviously set up her spell to be maintained by
my talent, but how can a talent maintain something when
that talent isn't there?"

"And yet, it has to be there." he said, straightening
with frustration where he sat. "I hadn't noticed it sooner,
but your forget-spell hasn't been the only spell which was
maintained. Dranna hasn't forgotten how to ride a horse
since we came through the gate, Su can stilt follow any
trail she wants to follow, and Zail's finding that secret way
into the palace seemed to be more man ordinary ability.
The wizard had to set up his own spells with you as the
one maintaining them, otherwise they wouldn't have con-
tinued past the first gate. That means I was right, and there
is a way off this world involving magic!"

"You hope." I grumbled, not yet willing to share his
bright-eyed—or glowing-eyed—*enthusiasm. "If you can't
See a gate you can't use it, and all I-'m Seeing right now is
a dim barn and soggy landscape. There's still no guarantee
we won *t end up fanning next to those small, quiet people.''

"Well, if that turns out to be true, I can always accept
the earlier job offer made me," he said, leaning back into
the straw again with a grin. "Rikkan the First, god-king of
the world. If you're a good girl, I might even let you join
my harem. Provided you keep dressing like mat, of course.''

His grin widened and he began chuckling at the blush I
could feel spreading all over me, even the parts that were
covered. The problem was there were too many parts
wicovered, and Rikkan the First was enjoying the view.
Blushing, no matter how furious, has never been known to
bum anything, but every now and then it gets hot enough
to start a small fire.

"Oh, I don't mink you'd enjoy having me in your
harem," I said with what I hoped was deceptive mildness,
also hoping he didn't see how deep my hands were going

268

SHARON GREEN

in the straw as I leaned toward him. *'If I ever find myself
in that position, I'll consider it my duty to teach every
other woman there to call you—'fearless leader'!"

With the last two words I picked up all the straw I could
and threw it at him, catching him, as I'd thought I would,
right in the face as he began to sit up. 1 laughed as he
sputtered and batted his way through the storm, certain he
would be glad that wasn't used straw he was in the middle
of, but the laughing slowed when I was finally able to see
his expression.

"That was very fanny," he said, wiping at his face one
last time before starting to shift to his knees. "Especially
the part about what you were going to call me. Tell me,
what was that name again?"

Not being an idiot, 1 was already sliding back in the
straw away from him. trying to get enough distance be-
tween us to let me climb to my feet, but it wasn't working.
He had more experience than most in moving on all fours,
and even in human form he was faster at it than anyone
had a right to be. I finally tried to scramble up and make a
break for it, but two wide, bare arms closed around me,
and 1 didn't go anywhere but back down to the straw. I
tried once again to fight my way loose, but Kadrim had
definitely been right: Rik was even stronger than the red-
headed boy-man.

"You can't afford to even come close to murdering
me," I pointed out over my shoulder as 1 squirmed use-
lessly in his grip, fairly well pleased with the inarguable
logic mat had occurred to me. "If you're right about
magic being able to get us off mis world, I'm the only one
who might have it."

"Oh, 1 would never murder you," he came back much
too easily, and then I was on my back between his knees.
my wrists swallowed up in his hands. "It's just that being
called that name does something strange to me. Part of that
something, oddly enough, is that I suddenly feel as though
I'm improperly out of uniform. I think I'll need my shirt
back now."

"Oh, Rik, no!" I gasped, really upset, finding it impos-
sible to get my wrists loose. "Please don't take your shirt
back! There's nothing else for me to wear!"

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        269

"But leaders are expected to be properly dressed," he
countered, shifting his grip to hold both of my wrists in his
right hand. "I would say mat goes double or triple for—
certain kinds—of leaders. Other leaders, of course, don't
have to bother with that sort of convention."

"Oh, don't!" I pleaded as his free hand went to the
bottom of the shirt, obviously prepared to begin taking it
off me. It fit like a thigh-length tunic, loose and very much
too short, but still about a thousand times better than that
stupid costume they'd put me into. And half of the cos-
tume, the wide, bead necklace, was lost in the straw
somewhere!

"Well, you really do have to remember that you were
the one who first named me mat—certain kind—of leader,"
he said, paying a lot of attention to the way his hand was
slowly pushing the shirt up. "You're also the only one
who keeps on calling me that. My, my, this costume they
put you in really is brief, isn't it?"

"All right, I apologize!" I blurted, finally admitting I
was beaten. "I'm sorry I called you fearless leader, and I
won't do it again! I promise! Please don't take the shirt
back'"

"I'm sorry, but I'm afraid Proissed part of what you just
said," he responded with a faint grin, raising those bronze
eyes to my face as I squirmed helplessly in his grip. "I
think you'd better say it again. All of it."

"I said I'm—sorry for calling you fearless leader," 1
repeated after swallowing, very much aware of the fact
that he hadn't yet taken his hand away from the shirt. "I
also said I—promise not to do it again."

"Now, that's a good girl," he approved with a wider
grin, raising my arms out of the way so he might lean
down closer to me. "1 accept your apology and your
promise, but I think you ought to offer me a kiss to bind
the agreement. What do you say?"

What could I say? With absolutely no choice in the
matter I raised my face to his, but after a minute I was no
longer thinking about choices. His lips were soft and
warm, the sensations I felt incredible, and I realized that
he'd freed my wrists only when 1 found my hands touching
his back. I wanted to touch him very much right then, just

270 SHARON GREEN

the way he was touching me. In a little while I lost the
shirt after all, but at that point I didn't mind a bit.

When it was over I lay very close to Rik, his arms still
around me, listening to the soft sound of his breathing as
he slept. It felt so unbelievably good to be held that way,
and if it hadn't been likely to wake him 1 would have
kissed and stroked his face.

"If you ever do end up in my harem, you won't have to
worry about keeping your promise," he'd whispered be-
fore making love to me again, his lips warm against my
ear. "If 1 ever have a harem, you'll be the only one in it."

He'd chuckled at my blush of pleasure, and then we'd
gone on to something much more wonderful than chuck-
ling or blushing. Making plans or promises for the future
right then would have been stupid, but as I delighted in his
warmth I suddenly found myself very eager for the quest
to be over, and not only out of concern for the people of
my world. Rik had said he didn't have to die in order for
us to succeed, and I very much wanted to believe that.
Something else I had decided to believe was that we would
find a way off that world, and I would do everything I
could to help. If my talent was still maintaining spells, and
there was no doubt that it was, then—

That line of thought broke off very abruptly when an-
other, very obvious one came to take its place, and. sud-
denly the cold and damp moved in despite the warmth I
was surrounded by. There was another spell involved on
that quest, one I'd thought was being renewed every time
we passed through a gate, but that would have been the
hard way of doing it. As a sorceress I had enough strength
to maintain a dozen spells without even noticing it, and the
enemy had taken advantage of that. Rik hadn't made love
to me because he wanted to, but because he was under the
same spell Zail and Kadrim were.

I moved very slightly in the strong arms holding me,
wishing I could get up and go somewhere else, somewhere
it was possible to hide. When we'd first started that quest,
Rik hadn't even liked me; how could I have forgotten mat
so completely mat I'd almost begun falling in love with
him? Of course, I hadn't fallen in love with him, that

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        271

^       would have been idiotic, but I still felt very much a fool
'i       for having come so close. And how could 1 have forgotten
|f       about Dranna? She really liked Rik, and if I'd been an
|       idiot, she would have been very hurt. It wasn't as hard to
H       hurt other people as it was to hurt roe, and I'd almost
§       forgotten that.

}         Rik chuckled in his sleep and turned to his back, in the
^      process opening his arms and letting me go. I moved away
'^       from him slowly, for some strange reason almost reluctant
to go, and that was really stupid. Once the quest was over
I'd be able to get Graythor's help in canceling whatever
spells I was unknowingly maintaining, or I could simply
step through a gate alone. That would put an end to the
•:       spell, and then Rik would be back to feeling about me the
^       way he had to begin with. If I'd been silly enough to fall
in love with him, I would have found myself there all
alone.

!,          Just a few steps away I came across a rust-colored
^        leather shirt, lying discarded in the straw, and bent slowly
S,       to pick it up. Being more than half naked and very cold I
t       really needed to put it on, but instead I took it with me
^       behind two bales of hay, then simply sat holding it to me
for a very long time.        h-

^         It was almost dark when Rik finally woke, so we fin-

1ished what was left of the rabbit and water, then climbed
down from the loft to get our horses ready. Rik hadn't said
;.       much but he'd seemed—contented, somehow, his eyes
^       glowing with a fierce pleasure mat had nearly made the

rest of him glow as well. I felt very sorry for him, then,
|f       knowing how foolish he'd feel once the spell was gone,
H       but I didn't say any more to him about it than I had to
Kadrim and Zail. People under a spell like that find it
impossible to think clearly, and all any of them would
have done was argue-

"We'll be meeting the others in those woods," Rik said
once the horses were saddled, patting his roan before
going toward one of the barn walls to peer through a
crack. He was wearing his sword again, but I still had his
shirt. "Su told me that the trail didn't seem to go on very
far past where we had that fight."

272 SHARON GREEN

"Is it still raining?" I asked, glad to have my gray back
but not looking forward to climbing into his saddle with
what I was wearing.

"Yes it is, and we can use the cover," he answered,
still looking out. "If the weather was better we'd be
knee-deep in natives, instead of only seeing their patrols
and search parties from a distance. After what you've been
through you must be eager to get back to the others, to tell
them you're all right, and all about what happened to you.
Then we can tell them something together."

Together. Of course he didn't know what he was saying,
so I couldn't blame him for how—impatient and annoyed
his comment made me feel. But I did have to change his
mind, and thought I knew just the way to do it.

*'0h, you don't have to help me thank Zail for finding
mat secret passage," I said, carefully misinterpreting what
he'd said. "What he did was absolutely wonderful, and
I'm looking forward to thanking him all by myself."

"You're—going to thank Zail," he repeated, still facing
the wall but giving me the impression he wasn't looking
out any longer- "You're—looking forward to thanking
him?"

"Certainly," I said with a small laugh, turning away
from the stiffened back near the wall to stroke my gray's
nose. "He and I haven't had much luck in managing to be
alone together, but this should be a good excuse to finally
make it happen. He wants to marry me, you know, and he
comes from an old and wealthy family. Morgiana would
make a terrible fuss if he didn't,"

"But what about—" he began, sounding terribly hurt,
but then he broke it off to stand silent for a moment. When
he spoke again, he seemed to have regained control of
himself. "But what about Kadrim?" he asked, as though
that was what he'd meant to say all along. "Won't Kadrim
be—disappointed?''

"Kadrim is a good friend, but I don't love him," I
answered, still looking only at my gray. "You really
shouldn't marry someone you don't love, don't you think?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact, I do," he said in what was
nearly a monotone, and then didn't say anything else. His
hurt was so strong I could almost feel it where I stood, but

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

273

once the spell was gone he'd be glad he hadn't made a fool
of himself by announcing all sorts of idiotic things. He'd
be much happier then—just the way I was.

As soon as it was completely dark, Rik broke one of the
door locks and we left the barn. We walked our horses
through the field to make sure they didn't step in some-
thing and hurt themselves, but when we reached the side
of the road we were able to pick up a little speed. The rain
was still coming down rather heavily and I felt soaked
through and miserable, but anything was better than staying
in that barn- The need to be off that world was growing
larger and larger inside me, demanding my attention to the
extent that I now had an idea of sorts. 1 didn't know if it
would work, but the only way to find out was to try it.

We reached the stand of woods and passed the place
where the fight had happened, and a little farther down the
road we saw four shadows come out of the trees to meet
us. I hugged Su and Dranna, not realizing until right then
how much I'd missed them, and Rik accepted Kadrim and
Zail's enthusiastic congratulations with quiet words. We
were all back together again, and it was time to try my
idea.

"Su, I want you to follow thfr trail," I said as soon as
everyone had finished greeting us. "Follow the trail until
you can't see it any more, and then stop."

"Don't know what good that'll do," she answered with
a shrug that was agreement rather man refusal. "Unless
something's changed and you can See now."

"No, nothing's changed," I said with a headshake of
frustration. "I have an idea that probably won't work, but
it's still worth trying. Which way do we go?"

Su indicated the road we stood beside, and then led off
without any further comment. It was a beautiful night for a
ride, cold, rainy, dark and slippery, and after a number of
endless minutes one nearly-drowned person led five others
to a place on the road and then stopped.

"Trail stops Just ahead," Su announced, blotting at her
face briefly with her sleeve. "First time it didn't go off by
itself first, into the woods or over a hill. This time it stops
right smack in the middle of the road."

"And the horses aren't reacting to the presence of a

274

SHARON GREEN

gate," I observed, watching them shake their heads in
annoyance at the rain, but otherwise showing no objection
to continuing straight ahead. "I doubt if anyone on this
entire world can See, not even the animals, and that's why
the gate, if it's there, wasn't avoided like the ones on other
worlds. Well, all we can do is try it."

"What is it we're going to try?" Zail asked, dismount-
ing with the others when I did. The ground seemed to be
pure mud covered with four or five inches of water, and
standing in it barefoot made me wonder how Su walked
around like mat all the time.

"We're going to try to get through the gate," I an-
swered, forcing my teeth not to chatter from me icy-cold
water 1 was standing in. "It's true that if you can't See a
gate you can't use it. but there are two reasons for (hat,
and the first is fairly obvious: if you can't See it, how do
you tell where it is? The second reason, of course, has to
do with the ability to do magic: if you can't See, you don't
have the talent, and without the talent you can't open a
gate even if you happen to know where it is. The lack of
Seeing traps you all the way around."

' 'Then for what reason do we stand here courting serious
illness?" Kadrim asked, a question they all seemed to
have. "For what reason do we not return to our encamp-
ment till the rain has gone, and then ride out to begin the
conquest of this worid?"

"We're here because although I can't See, I've recently
discovered that my magical talent is still operating to some
extent," I explained, finding it impossible not to shiver
where I stood. "If there's any luck in this world at all, that
gate ought to open as soon as I get near it, whether or not 1
can See it doing it. We know where it is because Su can
see where me trail ends, so we're going to pretend it's no
different from any other gate and just go ahead and use
it."

"But what if it doesn't work?" Dranna asked in me
wide-eyed silence my explanation had produced in the
others, sounding as bedraggled as 1 felt- "What if we try it
and still don't go anywhere?"

"Then we go some place and wait for the rain to stop,
then spend some time nursing our pneumonia," I an-

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

275

swered, trying not to blame her for being as disbelieving
as I had been. "We can worry about that once we've
failed, but we have to try before we can fail. Let's get to
it."

Standing there arguing in the pouring, dripping rain
wasn't something any of us were dying to continue, so we
quickly got down to business. I had Su position me in the
place I usually stood in relation to a gate before we entered
it, using me end of the trail as a guide, and then I took
her hand and Kadrim's. The others stood by holding the
horses, ready to move fast if it worked, and I wondered
briefly if 1 were the only one holding my breath. I got as
good a grip on wet hands as I possibly could, silently
cursed at myself for stalling, then nodded woodenly at Su.
She was the one who had to step through first, taking half
of me with her, and if it didn't work—

Su took a step forward without hesitation, disappeared
in a shimmer, and then I was standing in the gate, able to
See it! It had worked, and we were on our way off that
world!

Zail came through first with his horses, then Dranna
followed by Rik, and then Kadrim moved his end of the
chain into the gate. We two went through the rest of the
way together and stepped out into the next world, a world
of short yellow grass as far as the eye could see, and a
yellow sky very near sundown. It was warmer on that
world and it wasn't raining, and out of the comer of my
eye I could See the bright glow of the gate we'd just come
out of. It was a million times better than the world we'd
just left, no matter what ambushes it turned out to have,
but that wasn't the best thing about it.

The best thing about it was the big, black cat-shape
sitting not far from the gate, looking at me calmly with
unblinking, blazing red eyes.

CHAPTER  10

When I banished our camp and we set off on the trait
again, the yellow sky above us was still very near sun-
down. It hadn't changed at all in the time we'd been there,
and the world beneath it felt very empty of life. Even
InThig couldn't sense life, and it had been on that world
longer than we had.

Seeing the demon when we first arrived apparently gave
me the ability to fly. 1 must have gotten to it without
stepping once on the ground between us, and then I'd been
down on my knees with my arms thrown around its neck.
If it were possible to strangle a demon I would have <;nded
InThig right there, but its initially startled purr continued
on and on, and a low, pleased growl kept assuring me it
was all right. It hadn't been able to use the gate to get
through to the world we'd entered, so it had spent the
intervening time going around through other worlds that
brought it to the yellow one by a different route-

"But how did you know that this was the next world the
trail would lead us to?" I'd asked, completely confused.
"Or that this was me gate we'd be coming through?"

"Laciel, there are only so many worlds each world
leads to," InThig had reminded me, a definite satisfac-
tion in its tone. "Every gate leading to a world has a
diagram of sorts that demons have learned to read, and that
diagram indicates the worlds that are reachable through
each world the gate opens on. I took an alternate route to

1-7^

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

the one you six did, one that let me reach most of the
worlds your route did, and began checking gales. When I
found this one I picked up the—scent, I suppose you might
call it—of the one who has been carrying the balance stone
through the worlds, and knew by that that this was the gate
you'd be coming through. I must say it certainly took you
long enough,"

"But—a search like that would take forever," I'd pro-
tested, only partially understanding what I'd been told. "To
check every gate on a world? InThig, it isn't possible to do
something like that!"

"For demons it's more than possible," it had answered
smugly, licking at one paw. "For us it's downright easy.
We don't have to constrain ourselves to the same use of
time and distance that humans do. Or speed, if you want to
go into details. And would you mind my asking why
you're all standing there soaking wet?"

"We were in need of baths, but we had to settle for
showers," I answered, blinking in surprise at having for-
gotten what state we were in. "I'll make camp for us in a
minute, but I still have one more question for you: why
weren't you able to go through the gate we did? We all
thought those things had killed*-you."

"Hardly," it answered with a sniff, dismissing the hor-
rors that had sent us racing through the gate. "i tore up a
few of them and entered the gate, and then discovered that
I couldn't follow you through to that world. There's
a—barrier of sorts that prevents us from entering certain
worlds, a barrier we can get through if we really try, but
even considering trying isn't very intelligent. The worlds
behind the barriers usually mean the end of existence for
my sort of life, or a madness that can never be recovered
from. Some of us have seen a few of those worlds by
reaching them through a special entry, but the area around
the entry must be protected by one of the Sighted or the
madness takes us- If the protection is breached, we've
even been known to turn on the Sighted who helped us
through me entry."

With my hand on InThig's shoulder I'd been able to feet
it shudder, so I'd dropped the subject and hadn't brought it

278

SHARON GREEN

up again. I'd heard stories once about that sort of thing,
but I hadn't really believed them—then-
Right after that I'd set up camp, and once the horses
were seen to, we all went to our pavilions to dry off, eat
and rest. I'd made sure to include bathtubs filled with hot
water in my spell, and that was the first place I'd gone to.
During the bath and the following meal I'd told InThig
something about what had happened to us on that blind
world, and then I'd gotten into bed and pulled the covers
up, intending to lie there only for a short while. The short
while had become a long while, and if anyone had dropped
by to visit, I never knew about it.

We'd started our new "day" in the same place that
we'd left it, learning from InThig that the time hadn't
seemed much earlier or much different even when if had
gotten there. The world still felt empty, and we rode for
hours without seeing a single tree—and without being
attacked even once. There was nothing but the short,
unending yellow grass and the darkening yellow sky, and
even the climate seemed without life. It was neither too
hot nor too cold, no wind to speak of, no sunshine, rain,
snow or storms, nothing but sameness. When I'd gotten up
that "morning" I'd recreated my lost clothing, and then
had returned Rik's shirt with a polite thank-you. He was
wearing it again during the ride, but he needed it less than
he had on the previous world.

By the time we stopped for a meal, the others were
trying to decide how they should be feeling. They were
glad not to have to beat off attacks every five or ten
minutes, but that meant the first attack was stilt ahead of
them—at an unknown place and time. The world we rode
through was too quiet, too monotonous, too easy; there
had to be a catch in it somewhere, and everyone was
worrying what that catch might be. I thought I knew what
it was, but saying anything just then didn't seem like a
good idea. If I was wrong it would put them off their
guard—and give them a lot more to worry about.

"Good meal for a lunch stop," Su said, bringing me out
of my thoughts when she sat down next to me on the
ground. "Liked these meat pies a lot, back at the fair.
Something bothering you?"

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

279

"I was just considering the benefits in being wrong," I
told her with a smile, watching her brush crumbs from her
hands. "1 suppose it's a matter of timing, just like every-
thing else. If you can manage to be wrong at the right
time, life becomes a lot easier."

"You sure didn't pick the right time in that fight," she
said, not quite returning my smile. "What did Rik do to
you once he got you out?"

"What did he do to me?" I echoed, not quite under-
standing the question. "He didn't do anything. I told
everyone about it this morning, just before we left camp.
Once we got out of the city we spent the day in the barn,
and then we went to meet you four. Two search parties
stopped outside the bam and two or three others went by
fairly close, so we spent most of the time hiding- What
made you think he did anything to me?"

"Never saw a man madder than Rik when he and the
others came to tell us you'd been taken," she answered,
still looking at me strangely. "Swore he'd beat you good
and proper when he got you back. and you've been avoid-
ing him the whole morning's ride. He didn't hurt you, did
he?"

"No, he didn't hurt me," I answered, looking down at
my hands while trying to think of'what else I could say.
Telling the truth would be too embarrassing for Rik, but I
couldn't seem to think of a lie. And then it came to me
that there was one piece of the truth that should be told, no
matter what else was or wasn't spoken about.

"Su, do you or any of the others know why Rik was
made leader of our expedition?" I asked, looking up at her
again. "And I mean the real reason, not the excuses that
he's bigger and stronger than 1 am, has more experience
leading than the rest of us, or anything like that. Was I the
only one who didn't know?"

"Nobody told me any different," she answered with a
frown, the strange look fading from her eyes. "What
makes you think it's anything else?"

"He told me yesterday what the real reason is, and it's
been bothering me ever since," I said, wishing I were
telling a lie instead of the truth. "Graythor made him
leader because he's the only one of us not absolutely

280 SHARON GREEN

necessary to the quest—and therefore the one meant to die
if that's what it takes to keep the rest of us alive. If there's
real danger in something he's the one who does it, because
he's the one who gets to say who does what. That's what
he told me, and I believe him."

"Don't think I like the way that sounds," she said, the
frown even more evident. "The rest of us get to live
because he was sent along with us to do the dying? Don't
it bother him that it's unfair?"

"He thinks it's necessary for the quest, and better that
one life is lost than millions," I told her. "I want to save
those millions, too, but not by simply handing over some-
one else's life. None of us came on this quest expecting it
to be safe, and I mink if we share the danger equally we
can all survive, not just some of us."

"Now that sounds like something I can live with," she
said with a nod, straightening where she sat. "And we
ought to tell the others."

"Would you do that?" I asked, feeling considerably
better than I had just a few minutes earlier. "I haven't had
any of those meat pies yet, and I'd like to have some
before we get moving again."

"No problem," she said, rising to her feet and heading
resolutely to where Zail, Dranna and Kadrim all sat to-
gether. 1 rose, too, but went instead to the food I had
created, this time with an appetite that hadn't been around
sooner.

I was just finishing up a second pie, ready to wash it
down with ale, when mere was something of a distraction.
Rik had eaten alone and then gone to his horse to look it
over, with InThig discussing that world beside him, but
enough of his attention had left that discussion to notice
the second one going on. I'd kept an eye on the four
people discussing our mutual problem and had seen how
indignant Zail and Kadrim had grown, Dranna more shocked
than anything else, and apparently I hadn't been alone in
seeing it. Rik left his horse with InThig padding along
beside him, and walked over to the group.

"What's wrong?" he asked, looking from one to the
other of them. "You all look as if you've just discovered
we're about to be attacked."

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        28l

"Nothing that simple," Zail answered, still looking
outraged. "But at least 1 know now why all that scouting
became your job."

"And why you kept yelling at poor Laciel every time
she tried to do something herself," Dranna put in, making
it sound like a personal insult. "We won't stand for it. you
know."

"Indeed," Kadrim said from where he sat beside Su,
his blue eyes harder than usual. "For one to bear the
burdens of all is not a thing a true man will accept."

"What are you all talking about?" Rik demanded, his
confusion echoed less strongly in InThig. "What aren't
you going to stand for or accept?"

"We don't like the idea that you mean to die for us,"
Su said, surprising him by speaking up that way. "We
decided seven's a luckier number than six, and we're
going to need all the iuck we can get. If all of us don't
make it, none of us will."

"This is ridiculous," Rik said when the othe'-s nodded
their agreement with Su, too involved to notice how pleased
InThig was at being numbered one of the group. "Who
told you 1 was supposed to— Laciel!"

His head turned to me when "he said my name, and those
bronze eyes weren't glowing with" anything like pleasure.
He looked as though he'd caught me reading his secret
diary, which was definitely ridiculous.

"I think I can go along with that," 1 told him pleas-
antly, just as though he'd been asking my opinion. "If all
of us don't make it, none of us will."

"That isn't the way the wizard said it had to be done,"
he responded with what was almost a growl, then included
the others in with his glare. "You're all missing the point
of this—which is the recovery of the balance stone. What's
one life balanced against millions?"

"What's six or seven lives balanced against millions?"
I countered as I stood, not about to let him get away with
nonsense like that. "After all, Graythor also said it was
imperative that we don't separate. And as the only real
representative of the people in question, I have to tell you
that they won't tike me idea of someone throwing his life
away in their name. If one of us happens to die trying to

282 SHARON GREEN

save them, that's a different story; they'll honor that per-
son as one of true courage, someone who tried to help
them and died for it. But someone who simply gave up his
life? How do you repay a debt like that? How do you tell
that person how arrogant a sacrifice that is, and how
demeaning it is to the people involved? It would put them
in your debt forever, and free men and women don't want
to be in someone's debt forever."

"You can't speak for them any more than you can speak
for me," he answered, his entire manner stiff and of-
fended. "A man has the right to decide what to do with his
life, especially if he isn't looking for anyone's thanks. And
1 still happen to be leader of this group, so the rest of you
can make all the decisions you like. Whether or not they're
carried out is my choice, and I say things will go on just
the way they were. Now, get to your feet and back to your
horses. Lunch time is over."

Zail and Kadrim had risen to their feet, but when they
didn't even try to argue with him I knew he'd used Persua-
sion on them to end the discussion. He left their group and
walked over to me, and the way he looked down at me
should have melted me where 1 stood.

"Is mat the reason you think you're along on this
quest?" he asked with that continuing growl. "To make
trouble any time the enemy doesn't? The next time you're
feeling bored, let me know about it first. We can pass the
time by taking care of that paddling I still owe you. Now
see if you can mind your own business long enough to get
on your horse."

With that he stomped away from me toward his own
horse, and it was all I could do to keep from creating
something invisible in his path for him to trip over. He
was absolutely hateful, and I was glad he didn't really love
me.

"Looks to me like he's trying to make us not care about
him," Su said from behind my right shoulder, and I turned
to see her standing there with the others. "There's some-
thing about him that makes us do what he says, but up till
now he never nibbed our noses in it. What are we going to
do?"

"We shall do as we earlier decided," Kadrim told her,

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER       283

he, like the others, staring at Rik's retreating back. "We
have no recourse save to obey his commands when he
speaks to us in such a manner, yet must we continue to
seek a safe path about the pitfall till one is discovered."

"Laciel doesn't have to obey him," another voice put
in, and we all looked down to see that InThig had joined
us. "If he continues acting so foolishly, she'll have to be
the one to keep him safe. He's more essential to this quest
man he realizes, and we can't afford to lose him."

"Let me know when we can afford to lose him," I said,
a comment the others chuckled at as they began to move
toward the horses. "After what he said to me, I'm looking
forward to the time,"

"I hope that's not the only time you're looking forward
to," Zail said very softly as he passed me, his hand on
Dranna's arm. When I looked at him he winked, then
continued on without saying anything else. 1 waited to feel
the thrill I had the other times he had spoken to me
privately, but for some reason it didn't come, and men I
realized something 1 hadn't expected: I no longer felt about
Zail the way 1 had, and wanted nothing to do with his
"exchanging of gifts." I didn't know what had happened
to make things so different, bur'there was something more
important I didn't know: how was! going to keep Zail at
arm's length without letting Rik see me doing it? That
spell wasn't likely to keep Rik annoyed with me for long,
and I didn't want the quest disrupted by a fight between
him and Zail.

"That frown seems weightier than it should," InThig
observed, the only one who hadn't already walked away.
"Is there anything disturbing you that / might help with?"

"InThig!" I exclaimed low, suddenly seeing the way
out I needed. "There certainly is something you can help
me with, and it will only take a moment to explain."

I spoke to the demon quickly, outlining the sort of help I
needed, then hurried to my horse when the others began
moving impatiently in their saddles and Rik had started
over to yell at me again. I told them all that InThig and 1
had had to confer on something to do with magic, and
although they all accepted the statement without question,

284 SHARON GREEN

there was a black demon who didn't stop grinning very
widely for quite some time.

We continued our ride across the dull, yellow world,
and nothing happened to change that dullness. Mile after
mile passed beneath our horses' hooves, and then Su
began to slow down. I'd already Seen the glowing slit not
very far ahead, but as we rode up to it, I saw something
else as well. A colorless bubble floated beside the gate,
perfectly round and about the size of a head, all the colors
of the rainbow reflecting from it despite the lack of very
bright light. Someone had left a message sphere for us,
and for a moment I had the ridiculous idea that that
someone was the enemy, but then the sphere detected my
presence and a face formed in it.

"Thank the EverNameless that you've made it this far,"
Graythor's giant-voice said, his white-bearded face smiling
with relief. "I can't communicate with you directly, but
when you triggered this message sphere, a signal was sent
to me. I won't be able to speak with you, but I'll know
that you're there."

We had all approached the sphere and stopped, but it
wasn't able to detect anyone other than me. For that reason
Graythor's eyes were on me alone, and his words also
addressed the same.

*'I don't know the details of what you've gone through
until now, but this is the point you must brace your-
selves," he said, his expression now somber and his eyes
filled with upset. "Laciel, you, especially, must be very
alert now, and you must also give the others some idea of
what to expect. You'll have to leave the horses there,
beside the gate, or you'll surely lose them, if not immedi-
ately then eventually. I'll use the link of this message
sphere to maintain whatever you create to sustain them
until your return. Stay together and trust no one other than
your quest companions, for everyone and everything else
will be your enemy. I'm sure you've been behaving your-
self, Laciel child, and bearing in mind the fact that Rikkan
Addis is leader of the expedition. Please continue to do so.
Go carefully and safely, each and every one of you,
knowing that my hopes and blessings go with you."

His white-bearded face smiled with true warmth just

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        285

before it disappeared, and then the bubble silently burst,
leaving only the link-shadow of itself. That was what
communication spheres usually did once they'd delivered
their messages and I was expecting it, but the quiet explo-
sion startled some of the others. It did not, however,
startle the one who could have used startling the most.

"Behaving yourself and bearing in mind that Rikkan
Addis is leader of the expedition," a calmly satisfied voice
quoted from my left. "You're not doing very well with the
first part of that, but I'll see to it that you're welt reminded
of the second- What's the danger ahead that we have to be
on the lookout for?"

It was Rik who was sitting beside me, of course, look-
ing as though every one of his opinions had been vindi-
cated. The others were looking as frustrated as I felt, but
Rikkan Addis wasn't going to get away with killing him-
self if/ had anything to say about it!

"It's not simply danger," I said, answering only his
question as 1 began to dismount- "So far we've been
moving through worlds that allow magic but are predomi-
nantly run and populated by the untalented. Once we go
through that gate, though, we'll be moving through and
toward worlds that are dominated by and based on magic.
If you thought we had it bad on a world where I was
magically blind, wait until we get to the ones where almost
everyone can See."

"You sound as though you're familiar with those worlds,"
he mused, automatically following my example by dis-
mounting. "Why can't we take me horses through them?"

"Because some of those worlds don't have anything like
horses, or anything horses can eat," I said, leaving my
gray where he stood and moving farther to the left of the
gate. "I can create pasturage for them on a world like this,
where everything isn't under a spell or already created by a
spell, but there will be places I simply won't be able to do
it. And no, I'm not familiar with those worlds. I've just
heard stories."

I'd been looking more at me landscape than I had at
him, and when I finished answering his question I spoke
the spell that created the horses' pasture. Good green
grass, fresh water, a self-renewing oat bin, shelter—and its

286

SHARON GREEN

own cycle of day and night. I'd been right in thinking
we'd come through to a margin world, and it was so far
out there was no knowing what its period of rotation was. I
turned away from the newly-made pasture to get my gray,
and nearly ran into Rik, who was standing right behind
me.

"Why don't you share a few of those stories with us?"
he suggested in a way that wasn't exactly a suggestion,
those bronze eyes looking down at me. "It might help us
to know what to expect."

"Believe me, hearing those stories would not be a
help," I told him, trying very hard to keep from shuddering.
"Magic users have it hard enough, but most of those
stories deal with the unSighted who had to go through
those worlds. And now that you mention it, it might be a
good idea if I went on alone from here. I can make the
camp self-sustaining the way 1 did with the pasture, and
you and the others could ..."

"Now that / mention it," he interrupted with a small
sound of ridicule, the expression in his eyes immediately
matching. "We stay here with our feet up, while you go
on alone. Why don't we ask for volunteers to see who's
willing to do that? Everyone who wants to stay here safe
and snug raise a hand."

Rather than raising a hand he folded his arms, and
didn't even bother turning around to look at the others;

They'd all dismounted and were standing by their horses,
and only Dranna appeared as though she wished she had a
reason to volunteer. The others were wearing the same
expression Rik was, the same expression they'd been look-
ing at him with earlier, and that let me know 1 was wasting
my time.

"Don't say later I didn't warn you," I told them with a
shrug, walking around Rik to get to my gray. The com-
ment was designed to give them uneasy second thoughts,
but some people just aren't capable of interpreting mean-
ingful hints.

"As a matter of fact you aren't warning us," Rik
commented back, faint annoyance in the voice that fol-
lowed me to my horse. "All you've come up with so far is

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        287

a vague mention of 'stories'. What specifically happened
to those untalented people?"

"That's something we don't quite know," I said, look-
ing down at the leather reins in my hands rather than at the
group of people staring at me. "Most of the ones who were
brought back were hopelessly insane, people who couldn't
stop laughing, or crying, or screaming, or maybe all three.
Some were absolutely silent, lost somewhere within their
own minds, and even the ones who spoke weren't rational-
They babbled about beautiful illusions and terrifying reali-
ties, about dreaming while awake and touching the true
world in sleep, about being stalked and having had to do
stalking of their own, none of it detailed and little of it
repeated in any depth. Most of them had been taken by
different routes through the sector, but it was pretty much
the same sector they all traveled through. It's the sector
called the Far Side of Forever."

This time I was surrounded by silence as I led my gray
toward the pasture, and that silence continued through the
unsaddling and turning out of all of the horses. Dranna
stood with her arms wrapped around herself while Zail saw
to her mount, and I knew the pallor in her face had been
caused by what I'd said. Even people who are prepared to
die or go through Hellfire for a cause tend to hesitate when
it's madness they face, which is perfectly understandable.
When you're dead there are no two ways about it, but when
you're mad you might not know what you are.

"If there was no way to get through without going
insane, the wizard wouldn't have wasted his time sending
us," Rik said at last, obviously voicing the conclusion
he'd reached. "He also repeated the fact that we had to
stay together, so sending Lacie! on alone is out, even if we
hadn't already decided that. I think we can make it, no
matter what they try to throw at us."

By that time he was looking around at everyone, his
bronze eyes daring anyone to be silly enough to disagree
with him, and of course none of them could. His strong,
real belief was infecting them the way it had in Graythor's
house, and even Dranna was getting her color back. What
he believed they believed, and all I could do was hope
they weren't all kidding themselves.

288 SHARON GREEN

"I think it's time we used that gate now," he said to
me, the expedition leader giving a no-arguments order to
one of his followers. There was really very little choice in
what had to be done if they weren't going to be staying
behind after all, but Rikkan Addis was trying to reinforce
a point he thought Graythor had already made for him.

"Of course, Rik, anything you say,'* I agreed at once,
gesturing to Su and Kadrim to join me at the gate. As soon
as we were there and holding hands, I glanced over my
shoulder and added, "We're starting now, just the way
you wanted—0 beloved leader," then immediately stepped
into the gate with Su. I'd promised not to call him "fear-
less leader" and I'd keep that promise, but he'd find there
were a lot of variations to be used in place of that title.
That ought to keep him from constantly stressing what
Graythor had said, and also produced an unexpected side
effect.

That might have been the first time in the history of
gate-using that people passed through one laughing.

CHAPTER  1 1

Without the horses, passing through the gate took no time
at all. When Kadrim and I joined everyone else, we found
them gazing around at the new world we'd entered, a
world that looked more like an illustration in a child's
storybook than like a real world. The sky was very blue
and had neat white clouds pasted on it here and there, the
grass under our feet was very green, and a patch of flowers
a short way ahead and to the "right was colored in vivid
yellow, red and pink. Every color *in sight was bright and
intense, and there was no overlapping in the scene. Every-
thing had its own neat place, and nothing seemed prepared
to stray out of it.

"If this is what they mean to use to make us crazy, I'm
all for it," Dranna said as she looked around in delight,
taking a deep breath of perfumed air. "This is the first
world we've come to that hasn't scared the daylights out of
me."

"I'll say," Zail agreed with equally delighted enthusi-
asm from where he stood not far from Dranna. "Let's stop
and have a picnic."

"Perhaps taking a few moments of leisure would not be
entirely without benefit," Kadrim said, leaving me to walk
toward the others. "The time lost will be easily made up
in more hostile surroundings."

"Don't see why the trail can't wait a little while," Su
agreed with a glance for Kadrim as he stopped beside her,

290

SHARON GREEN

her own attention mostly on the landscape. "Hunting ought
to be great in these parts, and easy, too. Bet the deer all lie
down as soon as you get near them."

"Have all of you gone crazy?" Rik demanded of them,
the only one of the group who wasn't smiling. "We don't
have time to stop for a picnic, and you should all know
that. We'll stop to make camp at sundown the way we
usually do, and you can enjoy yourselves then. Right now
we have a trail to follow."                        ,

"Oh, don't be so stuffy, Rik," Dranna laughed, leaving
Zail to undulate toward the other man. "It's only early
morning here, so sundown's a long way off. If we stop for
a while now we can all have some fun, with the promise of
more to come later. Won't that be a great incentive for
moving on?"

She was standing in front of Rik by then, and when she
finished speaking she put her arms around his neck and
stood on her toes, at the same time pulling his head down
for her kiss. The others laughed at that, still delighted, but
since I knew what was really happening, there was no
reason for me to watch it. I turned away to look for
InThig, and found the demon seated only a few steps to
the right.

"My, my, Dranna must be stronger than she appears,"
it commented in a low voice when I walked over to. it, its
blazing red eyes staring past me to the left. "Rik seems to
be having trouble getting away from her, and can't stop
the way she's kissing him. She seems to be really enjoying
that kiss."

"That's because she really likes him," I told InThig,
feeling no urge to turn around and see it for myself. "And
I'm pretty sure he likes her quite a bit, too. He was very
concerned about her when we first started this journey. Do
you have any idea about what I can do to pull them out
from under this spell?''

"I've been considering the matter since we came
through," it said, moving those unblinking red eyes to me.
"This trap has caught us very much unawares, especially
since neither you nor I are affected by it. It's designed to
catch the unSighted and untalented, and seems to be a
general spell rather than specifically directed at our com-

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER       291

panions. I also believe I detect the approach of something,
most likely the something that created this trap. We have
some time before it arrives, but not an unlimited amount.
My goodness, Dranna is still kissing Rik. Perhaps you
ought to try it yourself, Laciel, to see what she Qnds so
compelling."

"Why would I want to know what kissing Rik is like?"
I asked, looking around to see if I could spot whatever was
coming to check on what had been caught in its trap.
"You know as well as I that he doesn't really like me, so
why would I try to embarrass him? Do you think it's the
coloring of the landscape that's affecting them, or is it the
air that's spelled?"

"Visual spells usually have a different appearance to
them," InThig said, almost musing aloud. "Also, if it
were visual you would probably be able to See through it
without half trying. All things considered, it seems more
likely that the air is at fault. . . . Laciel, about Rik and
what he feels toward you. Perhaps you should be told what
he said to me that night I stayed with him in his pavilion.
He doesn't . . ."

"Then all I have to do is change the air," I said, turning
away from InThig to close a^ subject I didn't care to
discuss. "At least I hope that's all! have to do."

Dranna was still holding tight to Rik. and even as I
watched he managed to disengage her, only to have her
come right back at him. He could force her away but
couldn't keep her like that without hurting her, and the
others all thought it was a riot. If my counterspell didn't
work, a riot would be the least of what we had, and nothing
that could be considered even remotely funny.

I raised my arms and spoke a brief spell, feeling a great
deal of surprise at the instant surge of power that accompa-
nied my effort. My talent seemed to be even stronger there
than it was on other worlds, and the air I'd demanded the
creation of formed immediately around all of us. I hadn't
changed the air around the gate, I'd surrounded us with
our own supply, a much easier thing to do and one that
had fast, gratifying results.

"Oh!" Dranna exclaimed while the laughter of our

2Q2 SHARON GREEN

other companions faltered, pushing herself quickly away
from Rik. "What am I doing?"

"That's what I was wondering," Rik said, eyeing her
strangely but with something like relief. "Are you all right
now?''

"Yes, I'm—fine," she answered, one hand to her breast
as she looked away from him, then she took herself hur-
riedly back to the others. She seemed to be very embar-
rassed over what had happened, and maybe even more
than embarrassed. What that more was I couldn't tell, but I
also didn't have me time to think about it.

"If anyone is, still in the mood for a picnic, I think you
should know that the ants are on their way," 1 announced,
drawing all their attention- "If we don't move on now, we
may not get another chance."

"I would know what occurred here," Kadrim said with
a frown, looking as if he had just awakened from a bad
dream. Su had her hands to her head and Zail was shaking
his while he comforted a trembling Dranna with one arm
around her shoulders, all four pairs of eyes filled with
confusion.

"This whole area is trapped to catch the untalented," I
told them, still looking around. "The spell wasn't set to
snare our expedition, it was designed for any unSighted
who happens to come through the gate. Since InThig says
the designer of the trap is on its way, do you mink we can
get going now and save the discussion for some other
time?"

"The trail is here," Su said quickly, leading off as soon
as she was sure everyone was following. InThig went from
sitting to running in an eyeblink, obviously intending to
keep Su company at point, and when I followed after
everyone else I discovered I had company to my left.

"I can't imagine what got into Dranna," Rik said as we
brought up the rear, this time sounding even more embar-
rassed than she had. "I hope you know I wasn't encourag-
ing her."

"Don't worry, Rik. everyone will understand it was the
spell," I reassured him, privately wondering just how
close the trap-setter was. "The others are too busy being
upset to laugh at you."

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

293

"I don't care about whether or not they laugh," he
said, this time sounding impatient. "I just want you to
know it wasn't my fault. 1 didn't go to her, she came to
me."

"Why shouldn't she go to you?" I asked, finally glanc-
ing up at him to see the vexation on his face. "She really
likes you, you know, and has for some time. You won't
hold it against her, will you? The way she acted under the
spell, I mean."

"Laciel, I—I mean, don't you—I mean—" His words
stumbled out as though they were trying to say something,
but he didn't seem able to get them to go that far. The look
in his bronze eyes was almost fierce, and then he shook his
head, dismissing it all. "Since that's all that's bothering
you, I might as well set your mind at ease," he said at
last. "There's nothing at all that I'll be holding against
Dranna."

He then strode away without looking at me again, and I
honestly didn't know why he seemed so angry. After a
minute I decided it had to do with me spell he was under,
so understanding wasn't worth pursuing, not when there
was something else I wanted to do, I was intent on trying
to forget how happy and satisfied Dranna had looked while
she was kissing Rik, and I didn't need anything distracting
me.

Su followed the trail through the very neat landscape,
but only for about ten minutes before the landscape changed.
The neat road began to angle downward, and between one
step and the next, as though we'd crossed an invisible
threshold, the storybook land was gone. Beyond it was a
gray-blue sky with a diffuse sun hidden somewhere in it,
slate-gray rocks and boulders decorating the ground below
scattered stone mesas and ranges, and red-gray soil sup-
porting sparse, clumpy, hungry-looking grass. There were
no roads or buildings or any signs of settlements or civili-
zation, but as inhospitable as the land felt, it also didn't
feel empty. We weren't alone on that world, but we were
all a lot happier not seeing any overt proof of the fact.

InThig dropped back briefly to tell me that we were no
longer being pursued by the trap-setter, and in fact hadn't

294

SHARON- GREEN

been since I'd caused us to be surrounded by our own air.
It had seemed to the demon that the trap-setter had hesi-
tated noticeably at that time, but it hadn't said anything
until it was sure. 1 listened to InThig's information without
comment, but once it had gone back to keeping Su com-
pany, it came to me that what had happened made sense.
The trap-setter was after those who were unSighted, and
didn't care to tangle with anyone who could break its
victims out of the trap. Someone below sorcerer .grade
might have been able to bring some unSighted through the
gate, but probably couldn't have gotten them out of the
trap. With the victims out, the trap-setter had chosen
prudence over pursuit.

"1 wonder if I might interrupt your thoughts for a short
while," a voice said from my right, and I looked up to see
that Kadrim had moved back to walk beside me. His big
hand rested on the hilt of the sword that hung between us,
and his blue eyes looked down at me with their usual
calm.

"I wasn't deep in anything particularly earth-shattering,"
1 answered with a faint smile, taking my eyes from the
backs of the others as they trudged through me barren
landscape. "Was there something specific you wanted to
talk about?"

"Indeed," he said with a nod, but without returning my
smile. "I wished to speak with you as a friend, and
perhaps also as the father I sometimes feel myself to be to
you. Will you accept my words in such a way, and under-
stand that I do not speak merely to give you hurt?"

"Welt, you've been right in everything you've told me
so far," I said, wondering why he was looking so somber.
"If you want to speak as a friend, that's the way 1*11
listen."

"Good," he said with another nod, and his eyes wanned
even if he still wasn't smiling. "1 hesitated to say this to
you, not only for the pain I knew it would bring, but also
in fear that you would think I lied and our friendship
would be no more. 1 pondered the matter a short while,
and then understood that it was necessary for you to be
told no matter the cost. Girl—while we awaited your

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

295

return from that city from which Rik took you—Zail—
passed the time—in company with Dranna."

I was about to ask how Zail could have avoided being in
Dranna's company without leaving the group—and then I
understood what Kadrim meant. Zail hadn't just been near
her, he'd done considerably more, and I didn't know what
to say. Hearing about it embarrassed me a little, but aside
from that it didn't seem to be the end of the worlds. I
continued to hesitate, wondering how you said something
like that without sounding awkward and maybe even heart-
less, and Kadrim misinterpreted my silence.

"You must know that this may not indicate what it
appears to," he said quickly, putting a supporting arm
around my shoulders. "In truth there are those men who
speak of giving all they possess to the woman in their
arms, even unto their names, yet have interest only in
taking rather than giving. 1 had thought Zaii to be one such
as that, yet may it be no more than a matter of the needs of
a man. Some men may wish to be true to the woman of
their choice, yet do their bodies drive them to seek other
women when their own is unavailable. Zail may indeed
possess deep feeling for you, yet did I deem it necessary
that you know that facet of his^nature. Should you accept
his petition, you must know what it is you accept."

"And now, thanks to you, I do know," 1 said, looking
up at my friend with a smile. "I promise to think about it
very carefully before I do anything permanent to commit
myself, which I probably won't do anyway, at least until
this quest is over. But I would like to ask a favor: if you
haven't said anything to anyone about this, please keep it
dial way. If anyone found out, I think I'd feel rather—
foolish."

"1 have not spoken, and now give my word that I shall
not," he answered, this time adding the smile that had
been missing. "Su became aware of the situation as I did,
yet have I learned that she is one who will say nothing
under any circumstances. It pleases me that you have taken
mis so well, and now I may continue our journey with a
lighter heart."

He took his arm back with the relief he had mentioned,

296

SHARON GREEN

and we walked on together in silence. I didn't want him to
know that 1 felt just as relieved, now that I knew I wouldn't
be hurting Zail by refusing him once the quest was over.
He probably wouldn't have been hurt long, only until the
spell was canceled, but I still felt better about it.

It took less than an hour for us to reach the next gate,
and the world beyond it had a deep purple sky and a red
sun, cliffs of granite that rose high toward that sun, and
numberless cave mouths breaking into those cliffs. The.
world's inhabitants became clearly visible very quickly,
blocking the trail that Su had begun following again as
soon as Kadrim and I stepped out of the gate. They
appeared to be some sort of cross between animals and
insects, covered in fur of every color there was, mouths
full of fangs that literally dripped drool all over them, eyes
multi-faceted and gleaming with a chilling kind of delight.
Most of them were twelve or fifteen feet tall, and when the
four armed members of our party immediately drew their
swords, one big specimen in front laughed louder man the
rest.

"You think mem little stickers gonna do somethin' to
us?" it bellowed happily, staring down at a group that had
gone pale at the sudden appearance of the giant upright
monsters. "Maybe a demon c'n get you through a gate,
but it can't do nothin* to make those toothpicks hurt us.
They told us to watch out fer you an' t'be real careful, but
I don* see no reason t'be careful. All you folks look is good
feat."

"Maybe you'd better take another look," Rik said,
stepping out in front of Su with his sword tight in his fist.
"We won't be going down without taking more than a fair
share of you with us, so why not play it smart and just step
out of our way? Take any other option, and you'll end up
regretting it."

"You ain't gonna make nobody regret nothin*. Shifter,"
me blue-furred spokesman grinned, showing even more in
the way of teeth while its giant bands opened and closed in
eager anticipation. "The on'y thing that ain't to my iikin*
is how puny you are, no more'n a couple o* bites each.
Never did like gettin* no better'n a taste."

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

"And how puny do / look to you?" 1 asked, pushing
my way gently to the front of our group to look up at the
spokesman. Rik immediately put his free arm up to keep
me from passing him. an idiotic gesture if I ever saw one,
but there was really no need to pass him. I could See the
beast clearly from where I was, and glittering, faceted eyes
showed that me ease of inspection was mutual.

"You?" the thing asked with another laugh, but one mat
was the least bit less sure of itself- "You ain't even as big
as he is. Why would I mink you looked any different?"

"Oh, I don't know. just a silly, girlish fancy on my
part, I guess," I answered in a drawl, then raised my left
hand palm down and said, "Sph'eer-it." Again I could
feel that great surge of power, and when I began lowering
my hand, the size of the spokesman lowered with it, one
foot of his height and heft for every inch my hand moved.
There was a groaning mutter and a slight backing away of
the monsters behind the first as I shrank my victim down
to about four and a half feet, and then added, "See
anything different about me yet?"

"Okay, okay, you've made your point," the thing grum-
bled as it looked up at me, its voice if not its complexion a
good deal more on the pale" side. "We thought it was
strange for a group of unSightefl to travel alone with a
demon, but what the hell, it was worth trying for them. If
we'd known there was a wizard with them, you never
would have seen us."

"Sorceress, not wizard," I corrected, looking at the
tiling in curiosity. "And why is your grammar so suddenly
unproved? My spell didn't even come close to covering
that."

"We've learned from experience that the thicker we
sound, me faster our—visitors—give up their weapons,"
(he creature said, glancing uneasily toward Rik. "They're
usually too frightened to do us much damage, but every
now and again there's one— Look, friend, that crack 1
made wasn't really meant in a derogatory way, and once 1
was really good friends with a Shifter before I—ah—
ended the friendship. No hard feelings, huh?"

The look Rik gave the creature couldn't be described as

SHARON GREEN

anything less than pure disgust, and the now-small creature
winced at the impact of those bronze eyes, then turned to
me again.

"Really, do you think we can forget about this?" he
asked anxiously, his fangs now almost dry. "We have a
firm policy of nonintervention where the Sighted are con-
cerned, which is undoubtedly why we were given that
misinformation. We'd like to go back to what we were
doing—if you don't mind?"

"I haven't yet decided whether I mind or not," I said,
making sure I didn't blink as I stared at him. "What other
surprise visits are waiting for us between here and the next
nearest gate? Or between here and the gate used by your
misinformants?"

"How would I know?" the thing asked plaintively, then
gasped when 1 lowered my hand again just a little. "Okay,
okay, my memory is suddenly clearing. A couple of just-in-
case ambushes, some defensive boulders ready to come
down off the cliffs, easy stuff, nothing you'd have any
trouble with. They said they wanted us to make sure. but
we never expected you to get past us, so why would we
have gotten fancy on backups? I'll be glad to tell you all
about it—show you, I mean. show you! Please don't lower
that hand any more! If it's a guide you want, it's a guide
you've got!"

"How good of you to offer," I said with something of a
smile, gesturing a temporary halt to his shrinkage. "The
rest of your people can run along now, but if we happen to
see them again, you're the one who'll be in trouble. Does
everyone understand that?"

"They understand," the creature answered, watching
enviously as the others took hasty leave from the vicinity.
"I told you we know better than to mess with wizards, and
I wasn't joking. All right, all right, sorceress, not wizard.
Have it any way you like. Who's leading out?"

I turned my head and nodded to Su, who gave me a
brief smile before taking up the lead again. The creature
followed dejectedly after her, complaining that she was
walking too fast, and we moved out after him.

"They were really afraid of you, Laciei," Dranna ex-

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

claimed in a low voice from my left, hurrying to keep up
while looking nervously all around. "They seemed even
more afraid than those soldiers you chased away from the
gate we wanted to use, and I don't understand why."

"They were more afraid because they have a fairly
thorough understanding of magic," I toid her, keeping one
eye on the creature ahead of us, "When it's only the
unknown you're afraid of, there's a limit to how much fear
you can feel before your mind says. 'What the hell are you
running from?' On me other hand, when you know in
detail just what there is to be afraid of, you become very
anxious not to get involved. They all know what I can do
to mem, and don't want any part of it."

"I hadn't consciously noticed it before, but when you're
using magic you're a good deal more mature," Zail put in
from Dranna's left, his handsome face thoughtful. "You're
also much more self-possessed, and ruthless when you
have to be ruthless."

"Creatures like these don't respond to pretty-pleases or
bluffing," I explained with a faint smile. "You have to
prove to them that you're capable of squashing them flat
and also willing to do it, or they'll walk all over you. It
isn't much different from leading a street pack."

"Now do I begin to see me reason behind your claim
that magic users are most often expedition leaders," Kadrim
said from his place behind Dranna and Zail. "Your mas-
tery of the situation was true mastery, and clearly kept us
from grievous harm. I salute your ability, Laciel my
friend."

His smile, like his words, was open and warm, causing
Dranna and Zail to echo the sentiments, and then Dranna
made a sound of surprise.

"Now what do you suppose is wrong with him?" she
asked, and I turned my head back to see Rik striding away
from us through the ground boulders in an effort to catch
up to Su and the creature, who were about ten feet ahead.
He hadn't said a word, and I didn't understand what was
wrong any more than Dranna did.

"Looks to me like Rik's crown of leadership is begin-
ning to pinch a little," Zail said with a chuckle that wasn't
the friendliest sound I'd ever heard. "Our fearless leader

SHARON GREEN

300

didn't get very far bailing us out of that mess back there,
but Laciel handled it without any trouble. I think he's
afraid that if it happens again, he'll be out of a job even
with the wizard behind him. The wizard's a long distance
off, but Laciel's right here."

"But I didn't do that on purpose to make him look
bad," I protested, suddenly realizing that that had to be
what it had looked like to him. "These are the worlds of
magic, and I'm supposed to protect the group."

"And a very fine job you're doing, too," Zail assured
me, smiling at me mostly with those gray eyes. "We'll
have to find a very special reward for such fine work. I'll

talk to you about it later."

I'm sure there was something significant in his gaze at
that, but I was really too upset to notice. Rik was walking
ahead with Su and the creature, his back stiff with silent
anger, and I knew I'd have to try to make him see the
truth. For some reason I didn't much care about the leader-
ship any more, except for having wanted to tease Rik
about it. It was probably that I had decided to respect
Graythor's wishes, but had just been a little annoyed at the
way Rik had stressed the point. 1 hadn't been trying to
replace him as leader, and letting him know that was only

fair.

Su followed the trail that led between the cliffs, and at
three separate points the creature stopped her an4 walked
forward a couple of steps to wave his arm in a signal of
sorts. At the first point he seemed rather nervous, but
apparently his people wanted to get him back more than
they wanted to see us stopped. None of them showed
themselves again and nothing unexpected happened, and
another half-hour's walking brought us to the next gate. 1
restored the creature to his original size. but none of us
stood around watching him hurry back the way we'd
come. We formed our chain and passed through the gate,
and most of us were glad we'd left the horses behind. If
the distance between gates continued to be so short, the
horses would have quickly become more burden than aid.

The next world was green and murky and seemed to be
made up of swamp mud, and the insects weren't the only
things that seemed to be interested in eating us. Rather

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        301

man take any chances I created three shielded discs with
handrails, and we floated over the mud and through the
green murk with things reaching for us but not connecting.
I'd intended sharing a disc with Rik so that I could talk to
him, but he'd immediately climbed onto Su's disc, and
that was that. Kadrim shared my disc with Zaii and Dranna
sharing the third, and InThig changed itself to black vapor
to keep the slimy mud off its feet.

By the time we reached the next gate, I had to admit
that I needed a rest. Day and night were no longer matching
up very well, and we'd been on me move for quite some
time. If we*d still had the horses, I might have been willing
to try putting one or two more worlds behind us, but
walking on top of the energy I'd been expending was just a
little too much. I couldn't afford to use up everything
when our lives depended on how strong 1 was, so when we
stepped off the discs onto the rise of solid ground the gate
stood on, I made my way over to Rik.

"Once we're through the gate I'd like to set up camp,"
I told him, very aware of the way he kept looking around
at the green murkiness rather than at me. "I'm really
getting tired, so I think we'd better stop for a while."

"Why tell me?" he asked ift a very uninterested voice,
his gaze still touching everything else. "You've been trying
from the start to make yourself expedition leader, and now
it looks like you're just about there. Why hesitate when the
prize is nearly yours?"

"I'm not hesitating!" I protested, more upset than I'd
expected to be. "I'm not trying to be expedition leader,
I'm just trying to do what I'm supposed to do! Graythor
say) you're leader, and I'd never . . ."

"Never try showing me up in spite of that?" he inter-
rupted with a bitter laugh. "Don't you think you're a little
late with those noble sentiments? I've never worried about
facing anyone head on in a dispute, but back-stabbing puts
me out of my league. You really know how to go after a
man when he's least expecting it, don't you? I don't like
fighting under a set of rules like that, so it's all yours. You
wanted it badly enough to try for it without caring what
you had to do to get it, so why drag your feet now? Go
ahead and take it."

302 SHARON GREEN

With that he simply walked away from me, not once
having bothered even to glance at me. The others were
gathered around the gate, waiting for our conversation to
be over, none of them apparently having heard a word of
the exchange. I joined them woodenly, too numb to think
about what had happened, and we all went through the
gate.

We entered the next world in the middle of a blinding
snowstorm, nothing around us but furiously blowing white
and agonizing cold. I lost no time in creating our camp,
made sure Su's longer exposure to the storm would cause
her no harm, then slogged through the drifts to my pavil-
ion. I'd warded our camp to make sure nothing was able to
gel to us, but 1 hadn't pushed the snowstorm away; even in
a small camp like that, people would find it easier staying
inside than wandering around visiting.

By the time I got to the warmth, I was already chilled to
the bone. 1 thought briefly about drying my clothes with
magic, but 1 really was too dred and it was totally unnec-
essary. There was a nice, warm, thick robe waiting for me
to get out of ice-tinged sogginess, and once I had it on I
sat down on the gray settle with my feet beside me under
me robe. The nice thing about a magic pavilion is that it
doesn't let any of the cold in, not even when a demon
pushes through the entrance silk.

"I must say snow is much preferable to slime." InThig
announced, obviously pleased to be back in its cat shape.
"The only problem was, that storm nearly blew me apart
before I could solidify again. Why in the world didn't you
block it out of camp?"

"I thought I'd save you the job of keeping visitors away
from my door," 1 said with a shrug, vaguely wondering
why InThig's fur wasn't wet even a little. "I'm going to
have something to eat, and then I'm going straight to
bed."

"In mat case, perhaps I can make use of your time of
rest," it said, red eyes looking thoughtful. "If you're sure
you won't be needing me, I'll scout around beyond the
camp, just to see what might be waiting for us. I won't be
gone more than a few hours."

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

303

"That's a good idea," I said, really meaning it. "It's
sure to save us time and trouble in the morning. Or
whenever we decide it's morning."

"If this storm keeps up, we won't know the differ-
ence," it agreed, turning again toward the entrance silk. hi
another moment it was gone, and then there was nothing to
take my attention but what had been said to me before we
entered me gate-

Back-stabbing is out of my league, he'd said, meaning
that that's what he thought I'd done to him. Back-stabbing,
sneaking up from behind, taking advantage of him when
he wasn't expecting it. I reached up to close the robe more
tightly at my throat, not understanding why he hadn't
believed me when I'd said I hadn't been trying to take the
leadership from him. Was that the way he saw me, as a
liar, and a sneak, and something that disgusted him more
than the creature who had tried to apologize for insulting
him when it no longer had the upper hand? I'd known he
didn't like me, but apparently his dislike had grown so
strong that it was even overcoming the spell he was under.

It looked like he didn't just dislike me, he hated me-

1 lay down on the settle with my hands still holding the
robe closed, happier than ever that I hadn't been silly
enough to fall in love with him." It doesn't pay to love
people who hate you, all it does is get you kicked out into
the street where they don't have to look at you anymore.
His gentleness and kindness had been because of the spell,
not because he really liked me; when his disgust had let
him overcome the spelt, he'd shown how he really felt. If
I'd been silly enough to fall in love with him, what he'd
said would have hurt quite a lot, but I didn't love him. I
felt sorry for him because of the spell he was under, but I
didn't love him.

I lay unmoving on the settle for quite some time, my
mind too tired to chase the thoughts around any longer,
and then it came to me that I was still cold on the inside. I
wasn't very hungry but I felt the need for some warm
soup, me one dish that had best kept me going during the
years I'd been growing up. It's amazing how many things
you can make soup from, and if you get really desperate
you can even do without the vegetable peelings and dog-

SHARON GREEN

304

chewed meat bone. Wanned water with a pinch of coarse
salt is more than simply water, and I needed a little of it to
chase the cold away. After that, I might be able to sleep.

There was no soup among the dishes my camp-spell had
created, so I used a little strength and made some, then sat
down at my table to eat it. The plain, clear, yellow broth
was a good deal tastier than what I'd grown up on, and it
was exactly what I needed. I ate it without thinking about
anything but how good it was, and was almost through
when I heard a throat-clearing sound near my pavilion
entrance that caused me to look up. Standing there in a
tracked-in pool of melting water was Rik, his wetly-
glistening hair and clothes showing signs of the storm he'd
just passed through.

"I—hope I'm not disturbing your meal," he said, a
self-conscious gesture indicating the bowl my spoon still
hovered over. "I—just came to apologize for what I said
to you earlier. For a minute there 1 thought I'd lost all our
lives by not being able to handle the situation, and instead
of being relieved when you did it, I just got mad. I've
never been in a situation before where I couldn't take care
of myself and everyone else with me, and feeling that
helpless just made something—snap. It took me a while to
understand that you were just doing what you're here to
do, and I was a damned fool to see it any other ^vay.
I'm—also not used to being jealous, which seems to make
you imagine things that aren't there. Are you willing to
accept my apology?"

This time those bronze eyes were directly on me, with
even more hesitation showing than his speech had had. I
could see that the spell was in control of him again, and I
really did feel sorry for him. He'd be very embarrassed
once the spell was gone for good, and there was no need to
make it any worse.

"You don't have to apologize to me," 1 said, turning
back to what was left of my soup. "I can understand that
you were upset, and it really doesn't matter. At this point 1
can't even remember what you said, so why make a fuss
about it? And being jealous of me is a waste of time. I
may have the talent to do magic, but I won't be using that

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

305

talent to become expedition leader. I stopped wanting that
job quite a number of worlds ago."

"But I'm not jealous of your talent," he said with what
sounded like a small, incredulous laugh as I sipped at my
soup. "Laciel—don't you understand that what's driving
me crazy is the fact that we found something very special
together, but now you won't even look at me? I keep
telling myself that you're entitled to make your own choice
in a man, but something inside won't let me accept that!
Damn it, I'm the man for you, no matter how much more
money Zail has than I do! Or how important his family is!
From now on I'm going to spend my rime proving it,
starting with tonight. You said you were tired, so let's go
to bed."

I nearly dropped my spoon as I quickly turned my head
back to him, but I wasn't mistaken. He was beginning to
stride toward me, his bronze eyes glowing like molten
metal, and I was so flustered I almost didn't get my left
hand up in time. That stopped him, right in the middle of a
step, and then 1 was able to leave the chair he was already
so close to. That whole thing was absolutely crazy, and I
wanted no part of it.

I took a minute to study the 'frozen determined look on
bis face as I calmed down, and then the reason for his
behavior finally came to me- The spell he was under must
have been a reflexive one, the sort that gets stronger the
harder you fight against it, and he'd been fighting awfully
hard earlier. Because of that he was now determined to
"prove" that he was the man for me, the exact opposite of
what he would want to prove if the spell was canceled. I
couldn't allow anything like that to happen, of course, not
when I knew how he really felt—and maybe not even
under other circumstances. I had never seen a man act like
that before, as though nothing I said or did was likely to
discourage him, and it made me vaguely uneasy. Just how
determined did some men get?

I shook my head to dislodge the useless question and
tightened the robe around me again, then gestured away
the freeze I had on him while softly speaking another
word. Being released caused him to stumble as normal
motion was restored, his gaze still on the chair where I'd

306

SHARON GREEN

been sitting, and then he was standing still and frowning
around, confused about what was happening.

"You were right to begin with," I told him when his
eyes finally found me, faint surprise showing in them. "I
am entitled to make my own choice in a man, and that's
exactly what I intend doing. If you ever happen to be it,
I'll let you know. Right now you'd better go back to your
tent—while you still have a tent to go back to." "

"So you are angry at me for what I said to you," he
decided, nodding a little at the conclusion. "Well, 1 can't
very well blame you for feeling that way, but I also can't
let it stand. The only way I can get myself back to
something like normal is to do what 1 said I would—prove
to you that I'm the choice for you to make. Suppose 1 start
with apologizing again, only this time make it more—
heartfelt. What do you say?"

He started toward me again, this time with a faint grin,
his arms beginning to rise as though he were going to put
them around me—and promptly bounced off the invisible
wall I'd created. One of his hands went immediately to his
face, cupping a nose that had taken the brunt of the unseen
encounter, and I couldn't help smiling a little to myself.
Some men, it seemed, were very sure of themselves, but
running nose-first into a blank wall was enough to dampen
anyone's self-possession.

"What I say is what 1 said earlier: I don't need any
apologies, nor do I want them," I informed him with what
I hoped was the proper chill. "I don't care what you do to
bring yourself back to normal, as long as you do it away
from me. Now, are you leaving this tent—or do I have to
throw you out?"

"You couldn't throw me out without using magic, but I
suppose that would be enough to do it," he grudged, his
hand still to his face. "You're a hard woman, Laciel, but
if you think I'll let little things like invisible walls stop me,
you're kidding yourself. I'm going to keep working on you
until you see things my way—even if it takes longer than
this quest. You can't keep a wall between us forever, and
once it comes down I'll make you see things my way.
Don't say I didn't warn you."

Those eyes pinned me with one last stare before he

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

307

turned to the entrance silk, and once he was gone I moved
to my bed and sat down on the edge of it. The best thing
that could be said about that situation was that he didn't
seem determined to die for the cause any longer, but I
wasn't entirely certain how good a thing that was. In his
condition he didn't realize how much he hated me, so he
was fully determined to prove that he loved me and that he
could make me love him back. I wasn't about to be silly
enough to fall in love with him, of course, but somehow I
had the feeling that the following days would not be that
easy to dismiss.

CHAPTER  12

The following "morning" brought no let-up in the snow-
storm, and while I ate InThig told me what its scouting of
the night before had produced. I'd been asleep when it had
gotten back, and there hadn't been anything serious enough
that it felt it had to wake me.

". . . so if the gate I found is the next one we have to
use, it isn't very far—under normal conditions," it said.
"I have the distinct impression, however, that normal
conditions here mean a constant snowstorm, and the result-
ing terrain is not what one might think of as reliable. If
you all try to walk, even roped together, you're most
likely to end up in one of those hidden crevasses."

"So I'll have to take us to the next gate with magic," I
said, chewing thoughtfully as I considered the situation.
"You know, InThig, it occurs to me that the last few
worlds have required the use of an awful lot of magic,
even more than being on magic-based worlds should ac-
count for. I have the feeling this route was chosen with a
good deal of deliberation, and not simply because of what
we have and will run into. There's a dual purpose working
here that seems to go like this: if the party following the
trail had no magic user, it would fall victim to any one of a
number of contrived or natural disasters. If it did have a
magic user, that Sighted would be burdened more and
more with the need to provide protection, possibly to the
extent of running out of strength at the worst possible

in»

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

309

time. I've made sure that I won't run out of strength, but
my method isn't what might be considered orthodox, so it
probably wasn't anticipated. Aside from that, I don't see
any flaw in the theory."

"You're most likely correct," InThig agreed, its blaz-
ing red eyes appearing distracted as it considered the facts.
"The enemy was clearly hoping that you would find it
impossible to escape the clutches of the god-king on that
blind world, but didn't rule out the possibility that the rest
of the group would manage to leave that world, perhaps by
having the gate opened by me from the other side. By
those standards, however, he would also have provided for
your escape as well, so your theory seems quite fitting."

"It's nice to know what the enemy has in mind, but I
wish we also knew where the thread was leading us," I
fretted, up to the point of stuffing down the food mechan-
ically instead of enjoying what 1 was eating. "There's
something waiting for us at the very end of the trail, I'm
so sure of it I can taste it. but it isn't going to be some-
thing we can anticipate, I'm even more sure of that. How
do you find a way to think of something you can't
anticipate?"

"Laciel, even demons can'fdo miracles," InThig said
with a growl of amusement, not in the least disturbed over
what was ahead of us. "We'll simply have to cope with it
when we come to it. In the interim, I have a question I
meant to ask you, concerning that wall I encountered when
I returned and tried to reach the foot of your bed. I also
discovered then that your carpeting was wet, and checking
scents told me who your visitor had been. I do hope
you erected that wall to be certain that no one else was able
to enter, and simply forgot to banish it once he had left."

"InThig!" I said with a good deal of indignation—and
quite a bit more embarrassment. "I don't know what you
think I am, but I did not entertain a man in here last night.
And most certainly not that particular man. How could
you say such a thing?"

"1 said it from fatigue," the demon answered dryly,
stretching out in long cat-comfort on the carpeting. "I'm
tired of dropping hints you persist in misunderstanding or
ignoring, and what I think you are is a woman old enough

SHARON GREEN

3io

to find a man to share her life with. Rik strikes me as the
perfect candidate for that position, and I'd like to know
why you refuse to even consider him.''

"Why would I consider someone who hates me?" I
asked with impatience, leaving the table to go to the heavy
cold-clothes I'd created after awakening. "I'd rather not
go into the details of how I know he hates me, but take my
word for it that he does. Is that who you want me 1o share
my life with? Someone who hates me?"

"He—did speak to you rather vitriolically," the demon
admitted, this time looking and sounding disturbed. "At
times it's difficult to keep vapor from drifting, which is
why I happened to overhear your conversation at me last
gate. Laciel—why did he come here last evening?"

I stopped getting into the cold-clothes when I heard the
growling edge to InThig's voice, an unexpected reaction
that gave me a rather good idea. The demon had more than
enjoyed the suggestion that he help keep Zail away from
me, but Zail was no longer my biggest problem. If I could
get it to look at Rik the way it apparently looked at Zail,
I'd not only have all the help I needed against unwanted
intrusion, I'd also have an end to all the advertising InThig
had been doing on the bronze-eyed man's behalf. It was at
least worth a try. and if it worked I'd be in a much
stronger position.

"He—said he had decided to prove who the best man
was by taking me to bed," 1 admitted in an appropriately
low voice without looking at the demon, speaking nothing
but the truth but neglecting to mention that one or two
things had been left out. "He wasn't asking me, he was
telling me, and the wall was the only way I could keep
him at a distance. He—also said he wasn't going to stop
trying."

"How well will he try once I've turned both of his
bodies into pretty red ribbons?" InThig rumbled in the
growliest voice I'd ever heard, the words accompanied by
the sound of its claws breaking through into the wooden
floor under the carpeting. I couldn't help flinching when I
saw how blazing hot its eyes had grown, and knew imme-
diately that I'd gone a little too far.

"Please, InThig, don't forget that we still need him for

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        311

the quest," I said hastily, trying to backtrack only a short
way. "If you could just help to keep him away from me
until we've returned the balance stone to where it belongs,
I'm sure everything will be fine."

"Yes, the quest," InThig muttered, very reluctantly
giving up its original idea. "We do, of course, have to
consider the quest before anything else, and that means i
can't damage him even a small bit. But there are other
ways, Laciel, there are other ways."

It got to its feet and began pacing around and muttering,
something I hadn't often seen it do, but at least the ques-
tion of violence was settled. InThig would keep Rik away
from me until the quest was over and the spell could be
dissolved, and then he would certainly leave fast enough
on his own. As I got into the rest of my heavy clothing, I
knew the time couldn't come fast enough to suit me.

No more than ten minutes later the others began arriving
at my pavilion, all of them dressed in the warm clothing
I'd provided. Su had had to be given boots as well, and I'd
also given Dranna and myself heftier pairs. Dranna looked
strange out of the green gown she'd worn so long and Su
looked uncomfortable all wrapped up, but snowstorms
aren't known for catering to people's individual prefer-
ences. Zail made sure to mention iif an aside that I should
have provided that clothing the "night" before, for him
even if for no one else; I made sure to show fitting remorse
for my oversight, but I couldn't help wondering how
strongly the spell was affecting him. Zail seemed very
eager for my company, but it was someone else who had
come through a snowstorm to talk to me.

When we were alt assembled, I led the way outside and
created the long sled we would all be riding on. Since it
would be moving just above the snow rather than on it, the
sled didn't need anything to pull it, which was a lucky
tiling. The snow flew at us behind a terribly cutting wind,
the storm turning the world into mounding white beneath a
darkly invisible sky, and I would have hated bringing any
sort of animal into something like that. I didn't much care
for being in it myself, but hopefully that state wouldn't last
very long.

Su had to be first on the sled, and I gestured over the

SHARON GREEN

312

howl of the wind that 1 wanted to be second. No one tried
disputing me for the position, not even with hand signals,
but 1 quickly discovered that third place had apparently
become the prize of the day. Zail was helping Dranna
through the drifts and against the wind, but she simply
couldn't move fast enough, which left the race to Kadrim
and Rik. Both of them began trotting toward the sled at the
same time, their intentions obvious, but I wasn't the only
one watching the contest. At four paces the two were just
about neck and neck, but then a deep black body appeared
out of the swirling storm and accidently blundered into the
legs of one of the runners, sending him sprawling in the
snow. The second runner reached the sled even before me
first could get back to his feet, so it was Kadrim's arms
which closed around me as soon as he had settled himself.
In the pavilion Rik had been standing as close to me as a
sprawled cat-body had let him be, and apparently InThig
hadn't been prepared to have him any closer.

When everyone was finally aboard, I got the sled under
way. Su indicated the proper direction with gestures, and
if we could have seen anything the ride might have been a
little more interesting. It took almost an hour to get to the
gate that way, and the only thing mat broke the monotony,
for me at least, was the shadow crevasse we passed over. I
was suddenly able to See it there, under about ten feet of
snow, just waiting for someone or something to walk out
onto it- The snow would have collapsed along with all
traces of solid footing, taking whoever was on it down into
the depths with it. The only one who was on it at the time
was InThig, however, and that was when I noticed the
demon wasn't leaving any sort of footprints; I spent the
rest of the ride wondering how it managed to do that while
still looking so solid.

If the ride to the gate was dull, passing through it
changed all that. I didn't understand why Su was pulling
so hard against my hand while I stood inside me gate—
until Kadrim and I went through. Suddenly the three of us
were plunging toward beautiful turquoise-green water that
the rest of our party was already splashing into, and I had
just enough time to speak a word of banishment for all that
heavy clothing we wore before the water closed over my

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

313

head. It was very warm midaftemoon water, and when I
surfaced again I nearly gasped at the beat of the air.
Instead of gasping, though, I created a wide raft for us,
one everyone in me party seemed capable of swimming to.

When I got to the side of the raft, I discovered that
inThig had been momentarily out-maneuvered. A big arm
closed around me. supposedly to help me up onto the raft,
but primarily so that two wet lips could briefly touch mine.
That was all there was to it, a kiss so short that no one saw
it given or received, but it upset me so much that once I'd
been boosted up onto the raft I wasn't sure I wouldn't have
been better off staying in me water.

In another few minutes all six of us were on the raft,
and it would have been hard finding a more bedraggled-
looking group. A black-vapor InThig floated anxiously
over us until everyone was soggily but safely aboard, but it
didn't come down to join us until I'd disgustedly banished
every drop of water soaking us. At that point it was
possible to feel the really oppressive heat of the place, and
that came close to setting off my suddenly-touchy temper.
I was getting very tired of that up-and-down nonsense, one
minute hot, the next minute cold, high after mat and low
beyond it. If I could have gotten my hands on the enemy
right then, I wouldn't have needed magic to do him a
whole lot of damage.

"You know, I've heard that this is the way they wear
metal down," Zail observed to no one in particular, most
of his attention into checking the state of his sword. "First
they make it very hot, then they plunge it into cold water,
and men they hammer it-''

"Well, if anyone tries hammering me, they'll find a
response they won't soon forget," I muttered, trying to
figure out how my feet in their boots could be bone dry but
still feel wet. "This sort of treatment might work well on
metal, but it does an even better job on tempers."

"We'll all be better off saving me temper tantrums for
when they'll do some good," Rik said from where he
stood, trying to see something besides pretty green water.
"Right now what we need is a little propulsion."

"If you're in that much of a hurry, I'll make you a
paddle," I snapped, having reached the point of blaming

314             SHARON GREEN

most of my foul humor on what he had done. He didn't
love me, he didn't even like me, so treating me like that
had been totally unfair.

"Not a bad idea, but a little too much of a temptation,"
he drawled in answer, turning to give me a grin. "Consid-
ering what I stilt owe you, you shouldn't offer me that sort
of an opening."                               ,

I understood what he meant and I bristled, but'lnThig
apparently took the comment in the context of what I had
told it. Rik took a step with the obvious intention of moving
along the raft to me, but suddenly he found a long, black
tail under that step instead of planking. InThig yowled, Rik
yelled, and the next minute he was down flat on his face
and not far from having been pitched off the raft entirely.
Only his own cat-like reflexes had saved him, and that
little incident made me feel so much better that I was able
to turn to Su and get us going in the right direction.

The snow world and the water world seemed to set a
pattern for the rest of the morning; the distance between
gates was never far, but it was also never easy. We
climbed out of the water into the desert, crawled from the
desert into the high mountains, gasped and climbed out of
me mountains into absolute pitch-dark blackness, then groped
along into blinding light. The light was so intense that
even heavy filters didn't let us see more than the^cracked
clay we walked on, and I made no attempt at all to use the
Sight. If, after the water world, I hadn't taken the precau-
tion of sending InThig through a gate first after Su pointed
out the proper exit, that world of light probably would
have blinded us all.

After what seemed like days or months, we finally
passed through a gate into a world that didn't attack our
senses. Granted it was a purple and violet world with a big
silver sun in a light red sky, but it was solid and dry,
neither too hot nor too cold, had enough air for us to
breathe, and the black vegetation made no attempt to
swallow us down. It was almost too good to be true, but
we couldn't afford to pass it up as a place to stop for a
while. Everyone was tired and hungry—not to mention
frazzled, stunned and stretched out to dry—so there was
no choice at all.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

315

"If we stay together and keep alert, we should be all
right," Rik decided with more resignation than enthusi-
asm, looking around at the unusual landscape. It was very
quiet on mat world, the black trees and grass somehow
adding to the silence, but somewhere far away there was a
faint tinkling sound reminiscent of a poetic brook. For
some reason the sound struck a distant chord of memory in
me, but I was too tired to go searching for that memory
when it persisted in staying distant.

"There's life of some sort on this world," InThig said,
its tail moving in restless jerks as it also looked around. "I
can't quite pin it down, not even the direction I sense it in,
but it's definitely there. Perhaps I'd better have a look
'around."

"Don't go too far," Rik warned it, sparing only a
glance for the demon before returning his inspection to our
surroundings. "We won't be staying here any longer than
we have to."

"I'll know when you begin moving again,** InThig
returned in a very neutral way, then slipped off into brush
(hat hid it quickly and completely. I wasn't sure if Rik had
noticed its coolness yet, but I felt a stab of guilt when I
remembered how much InThig had liked Rik, and how
close they had become. My attempts at self-protection had
ruined all that, but I'd really had no other choice. Deciding
right then to tell InThig the truth as soon as possible made
me feel a litle better, and let me get on with what had to be
done.

"I need two hours of sleep," I announced to no one in
particular, then spoke the spell that gave us food, drink,
six thick mats and blankets, and a shimmering hemisphere
that hugged the ground with a thirty-foot diameter. "What
you see all around us is our warding, made visible so
you'll all know not to wander out of its area of protection.
Eat and drink as much as you like, but someone wake me
when the time is up."

With that I went to one of the mats and lay down, pulled
me blanket over me, then muttered the brief spell I'd
worked out a few years earlier, when I hadn't wanted to
skimp on my magic lessons, but needed extra time for
tournament Hellfire practice. Two hours of sleep deliver-

3l6              SHARON GREEN

ing the recuperation of eight was what it did, and there
seemed to be only a reasonable limit on the number of
times I could use it. I'd been saving it for an emergency
and that seemed to be it, and as soon as I closed my eyes 1
was out.

I half-awoke to a deliciousty pleasant sensation, some-
thing familiar but still bright and new that made me feel
wonderfully alive. 1 floated in that not-yet-awake state.
enjoying the sensation—until I realized what it was and sat
bolt upright with a gasp of indignation.

"Ssh, you'll wake the others," Rik said with a badly-
swallowed grin as I glared at him, looking very comfort-
able where he sat at the side of my mat- "You said you
wanted someone to wake you after two hours, and that's
what I did."

"I didn't say I wanted it done with a kiss!" I came
back, finding it hard keeping my voice low. "You're
taking advantage of me and you know it, and 1 refuse to
stand for it. If you ever try this again, I'll feed you the sort
of charge I did that time in my tent, the one that knocked
you flat! That'll teach you!"

"But I already know how, so I don't have to be taught,"       i||
he protested with the grin that refused to be swallowed, his       ^
bronze eyes amused. "After our time together in the barn,       ^••'
you should be aware of that- Unless, of course/, you're       ^
suffering from a memory lapse, in which case I'd be       rf
delighted to—jog your memory."                            ^

I really felt stupid blushing, but I just couldn't help it       ^
and of course that monster had to make it worse by       ^-
chuckling. My legs had gotten tangled in the blanket and it       §
took me an infuriating moment to get free, but once I did I       jj|
got quickly to my feet, having no intention of participating       f
in that conversation any longer. I really didn't want to hurt       ||
Rik. not after he'd risked his life getting me out of that       t
city, but I also didn't want to be taken advantage of. I       ?
wished briefly I could tell him how much he hated me, but       ^
of course it wouldn't have done any good.                      ."

"I don't know why you keep trying to run away from       ^
it," he said from behind me, his voice showing he'd
followed me erect. "If our time together made you even        ^
half as happy as it did me, you should be more than       '.

THE PAR SIDE OF FOREVER

317

willing to give it a chance. Say yes, Laciel, and make me
the happiest man alive."

"I should do that, and make you the biggest fool alive,"
I muttered, moving quickly away from the hands mat had
come to my arms. "Right now the only thing I'm saying
yes to is moving on— Where's Su?"

I'd begun looking for the big woman as an excuse to get
away from Rik, but she wasn't on any of the mats or even
near the food. There were a few black bushes in our
warded area, but none of them was big enough to com-
pletely hide someone of her size. Rik had seemed reluctant
to drop the topic we'd been discussing, but suddenly he
was beside me rather than behind, and his frown was
strictly for the question I'd asked.

"1 don't know," he answered, looking around the way I
was doing. "She was here when I went over to your mat,
resting like everyone else. And now that you mention it,
Kadrim had disappeared with her."

"But where could they have gone?" I protested, seeing
immediately that he was right- Only Dranna and Zail stiB
slept peacefully on their mats, with neither Su nor Kadrim
anywhere in sight.

"Wherever it is, I'll skin mem alive when they get
back," he growled, almost as angry as he was worried.
"They should both know better than to wander off, even if
it was privacy they were after. We don't even know what's
on this world."

"Well, I think I'd better be with them if they find out,"
I said, making the decision fast at the urging of the chill I
felt. "You can wait here as long as you like, but I'm going
after them."

"Without Su to follow the trail, how do you intend
finding out which way they went?" he objected with a
new frown, probably because of what I'd said—and me
way I'd said it. "If you think I'm going to have half the
expedition wandering around in different directions, trying
to figure out where everyone else is, you're out of your
mind. If they haven't shown up by the time InThig gets
back, we'll let it look for them."

"By then it'll probably be too late," I countered, feel-
ing more certain of that the longer I thought about it.

318             SHARON GREEN

"And you're assuming InThig will be back, which might
not be so. It said it will know when we start moving again,
which probably means it intends meeting us on the way.
And finding which way they went shouldn't be too hard."

I turned away from him and spoke a simple tracking
spell, one that caused two sets of footprints to begin
glowing in the black grass. No Sighted left a trail like that,
especially not a Sighted with something to hide, which
was one of the reasons why we were following the trail of
the balance stone rather than that of the person who had
taken it.

"Why don't you save the magic and just stay here?"
Rik said, his voice and the look in his eyes equally strange.
"I'll use my link-shape to follow them by scent if you
think it's that important, and bring them right back. There's
no need for you to leave the warding."

"And what if your link-shape can't cope with whatever
they might have run into?" i countered again, beginning to
get annoyed with him. "Then whatever-it-is will have
you, too, and I'll have to come after all three of you. if
there's anything left of any of you to come after. I'm
going now whether you like it or not."

"Whether I like it or not," he repeated flatly, an echo
of my annoyance starting to show in his eyes. "What I
particularly don't like is that attitude, and the day/ will
come that you try using it one time too often. At that point
it won't matter how hot a sorceress you are, you'll still get
what's coming to you. If you're going, let's go."

He started off without waiting for an answer, following
the glowing trail I'd brought into being, his left hand
loosening his sword in its sheath. I glared at his back as I
hurried to catch up, wishing there was time to tell him what
I actually thought of him, remembering an old unSighted
saying that began, "If looks could kill . . ." In my world
looks could do more than kill, and if Graythor hadn't
protected that blockhead, I would have taken a good deal
of pleasure in demonstrating some of them.

The two sets of footprints led through the warding wall
and off through the scattered trees and bushes of the area,
the stride-length showing they hadn't been hurrying. It
also seemed as though they'd been walking together, prob-

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

319

f-

ably talking as they went, rather than one taking off alone
and the other following. The area all around was still as
quiet as it had been, no birds singing, no insects buzzing,
no small animals hopping shyly away. Silence like that is
enough to make you shiver and the emptiness just adds to
it, especially with that faint tinkling sound coming from
somewhere. I looked away from the hushed landscape to
mention the sound to Rik, and saw something that added
to the chills 1 already felt: Rik was no longer following the
trail by watching the footprints. His head was cocked to
one side, as though he were listening to something and
following the sound instead, and his arms were hanging
limply away from his swordbelt. The alertness he was
always insisting on seemed to have deserted him com-
pletely, leaving behind nothing but an enthralled floating.

"Damn," I muttered under my breath, wishing I hadn't
been quite so right in saying he might not be able to cope
with whatever was out here. He was paralleling the two
previous sets of footprints even though he appeared to be
no longer aware of them, and that meant Su and Kadrim
really had been taken by something. That left me on my
own as far as any rescue attempt went, but I hadn't
expected it to be any other wayl It would have been nice
having someone normally alive along just for the com-
pany, but where magic is concerned you actually can't
have everything. The unSighted don't often understand
that, but the talented know it well enough.

My mind considered the problem for a moment, then I
left Rik and moved ahead with more speed—and invisibil-
ity wrapped tightly about me. Letting whatever was out
there see me coming could cost Kadrim and Su their lives,
not to mention Rik, I moved through the sparse bushes and
trees as fast as I could without making noise, and in
another minute saw an odd grouping of reddish gray boul-
ders, the glowing footprints leading right into the middle
of them. I was almost afraid of what I would see among
those boulders, but that doesn't mean I slowed down. The
thick black grass under my feet grew right up to the rocks,
which meant my steps continued to be muffled even in that
unnatural silence.

Silence except for the tinkling. By the time I reached die

320 SHARON GREEN

boulders 1 noticed the sound had grown slightly louder.
although it was also coming from other directions as well.
With a great deal of care 1 moved around a boulder,
knowing that some of the Sighted, like me, were able to
perceive an invisible presence even if the invisibility itself
couldn't be breached. If the whoevers were Sighted and I
brought myself to their attention— The thought died once I
had stepped more fully around the barrier, and saw what it
had hidden.

The black grass grew all across the large circle made by
the boulders, almost like a nest-lining for the things that
lay in it. Bright red they were with violet markings, in-
cluding the short tentacles that grew out of their upper
bodies like four waving arms- The round heads sitting on
thin necks showed dull black eyes, two holes instead of a
nose, and wide mouths filled with teeth that looked more
like triangular daggers. The bottom parts of them had
nothing like legs, and wide tracks here and there through
the grass seemed to indicate that the only way they could
get around was by dragging themselves, which probably
wasn't the easiest thing to do. There were six of them, two
about four feet high, one slightly smaller than that, three
who were half the size of the big ones, and the tinkling
sound was coming from the middle-sized one.

I took a deep breath and let it out quietly, relieved to see
that Kadnm and Su seemed to be unharmed, not so re-
lieved to see that they were just standing about four feet
away from the group of tentacled things—which were
surrounded by smaller and larger mounds of what looked
like picked-clean bones. These were life-forms that called
their prey to them, then. and although I didn't know why
they hadn't already started on their newest meal, 1 was
very glad of it. The glazed took my two companions wore
said they wouldn't be doing anything in the way of chang-
ing the menu, but now 1 was there to take care of the
problem.

I had just cleared the boulder on my way to joining the
group, when a step behind me announced the arrival of
Rik. He floated/walked in without hesitation, still listen-
ing careftilly, and passed me to join Kadnm and Su where

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

321

they were standing, the tinkling sound fading out as he
came to a stop. Feeling confused I came to a stop myself,
wondering how the things were going to bring their vic-
tims closer without the tinkling—and abruptly found out.
One minute there were three things sitting/lying on the
ground, and the next minute those things had turned into
people.

Kadrim made a sound of pained ecstasy, Su laughed
with relief and joyous welcome, and Rik stirred with what
seemed like pleasure, all of mem now staring at the three
people lying at their ease in the grass. The woman looking
at Kadrim was small and beautiful, with red hair and an
infectious grin, while the man in front of Su had long
brown hair tied back, and looked as though he would be
even larger than Kadrim if he stood. 1 didn't understand
until I moved my gaze to the third figure in front of Rik,
and then it all came clear at once. The woman in the grass
in front of him, raising her arms invitingly, was me.

I snapped out a quick gesture, freezing my three com-
panions in place just as they were about to rush forward,
then hurried over and formed a heavy wall in front of them
that was really a segment of a warding hemisphere. 1 had
die awful feeling that the warding would do no good, and
when I released them only to watch as they threw them-
selves against the wall, trying to get past it, I found I was
right. Reluctantly I froze them again, then got rid of the
wall and warding. Warding works to keep things from
getting to you to begin with, but only rarely will it sever a
connection already made. One way or another I had to get
my companions released by the beings who had cast the
spell, that or figure out some way to get all three of them
to a gate only Su could find for us, locate the proper next
world, then take them through one at a time. Doing all that
wasn't entirely beyond me, but I hated to think what
would be left of me if I did. It would be much better trying
the alternative first—and hoping hard it would work.

1 took one step forward and banished the invisibility
spell, causing a startled stirring among the three small
beings behind the big ones, but the man and woman on the
ground to my right paid no attention to me. Only the third
figure, the medium-sized one that looked like me, slowly

322 SHARON GREEN

turned its head in my direction, and then the tinkling sound
began again.

"That won't do you any good at all," I said. working
hard to keep from showing how odd I felt talking to
myself. "Your call doesn't affect me, so you can't reach
through to my mind. Release my fhends."

"Your friends are happy now, and will soon be even
happier," the thing answered in a low, warm voice, the
smile it wore reflecting in its violet eyes. "They want very
much to nourish me and mine, and their presence means
extended life for one or more of my mates. Nourishment
has been difficult to locate of late, and if 1 hadn't heard
your friends' arrival in me area, I would have had to
sacrifice one of my mates to sustain the rest of us. I would
men have produced another mate almost immediately, of
course, but one that would require considerably less nour-
ishment for a while. Now that won't be necessary."

"I'm sorry to disappoint you, but my friends and I
haven't come here simply to nourish you and your mates,*'
I said, wishing the thing would change back to its original
form. "If you won't release them, I'll have no choice but
to destroy you."

"It's not time yet for me to serve as nourishment," the
thing said, losing its smile to pout in disapproval. "I
haven't yet produced a new singer for my mates, and that
means I'm not yet to be replaced. Besides, don't you know
that if you destroy me, your friends will also be destroyed?
Their thoughts are now linked to mine, and should I fail to
release them, they will go as 1 do."

"I don't believe that," I said, folding my hands to fists
at my sides to keep from showing how much I did believe
it. "And even if it were true, I'd still refuse to give my
friends up to you- If I destroy you and your mates, my
friends might die, but at least they won't be nourishment
for any of you."

"How inconsiderate a life-form you are!" me thing
protested with great annoyance, the violet eyes now flash-
ing with anger. "Very well. If you refrain from destroying
any of us, I'll release one of your friends. You, of course,
may choose the one."

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

323

&,

"^
4-

t.

"No deal," 1 said at once, immediately feeling better as
soon as I saw it was willing to dicker. "My friends and I
axe traveling together for a purpose, one which will be
mined if one of them is lost. Leaving two would be like
leaving them all."

"You are very exasperating," me thing accused, this
time glaring at me. "Very well, I will release two, but that
is my final offer. I would sooner be destroyed than give up
die nourishment my mates require, nourishment they're
unable to get for themselves. Take two or destroy us, and
(hat's my final word on the matter!"

The thing lay there glaring at me, showing me my own
face set in lines of determination, and suddenly I didn't
blow what to do. The creature wasn't bluffing or lying, 1
knew beyond all doubt that it wasn't, and a really horrible
thought had come to me. As far as the quest was con-
cerned I only needed two of the people who were caught.
exactly what the thing was offering. If I took those two
and continued on the trail, we would very likely make it
all the way to where the stone was being kept; if I tried to
nuke a fight of it, I could conceivably lose all three.

- That's the reason I'm along, Rik had said. To give my
life if that will mean saving one w more of the rest of you.

Laciel, child, this isn't a friendly •competition, Graythor
lad said. You can't let your personal feelings get in the
way.

I will release two, the creature had said, but that's my
final offer.

I turned to my left and looked up at the bronze-eyed
man standing not far from me, the man who was mistaken
when he said he loved me. If I'd asked him he would have
insisted that I sacrifice him, leave him as payment for two
other, more important lives, that one life wasn't worth
losing millions for. 1 could have countered the claim by
saying that if one life is worth zero, multiplying it by a
million does nothing more than add additional zeroes, and
. if a million lives are worth dying for, so is one life- The
if contention wasn't original with me, but it so happened I

- believed it; if one of us died trying, the loss would be
"painful but acceptable; to bargain away the life of one in

324

SHARON GREEN

exchange for two others, to let a life be thrown away, was
not,

If I'd been silly enough to love Rik, 1 probably would
have been silly enough to do as he'd asked.

"Well?" the creature demanded, impatience heavy in
its voice. "Haven't you made up your mind yet?"

"As a matter of fact I have," I answered, turning back
to stare into my own face. It looked different from the way
I was used to seeing it, but mat was because I was used to
seeing a mirror image, not a duplication. It wasn't me
lying there on the ground, I was the one standing up, and
even if everyone else in the universe was confused, I
wasn't. "My decision is that we do it my way, whether
you like it or not.''

1 didn't even have to move to touch one hand to Rik and
the other to Su, Kadrim linked in on the other side of Su
by the hand he'd closed around her arm just before I'd
frozen them. When the relay was complete 1 activated my
defenses, and if my three companions hadn't been frozen
they would have screamed at the surge of angry blue
sparks. The creature in front of me did scream, me same
sound Rik had made the night he'd accidentally touched
me, and then my three companions were falling to the
ground, and there were no longer three other humans to be
seen. Instantly I cut the flow and warded us all com-
pletely, then began to try repairing the damage I had so
deliberately done.

It didn't take as long as I thought it would to restore the
three to pain-free consciousness, and when I saw mat they
were all right except for being disoriented, I turned back to
the creature. It bothered me that its short, ugly body was
still quivering in pain, but when I soothed the pain away
its agitation didn't disappear as well.

"How did you do that?" it demanded hoarsely, still
using my voice. "How did you steal my mates' nourish-
ment from me?"

"I didn't steal anything," ! corrected the accusing look
in the flat black eyes. "I won back what was mine to
begin with, using one of my magical defenses. You told
me yourself that you were linked to their minds, so 1 used

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

325

their minds to reach through to you. The only way for you
to stop the pain was to release them, which was just what i
was waiting for. They're ail free now, and you won't get
them back again."

"I truly dislike beings with such great magical strength,"
it spat, disgust and accusation coloring its voice. "Take
your friends and leave here now. I wish to be alone to
decide which of my mates is to supply nourishment for the
rest."

"Why don't you put that decision off for a while?" I
asked, then spoke the spell that created half a carcass of
meat in front of each of me creatures. The two big ones
and three small ones fell on the meat as though they were
starving, but the medium-sized one looked up from its
carcass to stare at me.

"You were able to offer this in exchange, and yet you
still fought?" it asked, bewilderment now covering every-
thing else. "And now, with victory indisputably yours,
you supply nourishment when you no longer have to? The
reasoning behind these things is totally beyond me."

"And I'm afraid I can't explain it," I said, reflecting
that to say I'd never bought the safety of any of my pack
would be worse than saying nothing at all. "All I can do is
wish you and yours well, and caution you to finish as
much of that meat as quickly as possible. Once I leave this
world, whatever's left will cease to be."

"But whatever was used will remain as used," it agreed,
not quite nodding. "Only what remains untouched and
unchanged will vanish. I'm familiar with the rule, but I
don't understand it either."

"Maybe some day, when I have more time, I'll return
and explain it to you," I said, wondering with faint amuse-
ment if I was fated to spend the rest of my life lecturing
people on magic. "Until that time, I bid you farewell."

"And 1 you," the creature answered, then gave all its
attention to the meat in front of it. As dagger teeth tore
into the carcass with pleasure I turned away, and found
three people up on their feet, waiting for me.

"Don't any of you try outdistancing that warding," I
^      warned them. pleased to see them looking normal again.

326

SHARON GREEN

"I've heard other singers in this area, and if you come in
range of them you'll be taken again."

"As we were taken this time," Kadrim said, rubbing at
one broad shoulder as he looked down at me. "Clearly we
should not have left the area of protection you provided,
no matter how great we fancied our combined blade-skill
to be."

"Which brings up the question of just why you did
leave." Rik interposed, giving a regretful Kadrim and a
rueful Su his best stem look. "Did it slip your mind that
we were all supposed to stay together?"

"Thought it might be a good idea to take a walk when I
saw you starting to wake Laciel," Su told him with a
small shrug while Kadrim examined the rock formations
around us. "Kadrim came along to help me keep an eye
on—other things."

"Oh," Rik answered with all me sternness gone, his
glance to me just short of the blushing mark. It had been
his messing around that had put Su and Kadrim in jeop-
ardy, he thought, and the idea wasn't an easy one to
accept.

"Maybe I ought to campaign for the job of leader after
all," 1 mused, looking at none of them but seeing Rik's
continuing upset out of the corner of my eye. "Just to
keep everyone in line, you understand. Of course, you'll
all have to overlook the fact that I would have banished the
warding as soon as we got moving again, which would
have made all of you immediately vulnerable- That would
have been only a small mistake, though, and everyone's
entitled to a small mistake."

"Only if they don't have other people's lives depending
on them," Rik came back, understanding the point 1 was
trying to make but refusing to accept it. "We'd better get
back to see if Dranna and Zail are all right.''

We all realized that the stiff-necked imbecile was right
to remind us that there were two more members of our
party whom we'd forgotten about, so we headed back to
our campsite as fast as possible. If Zail and Dranna had
awakened and decided to come looking for us, I didn't
even want to think about what probably had happened to
them.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

327

To our great relief, nothing had happened to them.
When they saw us they started to come forward to meet
us, but we waved them back to keep them within the
warding, then sat down and explained what the problem
was. All three of the former victims spoke about the
unbelievably beautiful music they'd heard just before their
memories faded out, and I was very pleased to see that
they didn't remember anything beyond that. With visions
of their loved ones in front of them they would have gone
happily to be consumed, and would never have known it
was happening. It was a sour joke that Rik would have
gone to someone he really hated, but at that point I was the
only one who could appreciate the humor in it.

In turn we were told that Zail had wanted to go looking
for all of us when he woke to find us missing, but Dranna
had had a bad feeling about that world and hadn't been
able to force herself to leave the campsite—or to let Zail
leave her alone. We all decided aloud that it was a damned
good thing at least one of us had more brains than raw
courage, and since we weren't Joking, Dranna was pleased.
Everyone else had a second meal while I had my first, and
then, after I had warded everyone individually, we went
on our way. InThig caught up to us just before the next
gate, and told us that the life forms on that world appeared
to be harmless. It was clear the demon couldn't hear the
"music" any more than I could, and after we all stopped
laughing I took a minute to explain what was so funny.

I suppose that mat was the point in time most easily
pointed to as when things stopped being funny. We went
through a series of worlds after that which I most enjoy
remembering as a long string of blurs: the place where
me least sound was magnified a thousand times, the place
where the planet itself was alive and hungry, the place
where the very sunlight and air were painful, the place where
living things lay still and unanimated, and only the
dead were awake and moving about. That was where
Kadrim did most of the fighting, the native "zombies"
most often singling him out to attack with rusting swords,
but no matter how hard they tried they couldn't get past his
swinging, deadly blade to reach him. Possibly there was

328

SHARON GREEN

one point of amusement in all that, the one point that
turned the red-'haired man into the bewildered boy he
usually only resembled. When we reached the gate out of
there it wasn't a string of dead he left behind him but a
string of living, that being the results of striking down a
zombie. His sword had left living beings behind, sleeping
peacefully, and that was a concept he just couldn't get
used to.

After that it became Zail's turn, when we found our-
selves in a world of mazes. The trail of me balance stone
kept ending against blank, unyielding walls of rock, walls
that were too high to climb over. Zail deciphered a pattern
and led us through it, Su keeping a tenuous hold on the
track of the stone to make sure we didn't reconnect to a
false trail, and then we took the next gate out of there—to
a world where males and females switched perceptions. I,
personally, found the experience upsetting, but it can't be
argued that we left that world knowing each other a good
deal better.

It went on and on and on, after a while everyone
becoming as tired as I usually was. Our party needed
almost constant magical protection, especially on the illu-
sion worlds where cliff-tops ended about ten feet back
from where they appeared to end, or falling trees didn't
look to be falling until they smashed into the ground. The
worst for me was the world in which we all became
wraiths as soon as we stepped from the gate, living but
floating mists in a world where simply floating was the
best and happiest achievement. I was so tired then, so
ready to let everything go including memory, and my
magic wasn't able to counter the "world-must" to turn us
back into what we had been. Just as Sight had been
prohibited in the blind world, so were solid beings prohib-
ited there; the others couldn't have stopped me if I'd
attenuated myself to the limit and let the gentle breezes
take me where they willed. What did stop me I still don't
really know, but the others trembled with uncertainty until
we were safely through the next gate. At that point Rik
forced me to make camp by saying everyone was falling
off the feet they'd just regained, but I was the one who

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

329

really needed the rest. I fell asleep as soon as I lay down,
but despite my instructions wasn't awakened in two hours.
I'd used mat spell to uselessness, and luckily Rik noticed
in time to keep me from falling apart.

After that it went a little easier, which really should
have warned us. Three worlds later we reached a world
that wasn't a world—we reached the place called Cloud's
Heart.

CHAPTER 13

"I can't believe we're this close," Dranna kept saying,
her eyes on the cup she sipped from, the cup she held with
both hands to keep it steady. She looked really terrible,
pale and drawn and years older, her freshly cleaned and
restored green gown enhancing the appearance of her de-
cline, but she wasn't the only one. We were all. pretty
close to the ends of our ropes, and we all had cups like
hers to drink from. The drink I'd created let us all ignore
the fact that the only thing keeping us from plunging into
eternity was the magical floor I'd made, a floor that held
us just as well as it was supposed to, but which refused to
be anything but invisible. To look down was to see your-
self suspended over miles and miles of beautifully thin
cloud layer by nothing at all, cloud layer mat would not
hold any of us but InThig for the briefest moment. Without
the floor we'd all be gone, and not being able to see it
made everyone doubt, deep inside, that it would stay under
us as long as we needed it.

"It appears the last of the defenders are now being
disposed of," Kadrim said, sipping from his own cup as
he watched what just had to be the final battle. "We
should now be able to advance to the very walls of the
palace itself."

"And then it's Zail's turn again," Rik said, watching
what Kadrim was. "There don't seem to be any doors in
that place, but there has to be at least one."

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

331

Zail grunted in obvious agreement, but he hadn't been
following me conversation with more than half an ear. All
of his attention was concentrated on the pure white build-
ing we'd been fighting our way toward, the building that
didn't seem to have any way in. If we couldn't get in,
everything we'd gone through would have been for noth-
ing, and none of us could live with a thought like that.

Exactly how long it had been since we'd come through
the final gate, none of us really knew. The entire journey
felt as though it had taken ages, and maybe, on some plane
or other, it had. The only thing we knew right then was that
we'd been attacked as soon as we'd stepped through the
gate onto me magical floor InThig had warned me we'd
need. I'd gone through first with Su and created the floor,
and then Su had kept me from being drawn back all me
way when 1 returned to activate the gate for the others.
Although she hadn't looked it, the big woman had proba-
bly stopped breathing until everyone was through and I left
the gate for the last time; if some part of me hadn't been
left in the cloud worid with Su, me floor she stood on
would have immediately dissolved, sending her plunging
down to who-knew-what.

If it had been the beginning *of our journey instead of
nearly the end, the first attack -wouM have had us without
the least trouble. From the top of the beautiful, white
cloud-palace we could all see in the near distance came a
flight of what appeared to be lovely winged children,
frolicking in the air and laughing as they approached us.
Everyone stopped to stare at the charming sight, none of
them even considering touching a weapon, but my temper
had been wearing very thin over me previous few worlds,
and the outrageousness of the suggestion hit me immedi-
ately. We had fought our way through to our enemy's very
door, and now we were being greeted with warmth and
love? Not bloody likely!

No one seemed to notice when I muttered one of the
spells Graythor had taught me, the spells which provided
magical protection against magic, and luckily that included
the approaching children. They swooped and bumped and
laughed and waved until they were really close—and then
the waves began emanating from them. Faint thoughts of

332

SHARON GREEN

riotous laughter reached us, along with the conviction that
we really should be out there gamboling and flying with
the children, and then the invisible sphere I'd created
thickened to keep out even those faint suggestions. My
companions suddenly realized how close we'd all come to
leaping out into thin air in an attempt to fly, and all
thoughts of indulgent good humor went by the boards-

Kadrim was our expert in battle procedure, and I was
me one who supplied the troops he needed. His first order
had been to direct the creation of a flying force to over-
come and destroy those "children," and if he'd told me
beforehand what he intended doing with the vicious birds I
produced, I might not have made them. It soon became
clear that he was right, of course, that we couldn't advance
to our objective leaving an untouched segment of our
enemy's army behind us, but watching our enemy's "force"
being destroyed hadn't been easy. When it was all over
we'd thought we were finished with having to be sick to
our stomachs, but it had only been beginning.

"That's it," Rik said, watching as the slavering beast
tore apart the last delicate, pastel-colored unicorn. The
unicorns seemed to be the final wave, the last of the most
beautiful, graceful and lovely creatures any of us had ever
seen. Killing something about to attack you isn't usually
all that hard—unless the something happens to be an an-
gel, or a butterfly, or a translucent, brightly colored fish,
or a happily trilling songbird. In a place where we had
expected dragons we got unicorns instead, and Dranna
hadn't been able to watch right from the first. Su stayed
beside her, speaking to her quietly every now and then,
and when I hadn't been creating things to Kadrim's speci-
fications, I'd spent a good deal of time with them both.
Kadrim had pretended to be too busy moving his "troops"
around countering attacks and launching his own thrusts to
notice what he was fighting, but at battle's end he no
longer had the smooth, unlined face of a boy.

"Laciel, bring us closer to that part of the palace wall,"
Zail directed in a distracted voice, pointing to me right of
where we then were. "All those arches and colonnades are
supposed to be decorative and are probably also supposed
to be misleading, but functional always has a certain bal-

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

333

ance that decorative lacks, no matter how well done it is.
That's the point we'll try first, and if it doesn't work we'll
go to the other extreme."

I doubt if any of us had the least idea of what he meant
by "the other extreme," but we weren't the ones who had
to know. InThig's tail jerked in short, sharp arcs as I
moved our floor toward the point Zail had asked for, the
tension in all of us transmitting itself even to the demon.
The beautiful, spotless palace rose to the heights above the
clouds, and I was the only one who could See that it was
really there. To everyone else it looked like a dream, and
dreams have a bad habit of melting away just when you
place all your weight on them.

Zail spent an interminable time inspecting and reinspect-
ing the area he had decided was an entry into the palace,
peering high and low, pacing back and forth on the floor,
moving close to almost-touch, then backing away again.
As the minutes passed his frustration mounted higher and
higher, and at last he turned to us with a muttered curse.

"It's there!" he snarled, his handsome face now more
than a little haggard- "I know it's there, but I just can't
find the mechanism for opening if Laciel, can't you try
some kind of magic?"     *•

"Whatever this palace is made'of, I can't See into it," I
told him, running a hand through my limp, greasy hair.
"It doesn't resist Seeing it invites it, then sends my per-
ceptions through endless repetitions of surface viewing. I
can See it's solid and real, but I can't See beyond that."

"You know, something just occurred to me," Rik mused,
staring at the wall Zail had been inspecting, his arms
folded across his chest. "It might just be that we're all
seeing the same thing, even Laciel. Tell me why you
didn't touch that wall even once, Zail."

' 'Why—touching an entry panel wrong has been known
to seal the panel rather than open it," Zail answered,
looking as confused as I felt. "If any part of the mecha-
nism had been visible I would have known what could and
couldn't be touched, but as it is—"

"But as it is, you didn't want to take any chances," Rik
finished when Zail paused, me summation accompanied by

334

SHARON GREEN

a slow nod. "Well, I think the time has come to take a few
chances. Touch the wall, Zail, anywhere you like."

We all stared at Rik in silence for a moment, wonder-
ing if the strain had gotten to be too much for him, but at
lhat point we scarcely had anything to lose. Zail shrugged
in a what-the-hell way and turned back to the wall, stepped
closer and raised his hand, then touched it flat without any
further hesitation. Or, at least he tried to touch it flat. His
hand went right up to the wall—then disappeared into it!

"Hey, mere's nothing here!" Zail exclaimed while all
the rest of us but Rik made sounds of shocked surprise.
"How the hell did you know?"

"It seemed to be the logical assumption," our now-
grinning leader said modestly, turning his head slightly to
send a wink to me alone. "The best ways to hide some-
thing are out in plain sight or disguised as something else,
and the way in wasn't out in plain sight. I suspect we were
supposed to try breaking in somewhere else, once our
entrance expert forced himself to admit defeat. Our enemy
knows you, Zail, but not as well as he thinks he does. He
knew you'd keep from touching the wall you were investi-
gating, but he didn't know you'd tell us that you couldn't
find the mechanism even though you were sure me entry
was here. He also didn't know we'd believe you. Would
you have been able to break in, Laciel? If we-hadn't
found any other way?''

"Yes," I answered shortly, my mind concerned with
other things than explanations. If most of Cloud's Heart
was real, but the outer walls, at the very least, had been
spelled, then that meant . . .

"Then that settles it," Rik said with continuing satisfac-
tion. "We were supposed to follow Zail around from one
place to the other, then break in when he failed to get us in
any other way. That means we'd better be careful how we
touch the rest of these outer walls. We weren't being
channeled toward a particular course of action for no
reason."

"Guess I should have told somebody sooner that the
trail leads right up to that fake wall and then stops," Su
said, the words coming out with something very like em-
barrassment. "Didn't want to get pushy, though."

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

335

"Pushy," Rik echoed with a sigh, shaking his head.
"Unwilling to steal anyone else's thunder is more tike it,
and don't tell me the enemy wasn't counting on that
attitude as well. From now on we've all got to watch it, or
our own natures will do us in. Are we ready to go inside
now?"

None of us insisted on staying where we were, so we all
walked from the invisible floor through the wall into Cloud's
Heart, InThig going first. Once we were inside and standing
on a scintillating crystalline floor, Dranna gasped while Zail
whistled slowly, a perfect representation of me consensus
of opinion. Cloud's Heart was absolutely magnificent,
filled everywhere with the most spectacular beauty ever
created, its high walls and ceilings soaring, its furnishings
glowing jewel-like and perfect. Everything around us made
us want to stand and stare, and it was with a good deal of
difficulty that Su took up the trail again at last, forcing us
to follow.

If we had been attacked mere, in the midst of all that
beauty, it would certainly have been easier on us. As it
was it was all we could do to stay together, rather than
wander off alone along some shining, beckoning corridor.
InThig took it upon itself to^herd us along and not let
anyone stray, growling in disgust all the while, but it took
the sight of a floor-to-ceiling hanging of rubied lace to
bring me out of it. That hanging reminded me of the plane
on which I'd almost lost my life, and suddenly all the
beauty I'd been dazzled by receded just enough to let me
take a deep breath and blink the stardust out of my eyes.
Before coming in I'd prepared a couple of spells but hadn't
yet spoken them, and that sobered me even more than the
memory of near-death had done. I got the spells said fast
in a low voice, then took a minute to curse silently before
dimming everyone else's sight to bring them out of their
trances. We'd been subjected to a lot of ugliness in the
recent past, most of it our own doing, and then we'd been
surrounded by endless beauty. We'd been meant to suc-
cumb to me beauty in our haste to escape the memory of
ugliness, and if that isn't sneaking up from behind, I don't
know what is.

After that things went a little faster, if not exactly

336             SHARON GREEN

happier. There was no more lagging or daydreaming from
anyone—aside from Zail's very basic need to look at every
piece of magnificence we passed—but Rik was visibly
annoyed with himself for falling under the spell of loveli-
ness along with everyone else. The sight of his annoyance
pleased me no end, as there had been no end of annoyance
from him through the previous three -worlds. When he
hadn't been forcing me to take needed but unwanted naps.
he'd been telling me how happy he was going to make me
once the quest was over. He'd apparently learned his
lesson about starting things that made other people get the
urge to take a walk, but that hadn't kept him from coming
as close to me as often as he could. When InThig was
around he'd most often had other things to do, and that
had annoyed me even more-

The trail led to a wide stairway of marble, a handrail of
filigreed gold to the left, and we began climbing past
portraits on the right, renderings of the most beautiful
people, animals, creatures and things ever born or created.
The stairway went up and up, spiraling higher and higher,
until we came to another wide-corridored floor much the
same as the lower one. Again we walked through halls of
beauty, backdropped by the lustrous white of dreams and
fantasies, and then the real world returned when Su stopped
in front of wide double doors.

"Trail goes that way," she said, gesturing toward the
doors. "Should I keep following?"

"We'd better let Zail and Dranna do it," Rik decided
immediately, answering the question that had been ad-
dressed to him. "I find it hard to believe that it could be
this easy."

It wasn't that easy. Zail looked at the doors the way
he'd been looking at the works of art, his gray eyes bright
with appreciation, and then he pointed to an intricate
design in jade and onyx on the left hand door.

"Dranna, girl, do you think you can open that first?"
he asked, obviously seeing something the rest of us were
missing. I was being very careful not to use the Sight,
which meant I couldn't see any more than the others.

"Why, it is a lock, isn't it?" she answered as she

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

337

peered closer, sounding as pleased as Zail looked. "And
not a simple one. either. How delightful."

Without looking away from the design she removed two
slender somethings of metal from her dark curls, then
began touching them to me jewels of the design. Su,
Kadrim and 1 exchanged glances and faint shrugs, all three
of us obviously feeling the same way; our definition of
delightful and Dranna's didn't quite seem to match.

In an unbelievably short time we all heard a loud click.
and then Zail directed Dranna to the lock on the doors
themselves. The second click came even faster, but when
Dranna started toward the decoration on the righthand door
that matched the one on the left, Zail stopped her.

"Not that one, my sweet," he said with a grin, reaching
forward to throw open the doors. "The placement of that
one tells me it's set to undo the neutralizing produced by
opening the first two locks in their proper order. Save that
marvelous talent of yours for the next ones."

The "next ones" he referred to were the locks in the
next set of doors, no more than seven or eight feet past the
first set. We'd gained access to a small, featureless room
with nothing but the new doors in it, an accomplishment
only insofar as it brought us that much closer to the stone.

The next small room we gained access to had its doors
in the right-hand wall, the one after that to the left, and so
on in seemingly pattemless repetition. We passed through
room after room with Zail reading the locks and Dranna
opening them, and after a short while a stone of apprehen-
sion appeared to put an edge on our boredom. I'd lost
count of how many of the doors had had identical lock
patterns, and so, apparently, had Zail. His careful exami-
nations had degenerated to cursory inspections, the lure of
a challenge no longer there to capture his complete atten-
tion, and he had already gestured Dranna forward with
shrugging indifference when he suddenly stopped and put
a hand on her shoulder.

"Wait a minute," he said, frowning at the doors he'd
already looked at, stopping the rise of her slender metal
implements which had been nearly to the first lock. "Some-
tiling is faintly out of balance here, not quite right, not
what it should—"

338             SHARON GREEN

His words ended as he fell into that total absorption
which had characterized his inspections at the beginning,
and when he came out of it to turn back to us, his
handsome face was grim.

"The opening order is changed very slightly in these
doors," he announced, clear self-anger in his gray eyes- "If
1 hadn't caught the change they would have been opened in
the wrong order, and that would have caused—whatever
it's supposed to cause. All I can say is—I'm sorry."

"Why be sorry?" Rik asked immediately before anyone
else could speak, his amused satisfaction real. "You were
supposed to be bored to distraction by all the repetitions.
so badly bored that you let this change slip by. Since you
didn't let it slip by, what's there to be sony about?"

Zail looked at him for a long moment before a faint
smile came to his face, and very quietly he said, "Thanks,
Rik." Then he turned back to the doors, and gestured
Dranna forward again.

After that Zail practically took every door apart with his
eyes before letting Dranna near the locks, but he wasn't
the target any longer for our enemy's cute little tricks-
Two doors later we discovered that it was Dranna's turn,
when she opened a lock and then jumped back with a cry
of disgust.

"It's some kind of slime," Zail announced with vast
distaste, examining the awful-smelling substance that had
squirted out of the door pattern and over Dranna's hands
with the click of the lock snapping open- "What's it doing
to her?"

"It's not doing anything but making me sick." Dranna
answered for herself, pulling her arms out of Rik's con-
cerned grip to wipe her hands on her skirt. Her face was
still twisted into a look of extreme disgust, and her small
body was shuddering. After a few minutes she calmed
down enough to go on to the next lock, and I doubt if any
of us were surprised when the same thing happened again.
The second jetting was slightly different from the first, but
our eyes and noses told us it was no less foul.

"Dranna, why don't I make you a few pairs of gloves?"
1 suggested as 1 watched her frantically scrubbing her
hands on her skirt, her thin metal implements on the floor

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

339

where she'd dropped them, her skin taking on a definite
tinge of green. "That way it won't matter what comes out
of those doors."

"I can't work with gloves on," she whispered in an-
swer, struggling to control the illness rising inside of her,
"Any glove, no matter how thin, keeps me from feeling
the inside of the locks the way 1 have to. If 1 wear gloves,
I won't be able to open anything."

"And if you don't wear gloves, you won't want to open
anything," Rik muttered under his breath, turning away in
anger. It was fairly clear that his anger wasn't directed
toward Dranna, and needless to say, we all felt the same.
Even if we talked or bullied Dranna into trying anyway, it
was highly unlikely she would succeed. Her mind would
know that opening a lock meant instant nausea, which in
turn meant she would instantly find herself unable to open
anything.

The rest of us moved a few steps away to discuss the
problem, but there didn't seem to be much we could do. If
I tried using a very small sphere to ward Dranna's hands,
the warding was almost certain to interfere at least as much
as gloves. Breaking through the doors was possible, but
that was something the enemy^was obviously trying to
force us into, which meant it was the last thing we should
do. The only possibility left was for me to duplicate
Dranna's ability in myself, which was guaranteed to take a
good part of my strength. Creating tangible objects was
effortless when compared to creating an ability, but I
didn't see where I had much choice. Rik didn't like the
idea, Su went along with him, Kadrim and Zail were
undecided but unhappy, and InThig paced around with a
faint growl, trying to think of something else- I was grow-
ing very impatient with the lot of them, when a sudden,
unexpected interruption came,

"I think I'm ready to go on now," Dranna announced
from the door she was standing next to, her entire bearing
still showing her illness. "Which one do I do, Zail?"

Her most immediate answer was six pairs of eyes staring
at her, probably with mouths hanging open; Zail, having
been addressed, managed to recover first.

"The lower one," he answered faintly, then took one

340

SHARON GREEN

step forward with the hint of a headshake. "But I don't
understand. Do you mean to say you're going on anyway,
even though you know what will happen?"

"What else am I here for?" she asked in turn, trying not
to shudder at the "happening" Zail had referred to, "I
didn't go through all those terrible things just to give up
now, especially not when the enemy so obviously expects
me to do nothing else. He did this deliberately, to make
me sick enough to quit, and that's dirty. I'm going to keep
at it even if it kills me."

We all blinked at the fierce determination coming from
the small, pale woman, then set up a cheer that made her
turn away with a small laugh and a deep blush. There
hadn't been one of us who had expected her to go on, and
I was fairly sure she knew it. She could have used our lack
of belief in her as an excuse for making no further efforts,
but instead she'd turned her anger on the enemy and had
defeated his purpose. We all owed Dranna more than an
apology for what she'd done, and once we got back I
swore to myself that she would get it.

After that I stood near Dranna at the doors, and as soon.
as the slime sprayed out I vanished it, then cleaned what
had gotten on her before I could stop it. The routine helped
her only a small amount, but it didn't have to go on. for
very many doors. In a short while the horrible spraying
stopped, and we all began wondering what the next obsta-
cle would be.

The answer came when we stepped through the latest
doorway into an area much larger than the ones we'd
passed through, and saw that instead of there being only
one set of doors, now there were three. The ploy didn't
seem as terrible as it should have been, but when we
looked at Su, she shook her head with a frown.

"Don't know how it can be, but the trail goes to all of
those doors," she said, sounding more indignant than
upset. "How could the stone be behind three separate
doors?"

"It can't be," Rik growled, glaring at each door in turn.
"The stone was probably carried through all three door-
ways, but was left behind only one. All we have to do is
figure out which."

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

34*

No one was silly enough to suggest that we check them
all, not when we knew that opening the wrong door was
guaranteed to bring about something unpleasant. We had
one chance and only one, but tossing a coin looked to be
the most informative way of making the decision.

"There must be some indication of which door to
choose," InThig fretted in the heavy growl that was be-
coming more usual with it, moving only its head to study
each door in turn. "Are you still unable to see through
these walls, Laciel?"

"I really don't think I ought to try," I answered, swiv-
eling my head around the way everyone else was doing.
"I've thought of a way to get through the repetition spell
covering the outer walls, but it's a fairly obvious way once
you think about it, and that makes me suspicious. If I
manage to See through these walls, it might not turn out to
be the triumph we're expecting."

"That makes more sense than 1 like to think about,"
Rik muttered, one hand to his face as he studied the doors-
"Lead us all here, force the use of magic, and then—"
His hands went up in the air in an unspecified gesture, but
we all knew what he meant. The only thing capable of
keeping the game going was exactly the right move. "That
means we have to think our way eut, but we don't have
anything to think about. All we can do is imagine the stone
being carried from door to door—"

His words broke off as his eyes narrowed, he stood
thinking furiously for a short time, then said, "InThig!"
When the demon raised its head in a questioning way, the
only answer it got was the sight of the blurring which
presaged Rik's change into link-shape. Dranna muffled a
gasp and moved closer to Zail, but all the rest of us were
too busy wondering what was going on to pay any atten-
tion to her- In almost no time at all there was a great
bronze beast standing where Rik had been, and then he
and InThig were moving toward the set of doors on the
left.

The two four-footed members of our party took a good
twenty minutes or more examining me three doorways, but
at long last they finished whatever they'd been doing. Rik
blurred back into human shape, then looked down at InThig.

342

SHARON GREEN

"That has to be the one," he said, running a hand
through his dark hair. "What do you think?"

"The same," InThig agreed with a nod, the faintest
purr audible in its voice. "That was a very clever idea."

* 'If it was all that clever, how about letting the rest of us
in on it?" I suggested, resisting the temptation to add
certain verbal embellishments. That was no place to start
an argument, but the provocation was certainly there.

"It's very simple," Rik said, me pleasure in his bronze
eyes showing how much he had appreciated InThig's com-
pliment. "We know that the stone was carried up to two of
the doors, but it could only have been left behind one.
That means that the trail left by the person carrying the
stone would have to be different leading up to the proper
door—there's no other way it can be. It's not only me
stone itself that leaves a trail, it also causes whoever's
carrying it to leave a—scent -of sorts, the scent InThig
followed to find the gate we'd be using coming out of the
blind world. The door with the least or greatest or most
unbalanced scent has to be the door leading to the stone."

"I regret to say mat I find myself unable to follow you,
my friend," Kadrim said, voicing everyone's thoughts but
Su's. The big woman nodded with understanding, a faint
but definite smile on her face, but she was the only one of
us not totally lost-

"Look, you just have to think about what's necessary to
do what was so obviously done," Rik said, clearly trying
to explain to a nonswimmer just how easy diving is.
"Carrying the stone up to three doorways also means
carrying it away from only two, which would make the
proper doorway the one with the lightest scent. Or it
means carrying the stone up to the proper doorway twice,
which would make it the one with me heaviest scent. As a
last possibility it has to mean that the doorway with an
unbalanced scent, lacking the last time out, would be me
proper one, but I was hoping it wouldn't come down to
that fine a distinction. Happily it didn't, so I think we're
in. The doorway with the lightest scent is the one to the
left."

Once again looking at something became a group effort,
no one voicing any of the doubts they might have felt- I.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

343

myself, could think of two or three ways to throw Rik's
calculations out of whack, but 1 didn't care to mention
that. We had to have some basis for the door we chose,
and right then Rik's way was the only one we had.
?       "Well, nothing ventured, nothing gained," Zail quoted
'"     in a mutter after taking a deep breath, then he turned to
Dranna with the beginnings of a gleam in his eye. "Or, if
you prefer, in for a lamb, in for a sheep. Are you with me,
sweetheart?"

^       "I think I'd rather be behind you," Dranna answered,
^    making us all chuckle, but she hadn't been joking- She
^    followed Zail cautiously as he strode to the lefthand set of
jg.    doors, and 1 surreptitiously braced myself. If that was
where the stone was, then that might very well be IT.

Zail studied the doors the way he had the outer palace
wall, taking almost as much time and doing just as little.
As a final effort he went to one knee and examined the
floor under the priceless carpeting we stood on, then looked
up at us with a shake of his head.

"There doesn't seem to be anything on either of these
doors, not even an ordinary, run-of-the-mill lock," he
said, not pleased but also not uncertain. "Shall I do the
honors again?"              ^

"No, this time it's my turn," I said before anyone
else—like Rik—could voice an opinion. "Step back, please,
Zail. I get to do this alone."

I moved toward the doors with a great show of confi-
dence and assurance, two things I would have needed
magic to produce in myself just then. That innocent door
had to be an invitation, and if my suspicions were right,
then I had a date that had been set quite some time earlier.
Zail stood up and gave ground just as I'd asked him to,
and despite the beginnings of protests I could hear behind
me, I put my hands on both doorknobs and pushed the
doors wide.

To find nothing but an empty, candle-lit room that was
black as the rest of the palace was white.

"Could—that—be it?" Zail asked in a very hushed
voice from behind my right shoulder, his tone the closest
to reverent I had ever heard it to be. The room was empty
of what / had been expecting to find, but it did hold a slim

344

SHARON GREEN

pedestal in its center, one that seemed to be carved out of a
single diamond, and on the pedestal sat a small, silver-
trimmed blue box.

"Unless there's a gate, that's got to be it," Su said from
behind me to the left, her voice more relieved than rever-
ent. "The trail goes right up to that stand and then ends."

"Then what are we waiting for?" Zail demanded with
laughing eagerness replacing the awe. "Let's go get it."

"We're waiting for mis," I said, putting up my left
hand while my right arm kept him from moving past me,
The gesture I made linked in one of my previous spells
with a flash of bright orange, just the way it was supposed
to, and then I was able to relax. I'd more than half
expected the stone to be snatched away as soon as it was in
our reach, but my spell had just negated any such effort
and had proved beyond doubt that our quest had been
successful- The stone was ours now, and whatever else the
enemy had in mind would no longer involve the object of
our search.

With me necessary done we all entered me room, me to
move around studying the smooth black walls, everyone
else crowding around me pedestal to make satisfied noises
over the silver and blue box. Or almost everyone else. I
looked down from one section of the ceiling to find Rik
standing next to me with folded arms, inspecting me the
way I was inspecting the room.

"Find what you were looking for?" he asked in a very
casual, friendly way, then shook his head in answer to his
own question. "No, you couldn't have, or you wouldn't
still be looking. I'm not too bad at finding things- If you
tell me what it is, I'll be glad to help."

"Thanks anyway," I said, turning to move away from
him. "I prefer handling it alone."

"The way you preferred being the one to open me doors?"
the pest pursued, following after me as though he were on
a string. "What you're looking for couldn't have anything
to do with that, could it? You couldn't possibly have
expected to find our enemy in here?"

"It was a logical expectation, but it looks like I was
wrong," 1 answered with a shrug, silently cursing him for
figuring it out. If he got in the way—! "What 1 didn't

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

345

I

Tri
fc
t

expect was to have the stone simply handed over to us. It
doesn't make any sense."

"What doesn't make sense is the fact mat people let you
run around loose without a nursemaid," he growled, pull-
ing me about by one arm to face his growing anger.
"There are seven people in our group, and you were going
to face the enemy alone? Have you gone completely in-
sane? Are you trying to get yourself killed? Do you think
you can just . . ."

"Stop yelling at me!" I snapped, trying to pull my arm
out of his grip. "The enemy is a magic user and so am 1;

how many of the rest of you are? What do you think you
can do against someone who's sorcerer or wizard level?
Tire him out by making him snuff you? Don't you see how
absurd you're being?"

"All 1 can see is how thick-headed you're being," he
retorted, his fingers still tight around my arm, his bronze
eyes blazing. "No matter how good you think you are,
you can't face the enemy alone! The rest of us aren't as
helpless as you believe, but even so your wizard would be
an even better ally. We're going to stop looking for trouble
and take the stone back, and then we can ..."

"I ask your pardon for interrupting, yet there is a matter
you may wish to see to," Kadrim's voice came, more
worried in general man worried over interrupting. We
turned our heads to see Su standing with him, her own
expression somewhat sober, and Rik's band finally left my
arm.

"What's wrong?" he asked, immediately sharing the
bigger man's worry. "Have you found signs of—?"

"No, no, we have found naught of the enemy," Kadrim
answered quickly, apparently having overheard some part
of our recent exchange. "The difficulty lies with Zail and
Dranna, and the needs which suddenly took them as they
approached the container of the stone. Dranna looked upon
the container, saw a lock more complex than any before it,
and immediately voiced a need to try her skill against it.
Su and I felt such a course of action might perhaps be
unwise, yet Zail spoke words of encouragement, for he
was gripped by the need to see the beauty contained
within. Perhaps they should not . . ."

346              SHARON GREEN

"They're trying to open it?" 1 choked out, suddenly ill
with the realization that there had been one more trap.
"Quick! We've got to stop them, we can't let it happen—!"

I broke off and began pushing my way frantically be-
tween the big man and woman, desperate to get to Zail and
Dranna before they fell into me trap all the way, but it was
already too late. Even as 1 took the first step toward them,
Dranna voiced an "Ahhh!" of delight and Zail extended
his arm with a grin, and men the top of the blue and silver
box was thrown back and away.

No one has ever been able to decide whether it's sight of
the stone which captures you first, or hearing its song that
does it. The stone was no larger than a palm-sized rock,
but beside it the diamond pedestal it rested on grew dull,
and awkward, and uninteresting. Light flared in colors like
a joyous greeting, colors so heartbreakingly beautiful that
death would have been preferable to looking away. It
glowed with the shine of a raindrop on grass, light, grace-
ful, achingly lovely, and even as our eyes feasted, our
bodies thrilled to its song. Each note was a liquid rendition
of the sight we gloried in, spreading all through us with
the love of the universe, all pain washed away forever,
none to ever come again. We stood transfixed, endlessly
grateful to be held so, willing to continue on like that till
all life everywhere faded and died. My eyes closed but I
lost nothing of sight and sound, nothing of ecstasy beyond
description, and then—

And then the world ended with screams and shouts of
heartrending protest, mine among them, and my eyes flew
open to see the black form with blazing red eyes flowing
down and away from the reclosed box. I shuddered even
as 1 screamed again, but in the far distance I heard another
scream, one of rage and frustration, one so filled with hate
that to hear it was to be given pain. The candles in the
black room blazed like fountains of fire, thunder-claps
sounded with the fury of destruction, and then all of me
palace exploded around us, collapsing and dying and fall-
ing away until it abruptly disappeared. Cloud's Heart be-
came one with the clouds it was able to rest upon no

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        ,4,

longer, and the ensuing silence was more deafening than
the previous bedlam.

"It's all right now, I think it's over," a voice said from
very close beside me, and it suddenly came to me that I
stood trembling in Rik's arms, my face buried against his
chest. With the sound of that scream still ringing in my
mind, the last thing 1 wanted to do was raise my head and
look around, but of course that was the first thing mat had
to be done- 1 had to make sure that everyone was all right,
and when 1 finally managed to look around it seemed that
they were. Kadrim and Su stood together, apparently lean-
ing on each other, and Zail and Dranna were doing the
same. InThig was floating in vapor shape, looking us all
over with concern, and aside from we seven and the box
containing the balance stone, nothing was left. We all
floated above cloud-swirled emptiness, seven sparks of life
left all alone.

"What in me name of the Blue Firefall happened?" Zail
demanded weakly, looking around in bewilderment as
Dranna clung to him. "What was it?"

"Which time?" Rik asked in turn, trying to sound light-
hearted and amused, but not quite making it. lt! think we
now know what would have happened if we'd made any
mistakes coming in, but as far as the rest of it goes—'*

He shook his head, admitting himself out of his depth,
and that brought everyone's eyes to me. They were all
unnaturally still, making no effort to move even an inch
from where they stood—or floated—and that was com-
pletely understandable.

"Before I answer your questions, let me assure you that
you can all relax," I said, pushing away from Rik to
demonstrate that normal walking was possible. "When we
first entered the palace 1 had the feeling that something
like this might be done, so I took a precaution. I gave each
of you your own invisible floor to stand on, complete with
warding, and simply meshed the invisible floors in with
the palace floors. You wouldn't have known they were
there if you hadn't needed them, but unfortunately it didn't
work out that way."

"Worked out pretty fortunately as far as I can see," Su
commented. Joining Kadrim in looking down. "Heights

348

SHARON GREEN

never bother me—as long as I don't have to fall through
them. What happened with Zail and Dranna?"

"They walked into a very faint, very simple spell," I
answered, really feeling disgusted with myself. "Their
warding wouldn't have allowed anything harmful to reach
them, but the spell didn't contain anything harmful. All it
did was intensify one certain aspect of their natures, the
same aspect that made each of them perfect for this quest—
and me same aspects that almost destroyed us all- Dranna
just had to accept the challenge of the lock keeping the
box closed, and Zail just had to look at the perfection
inside. If I'd had any brains I would have anticipated
something like that, and not left the saving of our necks to
chance."

"I would hardly call my deliberate, well-thought-out
actions no more than chance," InThig put in in injured
tones, a black cloud of offended indignation. "I believe
we discussed the matter of anticipating the unanticipated,
and concluded that an effort to do so would have been a
complete waste of time. We need only be thankful that life
forms such as I am are not as susceptible to the Tears of
the Mist as your own, and for that reason I was able to
close the box again. I must admit it took some effort, but 1
was not about to spend eternity in thrall to the work of the
EverNameless."

"I guess mat told you," Rik murmured only loud enough
for me to hear, forcing me to swallow a smile, and then he
cleared his throat and went on in a more normal voice.
"But there's still something I don't understand. I'm as-
suming it was the enemy who blasted the palace apart
around us, but then everything disappeared. Why should
something like that have happened, and how did you Tmow
the enemy was somewhere around here?"

"It was obvious from the very first that the enemy had
to be here," I told him. rubbing at my forehead with one
hand. "The palace had been created here, and something
that's created has to be maintained. An underling might
have been left to do the maintaining, but that wouldn't
have allowed the enemy a first-hand look at the end of this
game. It was always possible for us to win, but me enemy
didn't think we would; he was counting on destroying us

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

349

just when we thought we'd succeeded. That's why he got
so wild and blew up the palace around us, hoping to catch
us that way, and gated out fast when it didn't work- As
soon as he was gone, even the blasted remnants of the
palace disappeared."

"Do you mean mat the person who was willing to kill a
world to get even with one man, is the same person who
created all that beauty?" Dranna asked, still shivering
against Zail. "How can that possibly be true? How can
such ugliness and loveliness exist in the same mind?"

"That's something we'll find out as soon as we get the
stone back to Graythor," I said, using the chaining spell
I'd put on the box to draw it over to me- "There are a
number of questions he hasn't yet answered, but I intend
seeing that changed. If nothing else, we've earned that
much."

There was an air of uncertainty in the silence around
me, an attitude that said you didn't demand answers from
a wizard; under most circumstances that was true enough,
but I no longer had patience for most circumstances. First
we would get the stone back, and men we would leam
why we'd had to go through all that.

CHAPTER 14

Getting back to the gate was a bit nerve-racking for my
companions, but once we were on solid ground they felt a
good deal better. We retraced our steps through the third
quiet world to the second, and then InThig mentioned that
it knew a shortcut back to the world where we'd left the
horses. I stopped to get some sleep before we tried its
version of a shortcut, but the new route turned out to be
much better than the original. On one of the four worlds
we came under magical attack from living sand, but InThig
had warned me beforehand and I was prepared. The rest of
the four were no trouble at all, and we stepped out of the
gate near our horses* pasture in less than half the time it
had taken going the other way. We all greeted our mounts,
who looked sassy and ready after their rest, and then we
went into our newly created camp to get some rest of our
own.

It had just about gotten to be full dark on that world,
and the night sky above was showing a sprinkling of stars
in just one small area, with all the rest of it an uninter-
rupted black. It looked to be a very lonely sky with so few
stars, and I hurried into my pavilion before tile chill of it
could touch me. Inside it was bright and cozy with a good
meal just waiting to be eaten, and even better than that
there was a tub full of hot water. I used the wash water,
put on my robe, ate my meal, then sat down on the settle
with a glass of wine in my hand and InThig reflectively

350

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

351

quiet at my feet. We had been discussing the fact that soon
we would be back at our starting point, and then the others
would be able to return to their own worlds. All the others. . .

"I wanted to knock, but silk doesn't do well with that
sort of thing," a quiet, self-assured voice said from the
tent entrance. "May I come in?"

I looked up to see the same quiet, self-assured smile on
Zail's face, his body wrapped in a clean, comfortable robe
like mine, his gray eyes taking in nothing but me. In actual
fact I would have preferred being alone, but with the quest
journey just about over, there was no need to insult anyone.

"Certainly you may," I answered with what I hoped
was a friendly but neutral tone, not missing the way
InThig raised its head from its paws without commenting.
"Would you like a glass of wine?"

"I don't think I'd better," Zail said, crossing the floor
to sit down next to me on the settle. "My head is already
swimming, just from the sight of you. Wine on top of that
would be like adding a cupful of water to the ocean."

"Oh," I said, looking down from those beautiful gray
eyes to wonder what else I might say. I'd thought offering
a glass of wine would be safe enough, but the warmth in
my cheeks told me how wrong ffiat guess had been. Maybe
a comment about the weather. . . 7

"This journey is nearly over, and we still haven't bad
that private dinner we promised ourselves," Zail said,
moving just a little closer to me, his voice a velvet mur-
mur. "It might be a good idea if we pretend that we just
had that dinner, and go on from there. Have I told you
what a beautiful woman you are, Laciel, and how my heart
thuds like mad every time you stand anywhere near me?
Here, you can feel it going right now—'*

He took my free right hand and began raising it toward
the front of his robe, obviously meaning to put it inside,
against his chest- I knew he was under a spell and I didn't
want to hurt him, and I also didn't want to act like a foot
of an infant and snatch my hand back. The glass of wine in
my left hand felt like a weighted shackle, chaining me in
place, and I didn't know what I could do except sit there
and watch my hand being moved closer and closer to
him. . . .

SHARON GREEN

352

"Perhaps you ought to see a physician about the condi-
tion when you return to your world," InThig said suddenly
and very laconically, causing Zail to drop my hand as
though it had burned him. "A difficulty with one's heart
is often a serious matter."

"InThig," Zail said, looking down at the demon with
an expression that led me to believe his heart really was
racing. "You startled me, speaking up like that without
warning. I don't know how I could have forgotten you
were there."

"I've learned that there are some people who regard me
as no more than the animal shape I choose to wear,"
InThig answered, quite a lot of teeth showing beneath its
blazing red eyes. "Of course, I'm sure such an outlook
doesn't apply to you, Zail, so you may certainly disregard
my mention of it."

"Of course," Zail echoed with a sickly smile, then he
seemed to pull himself together a little. "InThig my friend,
Laciel and I have been trying to be alone together almost
since this journey first began. Since we're rapidly running
out of time, we'd really appreciate it if you would take a
walk for a while—say, for about an hour or so? As a
favor from one quest companion to another?"

"Quest companions may always ask favors of one an-
other," InThig returned, stirring not an inch from where it
lay. "Unfortunately, Laciel and I now guard me balance
stone, therefore is it necessary that we both remain in this
pavilion. It was very thoughtful of you to come and visit
with us, considering the fact that we can't go to anyone. It
will relieve the boredom for Laciel."

"Yes, well, I do usually try to be thoughtful." Zail
said, the new smile on his face just the neutral one I'd
been trying for. "I wanted to make sure Laciel was all
right, and now that I see she is, I think I'll be going."

"Oh, we wouldn't hear of your leaving so soon," InThig
said very smoothly, half rising just as Zail began to get to
his feet. "We insist you stay a while, and join our
conversation."

"Join your conversation," Zail said, carefully watching
two rows of very sharp teeth as he sank back down on the

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

353

settle. "Join your conversation. Certainly. Maybe I will
have just a little of that wine after all."

1 went to pour a second glass of wine, wondering what
InThig could be up to, but I wasn't able to figure it out. It
kept Zail with us for more than the hour he'd asked for^
prodding the conversation every time it faltered, which
was rather often. Once the man had been allowed to
escape, I tried to get to the bottom of the mystery by
asking, but demons are famous for avoiding straight an-
swers. By then I was too sleepy to press the point, so I
simply went to bed and forgot about it.

Until me following "day." Once we were mounted we
followed InThig toward a different gate than the one we'd
used to reach that world, a gate that would let us avoid the
blind world and the ones before it as well. It was still just
about nightfall on that world, giving us the feeling that
time was standing still for all the universe, and after a
short while 1 became aware of the fact that someone was
riding next to me in the dark. I turned my head to see Rik
staring at me in silence, his features hard to make out but
his face definitely pointing toward me, the light, bantering I
attitude he'd been using with me recently no longer apparent.

"I suppose I can't make too much of a fuss about it,"
he said at last, his voice strangely quiet. "Zail promised to
wait until the quest was over, and last night was close
enough to it. You—let him stay a lot longer than you did
me. Is he—that much better, then?"

I put forward my own silence at that, finally understand-
ing that Rik must have been watching my tent the night
before—and InThig had known about it. That had to be the
reason why it had refused to let Zail leave at once; It had
been trying to make Rik believe there was a man in my
life, and because of that the bronze-eyed man would be
wise to leave me alone. It had been a much more useful
ploy than InThig knew—especially since everyone was so
close to going home.

"Is Zail better than you?" I repeated his question after a
moment, keeping my voice steady for the sake of the man
who had saved my life on the blind world. "In all honesty
I'd have to say there's really no comparison."

"I see," he said, the words a whisper in the night. "It

354

SHARON GREEN

looks like you were right all along, then. 1 wish you two
well, and I hope you'll excuse me for having bothered
you."

His horse increased its pace and pulled away from mine,
moving up toward where InThig was leading the way, the
double form of rider and mount a smoothly flowing shadow.
I stirred in my saddle and put a hand to my gray's mane,
stroking it gently through a sudden need for companion-
ship. I knew Rik would be much better off after what I'd
said, that he'd be relieved once the spell was off him, but
it's never easy to give someone mat kind of hurt. Even
though I knew beyond doubt that he didn't even like me,
what I'd done still must have—hurt.

It didn't take long to get to InThig's gate, and the
distances across the next two worlds were equally as short.
The enemy had lengthened the trip out for the purpose of
attack against us, and there was no need to follow me
same route back. The final gate transfer brought us back to
my world on the far side of Geddenburg in middle morn-
ing, and emergence was something of a shock. Instead of
the pretty green woods that usually stood about five miles
from the city, we came out into charred, blackened ruin
that seemed to be not long removed from the smoldering
stage. The horses shied nervously at the smell of recent
fire, and then we all felt the tremor that gently shook the
ground.

"It's already started," I said in upset, putting a hand to
my mount's neck to calm him. "The instability is begin-
ning to shatter the world."

"We'd better hurry, then." Rik said as the others made
sounds of shared upset, but it was easier said than dose.
We mounted up and made our cautious way through the
blackened stumps toward the road that led to the city, but
the road was clogged with what seemed like half of all
humanity, some of them streaming out of the cityf some
streaming in- There were also knots of people arguing
about which would be safer, being out in the countryside
when the rest of it went up in flames, or being in the city
when the buildings began to collapse. 1 touched my hand
to the small box belted at my waist, then urged roy mount
into the flow heading toward the city.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

355

The gate guards, when we finally reached them, were
few in number, harried, and putting their brawn behind
what was probably a brand-new city edict: anyone could
leave if they allowed their personal effects to be searched,
but no one was being permitted into the city. The regula-
tions were obviously aimed toward keeping looting down,
but the gate guards weren't the sort to interpret their orders
even if they'd had the time. No one was going in through
their gate, the big section leader informed us, and that was
coldly and definitely that.

Kadrim growled and reached for his sword, Su and Zail
did the same without the vocal comment, and Rik drew
himself up with glowing eyes while Dranna looked indig-
nant. After everything we'd been through they weren't
about to be held up by petty officialdom, but I knew that
starting a brawl at the gate would only have wasted time—
almost as much as trying to tell them what we were there
for- Considering the way I felt about city Guardsmen I
wouldn't have minded turning my quest companions loose
on them, but there was a better way.

Once we'd moved through the final gate, InThig had
returned to vapor form and had put itself into a large
leather pouch I'd hung from my saddle beside my right
knee. The people of my world tended to become upset at
me sight of a demon, and there had really been no need to
add to their turmoil; now, however, 1 had found a reason
for selective turmoil at the very least.

"But we've come to bring something to the wizard
Graythor," 1 protested before any weapons were drawn,
coating the words heavily with innocence. "If you won't
let us take it to him, then you'll have to do it."

"What—sort of something?" the section leader asked,
immediately suspicious and wary. Ordinary people tried to
have as little to do with wizards as possible, and the
altitude usually extended to the possessions of wizards.

"Just this," I answered, lifting the flap of the pouch
and holding it open for him to look inside. He approached
my horse with only a bit of reluctance, willing to make the
effort as long as he didn't have to put his hands into or on
anything before checking it out, and peered inside- What
met his glance was a pair of burning red eyes surrounded

356             SHARON GREEN

by thick, roiling black, and the man didn't even have
enough control of himself to gasp as his face went pasty
yellow. He stood frozen in place, wide eyes locked into
staring, and didn't move until I reclosed the flap on the
pouch. Then he scrambled back, his look at me no longer
dismissive, his dark eyes no longer officiously cold.

"Let them through," he ordered his men hoarsely, well
aware of the way they were staring at him. "On my
responsibility, let them through."                *

"But what about me edict?" one of the men protested,
his assistant section leader. "It said no one at all . . .'*

"1 said let them through!" the leader snapped, his face
beginning to go dark again. "Or do you want to be the one
to carry that—that—thing—for her?"

"If there's only one pouch, why does it take six of them
to deliver it?" the assistant persisted, a smaller man who
was just short of stout, probably the brother-in-law or
nephew of someone high in the city government. "One
pouch, one rider, and the rest of them can stay outside. Of
course, I'd never say anything, but if word got back to the
commander mat you let all those people in for no reason. . ."

"AH right, all right, have it your way," the leader
grudged, hating taking orders from a subordinate but'clearly
having no choice. "Let the girl through, and the others
can. . ."

"No," I interrupted, totally out of patience and not
about to be pushed around by a worm with connections. I
looked at the small, smug man in the uniform I had such
fond childhood memories of, pointed at him, then spoke a
spell. He yelped as five leather pouches materialized out of
the air and dropped on his head, then paled when he
looked back at me to see the palmful of blue fire I now
held.

"You wanted five more pouches, now you have five
more pouches," 1 told him, pinning him with the touchi-
ness in my stare. "Either you say all of us are allowed
through the gate, or 1*11 ask someone else for permission—
after you're no longer able to lodge any complaints. Give
me your answer fast."

"Yes, yes, all of you can come in!" the man babbled,
backing away and nearly tripping over one of the pouches

THE PAR SIDE OF FOREVER

357

I'd dumped on him. "On my responsibility, please, on my
responsibility!"

I closed my hand on the blue fire, making it disappear,
then urged my gray forward with a touch of my heel. The
people still outside the gate were laughing and sounding
catcalls, making me need to raise my voice a little as I
passed the group leader.

"If I were you, I'd report him for disobeying orders," I
advised, watching him fight to keep from laughing like
everyone else. "If he stays on the street in uniform, he
won't live longer than a couple of weeks."

I was beyond the man by then with my companions
following, so he had no chance to answer even if he'd
wanted to- Whether he took my advice or left his assistant
right where he was, depended on whether or not he would
be blamed for the smaller man's certain death. It was none
of my business, though, and I had enough to concern me
that certainly was.

"Don't know why you didn't just break that gate down,"
Su said as she drew her horse up beside mine, an uncharac-
teristic annoyance in her. "Places all gated and walled
never did feel right to me."

"1 would have loved to, btft I couldn't," I answered,
more than sharing her annoyance. "Magic users take an
oath when they begin their studies, to obey the laws of the
city and defer to its officials. If you want to be technical
my oath is now a little bent, but not without reason. I think
you'd better pass the word back to everyone to be ready
for anything."

She looked at me with startled surprise, but didn't waste
any time asking questions 1 wasn't yet prepared to answer.
Or, possibly, couldn't yet answer- There were a number of
things bothering me. odd incidents and unbalanced hap-
penings, and the last part of our journey wasn't going as
smoothly as I'd thought it would. I needed to get to the
question-answering time that would come after the balance
stone was back in place, but I had the distinct feeling there
were still a number of incidents between me and that
long-awaited time.

The streets of the city were as crowded as they usually
were, but not in the usual way. People moved along

358

SHARON GREEN

carrying bundles or riding carts, obviously on their way to
one of the city gates, mutters rising among them every
time a tremor shook me cobbles under them- Those who
stood around talking or arguing went silent at the tremors.
and afterward looked even more worried than before. La-
borers and clerks and apprentice craftsmen might be free to
take their families and leave, but men who had businesses
or were responsible for some vital city function didn't yet
have that option. The tremors didn't yet seem strong enough
to have shaken down any of the heavy stone buildings of
which most of me city was constructed, so all they could
do was wait—and hope things got better before they got
worse.

The deeper we rode into me city, the more me crowds
thinned—and the more the number of Guardsmen increased.
Most of them had groups of people in chains, street people
who had been incautious enough to drift over to the wealth-
ier part of the city in anticipation of disaster they could
take advantage of. They were being rounded up as fast as
they showed themselves, but that still left me ones who
weren't stupid enough or careless enough to show them-
selves. My own party drew a few narrow-eyed stares, but
none of the patrols made any attempt to stop us; we were
well-mounted and well-armed, and looters and sneak thieves
were rarely either.

Graythor's city house wasn't really his, but belonged to
the Guardian of the Tears, whoever that happened to be. It
stood in a square in the middle of a quiet residential area,
surrounded by high-walled houses belonging to the city's
wealthy and well-placed, an area that was now even qui-
eter than it usually was- Heavy wood and metal gates
closed off access to the neighboring houses, and when we
rode into the wizard's courtyard, I found that everyone
was looking around as carefully as Rik.

"I really don't like the way mis place feels," he said,
looking as though he were trying to see through the stone
and plaster around us. "Are you absolutely sure the wizard
is here?"

"I tied to his trace as soon as we came through me
gate," I answered, dismounting with a frown for roe heavy,

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

359

brooding silence. "He's here, all right, but 1 don't under-
stand why his servants aren't ..."

A sudden shout interrupted me, and then there were men
coming at us from all directions, men armed with swords.
They lacked the glazed look of those under a compulsion,
but that doesn't mean they could be ignored or dismissed.
There were a lot more than a dozen of them, and their
shouts scattered the horses, but not before everyone had
dismounted—including InThig. It settled to me ground and
solidified to cat shape while the attackers grimly pretended
not to see it, but it didn't move immediately to join the
battle.

"Laciel, stop playing around and get the stone inside,"
it growled with swishing tail while two of the attackers
foolishly trying to close with me went up in blue flames.
"We can handle these without you, so go ahead but be
careful.'"

It then launched itself into the melee, pleased to purring
that the attackers weren't simply running at sight of it,
joining the rest of our companions who were already busy
swinging their weapons. I hesitated no more than an in-
stant, knowing InThig was right even if 1 didn't like it, then
grabbed Dranna's arm and putted her along with me to-
ward the house. She'd been standing helplessly behind me
during the fight, and would be better off inside and out of
the way no matter how things went.

I had to flame another two attackers before we made it
to the house, gesturing the door open just before we
reached it so that we could scramble inside and slam it
closed behind us. With the thick wood and metal door shut
the sounds of fighting were abruptly cut off, returning us
to the heavy, uneasy silence of a few minutes earlier. It
practically rang through the large entrance hall, and when I
gestured to Dranna to stay where she was, she made no
attempt to argue. All our opposition wasn't outside with
the others, and I think we both knew that.

Graythor's trace said he was somewhere above, proba-
bly in his workshop, so that was where 1 had to go. My
boots were loud on the tiles as I crossed the entrance hall
to the wide stairway, but I climbed it fast and reached the
carpeting of the second floor before the sound got to me. I

360             SHARON GREEN

knew that house well from many years of visiting and
exploring, but I couldn't remember it ever feeling so dead
and empty, even when the small army of servants hadn't
been there- The wall hangings were normally conservative
rather than dark, the carved doors leading to guest rooms
had never brooded, and the small-flamed lamps spaced
along the walls had never seemed on the verge of threaten-
ing to go out all at once. It came to me that that whole
atmosphere of dread had to be deliberate, and then it came
to me that I was more annoyed than frightened, 1'don't
enjoy that sort of game-playing, especially not when I'm
the butt of the joke, and I couldn't wait to make that very
clear to whoever was behind it all.

The narrower stairway leading to the third floor was at
the end of the hall, and although the closed-in area had no
windows, it was normally well lit. This time when 1 turned
into it I found it pitch black, the door at the top closed and
no light leaking from under it. My annoyance flared even
higher at such childish theatrics and I moved to take the
steps two at a time just to show my disdain, but with my
foot on the bottom tread a thought came to stop me. There
had been a number of personal attacks during the quest
journey, and those personal attacks had shown a knowl-
edge of the characters of the people under attack, a knowl-
edge of how they would probably act in a given situation.
Running disdainfully up those stairs in the dark was per-
fectly in line with my own character, and who else would
it be coming up them but the one most familiar with
Graythor and the house? I had to admit I was too stubborn
to have learned much during our journey, but I had learned
a small amount of caution.

I was beginning to regret all the energy I'd carelessly
expended that day, but I still spoke a word to create a
small, private sun. The immediate glare of it made me
squint, but as soon as my eyes adjusted I saw mat that
particular energy expenditure couldn't be considered wasted.
Right in the middle of the twelve-step flight, three of the
steps had been completely removed, leaving a gaping hole
no disdainfully hurrying young sorceress could possibly
have missed. Kilting a magic user isn't easily done, but

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

361

even the most powerful wizard ever bom will succumb to
an unprepared-for broken neck.

I took a deep breath and considered dousing my sun,
then left it where it was and began climbing the stairs,
putting my own step in the middle of the opening and
getting past it that way. I made it to the top without further
incident, reached for the doorknob, then drew my hand
back and gestured the door open. The rules of the game
had now been changed, and if there was one thing I
recognized, it was go-for-broke.

Graythor's third-floor workshop was usually lit by magic,
which made it unnecessary to unshutter the windows or
light the few candles the large room boasted. As I stepped
through the doorway I could see that only those few
candles were lit, which gave the shadowed room a feeling
of emptiness and cobwebs rather than me bright neatness it
usually had. Over near the wall to my right, directly
beneath one of the candles, me real body of Graythor lay
very still on a slab of stone, as empty-seeming and dead as
the rest of the house. I knew I was probably expected to
rush right over there, but instead I moved farther into the
room and glanced around the shadows.

"Unless you have a special entry prepared, mis time
you can't run," 1 said with all the obnoxiousness I was
capable of, finding the patch of shadow I was looking for
and staring straight at it. "I know you're very much afraid
of me, but this time you'll have to force yourself to face
me."

"Afe, afraid of you?" a surprising voice answered, a
voice filled with outrage and scorn. "The day will never
come when I'm afraid of a mere child, a crude beginner!
Luck and the presence of the others saved you until now,
but that's all over with. Now I will crush you!"

Having detected the presence of an entry, I'd been
afraid the enemy would use it, but the figure stepped
forward out of the shadows, committing to another course,
just as I'd wanted, A casual flick of my finger, easily
missed in me purposely-created gloom, sent the entry far
enough out of line to be useless as an escape hatch, and
then I gave all my attention to the one who had caused so
much misery and pain. We'd mentioned the enemy many

362             SHARON GREEN

times during the journey, saying he'd done this or had
wanted that; the truth of the matter was that he'd done
nothing.

She had.

"You're startled and surprised," the woman said, a
spiteful smile on her very beautiful face. "I led you through
a dozen different worlds, and still you never guessed.
You're not very bright, are you?"

"Apparently not," I said with a shrug, studying, her
thick, glorious black hair and honey-colored eyes, her
small but very well-made body, her beautiful fur-trimmed
red riding outfit, the grace and elegance in her least move-
ment or gesture. "To tell the truth, it never occurred to me
that any woman could be so warped. I've heard it said that
women aren't better or worse than men, only worse, and
you seem to prove the contention."

"I'm not only better man men, I'm also better man
other women," she said with a very ladylike snort of
disdain, dismissing what I'd said to anger her as though
I'd been referring to someone else. "I happen to be per-
fect, more perfect than anyone ever bom or created, more
perfect than you're capable of understanding. There's never
been anyone like me, or ever will be again."

"Perfect," I repeated with more nausea than pity. and
then I really heard something else she'd said. "Wait a
minute, what did you mean, born or created? I know of
only one world whose people are created, and they aren^t
really alive—or in any way human. On this world people
aren't created, they're—"

I broke off when I saw the secret, triumphant look on
her face, the look that said I'd picked up on exactly what
she'd wanted me to, something she hadn't wanted to say
straight out. But was that what it was? That she'd, some-
how been created? Considering the power and ability it
would take to create an actual, living person, I was some-
what skeptical about the truth in that—and then I stiffened
as another idea came to me, one that began to answer a
few questions.

"Yes?" she prompted very brightly, moving a slow step
to her left so that more of the candlelight would fall on
her. "Was there a question you had?"

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        363

"No, more like a belated guess," 1 said with a headshake,
making sure I kept her the center of my attention. "Your
comment about being created— You were able to steal the
balance stone because it was Graythor who created you,
wasn't it? He told you how to approach the Tears, and you
used that against him.**

"I really do think I must take back what I said about
your not being bright," she crooned, all the triumph in the
universe blazing out of her eyes. "Yes, it was Graythor
who created me, but I'm not able to say that to anyone
who doesn't already know, and until now there was no one
but Graythor himself. How absolutely delicious that soon
the whole world witi know, that he created not only a
woman, but one with the Sight. Then they'll also know
how I was able to simply walk away with the balance
stone."

"Because he couldn't bring himself to stop you," I said
with another nod, raising my hands to rub at my arms-
"And your being Sighted means you maintain your exis-
tence spell all alone, without needing him always near
you. That was probably his second biggest mistake."

"He said something very much like that just before I
took the stone," she pouted, and men suddenly her entire
attitude changed. All the pettiness and high-handedness
melted completely out of her face and bearing, and nothing
was left but a very small, very beautiful woman. "Oh, I
try to put on a brave front, but you have no idea how
horrible it's been for me," she said, the expression in her
eyes now very soft and very sober. "He taught me every-
thing I wanted to know about magic, but he refused to let
me out of his sight, refused to let me associate with other
magic users. For years I was his prisoner, locked away
here or in one of his other houses, no one but servants or
stablehands to talk to if I grew bored. And then, when the
day finally came that he showed me the—the real reason
he'd created me, not as a companion but as—a—a—victim,
I knew I had to do something to escape him, and to tell the
world what he's really like! I had to show everyone, in the
most public way possible, and that's what I did!"

She was gently wringing her delicate hands now, misery
flowing out of her like an aura, a pleading for belief

364             SHARON GREEN

putting a glint of tears in her lovely eyes. I doubted there
were more than a dozen people anywhere, mate or female,
who wouldn't have opened their arms wide to offer her
what comfort they could, just as they would have done
with a poor, injured fawn.

"No wonder he refused to let you associate with other
magic users," I observed, my cool answer putting a hint
of surprise in those lovely, tear-bright eyes. "You must,
have learned how to do that almost from the very begin-
ning, and one doesn't expose friends to one's dangerous
experiments."

"What—what do you mean?" she stumbled, still going
for it. tt! don't understand what you're saying."

"What I mean is that that routine would probably have
had every sorcerer and male wizard challenging each other
in earnest, just to win the chance to touch your hand," I
explained, this time deliberately folding my arms. "Rather
than decimate the ranks of the Sighted, Graythor kept you
isolated while he tried to figure out what he'd done wrong,
probably hoping he could undo it. It's too bad he didn't
scrap the experiment and forget all about it."

"How can you say that to me?" she asked in a strength-
less whisper, the tears now rolling down her cheeks. "I
know I insulted you earlier, but I was afraid you would try
to hurt me without giving me a chance to explain! If you'd
ever been hurt by a man, had ever been taken advantage of
by someone stronger the way I was, then you would
understand—and maybe sympathize just a little."

Oh, she was really good, that one, and I was able to
appreciate just how good when I felt myself brushed with a
general suppression-release counterspell. Somehow she had
found out about the suppression spell Morgiana had put on
me, and had just touched me with the counterspell that
would have released it—if it hadn't already been released.
My magical defenses had made no attempt to stop me
counterspell, of course; release from involuntary suppres-
sion is a positive act, and my defenses were set to counter
only negatives- If the counterspell had done what it had
been expected to do, I would have regained all those
memories with a jarring crash, and then would have imme-
diately been on the small woman's side.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        365

"I'm afraid I'm all out of sympathy where you're con-
cerned," I told her, trying to keep my fury from building
out of control. "Graythor never took advantage of you,
he's not that kind of a man, but I'll bet you took enough
advantage of your own. He probably gave you everything
you asked for—until you asked for one thing too many. I
wonder what that could have been."

"I wanted him to make this world a better place for
someone as perfect as I am!" she spat, apparently more
angry over her trick not having worked man over anything
I'd said. She was a true and complete egotist—as well as
completely insane. "This world has things and people that
offend me, but he refused to wipe them out!" she blazed,
fee useless act discarded like a cape dropped from shrug-
ging shoulders. "He—refused—me, and that was when I
first realized how much I hated him. I took the balance
stone and put it out of his reach, but he sent the seven of
you after it and you got it back! Now he's hiding away, his
mind gone from his body so I won't be able to make him
help me again, but I don't need his help! When he returns
and awakens he'll be devastated, because he'll know that
the balance stone was brought back in time to save this
filthy world, but I was here td^take it again! And I will
take it again!"

She was nearly foaming at the mouth by then. her small
hands closed to fists as she leaned toward me in her rage,
absolute determination in every line of her body. The next
instant, with her lips moving near-soundlessly, a raging
green whirlwind attacked me, trying to draw the breath
from my lungs and the life from my body. The strength
behind the attack was considerable, all of her energies
directed toward my destruction, and I understood at last
why the ambushers coming at us a few minutes earlier
hadn't been under compulsion. She'd been saving every-
thing she had to face me, as she'd clearly suspected—or
expected—she would have to do. She hadn't used the
entry because she hadn't wanted to, not because I'd in-
sulted her into facing me.

The violent green whirlwind raged around me, scream-
ing silently in its attempt to break through my shielding,
but that shielding wasn't the result of a minute or two of

366             SHARON GREEN

casual spelling. I had to brace myself against the sheer
power of the attack, but aside from that it didn't reach me.
After about fifteen seconds I raised my left hand and spoke
a spell of counterattack, and great yellow sheets of light
appeared and began to weave their way into the green
whirlwind, erasing whatever sections of it they touched. In
no more than another few seconds all but a lingering hint
of the whirlwind was gone, leaving nothing behind but a
faint green coloring of the room's shadows.

"That was very pretty," I said, wondering if it would
be possible to do something that had just occurred to me.
"Next time let's use pink and red with maroon highlight-
ing. Or would you prefer a different color scheme?"

"You don't fool me," she sneered, straightening from
the pose she'd held through the attack. "Your counter was
more passive than active, with less strength than it should
have had- How much magic have you had to use today,
girl? How far have you drained the pitiful amount of
power you have to begin with? And, more importantly,
how much do you have left? Not enough, I'll wager, to
keep this up for long!"

And then she was at me again, with bright orange
streaks of lightning that tried to skewer me where I stood.
This time I called large brown cushions into being to
accept the thrusts of the orange streaks and then absorb
them, but all she did was laugh at my efforts even though
they were successful. Once again my counter had been
more passive than active, and even as I lowered my left
hand I was as aware as she of the faintest of tremors in it. I
had used a tot of magic that day, not to mention moving
five people and six horses through a couple of gates, but 1
couldn't afford to be tired. I couldn't afford to be tired,
and 1 wouldn't be!

"If I'm all that helpless, then you won't mind joining
me in Hellfire combat," 1 said, touching my hand to the
box of the balance stone hanging at my waist. I couldn't
let that woman—that creature—regain possession of the
stone no manor what it cost me, and as painful as the
combat would be, it would still be better than the other
idea I'd had. "What do you say. Lady Perfection? Would
you like to form the combat cylinder, or shall I?"

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

"There will be none of that!" she snapped, suddenly no
longer amused, her body stiff rather than simply still "I
could hardly be adept at Hellfire combat when I've never
been to even a single Conclave, and I won't have you do
to me what you did to Draffan. If you try and I'm about to
lose, I'll send my own Hellfire to Graythor's helpless
body!"

"Leaving his mind nothing to return to," I said with
growing disgust, and then another realization came to me.
"Draffan, you said! That's the name of the Sighted I faced
that night at the inn, right at the beginning of the journey.
That must have been you disguised as the barmaid, so you
were there—and made not the least effort to help your
dupe when he was about to lose his life for you."

"And risk revealing myself so early in the game?" she
asked with a sound of derision, tossing her head. "1
wanted to see you all suffer first, and that's what 1 did-
Now I'm growing bored with this, and I want to see it
end."

Her third attack was blazing silver discs cutting at me,
but even as I fended them off I began the process of
gathering to me every breath of strength I had, and then I
began building the spell I hadn't wanted to use. If I could
have spared the concentration I would have begun shaking
in fright, but 1 hadn't the time to be frightened, not even at
the thought of using unSeen magic. There was nothing to
See with unSeen magic, nothing but a concept or an idea,
nothing to describe in detail but the nebulousness of thought.
It was black, black for the lack of solidity, black for the
lack of true knowledge—and black for the picture of the
rest of one's life, should the spell be the least bit off.
Steadiness stayed with me, but the warmth of life did not; I
gathered what I needed, and me ice of fear as well.

And then I thrust the last of the discs away and began
my own attack, the only attack 1 would have the time or
the strength for. I stood straight and tall as I raised my
right hand and began speaking me spell, a spell which, as
far as I knew, had never before been spoken. The woman
frowned as she heard the words, trying to translate them to
something she could understand, but then distraction came
when she pushed at my strength and couldn't move it. The

368             SHARON GREEN

power I gave to the spell was building an ever-thickening,
invisible sphere around her, and push though she might
with all of her strength, she wasn't finding it possible to
break out of it.

"What are you doing?** she cried, putting her arms out
to either side of her, as though to keep the invisible walls
of the sphere from crushing in on her. "Where are you
getting all that strength? You can't possibly have'that
much left, you simply can't!"

"I don't,'* I told her in what felt like deep distraction,
most of my attention and all of my concentration on main-
taining that thickening sphere. "What I'm using is the
reserve reservoir I began building the day I nearly ran out
of strength and also nearly died because of it. You sent
that beast through the gate to attack us inside my warding
of our camp, and ever since then a small bit of whatever
power I used was shunted into the reservoir for storage.
Against need. Like now."

"No," she whispered, shaking her head, her arms still
out against the tightening sphere. "You couldn't have
done that! You—! What are you doing?"

"I'm creating a very small world," 1 told her, floating
in my effort to hold the necessary concentration. "When
me world is complete there will be nothing in it that can't
be found in this world—except that magic won't be possi-
ble- It won't simply be a blind world, it will be dead, no
magic, no magic use, no magical ability of any sort. In-
just a little while."

"No!" This time she screamed the word, finally under-
standing what my spell had been about—and what it meant
to her. She had been created by magic, and only her own
magical ability maintained her existence; in a world with-
out magic she would not simply be unSighted, she would
simply not be. It was a horrible thing to do to her. but 1
hadn't been able to find another way.

"I won't let you!" she screamed, white-faced and terri-
fied, and then she turned back to the entry she'd chosen
not to use earlier. She tried to approach it, found that she
couldn't, then whirled back to face me with her hands to
her head. "Eppan, help me!" she screamed, the terror

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER        369

raging inside her plain in her body and face. "Eppan, if
.^yottlove me you have to kill her!"

'"Even if I hadn't been holding the spell I wouldn't have
known what she was talking about, and then I caught a
movement in the shadows to my left, just out of the comer
of my eye. The movement came again and then the figure
of a man appeared, stepping out of the shadows he'd
apparently been in all along. He was a very big man,
roughly dressed in homespun and worn boots, not the least
sense of Sight about him, his long face in need of a shave.
As he moved closer to a candle I could see the way he
looked at the woman, with adoration and overpowering
love, and then I saw him turn his head to me. A snarl of
rage took him as he quickly drew a knife from his belt,
and then he was moving toward me with deliberation, his
intention clear.

"Kill her and I'm yours, Eppan!" the woman urged,
pulling at the collar of her riding habit. "I won't leave you
behind to guard my escape, I'll take you with me! Kill her
before she kills me!"

The maa paused to throw a look of ecstacy over his
shoulder before continuing on, and the cold that had begun
its climb in me earlier completed*the journey. Everything 1
bad was wrapped up in holding that spell around the
woman, and that included what usually maintained my
personal defenses; if I tried to protect myself from the man
with the knife, I would lose my hold on the woman. If I
lost my hold 1 would never get it back again, but if I just
stood there he would kill me. My head was whirling with
the effort I was making and my mouth was dry with the
fear of death, but the woman was gasping inside the
sphere, as though it was air being pushed out instead of
magic, and that meant I coul<ln't let go! The man was
getting closer and the dizziness was increasing, and I was
suddenly afraid I couldn't hold out any longer. The knife
in his hand was rising high, getting ready to come down,
and then—

And men a flash of rust-colored leather went past me,
thudding into the big man and knocking him backward.
They hit the floor together, the two of them, two big men
fighting for the possession of a knife, and I couldn't quite

SHARON GREEN

370

hear the scuffling of their struggle through the ringing in
my ears. The woman in the sphere was on her knees, her
face showing that she was trying to scream, her hands
tearing at her throat. I began to feel the lack of air myself
then, my lungs already starting to labor, my hand to my
mouth to keep the illness from spilling out. and men the
woman in the sphere winked out of existence—and so did
1.

CHAPTER 15

I came awake and stretched luxuriously, really enjoying
the comfort around me, no longer tired but feeling too lazy
to make any more of an effort. Stretching was just about
the only effort I was up to right then, an effortless effort,
no magic needed, nothing but—

Magic! And effort' Had 1 done it? Was it over?

"Never sit up that fast, child, it will make you dizzy,'*
Graythor said gently, leaving his'chair to come over to the
bed 1 now sat in.'I was dizzy from sitting up so fast, but
there were concerns a lot more important than that.

"What happened?" I asked with one hand to my head,
the other to the empty place at my waist, almost afraid to
voice the words. "Did I do it, or did she get the stone
again? Graythor, tell me—!"

"Everything is fine, so just calm yourself," he soothed,
sitting down on the edge of me bed to face me. "The
balance stone is returned to its proper place, the upheavals
are all but stopped, and every member of your quest com-
panionship has survived to talk about me experience. A
number of them were wounded in the last encounter, but
I've seen to it that they're now fine."

"All but you," I said with the sudden wave of pained
understanding washing over me, putting one hand out to
hesitantly touch his. "Oh. Uncle Graythor, I'm so sorry!
ff there had been any other way—!"

"No, now, don't start feeling sorry for doing what had

SHARON GREEN

372

to be done,'' he said as he took my hand in both of his, his
sallow face serene but his dark eyes filled with the pain of
eternity. "It was something I couldn't do for myself,
Laciel child, so you had to do it for me. In the two days
you've been asleep, I've come to terms with my feelings
as completely as I ever will."

Which, from the look of him, didn't seem to be more
than halfway, if that far. I took a tighter grip on one of his
hands to make sure he didn't pull away—and to keep the
contact for myself as well—and began to bring myself
down from flapping.

"I've been sleeping for two days?" 1 asked, taking a
deep breath. "In these same clothes? I knew I was drain-
ing myself down to empty, but 1 didn't think it would take
me that long to come back."

"It took as long as it had to, and if you hadn't needed
the time, you would have awakened sooner," he said with
a hint of his old, crooked smile, but then the lightness
faded again. "You might as well ask now, you know.
Avoiding the issue and saving it for later won't make it the
least bit easier."

"That's right," I said with a nod. "1 forgot you've had
two whole days to adjust to the thing, so I don't suppose
you'd mind telling me why. Nothing more complex than
that, just why."

"Nothing more complex than that." he repeated with
the faint smile back again, squeezing my hand once before
letting it go. "I suppose what you're asking basically is a
simple question. Why did I create her. The answer, just as
simply, is that I was lonely."

I looked at him, not understanding, and the warmth I
had always enjoyed in his eyes returned as he put a gentle
hand to my face.

"Laciel, my very dear girl," he smiled. "While you
were growing up my company was always a source of
pleasure for you, a delicious event to be anticipated, a
delight while indulged in, a satisfying memory when over.
I was always 'Uncle' Graythor, and your unfeigned enthu-
siasm was the bright spot of my life from the day it first
began. You've grown to be an intelligent, capable woman

THE FAR SIDE OP FOREVER

373

and sorceress, but the one thing you're still unable to See
''IS that other people don't share your opinion of me."

"Living proof that even the Sighted can be short-
Sighted," I said, making a rude sound to underscore my
opinion. "And what about Morgiana? She's always felt
close to you."

"Yes, she has," he conceded with a sober nod of his
head. "She's been a close, true friend for more than a
century, but please note the word 'friend'. Many, many
years ago Morgiana fell in love, and when he died her
love—the love of a woman for a man—died with him.
She's never been able to feel the same toward any other
man, and that's what 1 found myself lonely for: the love of
a woman for a man."

He rose from the bed and began to pace, his hands
behind his back, his head down as he sought within him
for answers to his own questions.

"It's far from easy being one of the most powerful
wizards alive, Laciel," he murmured. "Most people fear
you terribly, even those who are Sighted and should there-
fore be less easily impressed. Those who claim to want to
be your friend aren't always looking for friendship, and
the time comes when it's no longer easy to distinguish
between those who want no more tnan companionship, and
those who do. There are people of normal appearance who
^ow to feel that way—consider how a man such as 1, an
ugly, twisted man, might come to feel. I could easily have
changed my looks, of course, but I'm afraid I'm a bit too
proud to spend my life behind a lie.

"I discovered when I first became a wizard that there
are always women available to the powerful, women who
come willingly and with great eagerness, women who will
remain with a man and give him everything he desires for
what he is able to give them—or almost everything. The
one thing they seldom, if ever, give is their heartfelt love,
a thing of little value to many, a thing as precious as life to
others. I reached a time when I could no longer bear the
loneliness, when I felt I must have that heartfelt love or
perish, and that was the time I became determined to do it.
I created a woman—but one who would be capable of
loving a man such as I."

SHARON GREEN

374

"What do you mean, a man such as you?" I asked
when he fell silent, standing in the middle of the room.
stanng down at his feet. "What I'm trying to say is, what
specifically did you do to make yourself a love object for
her? What did you have to specify to make her capable of
loving you?"

"I specified that she be capable of loving ugliness," he
answered in a tone that said he was stating the obvious,
raising his eyes again to look at me. "She was absolutely
magnificent, the most beautiful and complex thing I ever
created, and at first she was wonderful to me. She loved
me the way I'd always wanted to be loved, and we both
were very happy—and then things began to change. The
gifts 1 gave her dissatisfied her, the servants dissatisfied
her, the house, the gardens, the sky! She began to take
more pleasure in looking at herself than at anything else
around her, and the—manner—she had somehow learned
to adopt put everyone exposed to her at her mercy. I had
meant to marry her, and introduce her at Conclave as
having come from a far-distant world, but after she began
to change I realized that I first needed to learn what had
gone wrong with her. I pored over my notes, conducted
dozens of experiments, even attempted to talk with her,
but all to no avail. At last she—demanded something
so—abominable—of me that I flatly refused to even con-
sider it, and the next day she was gone with me balance
stone. I should have followed after her myself, but I
discovered that the thought of harming her was beyond
me. Instead I gathered you and your quest companions,
and even now, with the whole matter completely resolved,
I still don't know what I did wrong."

"I'll bet I know," I said, inspiration creeping up on me
and straightening me where 1 sat. "It's so obvious if you
only look at it in the right way."

Graythor was looking at me rather wan it, and his
expression was made up of blankness, surprise, a little
confusion—and just a hint of reproach. It isn't usual for a
sorceress to be able to See something a wizard can't, but
that wasn't the sort of sight I'd been referring to.

"Uncle Graythor, do you remember teaching me about
balance in magic?" I asked, secretly pleased to be able to

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

375

.^lecture him about something. "You pointed out that that
^t»lance was only an extension of the rest of nature, that
balance always occurs even if we can't see it right away.
la order for you to create a woman capable of loving
Ugliness, you also had to create one who hated beauty. I'm
sure you weren't consciously aware of it when you devised
your spell, but in order for nature to balance, it had to be
that way,"

"I'm afraid I didn't consider that at all," he said with
an inward-turned frown, the distraction in his eyes saying
he was probably reviewing his spell. "That may account
fix some of her later behavior, but at first ..."

"At first she was like a newbom. and knew only what
you told her," I interrupted, determined to divert him from
what he considered happy memories. "I'll bet you were
careful to explain that it was ugliness she could love, and
Ohat you were ugly. She, of course, took your word for it,
especially since she could see the difference between your
looks and those of your servants.

"But that was when she knew almost nothing about the
worid," I plowed on, refusing to let him interrupt. "The
more days and weeks she lived, the more she learned, and
what she learned most about, Fm sure, was ugliness. It
was something she was literally treated to love, so it
would have been natural for her to search it out. I'm sure it
didn't take her long to discover that the greatest ugliness
doesn't lie in the physical, but on another plane entirely."

He looked at me sharply, knowing I was trying to make
a point, but he wasn't going to help me with that point.

"Do you remember that plane I almost died on?" I
asked, not about to let him off the hook. "Physically it
was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen, but the death it
hid was so hideous that I still shudder when I think about
it. If you want to find the best in ugliness, so to speak, you
go looking for the things that woman found. Like falling
madly in love with your own self, and putting the welfare
of that self above anything and everything. Like turning
' people into adoring zombies, ones who arc even willing to
give up their lives for you. Like creating the most beautiful
tilings ever seen—just so you can destroy them. Like
delighting in the thought of the death of millions of inno-

376              SHARON GREEN

cent people, brought about for die sole purpose of hurting
one individual. If you want to talk about the physical, I'm
sure the mutilation of living things and people would have
given her a chuckle or two, but not much beyond that."

"And, of course, that was the reason she began hating
the things around her," he said with a sigh of pain,
hanging his head. lt! would point out to her the beauty in
things, and all she could do was hate mem. Balance. I had
forgotten all about that, but happily not when I thought
about the one who would be capable of defeating her.''

This time I was me one who didn't understand, and his
faint, crooked smite came back.

"There were two major reasons I chose you, and neither
of them had anything to do with me closeness of our
relationship," he said. "If I could have spared you me
arduous journey I knew you would have, I would certainly
have done so, but your presence was vital. At some point
mere was bound to be a confrontation between you two,
and I required someone who could withstand her. Another
woman like herself would naturally have been me best for
that, but 1 also needed one who would not fall victim to
her wiles. She truly joyed in making people loathe'her,
and then using that—manner—of hers to mm mem ador-
ing. It was a virtual certainty thai she would attempt the
thing during the final confrontation, as proof of her true
superiority, knowing nothing about that inch-thick intoler-
ance of yours. When people are open and direct with you,
you're the same with mem; when they first try to, use
duplicity, however, they afterward find it impossible to
gain your trust. The intolerance in you raises a barrier of
sorts, and I've never seen anyone breach that barrier."

"What you call intolerance, I call caution," I said with
a shrug, wondering if I'd just been complimented or in-
sulted. "I learned during my time on the streets that if you
can't trust someone once, you can't afford to ever trust
them- Ypu learn mat by getting kicked in the teeth a
couple of times, and because of that tend not to forget it. I
suppose that makes me someone who isn't very nice, but
there's nothing I can do about it,"

"Nonsense, I happen to mink you're very nice," he
said at once, clearly going defensive on my behalf. "Do

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

377

you think I allow everyone on this world to call me
uncle?"

"You would if they wanted to," I countered, knowing
it was me truth. "That's because you happen to be, despite
your physical appearance, mat rarest of things, a truly
beautiful person. That, incidentally, is me reason the woman
grew to hate you: she could only love ugly things, and
you, no matter what you look like, are not ugly. And it
didn't take her very long to find that out, did it?"

He went from startlement to frowning in the blink of an
eye. but he couldn't seem to find the words to argue the
contention. 1 felt rather smug for a minute or two, but then
1 remembered something mat let me find what he couldn't.
- "But you are a lot more callous man 1 ever realized,'11
added, folding my legs in front of me as he looked up with
a surprised and questioning stare. "I found out the real
reason why Rikkan Addis was made expedition leader, and
I can't tell you how shocked I was. To send him along
because you needed someone who was expendable? To
include him in the group because someone might be needed
to die so that the rest of us could live? Uncle Graythor,
how could you?"

*'Laciel, my dear, I didn't/^he answered, and then his
surprise turned to chuckling. "Rikkan Addis was made
leader of the expedition for all me reasons I gave you to
begin with, not the least of which is his ability to under-
stand and 'handle' people- You must have given him a
very difficult time, which apparently led him to decide that
his only option was to make you feel sony for him. With
anyone else he could have used Persuasion, but me Sighted
aren't susceptible to it. From your reaction, I would say he
was successful.''

"Why, mat no good rat'" I gasped, finally seeing me
real truth. "He lied to me! Saying straight out that I wasn't
qualified to be leader got him nothing but a challenge, so
he found a way to play on my sympathy! I'll never believe
another word he tells me!"

"Why not?" Graythor asked gently, trying not to show
how amused he was. "It was you who refused to listen to
the truth, wasn't it? You were not only not qualified to
lead a group like that, your position as magic user made

378             SHARON GREEN

the situation doubly difficult. Toward the end of the jour-
ney, going through the worlds of magic, you were un-
doubtedly giving most of the orders. That was necessary
for everyone's safety, but people who become tense in
dangerous situations sometimes react to that tension by
distrusting the person who is responsible for their safety. If
that person also happens to be ultimate leader, the tension
can increase to explosive proportions. If there's someone
else who has the final say, however, the situation is much
more bearable; there's always a higher authority to be
appealed to if the protector seems about to do something
foolish—whether the proposed act is foolish or not. And
when you finally reached Cloud's Heart, did you really
have the time to think about leading? Could you have
protected your group as well as you did if there had been
other things distracting you? I think you know the true
answer to that as well as I. And weren't you the least bit
happier when you were no longer concerned with the
question of leadership?"

"I don't believe he did it just to make me happy," I
muttered, looking down at the bare feet folded in front of
me. ' "Maybe for the good of the quest, but not to make me
happy. And it doesn't make much difference anymore.
anyway, does it? Uncle Graythor, 1 need you to help me
with something. There was a spell put on the male mem-
bers of the group almost from the very beginning, and I'd
like you to dissolve it."

"What sort of spell are you referring to?" he asked with
a frown, moving nearer to the bed. "I examined everyone
most carefully when the—successful ending of the episode
recalled my mind to my body, and I found nothing."

"You must have missed it,'* I said with something of a
shrug. "I discovered very early on that the male members
of our party all seemed to be in love with me, which
naturally had to mean that a spell had been put on them
and was being maintained by my ability. Now that you
know what to look for, you can remove it, can't you?"

"Laciel, my very dear child," he said, sighing deeply
as he sat to take my hand again. "If I, as you maintain,
suffer from the affliction of self-blindness, it's an affliction
we share. Your male quest companions have no spell on

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

379

^l^&em, unless it's the spell of your loveliness. That, of

-h^&urse, was another reason why it would have been unwise

•^jBEving you as expedition leader. Men sometimes find it
^ :llifficult obeying the objects of their affection, and if there
;./iBflB dissension because more than one of them succumbed,
&e difficulty of separating them would not have been
yws. Also, it was not impossible that you would find
yourself—ah—taken with one of them, which might then
\t»ve brought about acts of favoritism. As I said, I searched
Wost carefully, and there are no spells on any member of
. -fte group."

' - The look in his dark eyes urged me to believe what he'd
'said, but I was too—stunned? confused? lost?—to do any-
thing but sit there and stare at him. They hadn't been
under a spell? I really was pretty enough to attract the
Serious attention of men? I lowered my head and put my
Aands into my hair, struggling to accept that, trying to
fight my way back to where 1 could think again, but it
wasn't easy. What had Graythor said, that night in my
room at the inn? That Morgiana's power and my potential
ability had turned the men I'd met until then diffident and
hesitant? Could it really be true?

And then I sat very straight again, realizing something
awful. If none of them had been under a spell, then Rik—
What he'd said— About the way he felt—

"Uncte Graythor, where are they?" I asked, unfolding
my legs to swing them over the side of the bed. "The rest
Of the group— Where are they?"

"Why, most likely in the salon on this floor, enjoying
the last of their lunch," he answered in surprise, startled
by the way I'd jumped to my feet. "Why do you . . ."

1 suppose he may have finished what he'd started to
say, but that was all of it I heard. As soon as he answered
cay question I headed for the door at a run, not even
caring {hat I was barefoot, not even seeing the neat, blae, well-
ftimished room that was always mine when I stayed there.
My mind was too busy trying to think of what to say to
notice trivia, to figure out what I could possibly do to
repair the damaged mess I'd made. He'd told me he loved
me and I'd ignored him, he'd asked about where he stood
' in relation to Zail. and I'd—I'd told him something that

380             SHARON GREEN

was the literal truth, but in a way that made it a lie. He'd
lied to me for the sake of the quest, but my lie hadn't been
for anyone's sake but my own.

1 barely remember flinging open the door of my room
and racing down the hall, but I clearly recall my arrival at
the arch leading into the salon. They were laughing at
something over cups of wine, the remnants of their meal
spread out on the table before them, and when they saw
me come through the arch they all turned to look at me.

All four of them.

"Hey, Laciel, you're finally awake," Zail called, send-
ing me a grin. "Come and have something to eat—or at
least something to drink."

"You appear far better than when last we saw you,"
Kadrim said, also grinning. "Do come and join us."

"Thought for a while you were going to make us wait
for a month," Su said, her own faint version of a grin in
evidence. "If you haven't changed your mind we still have
the Wolf tribe to visit, and Kadrim said he's coming with
us."

"But before that you have to visit with us for a while, at
least until the wizard sends us home," Dranna said, her
warm smile open and sincere. "I'd like the chance to
thank you for taking the time to get me out of that last
fight. I'm sure you saved my life."

"Where's—where's Rik?" I asked with a great deal of
difficulty, approaching their table a lot more slowly than
I'd approached the salon. "Has he finished already and
gone back to his room? Or maybe out to see the city? I
suppose I could ..."

"Laciel, he's gone back to his world," Zail interrupted,
telling me the one thing I hadn't wanted to hear, his
amusement gone with everyone else's. "He didn't stay
any longer than it took for the wizard to heal his wounds.
InThig heard him say he wanted to leave, and volunteered
to open a gate for him. The wizard said he'll need a few
days to gather the power to send us back the way he
brought us, and when Rik said he'd rather not wait,
InThig—"

InThig. Zail's voice trailed off when I turned away,
which was just as well, as I had already stopped listening.

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

38l

'"^ -^

U.'pd forgotten about the lie I'd told InThig, forgotten I
..Si-^ljtto't told it the truth the way I'd meant to, and now Rik

''^1'as gone. It had been him, I suddenly realized, who had

^Illled my life at the very end, keeping that man with the
'.'^SSlSSe from killing me while I held my spell. And he might

; ISWB have been wounded when he did it! For the second
:.^ifiBle he'd saved my life and then he had simply left, to get

^H^Melf away from a place he knew he wasn't wanted.

>|6Bew it because I'd told him so.

) > "<Mi, now, don't you know how lucky you are?"
"•Dranna's voice came through, bringing me the realization

^ffiat tee four had left their table to stand around me,

-^Jiolding or patting me in an attempt to give comfort, "I

-^thought every now and again that you might be feeling
.^(ittracted to him, but you don't really want someone like

-Aim. He becomes an animal, Laciel, and no matter how

- luce he is when he isn't one, you still can't trust that kind.
Jiff you ever tried to—get to know him better, you'd almost
Certainly find yourself savaged. No woman needs some-

- tiling like dial."

;  Her pretty face was looking realty compassionate, and it
came to me that she wasn't tryiag to be nasty and spiteful,
oftly helpful. Most people aren't responsible for the preju-
dices they have, no matter how hurtful those prejudices are
to the innocent; if / didn't know that, no one di3. It also
came to me that Rik hadn't said anything when I'd told
him Dranna liked him; by then he must have known how
she rcaUy felt, or he wouldn't have been so upset when she
begfi) kissing him when she didn't know what she was
doing. He considered Zail a rival he'd lost to, Dranna
someone who was disgusted by him, Kadrim and Su ca-
' sual acquaintances, and me someone who didn't want him
Bear her. The wonder wasn't that he'd left, but that he'd
stayed as long as he had.

**ff yea want to find him first before we visit the Wolf
Hibe; I'll go with you," Su said to me, strong disapproval

-• is her eyes for the opinions Dranna had voiced. "Shouldn't
c tate tod long, and then there'll be four of us. Kadrim
.:thinks he'll be staying with me for a while."

-^ "Indeed," Kadrim agreed with a grin when I immcdi-
;-?Wely brightened at the suggestion. "To return to my own

382             SHARON GREEN

world now would be to put my sons in an undeserved
quandary. By now my holdings have surely been divided
amongst them, and their concept of honor is such mat they
would just as surely return all of it to me were / to return.
And even beyond that, it seems 1 have found a woman
whose like has never before been known to me, one who
had no difficulty in seeing the man beneath the boy. It has
become my intention to prove myself worthy of her."

He and Su were looking at each other with something
more than simple attraction, and I suddenly realized that
Kadrim's face had been changed a little, to make him
appear just a few years more mature. The two of them now
looked to be about the same age, and me happiness that
filled me was the first I'd felt in a very long time. They'd
keep each other from being lonely and sad, I knew they
would, and all I wanted to do was hug them very tight.

"Excuse me," Graythor's voice came, interrupting the
flurry of most of us starting to speak at once. We all
turned to see that he'd followed me to the salon, and no
one's commenting on his real appearance showed they
already knew all about it. "You're certainly free to go
where you wish and with whom you wish, Laciel child,"
he said, walking toward us with his usual warm smile. "I
would, however, like to ask you the favor of returning as
soon as you may. The longer you wait to begin your
studies, the more valuable time will be wasted.**

"Studies? What studies?" I asked, having no idea what
he was talking about. "I've already been certified as a
sorceress, and it will be years yet before I reach wizard
strength. What is it you expect me to study?"

"My dear girl, surely you know by now," he said as he
stopped, surprised—and possibly somewhat upset as well.
"It won't be that long at all before you reach wizard
strength, and by men you really should be prepared to begin
your life's work. I'm aware of the fact that most wizards
spend a good deal longer getting into it, but most also take
a good deal longer showing a talent for it. You, my dear.
don't show a talent but a gift, and it would be criminal to
allow it to go to waste. It was the second reason you were
chosen as magic user for the quest, the second reason

THE FAR SIDE OF FOREVER

383

you gave me no opportunity to discuss with you

»i

1^*1 don't understand," I said, still completely bewil-
taftd. "Uncle Graythor, what is it I'm going to be

^*Wny, Laciel, how can you not know?" he asked,
peaking very gently. "The speed and assurance with
jbsch you learned my spells, the way you kept adapting
a^fiteic to your needs during the journey—and what you
,^||cd to win the confrontation. Child, Morgiana and I have
^s^Sg agreed: your place awaits you doing vital research,
„ Sivestigations which will benefit us all. The work you

•^are born for is unSeen magic."

'^^ UnSeeo magic. Black magic. Everyone around me ex-
^aimed in awed delight, congratulating me for being good
enough to qualify for such an honor, and it really was an

-jfconor. Only the best ever got involved in working with
thire ideas, but rather than feeling honored, all I felt was
<faid. Talented or not, gifted or not, working with unSeen
vaswc was dangerous, very, very dangerous. How could I

;??®olooking for Rik, find him and tell him I really didn't
disHfce him after all—and then come back to work with
soroeming that could kill me at any .time? Would that be

/..fair to him? Would that be fair to anyone I—didn't dislike?
It looked like it was a good thing he'd left after .all, the
best thing for trim he could possibly have done.

— "Uncle Graythor," I said without looking at him, my
arms wrapped around me against the chill I felt from
Standing there, barefoot on the carpeting. "That woman
<W were ^discussing earlier; what was her name?"
/.^•^SS* came to me without a name, of course, so until
she decided on one for herself, I simply called her what
she was to me," he answered, back to sounding the way I
nbw.felt. "Beloved."

-• ' Yes, I thought with a sigh, still not looking up, and then
began considering what I would do with the Wolf tribe.